A.N.: Thank you all for reading this. And to 3ninjasfan and Hayashi, thank you for the reviews. These are the very last chapters maybe there will be an epilog, I don't know but if you ever get the time go to youtube and listen to these two songs after reading this and just think about it hahaha. I think you'll really like it; the songs are "Thank you for hearing me" by Sinead O'Conner, and "Beautiful" by Darren Hayes. Enjoy the chapter.
...
Michael "Tum Tum" Douglas, sat quietly in his bedroom; wishing like hell he had a rope of Twizzler or a pack of Skittles or something sweet to suck down as he sits alone in the darkness thinking about his brother, Rocky. Since that terrible Christmas last year, he hasn't heard a word from him. Just from his brother's boyfriend, Robbie. Robbie says that Rocky is doing all right, though, he refuses to speak to anyone - - even him!
It's weird, still... Weird to actually put the words together, and out in the open: Rocky's boyfriend. Tum Tum knows that his older brother never intended for things to turn out like this; everyone's broken and angry because of Colt and his anger. Rocky would have explained it; Rocky would have helped them understand and see his situation for what it is. But his brother never got the chance, he only got the ambush. That's what Tum Tum called it: "The ambush".
His second brother timed it perfectly; and counted down the seconds as Rocky and their mother met up in the kitchen - as they did every Christmas morning. The feeling of the room just grew darker and angrier after Rocky had left. Their mother wept and mumbled bitterly with her husband; who was slamming things, shouting anything he said; and counting moments where he should have known that something was wrong.
Tum Tum found that to be the odd part, since Rocky hadn't shown any signs of being a homosexual until now. Maria Balsam kept coming up; and soon his mother began saying things like: "I should have been a better mother" and "I should have loved him more".
Colt, on the other hand, was mute through their parents verbal slaughtering of their first son - up until their father asked him how long he had known, and what all does he know? At which point Colt joined in on the shooting of a blind-folded, deaf man, who - if he could hear them - would know that his place in the family will forever have a burn on it. And the cinder just continued growing into an inferno with every insult.
It's been a month. And during that month the house has grown into odd cold silences, where it was once filled with happy greetings of good morning or how was your day. Because of that, Tum Tum realized something very powerful. Rocky was their world. If Colt had messed up, they'd be embarrassed and chalk it up to experimenting; they would tell him that he needed to keep it out of the house. And he, Tum Tum, is invisible. Oh sure their parents adore them and love them each the same, but their expectations of that love are divided into certain catagories.
Colt was the lovable screw up; the one who gives them a chance to prove to their other two children how deep their love can go. Tum Tum was the boy who can raise himself, to show the other two that they have a certain independance while still being very tucked in and loved in open arms. And from that, was Rocky. Rocky was perfect. He's the example to them of what happens out of their love. He's the one that, to his brothers, has been there and done all that was wrong, and independantly made the right choices from their guidance and now lives the examplatory life of the perfection.
Perfection can no longer be looked at to make mistakes. Perfect can't stray from the crowded guidance of his independance; the shock is too great; the raw disblief is too much to be handled without a toe being eased gently into water first. But it happend. And what's left from that was a cold silence that detaches all parties from normal existance.
Tum Tum has had enough! He had to do something to get their family back together. Although, he isn't sure what. Sitting up, he pushed the blanket from himself, getting out of bed. 'I hate thinking on an empty stomach.' Wandering downstairs, he headed into the kitchen, pulling out a sealed container full of the leftover macaroni and cheese from the other day. Venting the lid he then shoved it into the microwave, and turned it on to a setting that will cook it through without it needing to go for round two once its been test stirred.
He then took a seat at the island counter and waited for the ready beeps. Running a hand through his hair; he laid his arm across the countertop, resting the side of his head on them. 'What can I do? What can I say? ...Should I do something awful that will make this look small in comparison?' He shook his head a bit. "That's a dumb idea."
"Tum tum?" His mother called from the living room.
"It's me, Mom. I'm just getting a late night snack."
