A/N: First off, apologies to keeping you waiting so long. I sent my beta this chapter as well as the next chapter together. However, he ended up doing the later chapter first and this one kind of got lost in the shuffle. He did this real quick once he realized his mistake. That's why I'm able to get this one up today. The next one should be up in a couple days as well since it has already been looked at. Big thanks to TheJusta for doing this one so quickly. Any mistakes are still mine. As for the story, sorry to leave it semi-cliffy there last time. This chapter won't end with the suspense of the last one. There is also a Sarah/Chuck meeting in this one, so there is that for you guys. I loved all the reviews, so please, keep 'em coming. Standard disclaimer of me not owning Chuck still applies.
Chuck vs. The Grid
Chapter 6
July 19, 2010 Flagstaff, Arizona
Sarah and her team pulled up on the scene. There were flashing lights, ambulances, government vehicles, and tons of guys in suits. Sarah exited her SUV and instructed her team to stay seated. This wouldn't take long. She flashed her badge and started looking around for Casey. She finally saw him sitting in the back of an ambulance receiving medical treatment. She was shocked when she saw his face, two black eyes and a broken nose. Chuck had given him the raccoon look. She couldn't help but chuckle a bit.
"You've looked better, Major," Sarah said as she approached him, a small smile on her face.
"Cute, Walker. What are you doing here? This is an NSA operation."
She gave him a withering look. "We both are looking for him and this was his last known location." She looked around. "What happened?"
"That son of a bitch happened, that's what." Casey angrily sounded off. "He took out three of my men, injured about half a dozen more." Casey shook his head. "He's changed Walker. He's not the same kid from Burbank. He's cold blooded now."
Sarah stared at the ground. She felt guilty for what Chuck had become.
Casey continued, "We fed some false information to a source that would lead Bartowski here. We waited for him to show up. We never saw him arrive, so we assumed we beat him here. I guessed he would be hiding out in that building," he pointed to the only decently sized building to the north, "so we came here," Casey pointed to the building right next to them, "to set up surveillance on him. Well, he was already in there, watching that same building we were planning to watch. He must have been waiting for us to nab Orion, then he would ambush us. It was chaos when we came in there. He just started gunning down my agents, blowing out their knees. I managed to clip him and that must have pissed him off because he was taking kill shots afterwards. Three shots to the chest for each 'em." Casey was shaking his head. "He had me, Walker. I was staring down the barrel of his 9mm. He just grinned and then knocked me out. He was nice enough to call local LEO's and let them know we were injured though," Casey finished bitterly.
He paused. "Beckman has issued a termination order. She believes he's too much of a wild card now. Knows he won't work with us even if we get him."
Sarah stood still for the entire story. She couldn't believe how Chuck had become so efficient and so emotionless. She looked away, hoping that some portion of Chuck's humanity still remained intact.
"Sarah," Casey said softly, which caused her look at him, "what happened in Charlottesville? I've heard rumors but the CIA is keeping a tight lid on that one."
Sarah blanched. Evidently, they weren't keeping a tight enough lid on it. "Casey, it was the biggest mistake of my life. You know about Miami, right?" Casey nodded. "He told me to stop looking. He said he was going off grid for good. I couldn't leave it alone. I had to find him. I had to be with him, to save him. It had been ten months and there wasn't a single whisper about him." She shook her head, starting to get choked up. "I turned him into this," she said, motioning around to ambulances and body bags.
"What happened?" Casey repeated in the gentlest tone he could.
Sarah took a deep breath to steady herself and started to speak.
***
April 27, 2009 Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Chuck had been walking towards his destination for about 20 minutes. Although he hated having to leave the car so far away, he couldn't risk it being seen by Casey or Sarah. Chuck felt a sense of thrill as he approached his destination. He wasn't quite sure what it was, but it was making him feel alive, almost happy about what was going to happen. He was looking forward to some action.
