Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. All hail the magnificent Stephenie Meyers.

12. Realizations.

Epov:

She turned and looked at me where I was still standing in the doorway. I smiled my crooked smile at her. I knew she liked this smile because I noticed before in Biology class how it set her pulse racing in a visible vain in her neck. She answered my smile still walking backwards. Silly Bella turn around before you walk into something, the thought just crossed my mind when she walked smack into some blondish boy. My arms lifted automatically in the air as if to catch her but so did the boy's. He held Bella close to him and steadied her saving both of them from a meeting with the cold wet ground.

I was grateful he saved her but did he really have to hold her that tight? Why can everybody else hold Bella accept for me? I walked into Spanish in a rather foul mood and slumped into my seat. During class I paid extra attention and tried not to think of the brief moment I did get to hold her at La Push. I tried to concentrate on other things that had nothing to do with how perfectly her body fitted to mine. How her strawberry flavored hair knew exactly how to toy with my mind. I didn't even dare think about how warm and soft she felt against me. Did my body try and tell me that I cared more about her than I originally thought? Was that the reason I flew into fits of jealousy and the way my senses was hypersensitive too her every move? Lastly did I want to be more than just friends with Bella?

To be honest I didn't know. I was so distracted by the thoughts running wild in my head that I didn't realize that the bell had gone and that the class was completely deserted. I walked quickly to my car and couldn't help but notice that the yellow Porsche was already gone. I was just about to unlock my door when I overheard two boys talking.

"I'm telling you, Bella swan is the most beautiful girl in this school." I turned and recognized the speaker as the blondish guy who saved Bella from eating concrete earlier.

"I don't know Mike. She always keeps to herself and looks so small and fragile." So his name was Mike?

"You know what they say. It's the quiet ones that are hottest in bed. Just you watch, I'm going to ask her to the Christmas Ball and before the night is over I will pop her cherry."

I don't know how it happened. The one minute I was standing next to my car, my arm still frozen halfway to the door, the next moment I was choking Mike as I pushed him up the side of his car.

"If you so much as touch Isabella Swan I will break your arm in so many places that you won't be able to wipe your own ass. Do we understand each other you sick, revolting, disgusting little prick?" His eyes was almost popping out of his head, he nodded as much as my hold on him allowed him to. I let him go and he fell to the ground gasping for air.

I turned and got in my car, pulling away with screeching tires. I cringed at the sound and tried to calm down enough to not take my anger out on my car. Did I want more than friendship with Bella? Guess that answers that question. Actions have always spoken louder than words. I arrived home ten minutes earlier than usual. I dropped my bag on the sofa and headed for my hammock. I waited patiently for the restfulness to wash over me but it never did. It haunted me, taunted me and eventually I fell into a deep slumber.

I woke as Esme shook my shoulder. "Finally, you sleep like a rock. Somebody can break into this house, carry everything away and you would just keep on snoring." I sat up rubbing the sleep from my eyes and yawned.

"I do not snore."

She smiled, "No you do not. Now are you going to tell me what's bothering you?"

I looked at her arching an eyebrow. "Who says something is bothering me?"

She shrugged, "Your schoolbag is discarded on the sofa and you only come out here to clear your head. I know you better than you think Edward."

"It's just... I don't... There is... I have girl issues." I finally said when I could utter out a complete sentence. Esme smiled at me encouraging me to go on. "There's this girl at school who unlocks feelings in me that I thought are long forgotten. I say and do things around her that I wouldn't normally say or do. I feel very overprotective of her. I think I might be in love with her." I finally finished wording everything that bothered me. Esme's face began to shine as if she was admitting some kind of heat.

"Is she a good person?" I nodded. "Is she a good friend to others?" I nodded once again. "Is she intelligent and your emotional age?" I frowned, what Esme was getting at? I nodded again. "Is she single?" Esme was looking at me and her eyes tried to tell me that I'm missing the obvious. I nodded again. "Then what is the problem?"

That's when it all made sense. I was the problem, the only thing standing between me and Bella was me. I didn't want to risk getting hurt again. I got up and pulled Esme into a hug doing some silly dancing steps. "I love you Esme." I kissed her forehead and ran to my room.

I took out my box containing my family photos and started to paste them on the big notice board Carlisle insisted on being in my room. Did he foresee that I would one day need it for this purpose? I have never in the past two years looked at the photos once but as I pinned them on that board I sampled every one of them. The past had haunted me long enough. It was time to face it. It brought me here to Forks, to Bella and I did not want it any other way.

Carlisle arrived home carrying in the snacks he bought for the game. I did my homework in the living room sitting next to Esme who was sketching a new house.

"Is the TV on the right channel?" Carlisle asked as he made himself comfortable on the coach.