Late night, it's only nine o'clock - that's how dead the house has become. You have dinner, then the rest of day seems unreal. He could go out; a few times he has gone out of the house, but for some reason when he leaves he feels a wave of nausia rush through him. It's like something else was going to happen in his absence. He has to watch them. He has to watch all of them. He just doesn't understand how the people he loves and cares about can become so un-recognizeable in such a short amount of time. Maybe the whole Douglas family was guilty of giving unrealistic images to one another, and the let-down would never be easy. But still...
"Come in here, please. Come sit with me." She asked.
Glancing at the microwave, still whirling his food about; Tum Tum let out an exhausted sigh and got up from the stool he's seated on, walking into the living room. Jessica is seated on the couch; her green bathrobe on, covering up her pink pajamas. She has a book on her lap; Tum Tum recognized it as the photo album. He took a seat beside his mother; she guided his cheek to her shoulder, by her hand pressing him down onto to it.
The two sat quietly for a moment or three. Nearly three minutes, since the microwave announced that Tum Tum's snack was done after the three minutes he'd put it on. The thick pages of the album were slowly turned, until finally he couldn't take watching the still memories flip past his vision.
"Mom, can I talk to you?"
"Of course, Tum Tum. What is it?"
His fingertips played on the thread of his nightpants as if to draw courage from the many strands; Tum Tum sighed softly. "It's about Rocky, and what happened over Christmas."
"I don't want to discuss your brother, Michael."
'Uh-oh, given names.' He lowered his gaze to the book. "At least you're still acknowledging that he's related to us." Flipping the book closed on a picture of them at a barbecue at the park that stared up at him with blind, inanimate, eyes; Tum Tum looked up at his mother. "Why can't we talk about Rocky? Are we all just supposed to ignore that blond guy in a lot of the photos; and make like the person that lived here was just some foreign exchange student?" Defiantly he declared. "Because I won't do it - and if you are telling me to do that, then that months worth of sleepless nights is only going to get worse, because I'm scared to believe that you can think like that, mom. ...I won't let you do this to him - - or us."
His mother's eyes filled up with the tears from Christmas to now, and they spilled over. Her tears stopped flowing for her oldest son, but now that they're going again. Its unclear as to whether or not they'll ever stop.
"I've been awake and scared every night that Rocky will never come through that door again; that if he does you and dad will throw him out instantly - - you won't even give him the courtesy of an arguement because, for you, he's just over... I don't want for Rocky to just be over."
Brown eyes filled with sadness, she looked at her youngest child. "You don't know how your father and I feel, we..."
Cutting her off, he says in a clipped tone. "How you feel? Then tell me how you feel." Sitting up, back more erect, as he has to twist himself a bit to look at her. "Do you feel sick? Do you feel angry? Because so what - - I feel lost. Like I'm gonna slip away from everyone, because I can't take the fear and pressure behind being measured in perfection; knowing what's gonna happen when I screw up..."
His mother had been shaking her head as he spoke. "No, no baby, you won't screw up."
"Won't I?" He stood from the couch as if he planned to flee should his mother lunge at him; yet, he felt fearless in his own fear of getting this whole situation off his chest. "Paige and I had sex! We could have just dove into it, and I could have gotten her pregnant - - but I didn't. I was careful, because I know better - - not because you taught me."
His mother looked up at him speechless by this discovery. Her youngest boy had sex?
"Just because you instruct someone on how to live a good life, it doesn't mean that they're going to apply it for that reason. No one wants to be hurt, and no one wants to be scared. So we protect ourselves from pain the best we can. ...Rocky would have told you when he thought the time was right. Except he couldn't, because Colt stole it from him. Mom, I hate this." He felt his strength crumble; he sank back onto the seat; allowing his tears to flow rather than wiping them away.
"You love Paige, sweetie. And, even though this is a serious matter - - it's not the same thing as with your brother."
"Oh? Doesn't Rocky love Robbie? I've seen them together, mom... I've seen first hand how much Robbie cares for him. I admit that it startled me that for the first time I was seeing my brother for who he was inside. I noticed because I see that in me anytime I'm with Paige; or when I come home from a crappy day and you're here to cheer me up by simply sitting with. I recognize when people are happy, mom; and because of Robbie, Rocky is." Touching her shoulder as though he could transfer his feelings into his mother, he then asked. "So, how is it different?"
