Disclaimer: No. *sigh*
12. Insurance
"So yes – we're staying." Dean said firmly.
"And there's no way you're going to let me talk you out of that, are you?" Jake bit his bottom lip.
"Not a chance in hell." Dean smirked cockily.
"Dean," Sam interrupted, "…if we're gonna work with these guys, we should take a couple precautions."
"Damn straight Sammy." Dean clapped his hands. He'd already thought of that. His dad would kick his ass from here to hell and back if he knew that his boys were going to work with a bunch of the enemy. Granted, his dad was a stubborn sonofabitch on his best of days, and a hard-assed drill sergeant with a loaded weapon and a quick foot on the rest. And if this incoming army was as big as he and Sam thought it was, there was no way they could really take them out on their own. They could call in help, but that would take time that they probably didn't have.
"Do you guys know when this army is going to get here?" Dean asked Jake.
"The fortune teller said she sees them coming early morning, day after tomorrow." Jake nodded towards Alice on the other side of the line of wolves. Dean risked a glance at the pixie-like vampire. She was still tucked under Jasper's arm, and she was pointedly ignoring the wolves in front of her. Her entire attention was focused solely on the hunters, and her brow was still as furrowed now as it was earlier. Dean didn't like her looking at them like that, and again he wondered how her visions worked.
"So what was your guys' plan?" Sam asked.
"We're going to hide Bella in the mountain range tomorrow. We're going to use her to lay a scent trail for the bloodsuckers to follow here, where we ambush them and kill them all."
"You're sending her up there alone?" Dean scowled.
"Edward's staying with me." Bella looked up sharply from her spot on the ground.
"Bella…" Edward said softly, putting a hand behind her head to turn her face to look at him.
"No Edward!" She shoved him in the chest, and instantly regretted it because he winced in pain from the arrow wound. "No." She said quieter. "No. I will not sit up there alone, and wonder what's happening down here to the people I love."
"Bella, please be reasonable." Edward murmured.
Jake scoffed. "And when has Bells ever been reasonable, you ass?" Edward shot him a dark look.
"Dude," Dean smirked, "you two have some serious issues."
"We have one issue." Jake pointedly looked at Bella and then turned his back on the two lovebirds.
"Bella, if I'm up there, I won't know what's happening here. It's my family – I have to fight." Edward pleaded with her.
"If you're staying down here, then so am I." She said gravely.
"Come on Bells." Jake said derisively. "You know I don't like to agree with this jerk-off, but you're in danger if you're down here in the middle of this fight. Either you get hurt, or one of us does trying to protect you. You're not staying."
"But you can't keep her up there alone!" Dean yelled. "Her luck, she'd fall off the side of the mountain." Eddie and Jake both rolled their eyes at that one.
Did this chick seriously fall off the side of a mountain?
"We're not sending her up there alone." Jake insisted. "We're sending Seth up to take care of her." Jake nodded at the smallest wolf at the end of the line. He was all long legs and overgrown paws, and his head was darting from one direction to another like a dog with an attention span issue. He looked more like an overgrown coyote than a wolf. "Seth is the youngest, and we don't really want him down here in the middle of the fight because he's least experienced." Jake whispered. "He'll keep an eye on Bella."
"And what happens if she's found up there?" Sam argued. "That overgrown puppy is supposed to protect her?"
"If something happens, Seth will let us know and we'll get to her."
"And how is he supposed to let you know that she's in danger?" Dean snarked. "Your cell have a function that automatically dials the right number if you bark a certain number of times?"
Jake narrowed his eyes at him. "When we run as wolves, the pack mind is connected."
"What the fuck does that mean? Connected?" Dean sneered.
"We hear each other's thoughts. Even hundreds of miles apart, we can hear each other."
"Like a Vulcan Mind-Meld?" Dean's face scrunched up at how horrible it would be to not keep their thoughts to themselves, if he and Sam had a mind link. That would so suck.
"Yeah, I guess so." Jake shrugged.
"Dude, that blows." Sam said.
"You're telling me. The wolf you kicked into the rocks is dating my sister." Jake grimaced. Both hunters did too. No one wanted brain-stabbing imagery of a naked sibling.
"Okay, so Seth babysits Bella…" Sam started.
"I am not going to be 'babysat'!" Bella spat.
"Bella, love, please…" Edward tried to persuade her.
"Seth will want to come down to the fight too. I'll talk him into bringing me back down." Bella crossed her arms across her chest and Dean almost expected her to stick her tongue out. A silver wolf at the end of the line turned its head and growled viciously at Bella. Bella just turned her head and ignored the creature.
"Seth won't bring you back if I tell him not to!" Jake snapped at her.
"So, are you in charge of this bunch, Jake?" Dean asked.
He shook his head. "Sam's Alpha." He gestured to the largest wolf in the center of the line. "I'm second. So Seth will do what I damn well tell him." He growled that last bit at Bella to drive his point home.
