That weekend I went to visit Jake.
He was waiting for me, right outside the front of his house like always, because he heard my truck from a mile off.
He smiled a sleepy smile as I climbed out of the cabin; I wondered if I'd woken him up.
"Heya, Bella!"
He stifled a massive yawn, and grinned apologetically.
"Been patrolling all night?" I asked.
"Yup. Caught a fresh leech trail out near the east of the border."
"Oh, really?" I said, like I didn't know who it was.
"Uh-huh. It wasn't that red-head one that's been hanging around, it was different. Weird, huh? Maybe she's got some new cronies."
"Jake-"
"Yeah?"
"I know who it was."
"The leech?!"
"Yeah."
Awkward pause.
"Well?" he asked me.
And then I told him.
I told him how I'd heard His voice like I did when I was doing dangerous things, except I'd been all alone in bed, tucked in nice and safe and sound, and I'd sat up, and He was there. And how He just looked at me, like it was ok to come in through my window in the middle of the night and watch me sleep, twelve months after telling me He didn't love me and leaving me to grow old and die all by myself.
Then I told Jake how angry it had made me, how I'd have snapped His neck if I thought I had a chance, and how I'd yelled at Him to get the fuck out, and how He gave me this Look, and it broke my heart all over again, with that one stupid look, like He was completely heartbroken, and then He climbed out the window and was gone.
And Jake listened, and he hugged me when I started crying, and told me he was going to kill the bastard, and that only made me cry more, because the thought of Him getting hurt made me hurt, and the fact that it did made me hurt even more, because He'd left me and I still cared about Him, and I wish I didn't.
God, I wished so hard I could just hate Him and be done with it, that I'd be able to move on and go and love somebody else like I'd loved Him.
--
The monster ran all the way to Bella's house from the airport, leaving Alice behind with his quick running.
Her window was open, and- oh god, he could smell her blood from here, and it was so good- and he scaled her wall and was through her window just like that.
And he crept silently towards her bed, he could see her throat, deathly pale in the moonlight, and he could see her chest rising and falling in the even, deep breaths of a sleeper.
The monster was so close, he could have reached out and touched her, and I could hear what he was about to do, but I was trapped like a fly in a thick glass cup, and I couldn't escape and he leant over her, slowing down, savouring the moment, and drew back his- no, they were mine, my lips, over my teeth, leaning over my Bella, ready to bite.
And there was nothing I could do about it.