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20. Virtue

My Beloved Emmett,

I'm going to miss you so much now. If it's at all possible,

I swear that I'll come home, ready to run back to you.

I hope by now you know why I left-- Carlisle needed me.

You'll understand that, won't you, baby? I promised him

that I would do my best to escape the disaster we're heading

towards, but I'm not very confident. He told me that you need

me to return home, after I'm finished evading Edward and

Alice's special abilities. What he means is when he's either

safe from harm or dead, I must go home.

I would agree with him, except that would be the easy

way out. It would be so easy to do as Carlisle wants, and

spare myself and you pain. But I can't take that easy way.

No matter what he says, I don't intend to let Carlisle die,

not while I'm around. If someone wants to kill him, they're

going to have to kill me first.

We're leaving the country, honey, as soon as we can,

and we don't plan to come back. I'm sorry, Emmett; that's

not enough, but it's all I can say. I left all the money I

could find from my purse in our room, on the dresser.

Money can't replace me or Carlisle, but I wanted to give

you what I could. I left the necklace I always wear, too--

it has my scent all over it, of course, so that's rather like

having me with you.

There's still so much to say, but I need to go. I love you,

Emmett, don't ever forget that.

Rosalie

"Esme, why did you never show me this before?" I asked, the letter shaking in my hands.

"I didn't want to hurt you," answered my mother, her dark eyes soft.

"So you've known all this time that Rose had gone to be with Carlisle?" asked Edward. He was sitting next to me, with Bella on his other side, his legs stretched as far as they could go in the narrow space between the airplane seats. Jasper, Esme, and Alice were across the aisle from us, with Esme closest. My mother acted like she wanted to reach out and take my hand, but there was too much empty air separating us.

"I knew the minute she left the house." Esme closed her eyes. "Rose's letter was folded into one of Carlisle's, the one we thought was four pages long. I--I kept this one apart from the others, in another book."

I was in shock, the words on the page jumping out at me again and again. My Rose had gone to die, apparently, somewhere in Ireland, with Carlisle. Without me. It wasn't fair, and I didn't plan on waiting for her to carry out this idea. "Why couldn't he have just told us?" I asked, folding up the letter and sticking it in the inner pocket on my jacket. "He didn't think we could handle it, or something?"

"Emmett, why would Carlisle tell us where he was going if he was sure it was a fatal move?" Edward sat up a little, and Bella moved with him, lacing her fingers with his.

"We could have helped him, and then maybe it wouldn't have been fatal."

"He'd never put us in danger if there was another way." Running his hands through his hair, Edward sighed. "Do you have the rest of the letters with you, Esme?"

Esme hesitated. "Yes, but they say nothing about where he was headed. You read them, Edward."

"What do they say?" I prodded. Maybe Rose had left something else for me...

"They're just-- moments. Moments from our lives together. Carlisle describes so much: Edward's first piano composition, Jasper and Alice's anniversary, and how we all work so well as a family. He wrote about hunting trips, vacations, anything."

"Kind of like how Rose left me the necklace," I thought aloud. "He wanted to give us something to remember him by."

"I don't think so," Jasper put in suddenly, turning away from the plane window. "How could Carlisle ever think we would forget him?"

"It happens." I shrugged. "I'm not saying we ever would, but even we forget stuff over time."

"Never," Esme whispered.

"I could never forget Carlisle," said Edward fiercely.

"I'll remember Carlisle," Bella added, shyly. Edward put his arms around her, and she laid her head on his chest.

Seeing them together made me think of Rosalie and I, so I turned my attention to Esme. "We're going to get them back, Esme," I said. "We'll get there in time." We have to, I thought, and saw Edward's hands tighten on Bella out of the corner of my eye.

"So, when we touch down in Dublin, what are we going to do? Alice, any new visions?" My brother was really taking his new leadership position seriously. Ever since we'd known where we were headed he had hurried us on.

"No, nothing new," replied Alice snappishly, opening her eyes and pulling off her earphones. She'd put them on at take-off and had listened to her mp3 player the whole time. "Do you mind? I love this song."

