Disclaimer: (I OWN TWILIGHT...if only it was true)

i've got a couple chapters written for you guys...so yay for the end of writersblock!
yeah, so the following chapters will be pretty sad
-sorry-
the depressive stuff is about to ensue...but don't worry, the comic relief will come in a couple chapters :)

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Leah

Jacob dropped his smile and brought the much needed serious atmosphere into the room. Something that had been lacking for a long time. I had some questions and I wanted some answers. Finally he spoke.

"What do you want to know about Leah?" In my head I had a silent victory dance. I had finally won! Stopping the personal celebration I asked my first question.

"I want to know what just happened in the garage". At first he didn't seem like he was going to answer until he broke his stare.

"She imprinted on Mike". Sitting on the couch I fell back into the cushion. My hair puffed out in front of my face, hiding my surprise. Once I got my senses I opened my mouth.

"Leah imprinted on Mike!" I knew what he said, but I just didn't believe it! Leah, the werewolf bitch queen had imprinted on Mike, the annoying boy who worked at the local supermarket! Jacob grabbed my hands and held them firmly.

"It happens to the best of us Bella". A small smirk took his face. "I didn't expect it to happen. Neither did Leah". My jaw dropped.

"You didn't expect to imprint on me?" Very quickly Jacobs grin turned into a frown.

"That is not what I meant", he paused for a second. "I've dreamed of imprinting on you for a long time. Believe me, if I could have sooner I would have". That made my insides turn to fluff. Jacob truly had been devoted to me for a long time. Even when he wasn't mystically in love with me, he had wished he was. Werewolves made love into something much more confusing than normal love. They made it in the best form of the word, official. I brought my jaw back to its normal place and smiled, letting a small breath escape my lips.

"Oh"

"Bella, imprinting is some weird business. We don't even know how it really works. We just know that once it happens there is nothing else but that one person. Nothing else matters". I loved to hear him say this, but I needed to know more about Leah.

"Yesterday Leah came to me in the shower". Instantly his eyebrows rose and a giant smirk invaded his face.

"You and Leah took a shower. Together?"

"NO!" I punched him on the leg. "She came in to talk to me!" Giving up on his little joke he sat in await for me to continue. "She wanted to tell me that she didn't hate me. That there was nothing personal about it, but she just didn't like me". He didn't seem to get the point.

"Wait. Leah doesn't hate you?". A small glare formed on my face.

"Is that so hard to believe?". He ran a hand through his hair and laughed.

"Well yeah". Ignoring his comment I continued.

"I was wondering what she meant by it was nothing personal?" Jacob leaned into the couch and let out a huff of air.

"Bella, she loves Mike. Just because she imprinted on him doesn't mean he's going to imprint on her". Then I understood. Leah was worried that Mike wouldn't imprint on her. That she would yet again be on the absent side of love. Love without return. Just what she had had with Sam. She was worried that maybe her hate for me was holding her back. Just then I felt bad for her. Who could live knowing that the person you loved didn't love you back? Stuck in a pit of darkness all by yourself? Then Jacob laughed. I didn't like it, he was laughing while Leah was hurting. It just felt wrong.

"Wouldn't it be funny if he imprinted on you!" With that my jaw dropped. I hadn't even thought of that. All the signs were there. He'd always been hopelessly drooling over me and somehow he knew when I was in the garage even when everyone else stood in front of me. He had looked past Leah to say hello to me. His liking for me had become something more than a crush. It had become something possibly more official. What if he had imprinted on me?! I didn't know what to think. Apparently Jacob noticed my freak out because I soon found his arms holding me down.

"Are you okay Bells? I was just joking, it's not like he'd actually imprint on you". Turning my gaze to his I spoke.

"What if he did?" Then a serious tone smoothed over Jake. Instantly his hands formed balls and his eyes hardened. "I mean it's not like he can choose who he imprints on".

"No"

"No what?"

"No, he won't imprint on you"

"But Jake-". He took a hold of my hands and pulled me to him.

"You. Are. Mine.", he huffed through his teeth. Unsure of what to do I chose to push myself back. Why had Jacob become so possessive? Didn't he understand that he was my one and only someone like I was his? Didn't he know that his imprint had worked both ways? I was just as connected to him as he was connected to me. Then it hit me. A sharp pain jabbed in my stomach and instantly I felt the need to heave. If I was feeling this connected to Jacob, then how would I feel if Mike imprinted on me? Would my feelings change? Could they? Incoherent mumbles started to spill from my mouth.

"No Jacob. No. No. No. No." I couldn't! I wouldn't allow this to happen! Life had just gotten livable and now Mike Newton was screwing it up! That stupid boy with his stupid hair and his stupid grin. I hated him. I absolutely hated Mike Newton. Tightening his grip around me, I could feel the start of Jacobs convulses. Looking into his eyes I could see that he wouldn't last much longer.