"We've raised you boys better than this."
"We're good people, mom. You guys did a fantastic job - - why can't you see that?"
"No. Samuel is not good. He's not himself... He's confused."
Tum Tum scoffed at that. "Is that what you're telling yourself? Is that really what you want to believe?"
"Michael, please, no more."
"Why? Because it's starting to not make sense that you would condem your first born because he's confused?"
Wiping her eyes, she shook her head and sobbed out. "It's every parents worst nightmare that their child will grow up wrong."
Wide-eyed, Tum Tum got up from the couch, again, backing slowly away from as if a snake were sitting there ready to strike. "...Right. What was I thinking to question you. I'm sorry." He headed for the kitchen. "You were right to throw out that chain-smoking, crack addicted, womanizing, public masturbating, theif of a son because he had decided to get his life back together - - and be gay." He held his hands up defensively. "Sorry I bothered you."
Tum Tum walked to the microwave, grabbing his food then a fork, and the salt shaker on his way past the drawer for utensils; the salt had been left out on the counter after dinner. Passing through the living room was rough; he wanted to comfort his mother's tears, but he couldn't. He stood beside his feelings and what he'd said. His brother wasn't worth being hated for a while. He's been there for him through a lot of things, and has noticed him when other people seemed to not. He loves Rocky. And nothing new about him will change the guy that his brother is.
0 0 0
Robbie checked his digital watch for the seventh time since arriving at the library. He figured he'd study through his lover's absence. Where better than a public place with dozens of witnesses. After what had happened to him between Darren and the guy's friends, Robbie was very skittish about being alone, fearing that that horrible night will happen again. Try as he might, he hated every second of it, and wished like anything it didn't happen - - or even something small like the nightmares truly going away would be a great help.
'I should call him.'
"Hey Ballerini." Called a familiar voice beside Robbie, who was leaning to reach inside his backpack.
"This is new. What's up?" He sneered the best he could. "You hooked on me after only one time, or are you here to tap my shoulder for a friend that wants me to know he has a little crush?" He laughed.
Humoring him with a laugh, Darren continued to loom over the nervous - though mouthy - Canadian as he spoke. "No, I came to tell you that I'm sorry for what we did... before..."
"Ohhh, you're sorry. For what was it now? Stepping on my foot? Cutting me in line at the cafeteria?" He turned in his seat. "Because there's no way you're using: "I'm sorry" to apologize for a dog-pile rape."
Fidgety in his shame; Darren thought it would be an easy thing. He apologizes, Robbie being Robbie - or what limited knowledge he actually knows about the guy - he would accept it, and leave the matter alone. But this is what he received... bitterness.
"...Sorry is all I've got."
"No. It's not good enough." He shook his head. "I mean, you obviously don't know what it feels like to be raped. It's not something I'm used to, it's not rough fucking sex... When you rape somebody you have something that you share intimately with someone defiled just because some sicko took it from you forcefully..." He felt hot, angry tears lurking in the background. "And now anytime I close my eyes I feel scared; anytime my boyfriend helps me undress for that romantic act, I want to pull my pants back up." He paused when seeing Darren visibly wince at those words. "He'll kiss me, and for a brief second I'll have this intense urge to bite his tongue off... And when we hold each other close... I'll move into him, and have to remind myself of who I'm with, so that I don't end up ramming into him with the intention of hurting him as badly as I was hurt!" Robbie's hand, once flat on the table, scrunches into a fist. "And you think: "I'm sorry" can just make it go away like waving a wand... You're right, though, you are sorry. And until I think of a way for you to make up for what you did.. A way that you can show me that you're truly hurt and sickened with yourself about what you did - all of you - leave my sight."
Darren stood there a moment, truly embarrassed and at a loss for words. He thought that it was just sex. Don't gay people fuck up the butt anyway? Shouldn't he have hardly felt it? Unless he's a virgin... Darren's face changed as he thought about that. He thought about what Rocky had told him; the things that had happened to his once rival when he was a child, and then only last year was sick and wrong. It hurt Darren to know things like that from such a blunt point of view.
