Making Rules
So, I'm leaving the time-line on this kind of vague so I can decide when the show returns after the Olympics whether I want to weave the episodes in or not. Best assume that chapters are happening at most a few days apart unless otherwise noted. Also, this chapter relies on you having read Making Exceptions. So do it!
A few of you suggested something along the lines of the rule for this chapter, including Betherzzz, ME Wofford and Melissa Rivers. Bonus points to you all!
Tony followed Ziva toward the lab, matching her brisk pace. Suddenly she stopped and he nearly fell over trying to keep from crashing into her. "Ziva! What--" And then he smelled it. He didn't know how something could go from innocuous to agitating in a week, but there was no denying the power that the scent now had over him as well as Ziva. He stepped next to her and laced his fingers through hers.
After a moment, Ziva glanced up, her eyes shifting frantically even as she stood still.
"It's Abby's," Tony said as firmly as he could. "You're safe."
She nodded tentatively.
He stepped toward the doorway, tugging Ziva after him. "Rule seven," he reminded her.
"Always be specific when you lie?" Abby asked brightly from a foot away.
Tony jumped, squeezing Ziva's hand to keep her from panicking in spite of the rule.
Abby didn't miss the gesture. "Tony! Ziva!" she shrieked.
They separated at once. Abby grabbed both of their now-vacant hands and pulled them into the lab. "How could you lie at all! This is great! You can have gorgeous spy babies and you might have to keep it a secret from the boss-man, I guess, but--"
"What's a secret?" Ducky piped up from the camera on Abby's workbench.
Ziva turned despairing eyes toward Tony as Palmer appeared over Ducky's shoulder.
"Tony and Ziva are totally together! They were holding hands and everything!" Abby exclaimed.
Tony winced. Abby was high-strung even for her, and the caf-pow smell was over-powering inside the the lab.
"Re-ally." McGee said knowingly from further inside the lab.
They both glared at him,.
"And here you said I was writing fiction this whole time."
There was a pregnant pause as everyone waited for a denial, but after a mintue Ducky leapt to fill the silence. "Congratulations!" he called from the camera.
"Why were you going to lie about it, Tony?" Abby asked.
Tony and Ziva stared at each other. There was no going back now. She shrugged slightly, letting him speak. "We were making our own list of rules," he said slowly.
Abby gasped in pleasure, clapping her hands together. "What's number one? It's hard to top, 'I am the Lord your God,' but 'Never screw over your partner,' does pretty well--"
"We are still working on them, Abby," Ziva said, trying to cut her off.
"I should think 'Never take anything for granted,' work just as well for a relationship as a crime scene," Ducky suggested from the monitor. Palmer opened his mouth to add his own opinion, but Ducky continued. "And with that, we have to finish our autopsy. Best of luck, Tony, Ziva."
They waved weakly as he cut the feed.
Abby and McGee still faced them with feral grins. "What about 'Never involve lawyers'?" Abby added. "Don't want to follow in Gibbs' footsteps in the divorce department."
"I've heard 'Never go to bed angry' is a pretty good one," McGee offered.
"Like you've ever been in a bed with a woman!" Tony hastily deflected, trying to get out of the conversation.
McGee rolled his eyes. Abby punched Tony in the shoulder.
"Ow!"
"Don't me mean, Tony!" She turned to Ziva. "I'm still allowed to do that, right? If he's your...boyfriend? Wow, that sounds weird. What term do you like? Lover?"
"Partner will do, Abby," Ziva said stiffly. "And, by all means."
"Hey!" Tony protested.
Ziva grinned up at him briefly.
"So what's your rule seven?" Abby finally asked.
"Don't panic," Tony answered quickly.
"Why would you panic?" Abby frowned.
He looked to Ziva before he could stop himself, and suddenly everyone was staring at her.
She looked back and forth between them, unsure what exactly to say, the smell and the anxiety fragmenting her thoughts. Then she left, doing her best not to run until she was out of sight.
Tony stared after her.
"Oh, no!" Abby started to dart toward the door, but Tony caught her arm.
"Don't, Abs," he said quietly.
She turned worried eyes toward him. "She's upset!"
He flinched, knowing her reaction before he spoke. "It's not about you. Saleem drank that stuff, too." He nodded toward her caf-pow.
Abby followed his gaze, then looked back at Tony, stricken. "Ziva," she whispered.
Tony nodded, then snapped his head toward McGee. "Get Abby's report up to Gibbs, I'm going to check on her." He didn't wait for McGee's reply, instead dashing down the hallway. He barged into the women's room, checking under the fortunately-empty stalls, before trying the door to the men's room. It was locked.
He knocked softly. "Ziva?" he called. "It's me."