"Bella-"

"Go Jacob". His face scrunched up and his eyes seemed to have turned pitch black. I took his hand in mine. "Just be quick". With that he tore himself off the couch and sprinted through the door. Looking through the window I could see just the end of his transformation. If I had been able to phase I would have too. What had just happened ruined everything. And even though nothing had actually happened yet, the possibly still lingered. An evil, terrible possibility. I would not love Mike Newton. I just wouldn't.

…

Twenty minutes had passed and Jacob was still running. I couldn't blame him, he hadn't phased in two days. Sometimes I wished I was the one who could turn into a wolf at a whim. He must have felt so free. No matter how much the thought of Mike made me sick I couldn't stop my eyes from looking over at the garage. Just behind that small blue door sat the reason for what had just happened. He had ruined everything. A rumble from my stomach interrupted my thoughts. Standing up from the couch I decided it was time for some lunch. Maybe I'd surprise Jacob with something good to eat. Soon after opening one of the cupboards I remembered that I could not cook anything with what was there. A box of spaghetti, a jar of molasses and a bag of chocolate chips probably wouldn't mix too well. Reluctantly opening the fridge I pulled out a loaf of bread and a jar of jelly. I guess PB&J would have to do. Slowly turning my head I could see the small blue door outside the window. Why did it keep catching my eye? Without a second thought I dropped the bread and headed for the door. If Mike was going to ruin everything then I was going to ruin him. Once I stood outside the door I stopped for a moment to decide whether or not I actually wanted to go in there. What if he already imprinted one me? Pulling at the door, I swung it open. To hell with logic, I was mad. The sound of my footsteps echoed in my ears. In the corner sat the lump of a figure I'd been fuming about. As soon as he realized who was intruding on him a smile broke his face.

"Bella!"

"Shut up Mike!" With my explosion his lips curled into a low frown. Clearly he hadn't expected me to be in such a temper. Thinking back on it, I guess it was the first time he'd really seen me angry. But he was in my world now, things were bound to surprise him. I grabbed a chair and pulled it in front of him. Never taking my gaze off him as I sat down. The feeling of revulsion took over my stomach. Just the sight of him made me want to puke. I hated him and everything he stood for. Everything he could change. After a few moments of staring he spoke up.

"Bella, I-"

"No Mike, don't talk". Running a hand across my face I continued. "You must know by now that Leah imprinted on you. And because of this things have gotten…out of hand. You were once my friend so I won't just throw you to the dogs, but", and with this I leaned in close to his face, "if you mess up what me and Jacob have I will personally make you wish you never lived". His eyes bugged out of his head. "Got it?" Shifting in discomfort he answered.

"We aren't friends Bella?" Sitting back in shock, I didn't even hear the door open. Bursting through the opening a tall tan girl burst into the garage.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Instantly turning in my chair I caught a full view of Leah's mangled face. I'd never seen her so mad. All of a sudden I found myself against the wall with Leah's arm at my throat. I could hear Mike pull at his chains.

"What the fuck Bella! Sam said to stay out of the garage!" Trying to catch enough oxygen to speak I managed to spit out a few words.

"Leah I-". Then I saw Jacob fly through the open door and attack her. Shock flew through her eyes as she bounced off the floor. Without her to hold me up my feet hit the floor, crumpling me into a heap. Once I was able to look up all I could see was two very pissed off werewolves going at it. Well not werewolves yet, but pretty darn close. If they didn't end this soon then Leah would be out of a pretty nice pair of jeans.

"DAMMIT LEAH!" He pulled off from her, causing her to fall to the floor. "Where do you get off attacking Bella!" She steadied herself and brushed off her jeans.

"It was her own damn fault! Sam said not to come in here and she came in anyway!" Jacob circled over to stand in front of me.

"Then why are you here?" She seemed to have caught the flaw in her plan because the excuses started to spill.

"I have my reasons", she spat through her teeth. Jacob rose in volume.

"Just because you imprinted on the freak doesn't mean you're an exception to the rules!" Just then Mike tried to scoot his chair around so he could see the current argument. I turned from my view from Leah to watch him. For some reason his expression was one of confusion. Apparently he hadn't seen them fight before. He started to speak.

"Excuse me, but what the hell is imprinting?" Both Leah and Jacob shot their heads back to look at Mike. Both of them kind of surprised to hear his voice. Jacob spoke first.

"What?"

Mike repeated his question. "What is imprinting?" With that Jacob turned to Leah with a small smirk on the corner of his mouth.

"You haven't told him yet?" Leah flew a hand through her hair and ran a hand down her face.

"No". Still Mike carried a face of confusion. He asked again.