Walking in the afternoon sunlight, Chuck was wearing his sunglasses with his spy backpack on. He was looking at his iPod, trying to make sure he wasn't being followed. He pulled out a GPS which told him he was just a few blocks from his target. He stopped and looked around. He saw an abandoned building about 50 feet to his left. It would be facing the left side of the warehouse where Orion was supposedly hiding. He decided he would take up a position inside. It would give him a great view of everything surrounding it. He knew the likely route that Casey and Sarah would take when they got him, so when they nabbed him Chuck could quickly move on to his final position for the ambush.
As Chuck started to cross the street, he was nearly hit by a car flying by. He looked at the license plate and flashed. It was a Fulcrum car. He watched it pull up to the building he was going to enter. He watched a woman get out, go to her trunk, and pull out a large plastic briefcase. Chuck guessed it housed a sniper rifle. Chuck looked around to make sure there weren't any more Fulcrum agents approaching before quickly following the woman into the building.
He instantly pulled out his thermal goggles and put them on. Since the building was empty, it made locating the Fulcrum agent easy. She was on the tenth floor. Chuck quickly moved just outside the room when the agent was making her sniper's nest. Chuck could hear her getting everything ready. Chuck pulled out two weapons, his tranq gun and his 9mm with silencer attached. He settled for the 9mm. He didn't want to kill the woman, but he couldn't risk being identified if Fulcrum found the agent before Sarah and Casey. He clicked off the safety and quietly opened the door.
The Fulcrum agent had the gun sitting on a table, pointing out a window. She was sitting down and looking into the scope. It was perfectly setup for the warehouse. Chuck raised the gun and put two slugs in the woman's back. Chuck grabbed her quickly before she could accidently knock over the sniper setup as she fell. He lay the woman gently on the floor and took his position in the chair. Chuck brought his eye to the scope to have a look.
He saw the warehouse. He started looking around ever so slightly. It didn't look right. The warehouse was the worst place to hole up. There was only one way in or out. He saw movement in the windows of other buildings surrounding the warehouse. 'Oh shit,' thought Chuck. 'This is a trap. Fulcrum lured them here saying Orion could be found here.' He quickly pulled out a prepaid phone to call and warn Sarah, but he saw their vehicles approach the warehouse. Deciding he had to act, he fired a round into the hood of their car as it had come to a stop just outside the warehouse entrance.
***
Casey and Sarah were getting ready to exit their SUV when the bullet hit the car. Casey gunned it and drove the SUV into the warehouse as more bullets peppered the car, some flying through the windows and nearly striking the occupants. Once inside, it was easy for them to tell it was a trap. There was no workshop or anything that Orion may have had. They had walked into a Fulcrum setup. As they exited their vehicle, they saw two more SUVs take up positions outside the warehouse and five agents spilled out of each car, one holding a grenade launcher.
"Well, this is not going to end well," Casey grunted to Sarah as they tried to fortify their surroundings for the impending attack. The rest of their team pulled out their assault rifles, waiting for the order to fire.
***
Once Chuck shot the car, the other snipers followed suit. The dead woman's radio chirped, "What the hell are you doing Alexis? You were supposed to wait until they exited their vehicles."
Chuck ignored it and started looking for the other snipers. He saw one located on the opposite side of the warehouse and took him out. Chuck watched as red filled his field of vision in the scope. He knew there was probably one facing the opening of the warehouse, but since Chuck couldn't see him, he knew he couldn't be seen as well. He focused his attention on the men exiting their vehicles.
***
Sarah and Casey knew this would end badly. They were outnumbered and pinned down. Casey quickly called for backup but it would be too late before they arrived. Their one stroke of luck had been the guy who hit their car as they were about to stop which allowed them to take shelter in the warehouse. Sarah peeked out and saw a man with a grenade launcher aiming to fire.
"Take cover!" she yelled.