"Jip" I said popping the p. "Hey Carlisle I have a medical question for you. If every four out of five people suffer from diarrhea does that mean the fifth one enjoys it?" Carlisle started to laugh. Tears rolled down his cheeks and Esme was holding her stomach as she laughed as well. That set the mood for the rest of the evening. We watched the game and even a soppy romance with Esme. As I walked to my room an overwhelming feeling of belonging washed over me.

I woke up late and heard my stomach growling, it was about eleven am. I quickly jumped into the shower and then made some breakfast. I was still eating my omelet when I saw the note stuck to the fridge.

Sleepy head

Took the Volvo, remember the lake. Look after my car and I will look after yours. Don't be late for dinner.

Enjoy your day.

Carlisle

I smiled. I forgot I had to take his car. I finished up after breakfast and drove to Port Angeles. There were a few bookshops in town but one close to an alleyway caught my attention. I couldn't find parking close by and had to park a few blocks away. I walked back to the shop and as I entered I got the fine cent of dust. I spent about three hours looking for books, picking some of them up to read a few pages. I picked the top five books I wanted to read. Three of them were fantasy novels, one mystery and lastly a romantic book about a girl that falls in love with a vampire. When the clerk behind the counter saw this book she looked at me quirking her eyebrow. "It's for my girlfriend" I said simply.

I was halfway to the door when the strawberries hit me. I looked around and saw her standing in the classic's department. Her back was to me and I walked to her without even deciding to. It was like being pulled by a magnet. I stopped about a meter away, she didn't hear me since the thick carpet dampened my footsteps. I watched her for awhile drinking in all of her delicate features when she suddenly spoke.

"Do you always spy on people Edward or am I dressed funny?" She asked turning around looking at me.

There she goes and surprises me again, "How did you know I was standing behind you and you look breathtakingly beautiful as always?" I said making her blush a little. She was wearing skinny jeans, a black t-shirt and a white and blue Billabong top.

"I'm a female, need I say more. Are you starting your own library or something?" She asked indicating to all the books I bought.

"It's more like replenishing the stock. Have you decided if you're going to buy that or not? You've been paging trough it for twenty minutes now." I could read the name of the book Withering heights.

She sighed placing it back on the bookcase behind her," No, I already have a battered copy of that book because I've read it so many times. I just can't resist paging trough one when I see it."

I smiled my crooked smile, "I know the feeling. Are you done here, I'm kind of hungry and was hoping you'd like to join me." I wasn't that hungry bit I just wanted to spend some time with her.

"Sure. Why not, did you pay already?" I relaxed and hope I didn't look relieved.

"Yes all paid for in full."

I couldn't resist my urge to touch her and placed my hand on the small of her back and guided her to the door. She didn't seem to mind and I kept my hand there even though it felt like an electric current ran through it. It was storming outside. The rain fell so hard we couldn't see across the street.

"Wait here I'm going to fetch the car, I parked it a few blocks up the road." She nodded and I ran of into the rain. I fumbled for the car keys eagerly to get out of the rain. I had to wait for a traffic light to turn green before I finally made it back to the bookstore. Bella wasn't there.

I parked near the entrance door and jumped out. A movement near the alleyway caught my attention but when I looked there was nothing so I ignored it. Maybe she went back inside, I walked trough the door expecting to see her near the front of the shop but still no Bella. I searched the shop once, twice and even three times but to no avail. This can't be happening again I thought desperately as I ran back outside. The movement at the alleyway, maybe she waited there.

When I neared the alley way I heard a voice, "Do you like this bitch? Like how I feel? Just wait till I'm inside of you. I like it when their young and inexperienced."

I rushed around the corner. Bella was pushed up against the wall and some guy was pushing his crotch into her. "No! Not Bella! Not again! Take your fucking hands of her" I hit him so hard he stumbled away.

"Oh are you the boyfriend? You're not that big." He swung at me but I ducked under his arm hitting him in the stomach at the same time. He doubled over and I grabbed him by his hair kneeing him in the face. He slumped to the ground unconscious. I turned to look at Bella and saw how she fainted.

I quickly examined her for injuries, when I could find none I removed the rag he forced in her mouth and went to tie him up. I quickly called the police and went to try and bring Bella around. "Bella, Bella! Wake up, come on. Open those beautiful eyes and look at me. Please Bella don't do this to me. Bella demit wake up"

She finally opened them and I sighed where I was only hovering inches from her face. The police arrived a minute ago and already took away the bastard. "Thank God Bella." I pulled her to my chest rocking and soothing her. I kissed her head again and again as I held on to her as tight as I could, I was afraid I might loose her again.

"Are you ok? I'm sorry I should have never left you alone." I said as I tilted her face up to mine so that I could look into her eyes to make her see the regret I felt.

"It's not your fault Edward. Thank you for saving me." I wanted to argue but I kissed her forehead holding her even tighter. She has gone trough enough I could always argue with her later.

