The Mourning After
Part II Chapter XVII
Thank you for the reviews last chapter! It's so good to know that people are reading and enjoying the story. I've been waiting for two years to get to this moment and I can't believe it is finally here. I didn't realize it would take so long to write this story but I guess that's how things go. I just want to say that I initially wrote this story all the way back in December 2007 because of a great personal tragedy that happened to this guy I know. At one point, I was close to this person but not anymore (that in itself is another story). Anyways, in one night, he lost his entire family in a terrible fire and at the same time my grandfather had a severe stroke, so my sadness and angst got transferred into this story. I didn't put my own personal situations into this story but I did put my emotions into it, hence the very angsty feel. This story is about love, loss, family and I hope I was able to convey that. Like I said, I've been waiting for a while to write this chapter and had this in my head for almost two years. I'm so happy to finally be able to share this with you. Thank you again for sticking by this story, despite my long delays in updating, I hope the journey was worth. Thanks again to Kelly for your help.
Enjoy and please share your thoughts!
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Deb sat on her bed and reached over to the nightstand and opened up a small drawer. Inside, she pulled out a small photo frame with a picture of a young Nathan Scott on it, his dark hair, blue eyes, and white turtle neck that Nathan would later question her choice of clothing for him. Like so many times over the past two years, she would take this photo out and stare at it, gently tracing the features of his face against the glass. The loss of not having him in her life was more than she could have ever thought possible, but the birth of her grandson and the support of her family helped her through the dark times. She didn't know where she got her strength but she knew she couldn't fall or falter. In her mind, she failed as a mother to her only son and she vowed she would be better for her grandson.
A tear rolled down her eye. She couldn't believe it, was it true? Nathan was really alive. Dan had just explained to her everything that happened, how Nathan faked his death, how he'd been in the witness protection program, and Haley finally spoke up revealing how she recently knew all this and her pregnancy was a product of her finding Nathan again. Her world was suddenly flipped upside down again. She didn't know which way was up and down. This was too much to take in, too good to be true. How was it that in a span of a couple of minutes, she'd be a mother again, a grandmother again.
"Deb." Dan knocked softly at the doorway and entered their bedroom carefully. After coming clean with everything, she promptly smacked him across the face for lying to her all these years and stormed up to her room. He knew this must come as a shock and he knew one day he would have to pay the price for lying to his family. Carefully, he made his way onto the bed and sat next to her. He looked at the picture and her tear stricken face.
"Deb, talk to me."
"How can I? I don't even know you."
"Deb, it's me.. you do know me."
"Do I?" She turned to face him. "Over two years Dan." She choked out. "Two years you let me believe Nathan was dead, thought we finally found each other again but it was all a lie wasn't it."
"Nathan's death, yes but not us Deb."
"You have this whole other life that I don't even know about. It's so easy for you to hide things from me."
"Believe me Deb, I wanted to tell you but I couldn't. For Nathan's sake and the sake of Haley and Jamie I couldn't, please believe me. I didn't want to lie to you, to Lucas, to anyone else."
A swirl of emotions were raging inside of her, happy, sad, angry. She looked down at the picture again and stared at the beautiful little boy in front of her, God Jamie looked so much like him, except for the sandy blond hair. Her boy was alive, he was alive, she told herself. She turned to face Dan again, a fresh batch of tears in her eyes.
"Bring my son home Dan. Bring him home." She choked out and Dan put his arm around her and held her close as she cried her eyes out.
. . . . . .
Lucas leaned against the car and checked his watch again. He tapped his foot impatiently as he waited by the runway.
"They should be here any minute now Luke, just relax." Luke's Uncle Keith stated.
Lucas took a deep breath and rubbed his sweaty palms against his jeans. "Easier said than done." Luke muttered, he felt like he could lose it at any moment. It had been that way ever since his father told him that Nathan was indeed alive and that he was in fact the father of Haley's unborn child. To say he was shocked was an understatement. He felt as if someone knocked the wind right out of him. His mind was still reeling and looking back, he wondered why he never figured it out. He remembered the last time he saw Nathan at the hospital over two years ago, the weird feeling he got when Nathan told him to look out for Haley and his unborn child. He should've known and more importantly, he should've had more faith in his best friend.
