Disclaimer: I own not, you speak not, I steal not, you sue not.

A/N: I dunno wha' you heard about me, but you ain't getting my Smirnoff for free. You can come and sit on my knee…but don't touch my P-I-N-T!

OBLIVION

Chapter 4

"Ha-Potter?" Severus shook his head distractedly. "Why are you talking to me? Go bother Lupin!"

"My boy, I'm afraid he can't talk to Remus right now. He's too wrapped up in Sirius' death and blaming himself." Albus leaned forward and looked over his glasses. "You can help him."

"I can…I, can help him?" Severus spluttered indignantly. "What can I do that Lupin can't?"

"Make him feel. Even if it's anger, you can make the poor boy look alive again. He's been so withdrawn…it's been worse recently. I wonder if it's just Sirius' death…"

'He'd wondered that too of course but he wasn't about to mention it.' "Have the other faculty members noticed Potter's despondency? Get McGonagall to talk to him or something!" He waved a hand irritably. "I will not go through what I did…last year with that boy again." Severus shook his head sharply. "Nosy interfering…" Tearing robes…Potter's petrified face. Pushing him. Potter falling. Wide teary eyes. Him sobbing. "…Albus?" Severus' face frowned in confusion. "I've…" 'I can't tell him. I can't tell him what I don't know! What in Hades is going on? "I've my own problems I can't deal with Potter's too." 'Considering he's one of my problems.'

"My dear boy. I'm…asking you please, restart the Occulmency classes with Harry. He will certainly listen to you now with what has happened. I know you and Harry have problems but if we are to fight the war against Tom together we must be united. You must work with him to overcome this…conflict."

"I've never hit him have I? That you know of?"

Albus blinked surprised for a moment. "Of course not!"

Severus nodded vaguely. 'Then why do I remember pushing him? It could be just that Albus doesn't know…' "I don't think Potter would want…"

"I will talk to him. He knows Occulmency is vital now. He will take the classes with you."

'Against his will. If I've ever hit him…I don't remember when but I remember doing it…I've hit him. He would hate me. He does, doesn't he? Albus is going to force him into lessons with a man he hates for hitting him against his will.' "I've pushed Potter before you know."

Albus smiled benignly. "The Shrieking Shack incident is long forgotten Severus. That is where you meant isn't it?"

"Yes…" 'Is that where it happened?' "I will teach him." 'I must talk to him. This all has to do with Potter I know it. I just don't…remember what happened!'

"Mr. Potter?" Harry looked up at McGonagall's strict tone from where he'd been wandering aimlessly down the corridor. "The Headmaster would like to see you."

Harry blinked, spine stiffening restrainedly. "Would you happen to know why?" He asked in a polite tone.

"No." Her eyes narrowed behind her spectacles.

"Okay." Harry flashed a faux-bright grin before spinning on his heel and heading back up the corridor for the Headmaster's office.

'Oh Gods. He's noticed! He's noticed Snape's cracking up and…maybe he talked to him! But Snape doesn't remember what happened. But he does know I was there! And if he mentioned that…is that why the Headmaster wants to speak to me?' Harry hesitated in front of the gargoyle before flinching minutely as it jumped aside.

Harry tried to stop his body's slight quivering as the stairs moved upwards with him on them and then stopped before the ornate door with the gryffin knocker. He lifted it and knocked once lightly before pushing the door open.

'Oh please don't let Snape be in here!'

"Harry?" Harry straightened and clenched his fists tightly before stepping forward into the room shutting the door behind himself.

The room looked fixed with all the silver instruments back where they'd been before his rampage last year. The table had been replaced and the décor was absolutely the same. Harry felt a pang of guilt at the destruction he'd caused before it turned to a different focus.

Sirius.

Harry tried to summon up his righteous anger from last year. If Dumbledore questioned him…pushed him too far…he wouldn't hesitate to strike out at the man again.

"Professor." Harry stopped before the desk andspurred himself on internally at his clipped tone.

"Harry have a seat." Harry inclined his head slightly before perching delicately on the chair. He was wound tight as a spring but he hoped Professor Dumbledore would put it down to last year, the last time he'd been here.

"Harry," Professor Dumbledore started, leaning into the table to give his small smile, eyes twinkling. "How are you?"

Harry blinked, off-guard inside. 'How am I? How am I?' Harry arched an eyebrow slowly. "I'm fine." He drew out the word questioningly.

"Are you? Are you handling your grief as you should my boy?" Albus' eyes turned somber as he looked over his glasses at Harry.

'This is more like it. Get to the point so I can rip you up and leave.' "Sure I am." Harry kept his words tight and hitched a fake smile on his face.

"You've become withdrawn…"

"I'll get over it." Harry cut in. "I mean, what's one loss in the name of the war right? Of course as long as it isn't me." He laughed bitterly. 'I've already been lost. You can't even save me now.'

"Harry I don't want you to look at Sirius' passing like that." Albus frowned.

"Okay I'll look at it like this then shall I?" He put on a chipper tone. "It's least my fault for not doing my Occlumency lessons properly because I wasn't told why they were so important. It's next most Snape's fault for not sticking it out with me and trying to put aside his problems with a dead man for the greater good. And it's most your fault for lying by omission, causing Sirius' death in the end." Harry blanked his face suddenly. "How's that?"

Albus looked down sadly at the table. "Accurate. But done is done Harry. And now Sirius is dead you must deal with how you feel. Destroying my office did last year for immediate relief but I think you need to…you need help Harry."

'Oh if only you knew.' "You aren't omnipotent." 'You don't know anything.'

"I never said I was Harry." Dim blue eyes looked into his wearily. "You never did master Occulmency."

Harry's eyes narrowed. "And?"

"And…you should. I've already spoken with Professor Snape…" 'NO!' "I believe he said you two met on Tuesdays and Thursdays?" 'No…I can't go back in a room with him alone!' "He's agreed to start back your classes and I promise Harry it will be better than last year. I think what happened…has taught us all how important this is." 'He's not in his right mind! He can't even remember the things most important in his own goddamn life! Suppose he addles my brain?' "You know the prophecy now Harry. You understand how important it is now. I know you will do your best." 'Suppose he…he rapes me again?'

"No…" Harry whispered shaking his head violently. "I…I won't do it!"

A/N: Ouh...I feel good!

J:...Frasier!