A/N: Finally, I get to torture--ahem, Xion gets to torture--Saix today, WOOT! Thank you, everyone, for being so kind in your reviews, which have been pretty consistent. It seems like the stories I don't expect to become this huge become the most popular projects I've ever done. Who knew? Anyway, another quick thing I will mention: this story tends to jump around in the overall timeline of its plot. So, don't expect to see any more Xion/Zexion...for now. Just enjoy the randomness before I get to the mushy stuff again, OK? XD

Disclaimer: I don't own a thing.

Chapter 7: Saix the Wolfman Whacko

Ah, yes, I now turn my thoughts to the moon worshipper, the man whom I suspect of being a wolfman, and the truly insane....Saix, Number Seven the Luna Diviner. I despise this guy more than anyone else. He acts hoity-toity simply due to the fact that Xemnas treats him like the second-in-command. Apparently, Xig is too much of a slacker in the Superior's eyes. I guess Saix is the inwardly crazed guy who, oddly enough, gets the job done expertly. Seriously, I often think he's on the happy pills, if you get my drift.

And no wonder...he talks to Kingdom Hearts. That's right, the freaking moon! I'm not sure who's crazier: him or Xemnas. To me, they're neck in neck right now.

Sure, Kingdom Hearts is supposedly destined to be our savior in this near future, but it's not like talking to it is going to get it done any faster. This moon is not related to flowers, which supposedly grow more quickly if you're talking to them (note to self: Marly is also on the same happy pills). I guess those two like seeking closure from all this heart stress. Even if it means talking to a celestial body and treating it like it's your cat or something.

I swear whenever I walk by Saix, I glimpse this glitter of madness in his eyes, as though he contemplates killing me. I'm guessing he was a mass murderer in his past life. Wouldn't put it past somebody so calm that the façade can trick you; most serial killers pretend they're calm, you know. It's part of the act until they strike. Presuming that that is probably Saix's fighting style, I intend to avoid him at all costs. For, just about anything can set him off and put him on edge. I often wonder what he would be like if he carried a knife around at all times. He seems like the paranoid type anyway. Saix also has blue hair and elf ears, which cause Axel and me to call him "Twinkle Fairy." Seriously, the only things he's missing are a magic wand and a tutu. And if he was the Tooth Fairy, he would yank teeth out of innocent kids like it was no one's business.

I guess you can see where this is going: Saix has absolutely no friends. He prefers to scare people off, except Larxene who isn't easy to frighten. In fact, I think he has a crush on her, though she would rather enjoy the company of Marluxia. Saix, in the mean time, will have to suffer. If he could suffer, that is; he's the most heartless one out of all of us, if that makes sense. It probably doesn't, but he's definitely not a friendly guy. The Sup—I mean, Xemnas, seems to find that admirable in a second-in-command. Thus, he has Saix follow him around all the time like a trained puppy (and I called him a werewolf earlier, ha-ha). Yes, puns indeed male the world go round. And the cheeses, the oranges, and the grapes—come on, I needed to place a food reference here!

Well, whatever, I think I have described the cruelty of Saix long enough. Now, it is time to speak of an occasion in which I have seen that released rage for myself. And it is not a pretty sight, especially if you're the cause of it. In fact...I dare you to guess who managed to compel him to snap. Yep, it was me. As aforementioned, I can hardly resist irritating others. But why, oh why, did I have to annoy Saix? What illegal substance did I smoke? OK, none, but I did commit a serious error in annoying the heck out of that guy.

Once upon a time, I watched television during a well-deserved break.

Zexion and I had gone to Monstro (ugh!) with Axel and Roxas. Of course, Zexion ended up enraged toward the other two young men due to their "childish antics." My partner, uptight as always, likes to rant about stuff like that. I have the urge to tell him to lighten up, but that's like telling a tree to talk. You wouldn't do that, now would you?

Anyway, I watched this channel I am enraptured with avidly, my elbows resting on my bed. A knock on the door aroused my attention and somewhat irked me.

