Narcissa Black was sitting alone on that crisp evening. She watched the leaves fall from the Oak tree above her with mild interest, the only sounds that could be heard was her breathing, and the lapping of gentle water from the lake. Pulling up her sleeve, she inspected her arm. Flawless skin. No brand, no mark, nothing. It was a small piece of dignity that kept her going; she would not work for Voldemort no matter what. Never would she lower her standards to become a death eater. More and more people were dying, and it was tearing her up inside. After her argument with Remus earlier on, she had kept her distance from the marauders, even though James, Sirius and Peter had no problem with her, she deemed it sensible not to intrude. A constant war was going on in her head. Half of her wanted to kiss him and forgive him, assuring him there was nothing between Sirius and herself. And although in most perspective that was true, a small part of her spoke against this.
You'd be lying to yourself, Narcissa. Something in her brain was speaking to her, surveying her with curiousity. Did you ever even love Remus, Narcissa? No, you did not. You only wanted him to get closer to Sirius... The voice was cold and intruding; her mind flickered with images that were not hers. Why not be honest towards Remus - you don't even love him.
Yes, I do love Remus.
Such lies Narcissa,
such LIES ...
Leave me
alone!
Lies... Lies...
Lies...
Tears ran down her face,
and a triumphant laugh in her mind told her, whoever it was, had
succeeded in torturing her. Whoever it was left abruptly. Closing her
eyes, she tried to sleep, tried to block anything and everything out
...
She must of dozed off for
a while, because when her eyes opened she was faced by a misty air,
the night sky now dark. It was not full moon, but that was hardly any
reassurance. A wet, cold nose pushed against cheek. She started, only
to see a big, black dog sitting next to her, it's head to one side,
watching her. She blinked; and saw it was now Sirius sitting next to
her.
"I forgot you were an Animagus," she said quietly,
pushing her blonde hair back of her face.
He smiled. "Where've
you been? You dissapeared, dear cousin."
"Argument
with-"
"Ah, that explains things then." He leant
back against the tree, his hair flopping over his face. He was so ...
handsome. Carelessly handsome. "He's been pretty depressed ever
since you both walked off together. What happened; if you don't mind
me asking? James tried to ask but Moony got pretty angry with him and
went off to the Library. Wormy tried too, but Moony actually pointed
his wand at him and threatened him to keep away. I decided not to ask
- what would of been the point?" He paused, watching her rub her
tearstained face with her hand. "Did he make you cry, Narcissa?"
His tone changed.
She nodded, then shook her head. He looked
imploringly at her, as if urging her to speak. "Yes and
noSomething,
or someone, entered my mind, told me things, manipulated my thoughts
and loaded images into my mind that were so
horrible. They looked futuristic, nothing similiar to what we're used
to now. Sirius, Remus thinks..."
Narcissa paused. Should she
ruin a friendship with Sirius, and a relationship with Remus?
Sirius saw her hestitate,
and he placed a hand on hers. "This isn't going to change
anything between us all, dear cousin." As his hand covered hers
she instantly felt warmer, inside and out. "He thinks ... he
thinks ... I love you."
For a moment, his expression did not
change, and she feared the worst. But then his face broke out into a
smile. "Well - I love you, Narcissa."
"Sirius - he
means love love."
"I
know."
"What? Did you hear me-"
Sirius sighed.
"Narcissa, I have been blessed with magnificent hearing, but in
answer to your question, yes, I did hear you, and yes, I do love
you."
She was silenced. Her attention was half-caught by the
murmur of the lake and the sound of the low wind swirling around
them. He leant forward to kiss her, and the moment she kissed him she
regretted it, but he was so warm, tender, loving ... his lips brushed
against hers for more when-
"NARCISSAAAA! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!"
Sirius was shaking her. He
had somehow intruded hospitality by enterting the Slytherin common
room, were Narcissa was on the couch, asleep. "Whaa- oh!"
she blushed, realising it had all been a dream, just a terrible,
misleading dream.
"It's Quidditch, you doze! Slytherin VS
Gryffindor; and WE will obviously win." He pulled her up smugly.
"I think you'd better talk to Remus, though ..." she saw he
was in Quidditch outfit; his red cape flowing gently. "You
don't-"
"Play Quidditch? Heh - I'm Keeper for this
match. Should be fun. Well - what are you waiting for - lets go!"
She
stood, yawning, catching her reflection in the mirror by the
bookcase. She looked rather tired, her blonde hair slightly messy.
Sirius had left, and was waiting outside the portrait, when the words
from last night happened again.
You'd be lying to yourself, Narcissa. Something in her brain was speaking to her, surveying her with curiousity. Did you ever even love Remus, Narcissa? No, you did not. You only wanted him to get closer to Sirius... The voice was cold and intruding; her mind flickered with images that were not hers. Why not be honest towards Remus - you don't even love him.
Yes, I do love Remus.
Such lies Narcissa,
such LIES ...
Leave me
alone!
Lies... Lies... Lies...
She shook her head, and brushing herself down, went to join Sirius.