Rocky told him that he scraped every day just to get by without having a flashback of what happened to him. If he'd of known any of that beforehand, he never would have touched Robbie - not in that way. Darren had to wonder where the hell his common sense went, to even think to do that to someone in the first place? If not for Robbie, said Rocky, he would have made them unrecognizable ages ago. Even when they were complete asses to him, the Canadian had protected them simply because he hates violence. And they did what they did to him.
Cocking a brow while growing very uncomfortable with Darren's just standing and staring over his head, Robbie asked. "Are you done?"
Blinking, the reforming thug shrugged. "Listen, I'm having a party at a hotel, tomorrow night... If you wanna, you can come. It'll be me and some of the guys, and some girls - you can bring Douglas, if you want."
Robbie paled at the invite. "I'll think about it." He replied softly.
"Look, it's not a trick - - would I have told you to bring your bodyguard, if it was?"
"Guess not... You should work on your people skills a bit more." He smiled. "I'll go to your party. Thanks for the invite."
"Yeah." He smiled seeing that the battered Canadian had initiated it. Maybe his conscious will be cleared after all. "See ya."
Robbie only watched as Darren left the library; his held breath blowing from his mouth. "Scary guy." Retrieving his phone, as he'd originally planned to, he called Rocky's phone.
"Hello?" Rocky answered.
"Hey, what happened to you? I've been looking all over the school, then I check the lot and your car is gone."
"I'm going somewhere."
"Where are you going?"
"To my grandpa's... I don't know if he got the message or not about me... so I thought it'd be better if I could explain things for myself to at least one person in my family."
"You couldn't have brought me along?" Robbie gathered his things; fearing the night - regardless Darren's half-baked apology.
"I don't know. My grandpa's a ninja - - if he doesn't take it well..." He trails off.
"Say no more." He swallowed hard at the thought of being kicked through the window of the man's home.
"I'll be back tomorrow - - ten days, right?"
"Yeah." He headed for the exit. "But where will you go after that?" He sighed in deflation. "I just wish you would take me up on my offer."
"I'll be fine, don't worry about me. I'm great at thinking on my toes."
"...Alright, but remember.. we can still escape from this place, and live the life." He smiled hearing his lover's laugh.
"We'll see. Don't forget to lock the door tonight."
"Okay." Snapping his fingers he, added. "Guess what just happened to me?"
"What?"
"Darren Whittle, your arch enemy - - and now mine - - apologized for raping me."
"You're kidding?"
"No. He came right up to me and said he was sorry. I, of course, gave him a massively hard time about it, but, I don't know; I sorta don't have any kind of torture in mind. So, I'll let it slide."
"Believe me, I could think of a few things - - but I won't; too much time invested in thinking about Darren."
"Yeah. You could be thinking about me."
"Uh-huh." He says humoring him.
"I love you."
"I love you more." He replied.
"I loved you first," He can almost see Rocky's eyes rolling.
"You'll love me last if you keep that up." He teased.
"Sorry; when it comes to the love competition first come, first place."
"Hahaha, in the words of my dad: you are so the woman in this relationship."
Pushing the door open, he laughed as he scouted the area. "I'll take that. Have a safe trip; and, hope it goes well. Bye."
"Bye." They hang up.
0 0 0
Rocky's car pulled up before his grandfather's cabin. All he has to do now is get out of the car, walk the footbridge, and go inside and tell him everything. He can remember a conversation similar to the one he's dreading right now from playing 'What if..'.
What if he liked Robbie? What if he loved and wanted to date him...? 'What if' has always been life's little safe game and scape-goat for any wrong doings you've either done or planned to do. But when the questioned-question plays itself out... tunes change. But, he asked Tum tum what he had thought about him being gay - - or at least gay for Robbie - - and he was on the fence. But, he turned out to actually not mind it. They even kissed infront of him! Much to Paige's squealing delight; and he didn't so much as bat a lash or whip out a gross.
