A/N: I've spoiled you thus far, with all the reviews for this month (not really, but let's say I did), so the next chapter I write will be for my other HP story, Rise of the Serpent. It's not fair of me to neglect my other readers. Then I'll update Pro Seditio (Pirates of the Caribbean, in case you were wondering), then this again. I'll try to keep up the cycle, but feel free to drop me a line if I don't get one up by the end of the first week of December. Read and Review people!

FYI: I looked up an actual calendar for the days of the week, and the calendar week begins on Monday in the UK and ends on Sunday. I'm American, so I had to make sure.

Chapter 32: Potions

The Tuesday edition of The Daily Prophet was interesting only because it featured a Quidditch column (called "The Tuesday Snitch") written by Lee Jordan.

"The Vultures won again this Sunday." Ron said, tossing me the paper.

"Who were they playing?" I asked, taking a bite of toast.

"The Cannons." came the sullen response.

Dean snorted. "Of course they won against the Cannons! They're the worst team in the league! It's a wonder they still let them play!"

"Shut it." Ron mumbled, his ears turning red.

"Leave off you guys, you know how he is about the Cannons. Hey," I said, nicking some of Seamus' bacon, "Ron, you think Victor would get us tickets to the cup if they went all the way?"

He only shrugged mouth full of bangers and hash. "Dunno. Might."

"I'll write him. Maybe Rein could come too."

"Who's Rein?" Seamus asked, missing his mouth and getting jam all over himself.

"Rein is Harry's girlfriend." Neville filled in. "She's actually rather pretty. Like Angelina…"

Conversation on our end of the table stopped as we all gawked at Neville.

"What?"

Xxx

"Wands away." Snape said as he strode into the dank Potions lab. "Mr. Boot, stop tormenting that arachnid and pay attention. I will not have your inability to focus on the task at hand set my classroom ablaze."

Arriving at the front of the classroom, he turned around and fixed Terry (who until that moment had been trying to transfigure each of the spider's legs into something different) with his piercing glare.

"Despite what many of you believe, this is not a class to be taken lightly. You are all here, and so one would assume that you are the best, as I only accept into my NEWT level classes, the best. You will complete all work assigned in a neat and timely manner, you will show the proper respect for myself and the property of both the school and you peers, and you will not, for any reason, attempt to ingest, sell, or administer any potion that you or your peers make in this lab. The potions you will be working with are both volatile and complex, and any distractions for any reasons will not be tolerated. Have I made myself clear?"

There was only silence to greet his words. "If you don't like my class," he continued silkily, you can just drop out. Understood?"

Only silence met his words. This class must really be difficult if he's offering to let us drop it. I mused.

"Professor?"

I sighed. Leave it to Granger to ask questions.

"Yes, Miss Granger? You wish to drop?" he answered as he gestured today's agenda onto the board.

"No, sir. It's just that… this class is for advanced potion-makers."

"Yes." He replied, irritated. "Your point?"

"Well.." here she hesitated, be it due to nerves or for dramatic effect, who knows. "If this class is for those who are advanced, then why is Harry in here? Surely he didn't receive an 'O' on his Potions OWLS?"

Somewhere behind me to the left I could hear Malfoy and his croons laughing. That… the nerve of her!

Snape, for all it was worth, feigned surprise. "What? Doth mine ears deceive me?" he mimicked, placing his hand on his chest for added flair, "Why lads, mark it on the calendar: Hermione granger does not know everything!"

Raucous laughter met my ears as the class erupted in gaiety.

"It is not my habit," he continued, raising his voice to be heard above the noise, "to disclose the OWL scores of my pupils, Miss Granger. However, to rectify your misinformed opinion, I shall, this once, betray my policy. Mr. Potter does indeed belong in this classroom. Not only did he receive an Outstanding on both his Potions practical and theory, he received the second-highest score in all of Hogwarts."

The laughter had tapered off during his speech, and was now replaced by quiet whispers of disbelief. You'd think they thought me an idiot.

"What?" came Hermione's whispered response. The class quieted. Well, most of the class.

"Oh ho ho!" Malfoy jeered. "I think Granger's angry. Could it be that she thought that she was the smartest in the room? Well, I'm not one for bragging, but if Potter's second and I'm first, then she would have to be third, at the very highest."

My eyes widened. I beat out Hermione? Awesome! Wait until I tell Ron!"

"Quiet down." Snape said, tapping his desk with his wand. "Mr. Malfoy, congratulations on your accomplishment. I award Slytherin House twenty-five points on your behalf. Miss Granger… please cease opening your mouth, lest you become more familiar with the taste of your foot than you are presently. Everyone else, the list for today's refresher potions are on the board. The first five are due at the end of class – begin."

Xxx

"And then Malfoy… Malfoy says that if I'm second and he's first'--"

"Wait Harry, slow down…" Ron said, leaning on my shoulder as his own shook in mirth. "I can hardly breathe what I'm laughing so much."

We entered the common room and flopped onto the couch, Dean, Seamus, and Neville not far behind.

"So," Nev said, leaning forward in his chair, "Malfoy said…"

"So he says," I continued, trying not to laugh, "if he's first and I'm second, then Hermione must would have to be third, at best! Mate I tell you, she was furious!And the look on her face!"

"What did Snape say?" Seamus asked, clutching his sides. "I'll bet he said something positively vicious!"

"He said, he told her that she should 'cease opening her mouth lest she become more familiar with the taste of her foot'!"

We were all doubled over in laughter with tears running down our faces when the portrait hole opened to admit Granger.

"Hey Hermione!" Seamus yelled, catching the attention of the entire room. "Harry was just telling us about Snape's class."

"Yeah," Dean added, "so tell us – how's your foot taste?"

Granger turned red and stalked up the stairs to the girl's dormitory.

"Uh oh," Neville said in a staged whisper, "I think she's angry."

"Who cares?" Ron said, laughing. "She's only third place!