"Is that you, Axel? Quit invading my room, dude!" I shouted irritably due to my hatred of being interrupted doing anything at any time.

The rude intruder wouldn't even allow me the few seconds it took to open a lousy door, for he stepped calmly inside. Too calm, I assumed.

"Number Fourteen," Saix addressed me in his uppity, I'm-better-than-you-can-ever-hope-to-be tone, "you have committed a wrong I must put to rights."

What a clever way of putting that. Well, if he meant that charming prank I pulled that morning, then I guess he would have his revenge. After all, Saix isn't one who likes forgiving anyone.

"You bet I pulled that prank on you," I bragged even before he mentioned it.

Surprise didn't come to his face, which was only to be anticipated. He usually possesses a tendency to figure out an enemy's objective, so that he can enact his little vendettas.

He didn't say anything for a while, though crossed his arms in a somewhat too complacent manner. I wasn't lying earlier when I said his calm was practically deadly. If his feigned placidity could kill, we would all be dead right now. It wouldn't even spare Xemnas.

Finally, Saix talked to me again. "So it was you who turned my underwear pink."

I stifled a giggle by pretending to cough instead. "Yep, sure did!"

For this prank, I had gone with the classic washing whites with a red sock one. And whoever invented that concept was a genius—a mad one at that.

It was my turn to do the laundry that morning; luckily, I knew which load belonged to Saix. The idiot actually wrote his name on the waistbands on his briefs! What surprised me regarding this was simply how Axel couldn't see what he could have done. He could have basked in the current glory I held dear to me. Anyway, I return to this tale of mine, one filled with mischievous wickedness on my part. However, my glee was doomed to end badly from the start, for I noted that Saix's right eye twitched.

This wasn't a particularly good sign to say the least. It implied that Saix would erupt into insane fury in just a few short seconds.

He commenced rubbing the bridge of his nose repeatedly, as though I was giving him a colossal headache. Which, really, I probably was; I tend to have that effect on people.

"Why must you be so bold as to degrade me like this?" he asked, though it came out more like a growl similar to that of an irritated, provoked lion. Briefly, I pondered over the decision that suggested I should toss him a hunk of raw meat. It could satisfy his often insatiable appetite, which almost outmatched mine.

"Dude, they're just undies. It's not like everybody here will see them."

I knew I was wrong the second I replied with this smart-alecky retort. Laundry duty did get passed around every week. A shame that I forgot to acknowledge that.

"They will eventually," Saix stated through gritted, way too sharp teeth.

I swear that a werewolf must have bitten him a while back, for he seethed with rage now. His chest heaved in an up-down motion, his eyes taking on that vicious, possessed glint. Those eyes were beginning to alter into a dark shade of gold, almost brown. I can't even lie about that.

"Come on, it was just an expression of impish child innocence. Cut me some slack, Saix. I mean, people won't laugh...much."

That did it right there. Actually, it was several things—one, the reference to children, two, the fact the fact I called him by name (and not title), and three, that last comment.

Guess where I wound up? Uh-huh, I awakened in the infirmary, where I discovered bruises and cuts decorating me like military badges. Except for the fact that getting totaled by anybody isn't a heroic accomplishment—try an act of sheer idiocy. Marluxia wearily trudged toward my bedside to treat my wounds with a special, magical ointment that smelled like Xig's feet. You don't even want to know what they smell like.

"I actually don't like you that much, Marly," I commented on my situation.

"It doesn't seem to be turning out that way, does it?" he muttered roughly. "Just stop putting yourself in these predicaments."

"You know I can't do that." I flashed him a grin, but he turned away, inevitably disgusted at my childishness.

A/N: Ah, Marluxia always seems to disapprove of Xion's constant hospital visits, doesn't he? Don't worry, though--he will get his punishment. XDDD Also, I always thought that Saix could be considered a werewolf, thus the chapter title.

Speaking of which, a special KH Halloween fic I wrote this time last year will come on here October 31st. Keep an eye out for it. XD