Grandpa will be the same. He loves him. He always has and always will, no matter what. Rocky just realized that he was gripping the wheel so hard his knuckles have whitened then turned pinkish red; releasing the Kung-Fu grip, he let out a sigh then opened the door of his car.
"Get it together, Rock'; just be honest and clear about it. He'll understand." On terror-frozen legs, he paced over to his grandfather's home.
The cabin where he's spent many summers doing ninja, since he could walk and talk. A friendly, inviting, place where he can let down his guard and be comfortable. But he thought that very thing about his home... and look how Christmas had gone. Hn. He never would have guessed he'd even see another Christmas, after spending last year's with a mad woman. Boy wasn't that fun; Maria's idea of Christmas presents was a horrible dinner, with zombies - for as lively as the other captives had been; sitting around listening to Christmas music and watching one movie - Rudolf the Red-nose Reign Deer; it was more awkward than it needed to be because she had been mentally speaking throughout the entire film about what an ass Santa and the other deers were for hating Rudolf for being different. That reminded her that Rocky had a gift; and a good life - regardless this gift - after which she'd spent the night beating him while he lay cuffed to her bed. Then, once he'd passed out, she took it upon herself to suck him to erection, then take a ride on his lap. He hated everyday that he'd allowed himself to feel the pain she'd caused him; he had been strong enough to stop her, and yet he did nothing but allow his own body and spirit to be broken like glass returning to the sand it had once been. But he could beat her, and he can beat this. He won't chicken out.
Knocking on the door; through a large window, he spotted his grandfather in the kitchen pouring a glass of milk.
The elderly man smiled when seeing his grandson at the door, waving a hand to him. That was Mori's favorite part of the boys being older, they could stop by to see him anytime they liked! And it's always a nice surprise to come home and find the boys at the cabin cooking a meal for him; or just hanging out around the house doing nice things for him. Mori wondered if he could get help moving the furniture about? Pushing the door open he pats his grandson on the shoulder.
"Rocky, it's great to see you. What are you doing here?" He handed him the glass of milk then gone into the kitchen to pour another one for himself.
Rocky, though steered into the livingroom, remained silent and still, once he was left to stand. He can fill tears running down his cheeks at the thought of bursting his grandfather's happy bubble.
"How's the family? I'd meant to be their over Christmas but... I couldn't get out of bed; this darn hip has been acting up." He took a seat.
"Grandpa... I came because I have something to tell you... But you may not like it."
Concern showed on his aging face, further at the idea something dire had happened over Christmas. "What is it?"
Sitting down, clucthing the glass as though it were a shield that would protect him if need be; he wet his lips then said. "I'm in love with someone grandpa, but you may not like who it is..." He verbally sobbed then, wishing that he wasn't but the tears and choking sounds refuse to stop.
Relieved, the man patted his grandson's knee. "It's Ivan, isn't it?"
"Then mom told you?"
"Your mother hasn't told me anything."
Rocky had to wonder why that was, but then he realized that cut-out means cut-out. No two-ways about it.
"I could tell it was love by the way you'd talked about him; you had a light in your eyes that you only see when you're in love with someone - - like me with Angelica Huston."
Rocky sniffled through a laugh. He remembered how his grandfather often watched the woman's movies with a certain sparkle in his eyes. But still, it was weird thinking about older people still having feelings like younger people - - immature thought or not - - it remained true, for most people.
"When did you acknowledge it?" Mori pressed the conversation. His grandson was hurting, and need of a good moment to derail any bad.
"Over the summer; he snapped me out of worries and self-doubting, my fears... He just laughed and loved me - - even when I pushed him away, and called him this and that. I thought that I hated him becuase Marissa was his aunt, but it didn't stay that way for long. He helped me clear my mind the old-fashioned way." Blushing, he said shyly. "Forget I said that."
The man laughed. "Enough said."
"Grandpa... I've been having such a hard time being with him, though. The guys at school beat him up nearly everyday because of me; Colt hates me - - really hates me, to the point of us fist fighting in front of everyone on campus. And just when I thought I'd shut them all up, that bastard Darren Whittle and his friends gang raped Robbie - - on Colt's order!"