They waited for the explosion. It never came. She looked back outside and saw the man lying dead on the ground, his grenade launcher in pieces. Some Fulcrum agents were firing up at a building a few blocks away. 'Someone is helping us,' she thought. 'CHUCK!'
"Casey," she yelled, "I think Chuck is here. I think he was the one who first shot at us."
"He shot at us!? I'll kill him." Casey looked livid. He never imagined Bartowski would try to kill them. He knew he wanted Orion, but he didn't think that he would ever hurt him or Sarah.
"He tipped us off, Casey, allowed us to take cover." She yelled as the bullets were starting to whiz by.
The next few minutes were chaos. Chuck was laying suppressing fire for Sarah and Casey who were carefully taking out Fulcrum agents one at a time. Sarah watched as a few Fulcrum agents' heads exploded as Chuck took them out and one of their own was gunned by a sniper. Casey had lobbed a few grenades at the Fulcrum vehicles and those who weren't already dead were blown to bits. Luckily, their backup arrived on site. The enemy sniper had been located and taken out. The remaining Fulcrum agents surrendered when they saw they were finally outmatched.
***
Chuck saw the carnage close up thanks to the scope. Body parts were lying everywhere and the pavement was covered in blood. He resisted the urge to vomit a few times. He was getting too used to the sight of blood. Normally, he would have passed out by now. When he saw the backup had arrived, he quickly gathered his gear, including the sniper rifle, and left. He knew if Sarah and Casey didn't have his position, they soon would, so he had to leave quickly.
***
Once Sarah saw the backup arrive, she quickly jumped in the SUV and drove towards where she knew Chuck was. She arrived in a flurry, nearly hitting a man with her car as she came to a stop outside the building on the sidewalk. He gave her a shocked stare, but she ignored him and went into the building to look for Chuck.
***
Chuck had just started walking down the street to the Charger when an SUV came out of nowhere and nearly hit him. He saw the blonde get quickly out of the car. 'Sarah!' He tried not to be obvious but he was shocked she had found him so quickly, so all he did was stare at her, mouth slightly open. However, she completely ignored him and rushed into the building, gun drawn. Chuck regained his senses and quickly scurried away.
He was on the road in less than ten minutes, having run back to his car. He quickly put his foot to the floor to drive away as far as possible. He knew they would put up roadblocks. He would either have to stay close or take as many back roads as possible.
***
15 minutes later, Sarah was back by the warehouse. It looked as if someone had painted the concrete red, there was so much blood everywhere. She spotted Casey talking animatedly on the phone. She quickly went up to him. He hung up the phone and looked at her, a strange expression on his face.
"So…?"
"He was gone when I got there. Looks like he stumbled upon a Fulcrum agent's sniper's nest. Chuck took her out, and then saved our asses. I think we should put roadblocks up. He's not that far ahead of us."
Casey nodded and made the appropriate phone calls. He hung up again and this time he addressed Sarah.
"General Beckman says you're reassigned. She wants this investigation run by the NSA. I'm sorry Sarah." Casey looked liked it. He started to think as he walked away from her. She was the best partner he'd ever had. This pissing match between the CIA and NSA had cost him that. He had been listening for the last ten minutes how the CIA's involvement had led them into a Fulcrum trap. The moles were in the CIA office. Blah, blah, blah. He was sure Sarah would be hearing the same story when she talked to the director of the CIA.
Sarah was shocked as she watched Casey walk away. She couldn't believe Beckman would reassign her. Just then her phone rang. "Walker, secure."
"Bennett, secure. Agent Walker, I need you to report to Langley ASAP for an emergency face to face."
"But sir, I should stay here and keep looking for Chuck." Sarah protested.
"Get here ASAP, that's an order."
***
April 28, 2009 Langley, Virginia
"Agent Walker. The CIA and NSA will no longer be working together to find the Intersect."
"But sir…" Sarah started, but was cut off by a raise of Director Bennett's hand.
"I said we will no longer be working together. I did not say that we won't be looking for him."