"All right," said Edward, raising his eyebrows. He was most likely thinking the same thing I was-- what was Alice's problem? "I'm of the opinion that we should divide into pairs and search straight out from the airport, unless Alice--" he glared at her "has another vision." She ignored him, nodding her head to her music. Even Jasper was looking at her with incredulity. "We should contact one another at least every six hours, just as a precaution. Emmett, would you mind working with Esme as a pair?"

"No, I wouldn't mind," I said. Duh.

"Good, I'd feel better if she was with you."

"Oh, Edward, I'll be fine," said Esme. "You don't need to--"

"I know, but we have to keep Mom safe," Edward grinned. "Sorry if I seem over-protective, Esme."

"No, dear, you're just needlessly concerned."

"Whatever we do," said Jasper, casually poking Alice in the side, making her twitch, "I say we keep in male/female pairs."

"Of course, that evens out things," said Edward. Bella and I gave him a mutual look that seemed to say, Uh-huh, sure.

"So, how long do you think it'll take us to search Ireland?" I asked. Maybe if I had a set time in my mind, I would be less jittery.

"That's hard to estimate. I don't know--one day tops, right, Jasper?"

"Hopefully more like fifteen hours, but it's better to be on the safe side."

"If I'm going to slow you down--" offered Bella glumly, but Edward interrupted soon after.

"We can't leave you alone, Bella, you know that."

"You know I want to help, but the more important thing is finding Carlisle and Rosalie."

I liked Bella more and more, even after being aquainted with her for a year. She was going to be my sister one of these days, so it was good that we got along. Unlike lots of the human girls, she was down-to-earth and practical-- most of the time. I also admired the fact that she was so self-sacrificing; she was perpetually thinking of other people's well-being, something, I was embarassed to admit, that didn't cross my mind very often. Now that I thought about it, Bella was similar to Carlisle, in a way. Edward snorted at the thought. Hey, bro, just a thought. It's not that creepy, really.

"You're staying with me, Bella," he said, back to the subject at hand. "I'm sure you won't slow me down too much."

"Oh, thanks," she sighed, rolling her eyes. He smiled and kissed her hand.

My light humor vanished, swallowed up by my last image of Rosalie, her face crumpling, her eyes giving the impression of unshed tears. I fougtht back the urge to run to the pilot's chair and demand the old geezer push the plane to its limits. Weren't we paying for a smooth, fast flight? It seemed like this trip would go on for eternity.

Where would I find Rose? Would it be immediately, or would it take hours? Would Carlisle be there? What if they split up for some reason? At any rate, I would find Rose, and I would bring her back with me. I wouldn't leave Ireland--or Europe, wherever she had gone--without her. It wasn't going to happen. One way or another, I'd be with Rose.

"Hey, Emmett," Edward said briskly, gripping my shoulder, "relax. Don't crack the armrests."

"Oh." I looked down blankly at the flimsy pieces of plastic.

"The plane's not going to travel faster if one seat needs a new pair of armrests. Try to be patient." This was a switch. How ironic, that Edward would be telling me to relax. "Isn't it, though?" he answered my mental thought, quietly, so the other passengers wouldn't think he was a schizo. "It's going to work out, Em. We'll find them in time."

"Nice show of confidence, bro," I muttered. "Commander Whitlock would be proud."

"I heard that," came the lazy response from across the aisle. Jasper was relaxed, how I don't know. But his tranquil state of mind was seeping through to everyone. Bella was yawning, leaning more into Edward, and Esme looked more peaceful than she had in days.

"Are you trying to sedate me?" I asked. "It's--not--" I frowned, unhappy with the waves of numbness wafting toward me. I couldn't hold out, though, and was eventually leaning far back in my seat, if not serene then calm. Bella was out. "I hate you, Jasper," I declared, but the statement didn't hold any water due to the huge pauses between words.

"We should land soon, Emmett," commented Edward, as his head dropped loosely onto the top of his seat.

"Great," I mumbled. "Maybe we'll be out of coma then."