When he found out that Haley was pregnant again, he nearly lost it. He knew that Haley would eventually move on with her life but to be pregnant so soon, it was like a smack to his brother's memory. In death, his love for his brother only grew and the need to fulfill his last wishes as well. He was hard on Haley, he knew that. He wanted to be there for Jamie just as much Keith was for him. He never saw two people more in love than Haley and him and it was because of that, he was so shocked to see Haley move on. He should've trusted in that love, that as soon as he found out Haley was pregnant, that he should've known it was Nathan's. With a love like theirs, there was no way it could be replaced.
"Haley." Luke turned to Haley. Dan had just told them the truth about Nathan. He couldn't believe it, he didn't know what to feel, shock, happy, guilt.
"Luke, it's okay, you don't need to say anything."
"Yes, I do." Luke scratched his head. " I didn't know Haley, I'm so sorry for how I've treated you.. I didn't mean what I said."
"Yes you did Luke."
"Hales.."
"Luke, I can stand here and be mad at you, which I am by the way, but you didn't know." Haley sighed. "Look, do you remember when me and Nathan started dating?"
"I hated his guts."
"And the feeling was mutual but I knew that if you two could get passed your differences that you two can find something special in each other, so I get it Luke. It doesn't make it right but I get it, you thought you were protecting your brother.. I can't.. I can't fault you for that, especially now that he's coming home."
"Hales, I'm sorry, I don't care what I have to do but I'll make it up to you."
"Luke, just keep doing what you've been doing, a good brother to Nathan.. a great Uncle to Jamie.."
"And us?"
"Give it time." Haley gave him a small smile and just as quickly, her smile fell and she started to tear.
"Hales, what's wrong?" Lucas rushed to her side.
"I'm going to need help in explaining to Jamie that his daddy's coming." She cried out, everything hitting her. "He's coming home.. oh my God Luke, he's finally coming home." The tears of joy pouring down from her face.
"There's a plane." Keith said interrupting Lucas' thoughts.
Lucas looked up against the bright blue sky. Holding his hand up, he squinted towards the sky and saw a small aircraft heading their way.
. . . . . .
"Fasten up son, we're almost home." Dan smiled at Nathan and took a seat across from him on the small charter plane. Nathan tightened his seat belt and looked out the window. Already, he can make out some of the landmarks in Tree Hill and in the surrounding area. When his father showed up, he couldn't believe it. In fact, it was still all surreal that this was happening. He couldn't believe that Rachel was working with Dan all this time and that for the past couple of months she's been working under cover to bring down Bear. He wasn't exactly sure what happened, but he didn't care. All that mattered was that he was gone and no longer a threat to him or his family.
He still couldn't believe he was back in North Carolina, he'd been in a haze every since his dad showed up. He was almost too afraid to say it aloud, he'd dreamt of this moment for so long that he feared that he would wake up and be back in that lonely New York apartment.
The pilot went on the intercom and soon they started to make their descent.
"There they are!" Keith said excitedly and Lucas' heart was beating wildly in his chest. It took a few minutes but the landing door finally flew open and a stewardess walked down first. Behind her, Dan made his way down. He smiled at his brother and son before looking up and then Nathan suddenly reappeared.
Seeing his brother for the first time in over two years, Lucas' mouth dropped. He looked the same, he looked different, he couldn't believe that he was actually here. Their eyes locked and they both gave each other a small smile. Nathan carefully made his way down the short flight of stairs. He was so nervous, anxious, that he thought his knees could give way. He reached the landing and first greeted Keith.
"Uncle Keith." Nathan smiled and the two shared a hug.
"Nathan, God it's good to have you back." Keith snuffled. Keith was never an overly emotional guy, but his voice cracked and his eyes were watery. After Nathan's death, he regretted not getting to know his other nephew and now he had his second chance. Pulling away from Keith, Nathan turned to face his brother.