Mori Shintaro could not believe his ears! Colt, his Colt? The spirited, wild one, would order for someone to do something like that to his brother - - just because he couldn't understand that he's gay? It's.. it's just unbelievable! "Are you sure it was him?" If anyone, he thought a free-spirit like Colt would be the first to understand, might even confess to his own youthful curiosity. But...
Nodding, Rocky explained about what he'd said to Darren, and how the jerk took it. "Grandpa, Colt told mom and she went nuts.. and then dad found out while she had been yelling at me, and... it all happened over Christmas. It was a nightmare." He sighed heavily. "I haven't seen them since, not mom, dad, or Colt. Tum Tum is the only one who talks to me, but, I just couldn't talk to him - - not yet, but... I had to come and tell you for myself, before it could get tainted again by someone throwing it around all wrong. I'm not gay, but I love Robbie. And it doesn't feel like its changing at all, even though I'm losing everything around me."
"Well, rest assured, you're not losing me anytime soon. I'll speak with your mother for a start - - your father might be another story. No father wants to hear something like that about their son. Colt, though, I'm just so surprised at him.. but I'll speak with him, as well."
Feeling his breath return to him Rocky smiled. "Would you really?"
"Of course!"
Setting down the glass he hugged the man tightly, receiving a hug in return. "Thank you. Thank you so much. I just... I'm getting so tired; and I don't know how much fight I have left in me, grandpa; my granite is crumpling down around me."
"Rocky..." He laughed. "Your granite isn't crumpling; when I named you Rocky, I told you that you were strong, solid, cool as grainite rock. I meant every word - - and it still stands before me." He held his grandson back a ways to look at him. "You're strong in body and mind. You can overcome anything. Solid when you take bad news, and make examples of ways to handle it - - good or bad - - you face it instead of running. Cool as granite because on the outside you're untouchable, hard, but inside you're tender and soft, you can be sculpted. The battle may get tough, but your rock will never crumble."
Laughing, he sat down beside his beloved grandfather. "I wish I could believe that as you do."
"You do; otherwise, you wouldn't be here to tell it to me on your own."
Wiping his face, Rocky nodded. "Y'know, I always hated crying... but, lately, it seems like that's all I can do."
The elderly man snickered. "I know those days."
Rocky steadied his breaths; it happened so quickly, almost eagerly for him that he really was feeling much better. "I have a favor to ask you, though, my room is no longer being paid for at school.. and I found a job, but, I need somewhere to stay. I'll pay you rent, and help out - - anything you need. It may take a while, though."
"I won't hear of it. You'll wear yourself thin with expenses." He patted Rocky's knee. "You're my grandson; you'll stay here as long you need, no charge."
"Thank you, grandpa."
"Anytime. Now, about this Robbie thing... I want a proper introduction - - I wanna set the fear of a ninja into him."
Rocky laughed about that. "Robbie won't be easy to intimidate; he laughs about everything." He smiled faintly. "I hate it, though.. it's because of that I know he feels the pain the most... I wanna get into him about that, and stay there. But I only get brief encounters with his pain, but I like to think that when I'm there... I'm repairing him, the way he repairs me."
"I'll bet you do. If he can put on a brave face, as you say he can, then you're all the healing he needs. He can overcome anything - - you can overcome anything with healthy, good, love."
Hugging him with one arm around the wide shoulders, he says. "And you'll always give that to me, too, grandpa."
"You bet, now, it's getting late. You go set up the futon upstairs and get some rest; it's a school night."
Rolling his eyes, he smiled as he does as he's told.
"And you'll help me move the couches around tomorrow, after you bring your boyfriend over."
"Okay."
"Good night, Rocky."
"Night, grandpa." He disappeared around the spiral stairs.
Drinking his glass of milk, Mori put Rocky's in the refridgerator. He couldn't believe the behavior of his daughter - or Colt. He's seen better from the young man than to be aggressively angry towards his brother, over something that's really none of his business in the first place. It's time he talked some sense into this family, before things got any worse.
...