"So why didn't your boss phase back to two legs to talk to us himself?" Dean baited him. He didn't miss the way Jake looked at the head wolf. There was a little dissention in the ranks.
"Because of Bella… I'm a little closer to the situation than he is."
"And he doesn't trust the vampires enough to be human around them." Sam inferred.
"Not by a long shot." Jake snorted.
So Dean would give Jake some credit in the 'balls' department. If the head honcho didn't have the nads to phase in front of the vampires, and Jake did, than he'd just earned a couple extra respect points from the experienced hunter.
"Dean…" Sam nudged him, "…precautions."
"Right you are Sammy." Dean pulled his cell phone from his pocket and held the 'two' button that would call Caleb's phone. It rang twice.
Pick up you sonofabitch.
The third ring. "Deuce?" Caleb's sleep-heavy voice filled his ear.
Dean sighed inwardly. "Hey Damien," Dean made his voice happy and upbeat.
"Dude, you are way too happy, what's going on?" He yawned.
"Hey man, we figured out what's causing all the trouble in Seattle."
"Yeah? And it makes you that happy? What is it? Tell me it's a succubus."
"Vampires."
"Vampires? Really? There's got to be a shit load of them to be racking up a body count like that one." He seemed to be waking up a bit now.
"You ain't kidding. There's a fucking army of them."
"Well you and the runt can't take all of them on at once. Give me two days to finish up here. We'll call in Bobby and Josh. Hell, Ethan and Elijah will want in on this too."
"Yeah… Here's the thing dude." Dean rubbed a hand across the back of his neck. Damien was going to freak. "There's no time to wait. The bitch in charge of the Seattle vamps has a grudge against another family of vampires – the Cullens. They live off animal blood, and one of them is hot and heavy with a human chick, who this Vicky bitch has a huge vendetta against. She's going to be here in about twenty-four hours, and we're going to fight with the Cullens and take her down."
There was silence for five whole seconds before Dean's phone exploded.
"Dean! Have you lost your fucking mind!?"
"Lost it years ago man." Dean tried to joke.
"You're going to trust a family of vampires? You're going to fight beside them and take out other vampires? Do you know how fucking crazy that is? Where's Sam? Put him on the goddamn phone! The runt can't be onboard with this."
"Sammy's cool with the idea. We're making friends here."
Caleb snorted derisively. They didn't make friends. Dean turned to look at Jake. The big guy was watching him with an amused smile on his face, and Dean wondered if the Wolfman could hear the conversation on the other end of the line.
"We're not the only ones fighting against them here." Dean said slowly.
Caleb snorted again. "Who else is up there to help you two? The Keebler Fucking-Elves?"
"There's a pack of wolves here that are fighting too."
Dead silence… "Wolves?" Damien asked disbelievingly. Dean could see his friend's confused eyebrow cocking up from all the way down in Texas.
"Yeah… They think they're werewolves, but they totally aren't. Sam called them anti-magnets…"
"Animagus." Sam corrected him.
"…Yeah… That. Some boy-wizard-thing. You remember how Sam had a thing for magic when he was a kid? Anyway, we're gonna team up with these guys and torch the bitch before she ups the body count any more."
"Dean." Caleb said his given name with an air of diminishing patience. "Even you aren't crazy enough to hunt next to two groups of fuglies that should be on your goddamn hit list."
"Well, that's why I'm calling you." Dean said, scrubbing his hand over the back of his neck again. He looked over at Sam, standing a few feet away and eyeing him critically. Dean only had a few more weeks, and then it was a one way trip downstairs. So if he died up here, it didn't really matter, he was on borrowed time as it was. But Sammy? Sam had the rest of his life in front of him, and if Dean went down in this fight, there would be no one to watch Sam's back. It was the last thing he could do to make sure his brother made it out of here alive. Dean didn't trust the vamps, and he had no reason to trust the wolves. He had to protect Sam.
"Dude!" Dean called to Sam and went to kneel in front of Bella and Edward. Both teens looked at him like he lost his mind, and that they'd like to kill him… respectively. "Capture the moment." Dean made a clicking motion with his finger, miming for Sam to take their picture. Sam pulled his cell out of his pocket and snapped a picture of the three of them. Bella and Edward confused, and Dean giving the camera the thumbs up and flashing a goofy, shit-eating grin.
"Damien, Sammy's gonna send you a photo and some co-ordinates for where we are. The kids in the picture are Edward Cullen, and Bella Swan. They're the ones in the middle of this shit-storm. Bella's human, Edward can read minds, and his sister can see the future, so look out for them."
"Look out for them?" Caleb demanded. "What are you talking about."
"Yes…" Edward hissed. "What are you talking about?"
Okay, so mindfucker can hear the conversation too. Dean rolled his eyes.
