A/N: I am updating today because number one, I might have to do a stupid essay for English over the weekend (probably...XP) and number two, I had a "meh" day at school. So, I guess I'm trying to cheer myself up here. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. Here, Xion discusses the insane, easily angered ways of our...um, let's call him a friend...Xaldin. XD

Disclaimer: Seriously, do you think I own KH? I would be a gazillion miles from both my school and hometown if that happened. Not to mention I'd be a teen Bill Gates, which is totally unrealistic. Yeah, I don't own anything financially substantial here. OK.

Chapter 3: Xaldin the One Who Might Need Anger Management

Oh God, don't get me started on Xaldin! He is crazy. And by crazy, I mean virtually insane. He knows how to inject fear into us, even if hearts for us are out of reach. Definitely the silent yet angry type of man; that's the worst anger there is. Yes, Xaldin can act all calm and composed...but mess with him, and you're dead as a doorknob. I discovered this undeniable fact the hard way. Needless to say, I imply that the way in which I found out was rather agonizing. It all started on a lazy Friday afternoon. Skimming through the fridge in the kitchen, I saw that the last of the Jell-O pudding had been eaten.

"Damn you, Demyx, and your childish needs," I groaned, slamming the door. Dissatisfied, I trudged from the kitchen to transport myself to the library.

As usual, Zexion sat at his customary table in the library, poring over a book. I rolled my eyes witnessing this proof of his lame, anti-social attitude.

"I know reading is awesome and all," I sneered at him as I sauntered over to him, "but you need to get a life, Zex."

His head shot up so quickly, I barely saw the movement but whatever. I had to pick on him due to the near joy I took by calling him by his nickname. He hates that.

"Number Fourteen," he coldly addressed me.

Completely turning my back to him as I searched for a book, I asked, "Yeah?"

That irksome smirk popped onto his weird-looking face. "I suggest you grow up."

"Pfft, whatever," I responded, waving a dismissive hand just as an irritated Xaldin came onto the scene. Though he barely showed it, the twitch of one of his indigo eyes proved that he was somewhat testy. With what, no one knew; he has this mysterious aura about him that none of us can penetrate. So, Xaldin huffily strode over to Zexion and me and pounded his fist on Zexion's table.

"What's the problem, Xal?" I inquired, flipping absentmindedly through the pages of the book I picked.

Xaldin didn't waste any time in getting his point across, for he took his fury out on me by grabbing me by my robe collar. Unfortunately, I have to say that Zexion seemed rather amused by this.

"Number Fourteen," the creepy dreadlocked man roared, "did you eat my onion rings?!? They were supposed to be mine!"

Grinning sheepishly, I giggled out nervously, "Well, Xaldin, they were very tempting and very tasty. I couldn't help it."

Pow came his fist on my face, which definitely stung. And guess what? Zexion chuckled and, darn it, his laugh sounded extremely musical!

Don't worry, though. I redeemed myself by beating his ass later.

Yeah, as I said, don't mess with Xaldin. Things can only end horribly if you do, even if you only snack on his delectably mild onion rings. His anger can reach such extremes that you would practically have to run for cover. The rest of the time, when anger doesn't consume him, he does sadistic things. He plays with the Beast's emotions at the castle for fun, definitely a revolting sort of character. Despite how vile he is, Larxene outmatches him with sadism, even though she was once nice to me. Yeah, don't ask.

Xaldin has no nice bone in his body; he oozes cruel and hateful and mean. I don't understand why he ranks third until I see him in battle. He is downright vicious when it comes to combat, almost as if he dreads losing. So, I'm assuming that him being Number Three just eats away at him. To prove to himself that he thinks himself better than his number, he trains every day with his ever sharpened lances. I have yet to see anyone emerge from the arena and not be soaked with blood. Even Xigbar, one of the best fighters of Organization XIII, complains of sore wounds after he trains with Xaldin. Hmm, makes me wonder if the guy spiraled into insanity as a Somebody—he battles that fiercely and has such a take-no-prisoners attitude.