"Your grandfather wants me over for dinner?" Robbie asked, as if hearing the sentence had him wondering if he'd heard Rocky wrong.
"Yeah. He doesn't care that you and I are together; he's happy for us."
"Awesome." He took another bite of his ham sandwich. The two are sitting in the quad having lunch. "Do I have to behave a certain way?"
"No. Just be yourself." Holding out his sandwich to the brunet, Rocky asked. "Trade one?"
Taking the sandwich, he passed his other half over.
"Do you know where you're gonna stay after ten days?"
"My grampa's. I asked him, and he'd like for me to stay - - free of charge to my guilt-ridden conscious."
"What's to be guilty over, he loves you."
"I know. But, hey, I might get a job working at a bar which means I can keep paying for school."
"That's good. Where's the bar, maybe I can stop in sometime."
"Heat Wave."
Robbie nearly choked on his bite. "That club Sin used to visit? Are you nuts? What if some creep tries something with you?"
Cocking a brow at the show of concern, Rocky gave his boyfriend a peck on the forehead. "I'm a ninja, Robbie, no mere man can stop these flying kicks and fist; plus, I'm a telekinetic hazard. If my ninja won't stop them, that will."
"Cocky bastard." He elbowed said bastard on the side. "When do you start work?"
"Whenever Andre calls me back and tells me, his boss wants to give me a test run."
"Mm. And whooom is this Andre?"
"Why so nervous about whom this Andre is? He's just a friend of Sin's; he helped him out, when he went to the club."
"Oh."
"You remember?"
"Barely... I'm going to a party tonight."
"Really? When?"
"I don't know; Darren invited me after his apology." He brushed crumbs from his hands and fingers. "Do you think I should go?"
"It's not my decision." Rocky replied. "Do you want to go?"
"I don't know. I feel like I do, but then... I'd rather spend the night with you."
He nodded through the swallowing of a bite then says when his mouth is empty. "So spend the night with me."
"Won't be much fun since we'll be at your grandfather's."
Rocky snickered, as he finishes chewing the last bite of his lunch. "Then go to the party, you dork. I won't miss you."
"You'll miss me. You don't have a choice - - the Ballerini tattoo is not an easy one to wash off."
"Ha! You always admit that yours can be washed off; the Douglas tattoo stays on tough, and no laser can remove its powerful mark."
"Wah, wah, wah." He smiled. "I've got classes. See you tonight, my dearest love."
"Mhm. Bye."
Rocky received a wave in return. He's about to get up when his phone rings. He thought it was Andre until he saw the caller I.D. Smiling, he flipped the phone open and says. "Hello, Arc."
"Do you know it's me, daddy?"
"Yes, I do. How are you?"
"I'm fine, I'm gonna have a brithday party, remember to come."
Rocky could have been in the world's deepest depression, and it would have been destroyed completely due to receiving the invite to his son's birthday party. "I'd love to. I wouldn't miss it. Do you have anything specific that you'd like as a gift?"
"Uh-uh. I'm gonna be five, I haven't seen much stuff."
Rocky laughed quietly. "I'll think of something really good, something that big old five year olds would love."
"Thank you, daddy. Are you sure you can come?"
"Yup. I'll clear my whole schedule for you."
"Daddy? Are you all right, you didn't call me all January... I thought that you might be lost."
Rocky sighed quietly. He hadn't meant to shut off completely, it just sort of happened. "I'm sorry. I kind of was lost for a while, but, no more missed calls to you. I'm feeling much better now, thank you."
"That's good; I'm feeling much better, too - - I got the sniffles last week."
"Aaaw. I'm glad you're all right now."
"Me, too."
"Arc, I have a class right now, but I'll call you later on, okay? You can talk to your great grandfather again. I'm staying at his house."
"Yippee! I got a present from him, too, on Christmas. I can thank him."
"He'd like that."
"Did you like my present?"
Rocky had forgotten he'd left his house without his presents; he wondered if they had gotten thrown away? His parents wouldn't do that, no matter how angry they are at him. It's probably just a matter of going to pick them up. "I loved it, thank you very much."