After a moment he heard the bolt being drawn; then she pulled him inside. Tony held her tightly.
"Are you alright?" he asked gently.
She shivered, but nodded.
"Maybe there should be a rule about holding hands at work."
Ziva looked up, her eyebrows lifting ironically. "You are holding me right now."
"Good point," he grinned.
Her face grew more serious. "Perhaps one about not trusting Abby with sensitive information."
Tony froze, remembering the last time he'd made Abby keep a secret.
Pressed against him, Ziva couldn't avoid noticing the sudden tension in Tony's body. "What is it?" she demanded.
He pulled away from her, trying to find the words. They both turned, startled, when the door jerked.
"We have to gear up, guys!" McGee shouted.
He spun back to her. "At home," Tony said.
Ziva nodded.
*
"So when did Abby keep a secret for you?" Ziva asked abruptly as they entered Tony's apartment that evening.
Tony glanced toward her. "What?"
"You got nervous when I said not to tell her secrets. Tony, I was an interrogator for many years."
He put on his charmingest grin. "And a damn good one."
She cocked her head. "Yes."
"Just...come here and sit down." He pointed to the couch.
Ziva sat, her brow knitting in worry as she watched Tony pace.
"Look..." He stopped in front of her. "There are still things we've never really talked about. And I don't want to wreck whatever this is, but I don't we should avoid them for the rest of our lives either."
Now Ziva's eyes went wide, a thousand things they'd never talked about flashing through her mind. "Go ahead," she said faintly.
Tony swallowed hard. "There was a day last spring when Ducky told me you'd been in a bombing in Morocco while I was at sea."
She nodded. "Yes."
He sat down next to her, studying his hands. "I went to watch the footage. There you were, laying on a gurney, bloody and incoherent." He closed his eyes, then opened them and found Ziva watching him sympathetically. "Later, when I remembered it, it felt like that was a premonition. Like that feeling I had when I saw you on the screen, that horror and loss and desperate need to unwish what was happening...like it was just a glimpse I didn't know I was having of your death." He sighed. "But at the time, I had Abby look into the man on the screen with you."
"Michael."
"Yeah," he snorted emphatically. "And she did it. And she kept it to herself, because I asked." He gave her a look. "And because we were both concerned about you."
Ziva smiled tightly, accepting the endorsement of Abby's secret-keeping. Then she shook her head, her eyes filling with pain again. "Why didn't you tell me you saw it then?"
Tony shrugged. "When I drove to your house that night, I was thinking about it." He saw her eyes widen as she realized which night he meant and grabbed for her hand. "Don't panic."
Ziva nodded.
"I hoped he was gone, that I could tell you how anxious I'd been ever since I saw it. Since I realized how close I had come to losing you." Ziva blinked quickly and Tony almost thought she was crying. "What is it?" he asked, concerned.
She shrugged helplessly. "If only he had been gone. Our lives would be so...so different. You wanted to unwish that bombing? There are so many moments I would change if I could, Tony."
"I know," he sighed. Then Tony sat up straighter. "But there is one rule I think we should have, after all of this. No secrets." Ziva shifted warily, and he began to defend the rule at once. "Ziva, secrets have never made our lives better. Every secret we've kept from each other has led to disaster." He saw her eyes widen and realization rushed over him with a wave of fear. Tony took a deep breath before making himself ask. "Or are there still more secrets?"
She squeezed her eyes shut. It felt like vertigo. Like falling. She was flashing back through time to another moment she had wished a thousand times she could redo. "I killed Ari," she whispered.
"Gibbs killed Ari," Tony said blankly, uncomprehendingly.
Ziva felt it like a kick in the stomach. She had known ten seconds ago that she had to tell him, that there could be no more secrets. Now she knew that with this admission she would no longer be worthy of Tony's love. She opened her eyes and shook her head slowly. "He would have killed Gibbs. I had to do it. I killed him."
Tony was on his feet at once, irate. "How could he?"
"Kill Gibbs?" She was confused.
He turned to her angrily. "How could Gibbs let you do that? Kill your own brother? What kind of--" He stopped when he saw a tear slip down Ziva's cheek. "What?"
She wiped it frantically away as Tony took a seat again, leaning in to rest a hand on her shoulder.
"Ziva?"
She shrugged helplessly. She didn't have the words to explain how stunned she was by the fact that after everything she had done, Tony leapt to her defense. "In my wildest dreams," she whispered, "I never hoped to be forgiven for it."
"But it wasn't your fault," Tony protested.
Ziva nodded, her eyes shining. Seeing his reaction, knowing this was Tony at his most honest, she believed it for the first time in nearly five years. "You're right," she said huskily, "about the secrets."
"No more," Tony said firmly.
"No more," Ziva agreed.