"Imprinting?" Jacob turned to me and motioned for me to get up. Obeying I got to my feet and crossed the room. As I walked past Mike I noticed that he was more in the dark than I had been. Leah hadn't even told him yet. He didn't even know anything about imprinting. For a small instant I actually felt bad for him. He'd been thrown into this life just like Jake had been. Unwillingly. Jacob took my hand and we walked out the door. He shut it and turned to me.

"She's going to explain some things to him. I figured they could use some privacy". I nodded, understanding exactly what he meant while he continued to lead me towards the house. Then he stopped. "Lets go somewhere". My eyes questioned his statement.

"Where?" He grabbed my hand and started to lead us to my truck.

"I don't know. Just anywhere but here." Then I paused for a moment, stopping Jacob from his lead.

"Actually Jake, could I go somewhere alone?" Contemplation caught his eyes. I could tell that he was torn with this statement. Why wouldn't he be, I just asked for some alone time. Something he wouldn't be able to accompany me in. Then he shrugged.

"I guess". With that I kissed him on the cheek and put my hand out for the keys. He tugged them out of his pocket and placed them in my hand. "Where will you be?" I should have figured he was going to ask that. It made sense after all.

"First Beach". He seemed content with this as he pulled me into a hug. Holding on tight he let out a deep breath.

"Be careful Bella. Don't do anything stupid". I nodded my head and let go of the embrace.

"I won't be long". He turned back to the house and I started for the truck. Pulling open the door I swung myself into the drivers set. Placing my hands on the steering wheel I thought about why I was going down to the beach. Was there something there I needed? Probably not, but it just seemed like a good place to think. And right now I wanted to stew some things over. Turning the ignition I got started on my destination. First Beach should be pretty unpopulated right now, I smiled at the thought. Just me and the water.

Driving along the road I quickly noticed how dark it had been out today. Most of the sky was cloaked in deep gray clouds. Rain was probably going to be a given. Once I crossed the reservation line I couldn't help but take in the feeling of being free. The past two days I'd been trapped in a little house with six other people. Even though I loved Jacob and all his friends, alone time is something I've always cherished. I was a thinker and today I was going to do some thinking. With that I heard a load thump in the back of my truck. Turning my head I quickly saw someone in the bed.

"What the hell?" The person leaned himself over the edge and motioned for me to roll down my window. Doing so I watched in the rearview mirror as he pulled back his hood. Seeing who it was, I yelled out the window.

"SETH!" What the hell was he doing here? A smile broke across his face.

"Hey Bella"

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"Well I saw your truck so I figured I'd catch a ride". Then he turned his gaze around to take in the location. "So where are you going?" With his question I to also looked around. Why had I crossed the reservation line? I had intended to go down to the beach. A quick thought slipped. Where was my mind taking me? Once I realized that I'd left Seth's question hanging I answered him.

"First Beach"

"You do know you're going the wrong way right?" Turning onto the ditch I stopped the truck. Leaning my head out the window I motioned for Seth to get in. Gleefully he hopped the side of the truck and pulled the door open. Situating himself on the seat he continued to smile. I had to ask.

"What made you so happy?"

"Eh…nothing really". I slowed the truck as we reached a stop sign.

"Just tell me Seth. You owe me". His eyes widened and his jaw dropped.

"How do I owe you?"

"You're in my truck aren't you?" This settled him.

"Yeah, I suppose. Okay". He lifted his legs and placed his feet on the dashboard. I shot him a disapproving glace, but he didn't seem to take notice as he weaved his hands behind his head. "Just the hole situation with Leah. I think it's hilarious that she imprinted on the enemy. It's just like her to do something like that". I had to laugh. More than anything I agreed with him. Only Leah could get herself into something like that.

"Leah is one of a kind", Seth chuckled. I had to add to his statement.

"In a good way or a bad way?" Again a smile broke across his face. Noticing the expression I also smiled. This boys face was just meant for that. Smiling was like a second nature of the kid. I'd be willing to bet that even when he was mad he'd still be forcing back a smirk. Finally he answered.

"I guess a little of both. I absolutely hate her, but she's my sister. So I love her". I nodded in understanding. In ways I couldn't stand some of the people I loved. But none the less I loved them and I wouldn't think twice about dying for them. With that thought I pulled the truck to the side of the road and cut the engine. Seth turned to my gaze.

"Why are we stopping?"

"This is where you get out". His smile seemed to slightly waver.

"But I figured I could go to the beach with you"

"Seth, I just…-". He pushed open the door and swung a leg out.

"Naw, I get it. Alone time". I smiled at his understanding. He smiled back and fully climbed out the door. "I'll see ya later Bella".