Emotions were on high alert as the two brothers stared each other down. Seeing Keith's reaction only made Lucas more anxious, elated. He couldn't help it as his eyes started to water, but knowing his brother, he'd be teased for years so he tried his best to suppress it.
"Don't start the water works on me now." Nathan choked out, his eyes too getting watery.
Luke gave a small laugh and grabbed his outstretched arm and pulled Nathan into him, embracing his brother tightly. "Get over here."
The other set of brothers, Dan and Keith, behind them were also touched at the scene before them, both older brothers giving each other a smiling nod.
Nathan laughed right back and padded his brother's back. Lucas pulled back and got a good look at his brother. "It's good to have you back home, little brother." Lucas playfully smacked his brother's cleanly shaven cheek.
. . . . .
Deb sat nervously in the living room, Karen right next to her. She could kill Dan for lying to her but at the moment that was the farthest thing from her mind. Her only son was coming home and she could hardly contain herself. Deb. She was starting to regret her decision not go to the airport. Legally, she couldn't go with Dan to New York and they didn't want to overwhelm Nathan at the airport, which was why only Keith and Lucas went.
Just then, they heard the sound of Keith's truck and both women looked anxiously at each other. Deb stood up but she couldn't move from her spot.
"Haley, they're here!" Karen called out.
A second later, the door swung open and Dan, Keith and Lucas entered, carrying some of Nathan's bags. Keith put the luggage on the floor and motioned with his hands to take it easy to the two very nervous and anxious women in front of him. These types of situations were also tricky and as happy as this occasion was, they didn't want to overwhelm Nathan.
Then as if appearing out of nowhere, Nathan stepped into the house he grew up, everything becoming so surreal to him. He looked into the living room and noticed the tears already pouring down Deb's face. Carefully, they walked over to each other.
"Oh Nathan." Deb choked out as she wrapped her arms around her son, not believing that he was actually here. "Oh God, I've missed you so much."
"I've missed you so much too mom." Nathan pulled away, sniffling a bit. "I'm sorry.."
"Stop." Deb shook her head. "Look, there'll be plenty for that later but right now, I just.. I just want to welcome you home."
"And it's good to be home." Nathan hugged his mom and the two stood there in each other's embrace, basking in the moment before finally pulling away. It was then that he noticed Karen, her face also tear struck and they shared a tender hug as well.
"Where's.. where's Haley? And James?" Nathan asked, looking around the room and noticing they weren't there. As much as he wanted to catch up with everyone, the only two people in mind were his wife and son.
"Right here."
Nathan whipped his head around and found Haley standing on the other side of the living room. Immediately, he went over to her, kissing her deeply and passionately. It was only a short time ago that they were together but to them even a day apart was too long. It wasn't until they heard clearing of throats that they finally pulled apart. Haley blushed turning into a shade of red while Nathan looked on smirking.
"How are you?" He asked, rubbing his hand against her side.
"Better." She smiled back. "Both of us." Haley looked down at her still flat stomach.
"You sure?" Nathan asked with concern, placing his hand over her belly.
"Yes." Haley nodded and caressed his cleanly shaven cheeks. She had gotten used to seeing him with a mustache but seeing him fully shaven was like stepping back in time. He looked handsome, he always did but even more so now.
Haley sniffled then took Nathan's hand in her own. Like everyone else, she couldn't believe that Nathan was here. When Dan told her what happened, she almost didn't believe it. It was too good to be true but now that he was standing here in front of her, in front of their family, her heart filled with joy and happiness.
"Come on, there's someone here that wants to meet you." Haley led them off to the den next door. She was nervous, she didn't know how Jamie would react. Through pictures, they made sure to Jamie knew his father but he was so young, they didn't know how his little mind would react.
Entering the den, Nathan noticed his dad's trophies and memorabilia mixed in with Jamie's toys. Apparently, this space was no longer a retreat for Dan but for Jamie. He gripped Haley's hand tighter as he saw the little boy playing with some toys on the floor. The last time he saw Jamie, he was so small and now he was so much bigger, so full of life and beautiful.
