A.N – this is basically the events of chapter one of voices from Kitty's POV. I've tried to use a style which (according to Wikipedia) is called stream of consciousness narration, and it's the first time I've used it, so it might not have worked as well as I hoped. Basically it tries to recreate the flow of thoughts as it would be at the time, rather than if it were later recalled.

This isn't as hard going as Jean's perspective, but it won't make much sense without reading the main chapter. I wanted to explore this some more, so I thought I'd include Kitty (who is my favourite character anyway). It is a lot about the relationship between them too, as well as how Jean's powers affected Kitty.

The book Kitty is reading at the beginning is Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte.

Disclaimer – I do not own the X-Men in any way, shape or form. I also do not own anything to do with Jane Eyre. I own it even less, at least with the X-Men I bought my comics and DVDs. For Jane Eyre I "borrowed" my mum's copy and put it on my bookcase rather than hers when I'd finished it.

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I want to read this book. I do want to read it, if I put it away then in five minutes I will just want to take it back out. I want to know how the story ends. Who is in the attic? Why does she hate Jane? Why...why don't I remember what has been happening in the story? Oh please, I hope I didn't just skim over that page again. Yes, I did. How many times is that now Kitty? How many times have you paid attention to the first ten words then ignored the rest of it? How many pages have you read in the last hour? I started a new chapter, so that is... five pages. You can do better than that, what's the point in starting a book if all you can do is think about Jean.

Jean. Is she still there? Yes, there she is, or at least her hair is there. I can't see her face, too many shadows, but her hair is definitely in that window. The way the sun is hitting it, it seems even brighter than usual. It looks happy. That's such a strange way to think about hair! But it does, red is just a happy colour, and Jean's hair looks so much more vibrant nowadays than her face ever does.

I'm glad I can't see her face. It would be like a statue's, stiff and unmoving. Or a corpse... NO! Don't think that. That isn't going to happen, it can't happen.

This is the real reason I can't concentrate, I guess. I've read this book quite a few times before and I know what happens. I love it, that's why I picked it out to try and distract myself, but with Jean, a book that revolves partly around the existence of an insane wife in the attic isn't all that helpful. Every mention of her just reminds me of Jean. And the mad wife doesn't get a happy ending, does she? She jumps off the roof and doesn't even get remembered by name. She is never Bertha, she is always the madwoman in the attic.

No one will say it aloud, but I know everyone suspects Jean is going mad, if it hasn't already happened. Of course, it's a different kind of madness to Bertha's. It isn't a raging mad, but it is still madness. It just isn't right! Why has this happened to Jean? She is such a good person, what could be making her act this way? Out of everyone in this whole world, why her? She is the one who always helped everyone.

When I was small if I fell, she would always come and pick me up, dust me down, no matter how much I protested. Because she knew that I needed it. She helped me as much as I ever needed it, no matter how much I pretended I was fine without help. Everyone else would either pander to me or give me too much independence. Jean always balanced it just enough so I wasn't left feeling ignored or patronised.

Mother and father are holding off as long as they can, I know, but they are going to give in soon. Uncle X is coming next week, I think if he can't help they are going to send her away. Where I don't know, but somewhere else, and I doubt it will be pleasant.

Stupid tears. Everything is blurry, even Jean's hair. Why are you doing this Jean, why won't you just get better? What made you do this, you had a great life. Lots of friends, and when you started acting oddly some stuck by you. They still ask after you, and I have no idea what to tell them. You should see the look on Scott Summers' face every time I have to mumble something about how you still feel a little under the weather. It is like something delicate he has just managed to repair has shattered. It is clichéd I know, yet I think it is his heart.

Why would you do this to all of us Jean? What have we done? It isn't fair.