"See you later Seth"

He shut the door and started walking with hands in pockets. Seth truly was the most tolerable one in the bunch. He knew when he was wanted and when he wasn't. That hit me with a feeling of guilt when I thought that. It wasn't exactly that I didn't want Seth to be with me, I just didn't want anyone to be with me. It wasn't anything personal. I hoped that he knew that. With a smile I realized that he probably did. Seth was a good kid. Turning the key I started down the road again. After a little more of a mile I pulled to the side and parked the truck. From here I would hike the rest of the way. Pulling on a raincoat I slumped out of the door and started for the woods. Once I made it into the damp surrounding of trees, I soon noticed that there was no path. I'd parked a little further from the beach than I had predicted. Without another thought I continued my steps. Just as long as it didn't start to rain. That way my footing would have at least half a chance. Just then a sprinkle started to break out. Thank-you Washington. Figuring I wouldn't have another chance to get out again anytime soon, I decided to step on.

…

For half an hour it had been raining pretty profusely. The ground was wet and slippery, but so far I had managed not to fall. My odds apparently had finally grown to my liking. At this rate I was most likely going to make it back with nothing more than the scratch a stray shrub had caused earlier back. I smiled faintly with appreciation. Once my eyes caught the beach strip I felt the urge to walk along it. Looking down I couldn't help feeling grateful for the rain boots I had on. It looked like today was going to be in my favor. When I reached the water I took in a deep breath. The air was misty and stale, but I enjoyed the taste on my tongue. Watching along the ripples of the water I took notice of my surroundings. The once pale tan sand was now dark with the damp weather. Muddy more than anything. My boots were going to need a good cleaning after today. Searching along the beach I enjoyed the fact that I was alone. It wasn't a surprise though, the beach wasn't a very popular place in mid September. The water was too cold by now. When the rain started to grow heavier I pulled my coats hood over my face, struggling with the strings to securely hide my face from the wet. Through the small opening of my hood I saw a familiar piece of driftwood. Splashing through the mud puddles I made my way towards it. Taking a seat, I settled myself on the natural bench, while the rain continued to fall down on me. Images of Jacob in the early days passed my mind. He had been so innocent and warm. He still was in a way. I felt warmth smile in my chest. I had used him that day when we first met. Flirting with him, not thinking about the consequences. Thinking back on it, it really wasn't the first time we'd met. But it was the first time we'd actually talked. I'd made him fall for me. All the pain we'd gone through the following years had been my fault. Everything that had happened was due to my undying curiosity. And still I had no regrets. Then a picture of Edward slipped into my head. The warm smile like feeling faded away instantly. I did have one regret. Just one.

Searching the beach again, my eyes stopped at a cluster of waves. White water broke at the surface and stormily made it's way to the shore. If I had been able to, I would have done things better. I hated to hurt people and never had I hurt anyone like I did Edward. In all aspects I had ruined him. He showed me nothing but love and protection and I'd thrown it in his face. My feelings for Jacob had overshadowed his and because of that I lived with the pain of seeing his face everyday repeated in my mind. I told him that I loved someone else. Someone that was not him. The hurt in his eyes had been too much. It haunted me every night. Closing my eyes with the freshly dug memories I corrected myself. Every day. His face haunted me everyday. It seemed that the rain had started to lighten so I loosened the strings and pulled back my hood. A slight breeze caught my damp hair and brushed loose strands across my face. What was I going to do? Answering my own question I thought out loud.

"I can't live like this"

Slowly a small sob started to escape my lips. Turning into tears I broke out of my steady calm and let myself cry. It felt good to let some emotion out. I couldn't just cry like this in front of Jacob and tell him what it was for. If he knew how much it killed me to leave Edward he wouldn't have let me do it. But that had given me more the reason to pick him. Jacob had been my reason for letting Edward go. I guess in a way he made it possible for me to do it. It hurt to think it, but if I hadn't met Jacob then my life probably would have been better. I never would have had to gone through that with Edward. Instantly a feeling of dread took over my insides. I could actually feel the hurt of my words in my heart. Another set of tears that represented something totally different from the previous ones streamed down my cheeks. That had been the worst thought I had ever had. How could I have let that come into my head? I hadn't meant it. Jacob was my life. Without him nothing would have been warm. I would never had seen the sun. Right then I hated myself more than ever before. Just by an accidental thought I felt like I had stabbed him in the back. I had believed my heart was totally open to him, but maybe thoughts about Edward had been keeping it shut? Could that be possible? Had I been betraying my sunlight by refusing to open the shades? Just then I noticed a glitter from the sun reflect against the water. Turing my gaze I took in a sight that I hadn't expected to see. Not ever in a million years. Taking in a deep breath I digested the fact that I was not alone like I had thought I was. Someone else very much was there, standing just across the strip of dark sand. And he was looking back at me as our eyes connected. The only thought that passed my mind then was one of questioning and shock. But why? Why had he come now?