Sarah heaved a sigh of relief. She couldn't let Casey find him first. She had to do it. She had to save him. "Sir, I wa…"
Director Bennett interrupted. "I know you want the assignment." He paused. "Can I trust that you won't let your personal entanglement with the subject interfere with your search?"
"Sir, I want to find him. It's my fault he's in this mess to begin with."
"You are aware that when we find him, he will be trained to be a field agent?"
"What?" Sarah responded in disbelief. "He's not cut out for this work."
"Really," stated Bennett with raised eyebrows. "He took a whole Fulcrum cell in Utah, which crippled one of their streams of revenue to fund their operations. He has called in numerous tips to us. He saved you and Major Casey yesterday. And he has been able to elude both the CIA and NSA for four months. I would say he is plenty capable for this line of work."
Sarah opened her mouth to protest but found no words to contradict the director. It was true, Chuck had done extraordinary things, and with no formal training whatsoever. She did come up with an argument against field work.
"But he's too valuable for the field. He can't work alone."
"He won't be." Sarah had a knowing look on her face. "Yes, that's correct. You would be his partner. You two have worked together long enough that you are one person I feel he would be most comfortable with."
Sarah thought for a moment. Part of her was initially intrigued by the idea to go to exotic locations and work with Chuck. It would be like with Bryce, but only better because she truly loved Chuck. 'But,' she told herself, 'that's not why you love him.' She loved his kind eyes, his goofy grins and his stupid jokes. There would be none of that on missions, just Chuck always risking his life for her and likewise. They would probably be at each other's throats about it. She could never work with Chuck. She didn't want a spy's life with Chuck, she wanted a normal one. The house, the suburbs, the family. She smiled as those thoughts drifted across her mind as they tended to do when she thought of Chuck.
"Glad to see you like the idea," said Bennett with encouragement, obviously misreading her smile. "Now it is imperative we find him before the NSA. They'll stick him in a bunker and force him to do what they want. He would be wasted there. I want him. Now go and get him."
***
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
"Hey Chuck, I got some good news."
It was Roy, and he sounded happy. "It better be better than that last tip you gave me. Almost got me killed and Sarah was just inches away from capturing me." Chuck sounded bitter.
"No, it's not about Orion. The CIA and NSA are now conducting their own separate searches for you. Each thinks the other is responsible for the leak that led to the Fulcrum trap. They aren't playing nice anymore."
"That sounds like terrible news. Now I gotta worry about Sarah and Casey separately, rather than collectively."
"Why? You don't have the power of two agencies working together to find you. That should help."
Chuck laughed. "Hell, there weren't two agencies looking for me. It was just Beckman and the NSA. Sarah worked for the CIA, but the NSA was running things."
"Oh. Well, that does sound bad then."
"Thanks for the warning. I know how Casey will operate, so he will be easy to avoid. Sarah's a different story. I don't know what to expect from her. All I know is it will be outside the norm."
Roy, sensing Chuck's doubt, interjected, "Look, you don't have to find Orion. Just stay off the grid. It may not be the life you wanted, but it damn sure beats the life you're living."
"No," Chuck added with steely reserve, "I want this fucking thing out."
"Okay, Chuck. I'll call whenever I get word. Lily sends her best regards and says to stay safe."
"I will. If I ever back up your way, I'll stop by. Bye Roy."
***
June 14, 2009 Miami, Florida
"Goddamn it! This is really starting to piss me the hell off," Chuck angrily spouted as he climbed out a window of a three story house. He tied some bed sheets together and made a serviceable rope as he quickly rappelled down to the ground from the third floor.
He had just left six dead bodies back inside. It was another Fulcrum cell. Someone was leading him to these places but he had no idea who. That was the third Fulcrum cell he encountered where Orion had appeared on the radar. Could Beckman be playing him? Just having him do all the grunt work and letting Casey take the credit. 'Seems like the kind of thing she would do, the hag,' Chuck thought viciously. Roy didn't seem the type to mess with him. Nothing in Chuck's flashes on the agents indicated any type of double or triple agent status. So who was leading him to these places and why?