I fought him once, and that was enough, believe me. Xaldin challenged me after the onion ring incident, which had caused me to roll my eyes and share an inside joke with Axel. The redhead happened to be in the living room while I watched TV, craving to watch a random cooking show.

"Do you ever stop thinking about food?" he asked, rolling his emerald eyes.

"Nope. Hey, Axe, you won't believe this, but Xaldy challenged me to fight him just because I ate his onion rings."

He snorted disdainfully at this. "Humph! He's insane."

"My thoughts exactly!" I exclaimed, and we laughed companionably.

The joke didn't last long, though; I shook in my boots when I espied the deadly lances.

I couldn't believe that Xaldin was more than willing to kill me due to the theft of irresistible snacks that he could have just gone to a market and bought. But, really, he is quite unreasonable when anger strikes him. Like I said, he's crazy. If that doesn't mean anything to you, well, so be it. Just hope that Xaldin doesn't randomly pop up into your house one night and accuse you of bothering him, the weirdo. Unsure, I took out Kingdom Key, which I flipped around like a baton to demonstrate my awesome skills. In my past life, I think, I wielded a bow staff.

"So, Number Fourteen," Xaldin snarled, telepathically forcing his lances to float around like hovering ballet dancers, "are you prepared for the worst?"

He was trying to sound like a menacing villain from a superhero movie, which amused me, despite his skills. I quickly assumed that he spent too much time watching movies on pay-per-view, a really bad habit to obtain.

So, I just donned my familiar smirk and quipped, "Sure, if the worst is getting impaled by your lances aka torture devices, then I'm ready, man."

I'm good at that, sounding more confident than my thoughts say otherwise. These self-conscious thoughts that have the possibility of deterring me are my weaknesses, proof that I am indeed a teenage girl.

Before I knew it, the lances that Xaldin controlled darted toward my chest, but they did not strike true. I ensured this by slashing my Keyblade through the air, sending the lances crashing down to the ground. Leaping toward him, I struck him in the chest with enough force to set him back. However, he summoned his weapons to the air again and gathered them, so that they circled me. And boy did that hurt! Bam, bam, bam, they came in succession, piercing me a little each time. I stopped this by using the same method as before. This time, though, I wore him out by moving and attacking rapidly.

Weapons clinked with clashing, I sent a high kick to Xaldin, and he retaliated by riding his dragon of hurt. I knew that I was pretty much screwed at that point. Once he gets the dragon out, say goodbye to any chance of winning. But I tried, though, I really did. Sadly, I found that I needed to sharpen my battling skills once I collapsed. At least I didn't black out, though I still sensed blood pouring from everywhere in my body. So, limping weakly to Xaldin, I told him, "Fine, you win! I...won't...eat your...onion rings...ever...again."

He looked smug when I gave my declaration between gasps, as if he had predicted he would win all along. I expected Zexion to give me such a look, though I can beat him easily.

"Number Fourteen, you have learned your lesson," he announced in his raspy, silky voice. "Perhaps you will never pilfer my food ever again."

I glared at him before teleporting to the infirmary, where Vexen once again had to reluctantly call upon Marluxia to shove cure leaves down my throat.

"You need to look after yourself better, Xion," he muttered irritably while I still coughed from the sudden obstruction in my throat. "Will you ever learn?"

I smiled wryly. "No, Marly, I don't think I ever will."

A/N: Yes, I decided to have Xion have a zest for food. This is partially my fault (or maybe not XD), because I'm addicted to Top Chef and love to eat. I'm even taking a class at school called Foods for gosh sakes! XDD Also, I thought it'd be cool if Xion had a rival to bounce her sarcasm off of, and Zexion happens to be the lucky guy. After all, what is anime (or animeish video games) without rivalries--random ones at that? XD

Review. It's good for the soul, but I can't guarentee that it will lower your cholesterol. Sorry.