"You're welcome. Bye bye, be smart in school."
"You, too. Bye." He waits for Arc to hang up in-case he had something more to say.
Closing his phone, he pushed the door open to the hall walking through to his class, which is the first room on the left. Going home... maybe he should call first. See if Tum Tum is there. Or maybe his little brother can just meet him at the park, and drop them off. He can only hope that his grandfather can talk some sense into his parents and Colt. He doesn't really like his battles fought for him. But he'll make an acception this time. Speaking of his, former, brother Rocky spotted him sitting in his seat in a classroom. He only glanced at him before moving to a seat across the room.
Colt noticed his brother's entrance, and stood up walking over to where Rocky was seated.
"Rocky, I wanna talk to you." He sat down in the empty seat beside him.
"About what?" He was never able to fully master ignoring his loved ones - - no matter how much he loathed them, at the moment. If only he could apply his 'shutting off' towards loathing, that way no one important gets unintentional silent treatment. He's only ever 'shut off' twice in his entire 21 years of living: when Paula's mind snapped, and now that his family has disowned him.
"About this whole thing with Robbie."
"This thing you're referring to is our relationship." He informed his brother.
"Right. I just... thought that I'd say that I'll stop being an ass. I mean, it was wrong of me to just come down on you, without fully understanding you."
Turning his dual-colored gaze on his brother, eyes full of wonder and curiosity. Does Colt really understand him, will he back off and let them be? Apologize even? "You understand?"
"Yeah. You see, I've been thinking about you, and all the girls that you've dated over time.." Colt tapped his palm with the back of his other hand, as he laid out his theory. "And when I thought about that, it became obvious why you think you like Robbie."
Raising a brow, he asked. "Why I think I like him?"
"Think about it. Paula, Carmen, Jo - - well, you had a thing for Jo, but didn't date her. But, also, Talisa, and Marisol." Seeing that his brother didn't follow, he continued explaining. "They're all exotic - foreign; the only exception being Emily, and you kind of dated her because she was the first girl you ever knew."
That had to be the most amusing thing that Rocky has ever heard. If he weren't so incredibly insulted by the accussation, he'd of laughed hard enough to pop a lung. "And how does Robbie fit into this equation?"
"He's a guy. That's the most exotic and foreign thing your unknown fetish has come across; so, of course, you're infatuated with him - not only that, but he's technically a foreigner - since he's Canadian."
Sighing through his nose, he retorted in a bland tone. "And if I tell you that you may be right, will you stop being a jackass?"
Colt's posture sagged, and his eyes lowered to the desk. "About that... it was really shitty of me to just rat you out the way I did, but, I don't know... something inside of me just wanted to win for a change."
"Win what?"
"At being the favorite; getting mom and dad's love and attention - without having to strive for it."
"Colt..."
Cutting him off, he goes on to say. "You know, I went from admiring you to outright..." He blushed a bit. "kind of having ill-will towards you."
"Colt, you don't have to compete with me, because there is no contest. I'm not the way I am for any reason other than that's me, and I can't help it - just like how you can't help the way that you are. If you think mom and dad love you differently for it, then that's really something to take out on them - not me. It's unfair in the long run to become underhanded and cruel, trying to hurt someone who's unaware of it. It's sick."
"I know. Robbie told me."
Rocky found that odd. His outgoing lover never mentioned speaking with Colt. "Colt, I love Robbie. And not for the reasons you said, but because he's a really good person, and I like being with him." Spotting the instructor, he turned his attention forward.
"...A...are we all right?"
"If you want to be."
"I do."
"You'll have to accept Robbie, though, because he and I aren't splitting up for any reason but our own."
Colt was silent. "I just... I just don't know if I'm ready for that, though."
"Hn. You can have me, but if we're going to be cool... then you have to lay off Robbie, I mean it. No insults under the table, no hiring idiots to beat him up nor you; just please stop all of it."
"...I have to think about it."
"Then we have nothing more to say until then."
"Right." Returning to his seat he looked back at his brother, unsure of what to do anymore. If Rocky plans to stay gay, then he can't want him back. He sure missed him though.