The police came to take her testimony. I held her hand the whole time wishing I could give her some of my strength and to shelter her from all their harsh questions. They would give her a call when she had to testify in court and gave us the all clear to go. Bella's phone rang just as we started towards my car.

"Um, actually I bumped into Edward at the book store and I was wondering if I could ride with him to Forks?" I was still holding her hand and nodded to show her I agree. I wasn't going to let her out of my sight before I knew she was safe at home. I placed my arm around her waist just to hold her closer to me and made it look lake I was guiding her to the car. "I am thank you Angela."

"Bella, is it ok if we go to my house first? I want Carlisle to give you a full examination, just to make sure nothing is wrong." I asked as we were heading back to Forks.

"Yes that's fine. I better call my mother and tell her what happened." She looked around her as if she saw something for the first time. "What happened to your car?"

I frowned. "Only you would notice something like that in these conditions. Carlisle asked me to change his tires for him." I took her hand and kissed the top of it to stop myself from pulling over and holding her again. "You scared me half to death you know. I fought I lost you forever." She said nothing and called her mother. She almost had to convince her mother a hundred times that she was ok when she finally hanged up.

I told Carlisle what happened, he nodded and gave Bella a quick but thorough examination. He gave her some pain medicine and asked her to inform him if she felt any dizziness or nausea. I would watch her for those same symptoms if she was even considering playing tuff. Esme pulled her into a big warm hug and forced her to drink some sweet tea.

We decided that Bella would stay here until we went to her house for dinner. She lay on a coach in the living room and talked to Esme and Carlisle. I was at the piano and while I played I kept her in my vision the whole time. When Esme told her I was adopted she looked at me, not with pity but a look of warmth. I smiled at her and stood up. As I passed Esme I kissed the top of her head and sat at the floor by Bella's head taking her hand again.

Esme smiled at something and I could practically hear the approval in her head when she looked at me holding Bella's hand. I traced patterns on her palm until we had to leave for the dinner. Everyone was already at Bella's house and Alice ran up to Bella and pulled her into a hug. Emmet and Jacob walked up to me. Great they are going to take me apart for letting something like that to happen to Bella. Instead they both gave me a hug and thanked me for saving her. There were even tears in Emmett's eyes. Great looks like Bella's friends are as much as unpredictable as she was. Her parents also hugged me and treated me as if I was their son instead of a guest in the house.

All of us clicked instantly as if we've been friends for a life time instead of a few hours. No one asked Bella any questions but I could see all the sideway looks she got began to irritate her. I wanted to pull her up in my arms and shield her from them. After dinner she slipped out of the room without anyone noticing but me. I found her sitting on a swing in the backyard.

"You ok Bella?" I asked and began to walk toward her.

"Yes, just needed some fresh air." I stopped behind her swing and started to push her lightly.

"You like to come here and escape the madness inside?" I said more as a statement than a question.

"Yes its restful here." When she said that something dawned on me, I was looking for that same thing yesterday but couldn't find it yet I'm relaxed and restful whenever I was near Bella. I stopped pushing her and realized that she was my inner peace. I leaned over her shoulder and she tilted her head sideways to look at me.

"I also have a place like that." I said bringing my face closer to hers.

"And where is that?" She barely chocked out. Was I having this effect on her?

"With you" I said and saw her tong flick out to wet her dry lips. I couldn't control the urge to kiss her any longer. "Bella" I sighed and then kissed her. Our lips melted together and started to move in synchronization.

I kissed her tenderly and when my tong shot out and touched her lips they parted and she deepened the kiss. The inside of her mouth was so soft and warm, as our tongues messaged one another her hand traveled up to my hair tangling in it and she pulled me closer. I moved my hands over her waist and pulled her over the swing so that she stood against me without breaking our kiss.

I moved my hand under her shirt placing it on her back and pushed her hard into me. The world was spinning and all I knew was the person standing against me kissing me with as much passion as I was kissing her. She started to move her hips to mine, stop this Edward before things get out of hand. I pulled away resting my forehead to hers as we both gasped for air.

"Edward? Edward is that you out there? It's time to go honey." I sighed I didn't want to go anywhere without Bella.

"I'll be there in a minute Esme." I said thinking I mite need a minute to recover from that kiss because my legs felt like jelly.

"Goodnight, my Bella." I said, once I felt recovered enough to walk, I kissed her tenderly on her lips again before I walked back to the house.

A/n ok I know this update is later than usual but thanks to the fact that its Easter holidays this weekend the workload doubles. I'm currently sitting at work typing this, making it look like I'm working just to get this to you guys. The next chapter will be posted on Tuesday because I'm going camping until late Monday and unfortunately there's no internet (cursing silently), sorry blame my brilliant step Dad.

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