Haley let go of Nathan's hand and kneeled down against Jamie, stroking his hair.
"Jamie, honey, there's someone I'd like you to meet." Haley opened her arms and scooped Jamie up. Gently, rocking him, she walked over to Nathan.
"Jamie, look." Haley pointed to Nathan.
It was then that father and son locked eyes. There was a momentary flash of confusion spread across Jamie's face and Nathan winced at the fact that he was a stranger meeting his son for the first time. A sharp pain coursed through him as he realized how much he'd missed but he just as quickly put that pain aside. There was nothing that was going to keep him from his family any more. But then his little mouth hung open as he gasped and smiled back at his mom. He wiggled his body, indicating that he wanted to be put down. He ran over to one of the lower shelves on the bookcase and grabbed a picture frame and then brought it to his mom.
"Dadda!" Jamie laughed as he held up Nathan's high school graduation picture. Nathan felt like his heart was going to leap out of his chest. His son knew him, maybe not personally, but he was so thankful to Haley and the rest of his family who kept his memory alive.
"Good job buddy." Haley took the picture from Jamie. "It's daddy, say hi to your daddy."
Jamie kept laughing as he quickly darted towards Nathan. Nathan was a little shocked as he scooped his son for the first time in over two years. Haley smiled, her son was always such a ball of energy and liked garnering the attention of anyone he meets.
"Hi Daddy!" Jamie wrapped his little arms around Nathan's neck and hugged his daddy tight.
"Hey buddy." Nathan choked out as he kissed the top of Jamie's head. A tear spilled from his eye and he looked at Haley who had a hand over her heart, her eyes wet with tears of joy. They gave each other a comforting smile before he hugged Jamie tighter. For the past two years, there was an emptiness he always felt. But now he finally felt whole again, the pain of being away forced away from his family was being washed away by his return back to them, to him. He held him tight, not wanting to let him go, not quite believing that the last time he held him was on the day of his birth.
Jamie pulled back and his little hands started to wander over his dad's face. Apparently, the little boy was also surprised to see the man he so often seen in pictures but never in real life. His smile faded as he pouted. He'd mistaken his father's sullen expression and tears. "Daddy sad?" The little boy asked.
Nathan laughed nervously and shook his head, taking a good look at the handsome young boy in front of him.
"No, son. Daddy's very very happy." Nathan smiled back and running his hand over the little boy's blond hair.
Not quite believing him, Jamie wiggled his way back down and ran over to the toy cars he was just playing with.
"Lookie, cars!" Jamie handed one to Nathan.
"I see that." Nathan gave him a quizzical look. Then Jamie went on the floor and started to drag one of the cars across the carpet. "VROOOM!!" His little voice bellowed and then taking another car, he smashed the two together and then laughed out loud again.
"Your turn daddy!" Jamie said excitedly and Nathan kneeled down next to Jamie and started to imitate what Jamie just done. Nathan felt a little awkward at first, not quite sure what to do in front of a 2 and a half year old but Jamie continued to laugh and make car noises, which eased Nathan's nerves. It didn't take long to get into the spirit of things and pretty soon he was also making car and crash noises along with his son. Hearing Jamie laugh was one of the sweetest sounds he'd ever heard. He was glad his son was happy and healthy and he vowed to himself in that moment that he'll always try his best to make sure that his son stayed that way.
Haley looked on, leaning against the door way, overwhelmed with joy to see father and son playing together for the first time. She felt a comforting hand on her shoulder and turned around to find Lucas there, his eyes glossy, giving her a warm smile. She looked around and smiled warmly at everyone. Lucas wasn't the only one choking up with tears at the moment. No words needed to be said as everyone's hearts filled with joy at the sight of father and son. They didn't want to intrude and interrupt them though. They left the left Haley, Jamie and Nathan alone in the den so that they could be together, and for the first time, to truly be a family.
To Be Continued . . . .
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