He was packing up his things and was getting ready to leave when he heard someone approach. He was sure he wiped out the entire cell. Chuck hid behind some bushes and prepared his tranq gun. Chuck was ready for some answers and whoever was approaching may have some. He put on his thermal goggles and watched as the person entered the house through a side window. 'Must be Casey, making sure I did a good job.'
***
Sarah Walker crept along the side of the house. She had an uneasy feeling someone was watching her, but couldn't see anyone. She jimmied the window open, pulled out her gun, and made her way in. There were two bodies in the room she had entered, both dead with gunshot wounds to the head. 'He's already been here.' She did a quick sweep of the house. Like all the others, Chuck had a take no prisoner mentality. He just wiped everyone out. Then he would call, say who they were and what they did, then leave the phone for the NSA or CIA to track. She opened the front door and stepped out of the house when she felt a prick on her neck. She saw a figure approach as she fell unconscious.
***
'Time to get some answers,' thought Chuck triumphantly as he made his way to his victim. When he saw who it was, his heart sank. 'Sarah, what are you doing here?' A little agitated that he knocked Sarah out, he quickly scooped her up and looked for her car. He used the electronic locking system on her keys to locate it. Unsurprisingly, he found it parked near his. He allowed himself a small smile. They were now thinking alike.
He put her in the passenger seat of his car and started to rifle through her car. He found the card key for her hotel room. 'Always the best,' he thought as her hotel was that of the rich. 'Guess it beats slumming it in dirty motels with even dirtier clientele that I've been living in.' He gathered up her things and placed them in the car.
He drove over to her hotel and parked at the back. The hotel card said room 1020. He grabbed Sarah and started to carry her towards the back door. Once inside, he quickly found the stairs. He started the long walk up ten stories with Sarah cradled in his arms. After ten minutes, Chuck had worked up a good sweat but had made it successfully into her room. He laid her on the bed while going though his pockets to make sure he had the proper equipment. He then left the room to get the rest of her things.
***
When Sarah woke up, she found herself bound to a chair in a dark room. She looked around trying to see where she was. Her legs and arms were bound to each arm and leg of the chair. As if that wasn't enough, someone had tied her waist the back of the chair and her thighs to the seat of chair. She struggled but it was useless. It was then she noticed she was in her underwear and her favorite nightshirt, the Stanford tee she took from Chuck.
"I'm going to turn on the light, so ready your eyes," came a familiar voice.
She half closed her eyes and said softly, "Chuck?" The light came on. She was in her bedroom, placed in front of her bed.
She let her eyes adjust and when she finally had them completely open, she saw a smiling man in front of her. He looked familiar. She had seen him somewhere. The short hair, the beard, the sunglasses.
"I'm hurt you don't recognize me, or at least this version of me." He was still smiling.
Her eyes opened wide as realization hit her. "Chuck, it's you. You were the one I almost hit in Oklahoma City."
Chuck's smile grew even wider and he allowed himself a small chuckle. "Yes, that was me." He took the sunglasses off so he could meet her gaze. They still had that sparkle they had back in Burbank. Seeing her had momentarily made him forget all he had done and still had to do.
She struggled against her binds. "Isn't this a little extreme?" She had a small grin on her face. She wasn't sure what he planning on doing to her. Being bound suggested nothing good.
"For super agent Sarah Walker, I knew I had to be extra careful. Sorry I undressed you to your skivvies, but I know how well you hide your weapons, and well. Like I said, I had to be extra careful."
She didn't care about that. A part of her was a little excited that Chuck had went over almost every inch of her, closely examining her body.
"Still in great shape I see," Chuck added. "And not a scratch on you. I must say, for all you have done, that's quite an accomplishment." His smile didn't quite match his eyes.
