his head felt like his brain was trying to break free from his skull. he opened his eyes only to shut them again even tighter trying to block out the blinding light. what had he done last night? he was almost certain he hadn't gone to a bar last night.
he opened his eyes again his eyes slowly adjusted to the light. the sun was directly over him but his cloths were still wet from sleeping on the ground and they stunk of sulphur.
"why am i outside?"
he sat up to find himself down by the lake where he had proposed to jess. he slowly pulled himself off the ground, grabbing hold of a branch to steady himself.
"whoh! how much did i drink last night!?!"
it wasn't until he was out of the park and spotted the impala that everything came rushing back. seeing his dad and dean. the weird yellow eyed man. the fire. Jess!
he sprinted round the corner to see smoke still coming from the top floor window. there were fire trucks, ambulances and squad cars scattered everywhere. he was about to race up to the nearest person and demand an explanation when they wheeleda gurney with a black body bag on it. it was like the whole world went into slow motion. he could barely breath.
"jess..............."
it was all his fault. he should have been here protecting her not off in some other state hunting vampires. he should have just sent bobby an invite but he had been hoping for some news of his brother. he only stayed because he wanted to do one last hunt with his brother because he thought it would be proberly the last time.
he hadn't known what he had been expecting, some kinda big family reunion. dean hadn't even reconised him! he had thought that was the worst he would ever feel, to have his brother, the person who was always there to look aqt him like he was a complete stranger and even worse was the cautious glances like he might stab him in the back if he took his eye off him for to long.
but that was nothing compared to the way he felt now. he should have been here to protect her. but instead she had died the same way as his mother all because he had become carelass and not put up any protection.
his thoughts wandered back to the impala briefly. what were his dad and dean doing here. they couldn't have known that there was a demon in the area, dad would have warned him.
it was only then that he spotted dean sitting on the steps to his apartment.. he looked miserable. he would only get short glimpses of him as he kept having top move out of the way of the many people rushing up and down the stairs, but he could tell.
but why was he so miserable? wait a minute did dean think he was dead?!
he was about to run over to dean when something stopped him. he could start over. go back to hunting. track down that son of a bitch who had killed Jess. he turned and started walking not sure where. he had no money and all his possesions had been destroyed in the fire.
he took one last look at dean before setting off promising he would tell dean he was alive after he killed the demon who had completely destroyed his life for the second time in 22 years.
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