Chapter 32
Uther
Arthur woke his father at dawn; Uther was still tired and a little disoriented.
'Father the forest is nearby now,' he said reviving the fire with some sticks.
'How so Arthur? We are only just out of Camelot?'
'Trust me father it is nearby.'
Uther offered his hand so he could be helped up. He had grown weaker of late as though his gentler nature had worked on him too literally.
'Are you ready father?' asked Arthur, 'to do this?'
'Ready as I'll ever be my son…but I must tell you I am also afraid.' Arthur looked at him in surprise. Uther had never admitted fear before. He had scoffed at it and cursed when Arthur admitted it.
'What is it you fear father, the sorcerers you have killed?'
'No, what can they do to me? They can only take my life…what I fear most is that your mother will not forgive me and I will be forever abandoned to my own thoughts. I think that is the one thing I could not endure and yet I know I do not deserve to be forgiven.'
Arthur was silent. He had not yet spoken of forgiveness; he did not know how to speak of it.
'Come then Arthur,' said Uther suddenly. 'I am ready.'
The two men mounted their horses. Neither had wanted to eat or drink. Arthur went ahead and led the way. Uther unquestioningly followed.
*
Merlin stood in the centre of the circle of trees he held out his hands. In his mind the incantation of the forest and the stone had become a song playing in his head and below this song he heard Gaius' voice chanting and in his heart he felt the hammer blows of the smith. Now his mouth took up the words of an enchantment, from his hands flowed a dark red light, the colour of blood, which seeped into the ground. The grass curled and died, the soil below darkened and then began to peel away. In the red light a form rose out of the soil, the body of a woman rising up as if from a sleep. Merlin's hands drew her to him his words formed her from shadow into flesh and the woman Igraine stood before him. Her feet made no impression on the ground as she walked to him. She was exactly as he remembered her, as she was with Morgause. Igraine stopped before him. Her beautiful face wore a look of confusion. 'What am I doing here?' she asked in her low voice.
'You are here at my request my Lady to meet with someone, Are you willing?'
'Is it my son, shall I see him again?'
'I cannot tell you. What you must do is tell me if you are content to stay here now that I have called you.'
Igraine searched his face and saw in his iridescent eyes a lingering kindness then she smiled and answered him. 'I am content.'
Merlin recognised in her a familiar look but he could not quite figure out whom she reminded him of, his memory of Arthur was already fading, soon it would be as though he hardly knew him at all.
*
The King and his son came upon the forest at noon. They stopped just outside the canopy of the trees. Below the giants was a cool darkness where the trees entwined and locked arms as though defending their territory.
'I will leave you here father,' said Arthur... you must now go alone.'
Uther looked fondly at his boy. He could not say anything like a good-bye: his heart was in his throat. He held out a hand to Arthur's face. Their horses shifted and he was moved out of his reach. Uther lowered his arm. Then patted his horse's neck to quiet it. He dismounted and carefully led his steed into the forest picking his way through the tangle of undergrowth. He did not look back. Arthur watched him until the darkness swallowed him up, his heart heavy with trepidation. Uther may not fear the many he has slain but Arthur had watched them die too. Arthur had seen the terror and the hatred snarl out of the fires with a life of its own. The pictures in his head grew, monstrous pictures of agonies and revenge. Arthur dismounted, Merlin's words of warning returning to him. 'If you enter Heaf, the forest will do it's work, I cannot redeem you out of it. It will be as before, you will be tested and if you succeed you will be released, but if you fail you stay and I may not be able to bring you home.'
Arthur let these words slip to the back of his mind and led his horse into the forest.
*
When Uther entered the forest Merlin was aware of it. It was a ripple at the edge of his consciousness but something else was there at the edges something entering the forest that Merlin did not conjure though he felt it draw on him, he felt his energy flow out towards it, gathering it into the trees, gathering them into the trees and as they came fully into the forest he knew them, sensed each one's pain and anger, palpable and furious. He felt an unbearable heaviness in his limbs, a straining in his heart. The song of the enchantment wavered. The blows of the smith pounded painfully in his ears then became distant. Merlin could not hold onto it, could not hold onto himself. Merlin was falling.
*
In the forge Lillian was shouting...she watched Merlin falter saw the colour drain out of him. She called to Gaius but he did not hear her she yelled out to Brand but he could not stop, his hands were beating out the heartbeat of the forest. Lillian turned to Gwen.
'Guinevere!' she shouted 'hold him, hold, onto him!'
Guinevere ran to Merlin, Brand did not cease his blows on the swords. She held him around the waist just as he began to fall, he was heavy but she propped him up
'Now what?' she called to Lillian.
'He must not fall, keep him awake!' Gwen scouted about for something, water, anything to revive him but saw nothing within reach. Quickly she freed a hand and slapped him hard across the face. Suddenly he jerked into a standing position, his eyes closed. Gwen let him go, rubbing her arms as though she had been struck. Merlin, still pale and unsteady, uttered a name so quietly Gwen could not hear it properly then she caught it. He was mouthing it slowly steadily, hardly letting the words come over his lips.
'ascian Morgana ascian'
In the light of the forge a grey smoke appeared that did not come from the fire. Gwen stepped away from Merlin she looked at Lillian who returned a reassuring look. They watched transfixed as the smoke took the form of a woman, tall and dark. Gwen's heart leapt, before she came fully out of the smoke she knew her. Morgana stood before them alive and well. Morgana saw Gwen first and went to embrace her but Lillian held up her hand to stop her.
'No! It is Merlin who needs you.' Morgana turned and Merlin looked at her, his eyes golden and unseeing. He held out his hand.
'Help him!' begged Lillian.
Morgana reached out to Merlin, as she took hold of him her eyes mirrored his. He placed his hand over hers. She felt a surge of his strength, it flowed through her and back to him and then he let her go. Gwen was quickly beside her. Morgana put her arm around her friend whose face was riddled with concern.
'It's fine Gwen, he didn't hurt me.'
'What is he doing?' asked Gwen.
'He is raising the dead,' said Morgana simply.