"Chuck, please let me go. I promise I won't do anything." She didn't know what she would do, but she never liked being out of control and Chuck was definitely in control.
Chuck gave yet another smile, but it was nowhere near genuine.
"I'm afraid I can't do that. I need some answers and I think you can help me."
She swallowed. There was no way he was doing what it sounded like he was going to do. "You're going to torture me?" She was scared that Chuck would even consider it, but she had seen him like this before. He was in full Carmichael mode.
"Oh, heavens no. I know torture is worthless on you. You are too well trained. Plus, I could never do that to you. Is that really what you think of me?" He paused for dramatic effect. "I'm not a sadist. I just want to ask you questions and hopefully you will answer them."
He moved behind her and took a seat on the bed. He placed his hands on her shoulders and she tensed. "Really Sarah, I frighten you that much?" He was somewhat surprised by her actions.
"You're not the same person that left me in Burbank."
"You are probably right," Chuck added truthfully. "I don't know if he exists anymore."
He started massaging her shoulders and neck. She couldn't help but moan at his touch. It was wonderful, just like Burbank. Chuck was smiling. "Why were you here tonight?"
Sarah's eyes were closed as she was enjoying Chuck's touch. It felt so calming, so right. "I was looking for Orion. Our latest intel put him here."
Chuck frowned, but continued working her on her traps. "You don't find it suspicious that every Orion lead turns out to be just a Fulcrum cell?"
"Well, I never really, oh, a little lower and to the left…yeah, right there, thought about it. That does seem strange. You think someone is feeding us misinformation to take out Fulcrum cells?"
"That would be my assumption. Hmmm, this doesn't make any sense. Who could be doing this?"
"I don't know. It's not us. We don't know much about Fulcrum's operations. Neither does the NSA."
"Then that must mean it's…" 'Orion,' Chuck finished in his head. That would explain it. Roy had said something about Fulcrum building their own Intersect. They would need Orion to help finish it. He was using them to take out Fulcrum and get them off his tail.
"What, Chuck?" Sarah asked lazily, still enjoying the massage.
"Oh, nothing." He continued to massage her back. He heaved a sigh. "I really miss this, even if it was just a cover."
Sarah's eyes opened. Chuck had just taken her back to Burbank, his couch, to when things were the way they were supposed to be. It felt wonderful. He had completely disarmed her. He could always break through her barriers but now he had managed it with just a massage. 'How pathetic am I?' she thought viciously.
Chuck felt her tense up again. "You know, if want me to work these knots out, you need to relax."
"Chuck stop. I know what you're doing. You're making me feel comfortable. Making me feel like we're back in Burbank. It's not going to work anymore."
Chuck stopped and spun her chair around so he was facing her. She looked angry and he was smiling. "Still, was that the best interrogation ever or what?"
Sarah couldn't help but grin at him. No matter what he did, she would always love him. This had convinced her of that.
"Chuck, please, untie me."
He shook his head. "Afraid I can't do that. There are still a few things I would like to know." Her eyes narrowed. "Don't worry, not spy related."
She sensed his demeanor change as he finished his statement. This wasn't about his search, it was about something more personal.
"Fine, shoot?"
"Has my sister married Awesome yet?" She didn't say anything. "Come on, I know you're watching her every more even though I'm gone." She noticed a bit of displeasure at the invasion of his sister's privacy.
"Yes, they got married." Chuck smiled a sad smile. He missed her terribly and had missed the biggest day of her life. 'Goddamn Intersect.' Sarah continued, "She's also pregnant."
"What?" Chuck went bug eyed. "I'm going to be an Uncle?" He was so excited he wanted to jump up and down on the bed.
"No, you aren't," Sarah said brutally, "You won't go back. You won't be part of that kid's life in any way, shape, or form."