"We're gonna fight, and you know we are so don't bother trying to talk us out of it." Dean said into the phone. "But if these fuckers double-cross us… If Sammy doesn't make it out of here alive… You rally the fucking troops, man. You bring everyone and you level this fucking town until all the vampires and all the wolves are toast. The wolves are Natives, and there's a reservation nearby – that would be a good place to start looking for them."
Edward hissed again. Jake growled and took a step nearer to Dean, but Sam stepped forward too and shook his head slightly at the giant. A low growl went up from the line of wolves.
"So what am I?" Caleb huffed into the phone. "Your fucking insurance plan?"
"That's exactly what you are. And now everyone here knows it. Anyone tries to get cute, and everyone dies."
"I don't like this. I think you should wait until all of us can get there, and we can take them all down."
"No time. And unless they do stab us in the back, we can't make a move on them. They haven't hurt anybody."
"Deuce…"
"Remember, Edward's a mind-reader, but you can block him. Alice has visions, and Josh's scent amulets work. Hey… Tell him I'm giving him a raise… he'll get a kick out of that."
"Don't make jokes man."
"Look, I gotta run. It's getting a little tense up here now." Jake was staring at him and shaking from head to toe. His fists were balled up and tight to his sides, and his face was turning scarlet. It was alarming to say the least and Dean wondered if he was about to hulk out.
"You making a situation tense? Really? Who'd a thought." Dean could feel the eye roll on the other end of the line.
"We'll call you on scheduled check-ins, and I'll call you when it's over. If you don't hear from me or Sammy, call in the cavalry."
"Deuce!" Caleb shouted, but Dean flipped his phone shut.
"What the hell did you just do?" Jake spit out from bared teeth.
Dean spoke loudly for everyone to hear. He had to be very loud, there was a lot of hissing and growling coming from all around him. "Just so we're all on the same page, my brother and I are staying to make sure everything goes down like it's supposed to. Anyone gets any bright ideas to take out either of us to 'protect a secret'," Dean made quotation marks in the air, "…then this guy," he waved his phone in the air, "…will come and bring all our hunting buddies with him."
"And what happens if you die in the fight and it's not our doing?" Carlisle called, his normally calm face marred by an anger that Dean didn't know he could possess. "Will your friends come for retribution?"
"Let's just say it's a good idea to make sure that Sam and I don't have an unfortunate accident."
"You're human." Alice seethed. "The newborns will bee-line right for you. You have a damn target on your back and you want us to be held responsible for you?"
"If everyone does their job like they're supposed to, we'll be gone after the fight and you'll never see us again. Screw us over… and you'll never see this guy coming." Dean waved his phone again. It wasn't an empty boast. If anyone could take out a large portion of the Cullen family, it would be Caleb.
"I will see." Alice glared at him.
"Oh yeah?" Sam scoffed at her. "Like you saw us coming for Bella tonight? Might want to get your prescription checked out, Al." The tiny vampire glowered at the massive hunter. "Something tells me you can't see us. You don't know why and it pisses you off big time."
"So let me get this straight." Jake fumed. "So long as you two idiots don't get yourselves killed, we don't have to watch our backs for your buddies."
"That's the short of it Fuzzy." Dean deadpanned. He felt like shit for pulling a stunt like this one on the wolf pack. There was a very real chance he could die up here, and they would suffer if Sam died too. But he had to put Sam first.
Dean crossed the distance to Jake and risked standing so close that the giant had to lean down to hear the hunters softly whispered words. "My brother is my responsibility. He makes it out at all costs."
"Even at the cost of one of my brothers?" Jake said in a low growl.
"Sam and I can hold our own in a fight. You saw that. I don't trust those stinking vampires an inch – and neither do you." Jake just glowered down at him, but he couldn't refute what was said.
Jake swallowed hard, seemed to hold his breath and count down in an attempt to calm his temper. After a few seconds, he said, "You two go no where without a guard. Do you hear me? No where."
"You gonna hold my hand when I gotta take a leak?" Dean smirked at him, trying to make a joke because he felt it was really important to get Jake to calm down. He was still shaking.
Jake lashed out with a vicious right hook to Dean's jaw. His head snapped back and he nearly lost his balance from the force of the impact. Reeling, Dean held a hand to his jaw and stood back up to defend himself from Jake. Sam stepped forward and Edward grabbed Bella to pull her away from the two.
But the next blow didn't fall. Jake, quivering from head to toe, pointed a finger at him and hissed, "No where." Jake turned on his heel and stalked back to the tree line.
Spoiler Below!!
A/N: And I've made no secret to being a Dean girl, but the episode the other night "Changing Channels" (which I've been waiting for ever since they gave us the spoiler showing the boys in the Horatio Caine suits) hands down goes to Sam!! Well done Jared, that was awesome! Really hope they come up with a cure for Genital Herpes – don't want you missing out on all the action out there what with your case of the Clap you got from the He-Witch last week. Women everywhere would be weeping at the loss ;D
"Mr. Trickster no like pretty-boy angel." *Evil snickering* Loved that part.