Chuck's momentary happiness was extinguished by Sarah's comment. He gave her a hard glare before sadly adding, "Probably better off without me. I'd only bring trouble."
"Chuck, please, untie me. I can bring you in. The CIA doesn't want you in a bunker. They'll let you stay a free man."
"Free?" Chuck asked skeptically. "What does my freedom entail exactly?"
"They want you to be an agent. You would work with me until we find out how to get the Intersect out."
Chuck rolled his eyes. "Well, although we would eventually sleep together, I think I'll pass."
Sarah was hurt by Chuck's comment. Angrily, she yelled, "Chuck, what can I do to make you realize that I love you? That I want what's best you? What? Tell me!"
Chuck stared at her for a moment. "Find me when this is all over. Tell me all this when I am just Chuck, not the Intersect." He went to grab another tranquilizer. It was getting too difficult to talk to her. He didn't trust himself to deny her requests when she was making claims like that.
Sarah saw him move over to his things. "Please, Chuck, please don't do this. Work with me. We can do this together."
"Sarah," Chuck stated forcefully as he turned her back around to face him, "You really think they are going to let me go? You really think that they care about me?"
"I do, Chuck. Don't you see that? Let me help you."
Chuck was getting frustrated. "Dammit Sarah! I can't trust you." Sarah was taken aback. Her eyes started to water over. 'Chuck doesn't love me anymore,' she thought sadly. 'I waited too long and now look what he has become.'
"See, this is exactly what I mean. How can I trust the tears when I've seen them used as part of a mission? How can I believe your emotions are real when I see you fake them all the time? Tell me how I can trust you."
Tears were falling down her cheeks. "I don't know, Chuck. I just know that I love you and want to help you." She started crying harder. It started breaking through Chuck's resolve a little.
"Here," he said. He set a box of tissues on her lap. Then he grabbed a pair scissors to cut an arm tie. "Don't try anything." He clipped the tie and backed away. She took the tissue and started wiping away the tears. She didn't even think about trying to free herself, not that Chuck would have let her. He was still holding a tranq dart.
Chuck stood there and watched her. It was horrible to see her like that. He'd never felt so sorry in all his life. Even if it all was a ruse, he hated being the source of someone's tears, especially Sarah's. He shook his head. He would never find Orion. Orion was sending him to do his bidding, just like all the others before him. He was done with it, done with it all.
Chuck pulled up a chair so that they were sitting face to face. He wanted to study her face, her smell, everything. It was the last time that it would be more than just a memory. He took a hand and ran it across her cheek. She looked up, eyes still watery. He smiled when he looked at those blue orbs. He had been hers since day one, of that he was convinced. Then he took her hand in his. He would want to remember her soft touch, how lovely it was. His eyes were starting to water. Chuck knew he would have to move soon, otherwise he would never be able leave Sarah.
Sarah saw the change in his demeanor and became worried. "Chuck, what are you doing?" She sounded scared.
"Just taking in your breathtaking beauty one last time," Chuck answered, not looking away.
She knew that it did not mean her end, just his. "Chuck, no, no, no. Don't, please don't."
"It's time for Chuck Bartowski to be no more. Just let him go."
Sarah started crying again. "Chuck, please…" she sobbed, "I lo.."
Chuck leaned in and kissed her. She used her free hand to grab his head and pull him in tight, never wanting to let go. Chuck was enjoying the feel of her lips on his for one last time. He slowly moved his hand forward and gently stuck the tranq dart into her thigh. She broke the kiss and had a look in her eyes like he just killed her. Chuck's eyes were closed. He couldn't look at her.
"I love you Sarah."
"Chu…" Sarah mumbled before she allowed the darkness to envelop her.
***
June 15, 2009 Miami, Florida
Sarah awoke sometime in the middle of the night. She was in her bed, hand placed under the pillow holding her gun. She quickly turned on the light at the nightstand. She found a bottle of water and a piece of paper waiting for her.
Sarah,
Sorry about the tranqing, twice. The water's for the inevitable dry mouth that accompanies such extensive drugging. I brought your car back to the hotel so you wouldn't have to get it later. I'm not great with a manual transmission, but I don't think I stripped the gears too badly.
Sarah, just please let me go. Move on. Be happy. Start the rest of your life.
Sarah started crying again as she read the note for a second time. She was left with a dull ache in her gut. He still loved her. He said he did. 'Why won't he let me love him?' she thought angrily. They were both broken souls now. Sarah had always been broken, but Chuck had healed her somewhat. Now Chuck was broken and only she could fix him, if he would let her. It was as if fate wanted them both to be miserable.
Sarah decided she would oblige Chuck's wish. She would let him go. She would request another assignment and focus on something else, anything else. She would try to fall out of love with him. But for the rest of the morning, she would go on grieving the loss of Chuck Bartowski from her life.
***
August 2, 2009 Charlottesville, Virginia
Chuck was sitting in a mall food court, silently eating a couple of slices of pizza. He watched all the happy people milling around, joking and smiling with family and friends. His choice to go permanently off grid voided Chuck the possibility of those. Roy had been very supportive of his decision. Roy said that his brother had a place over his bar where Chuck could stay. It was small and very few people knew about it.
His thoughts turned to Sarah. He wondered whether she was still looking for him or if she had decided to move on. He prayed she would because this dance they had been playing was too emotionally crippling. He hoped she would one day be happy. Even though he was doomed to isolation and misery, she deserved happiness, no matter her faults.
He had finished up his pizza and just sat there. He wondered what Casey had been doing. Probably getting his ass chewed by Beckman. Chuck allowed himself a small smile. Casey was a decent man. He wasn't much on feelings, but he was loyal and Chuck knew that Casey and he were friends, whether Casey admitted it or not.
His thoughts then turned to Ellie. He missed her so much. She was married and was going to have a baby. She had a proper family now. She deserved it. They had been through so much. First their mom, then their dad, and now him. He knew Devon would never abandon Ellie. He smiled again. Then there was Morgan. He wasn't sure how his little buddy had handled his running. Morgan had gotten him through the worst of it with his dad and then Jill. Morgan had Anna, so he would be okay, but it still hurt not to be able just to sit and game with him.
He looked down at his watch. It was a little early to hit up a bar, even if he wasn't going to drink. 'Why did I come here?' he asked himself. He thought that being around people would make him happy. He had been alone for so long that he felt he needed to connect to people, even if it was on this superficial level. But it just made things worse. They all had what he wanted, but he knew he would never have. It just made him depressed. He needed to leave.
As he gathered his things, an attractive brunette with short hair took the chair opposite to him and heaved a huge sigh. She didn't even notice Chuck. He eyed her nervously, but nothing triggered a flash. He tried to quietly get up, but the chair moved, causing his table mate to look at him.
Her brown eyes went wide with embarrassment. "I'm so sorry about this. I didn't even notice you. I'm just so exhausted. Been taking my daughter back to school shopping. Getting it out of the way early, you know. It's been a long day."
Chuck gave her a small smile. "That's quite alright. I was just leaving anyway."
She eyed him closely. His smile seemed sincere, but his eyes told her something else. She couldn't quite put her finger on it. She took in his full appearance for the first time. He was decently attractive, she thought. There was something off with him though. He didn't look like he was supposed to.
"Oh, don't leave on account of me being here. Please, stay. My daughter is having lunch with a couple of her friends. I wouldn't mind company until she is done."
Chuck considered for a moment. He probably should have just left right then, gotten out of that woman's life before he ruined it, but he hadn't spoken a word to anyone in almost three weeks. Chuck wanted just to be able to talk to someone, even if it was just for five minutes. Chuck sat back down and the brunette's smile got wider.
"I'm Kristin," she said, extending her hand.
"I'm Chuck," he replied, taking her hand and shaking it.