AN: I had a friend come through and read all my fanfictions, and she came to me with improvements she thought I could make. Or should I say, improvement. She told me my only problem is that my author's notes aren't long enough. Well...that isn't going to change. :)

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"As I was saying..." Watari the butler began.

"As you were saying," King Mogi nodded. He knew his son's future relied on the words of the wise servant, and also the future of the kingdom he was about to inherit. It was kind of a big deal.

"Yes," Watari said, being as serious as the situation called for, "I may be able to assist the prince in his search for a wife. As you know, I was a lowly traveller when I first came to this palace, my clothing thin and ragged as I was myself, unable to gather even the small amount of coins needed for a simple loaf of bread. Your majesties took me in then, overlooking my dishevelled appearance and giving me the position of royal butler. It is time I repaid that debt to this family." He looked at the prince and sighed. "I know of a land of very unattractive men."

Prince Raito was surprised by this, but was polite enough to let the man continue and didn't even think of trying to leave the table while he thought the narrator and the other characters weren't looking.

"Good idea," Queen Soichiroko said solemnly, "We'll get him on a boat right away."

"It's unconventional, but it may be our only way to get him married before his birthday," the king agreed, "If the people find it odd, we can just dress our son up as a woman and say that he always secretly was one."

"I haven't finished, you know..." Watari said.

"I'm liking this idea more and more," Queen Soichiroko said. "Send a servant to go and prepare the boat. We can't waste any time, it's only five days until he turns eighteen and then we're stuck with whichever second cousin he can dig up as a daughter-in-law."

"I think you'll find it's seven days, my dear."

"I was kind of hoping you'd let that one slide," she laughed at her mistake, which was entirely forgivable considering the overwhelming concern she felt knowing that her son was soon going to be far from her side and good judgment. The king, seeing her worry, drew her close to him in a romantic manner.

King Mogi held her close and told her gently, "Sorry I missed that. It won't be the last chance we get, though. Oh? Ah, right. My love, you are too wonderful, feeling such concern for our child as he moves closer to adulthood. As a wife, you are already so beautiful, but as a mother I cannot keep my eyes away. Let me comfort you as only a lover can," he said and leaned in to kiss her. Their mouths moving closer, the distance between them falling away and the anticipation that they both felt rising within them, this was truly a perfect moment.

...

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...

"...what?" Raito asked, somewhat confused to have everyone around the table staring at him. When nobody gave him an explanation, he turned to L questioningly. L simply watched him, as if trying to read his expression, before looking away.

"How disappointing..." Mogi said, running a hand through his hair.

"Maybe we need to try harder?" Yagami-san wondered.

The expression on Mogi's face suddenly became resolute. He gave Yagami-san a look that the other man somehow seemed to understand, and turned his body towards him where he sat. Raising his hand he moved it slowly to rest on Yagami-san's shoulder. The two both looked at Raito.

The youth just returned their gaze, not completely uncomprehending but certainly unaffected by the action. Matsuda, who watched Raito's face intently, said, "Nothing."

Yagami-san and Mogi shared another look, and a button of the former's shirt was undone carefully. Loosing his tie, Mogi slipped his hand just under the collar of Yagami-san's shirt, skin touching skin. The two looked at Raito.

"Nothing," Matsuda said again.

Solemnly Mogi undid another button, pushing the shirt open slowly to reveal the skin of Yagami-san's neck. Almost hesitantly he moved closer, lowering his head so that his cheek brushed lightly against Yagami-san's warm skin as his chest rose with his breathing. After a few moments he closed his eyes and kissed it, his lips caressing the softness that had lain beneath the shirt. "Ah!" the colour rose in Yagami-san's cheeks and he covered his mouth with his hand to prevent himself from making any more sounds. Pulling away, Mogi looked up at him, and after a moment had passed they looked at Raito.

Completely unperturbed. "No again," Matsuda told them.

The two men looked at each other, apparently contemplating what would happen next. Yagami-san had just closed his eyes and Mogi leaned in to him when the door came crashing to the ground.

Stepping out over it an attractive blonde figure pulled a gun from his waist and raised it. "L! I have-" he shouted, breaking off when he noticed Yagami-san with his open shirt and Mogi with his hand partially beneath it, and the rest of the group simply sitting there. "Whoa, what am I interrupting..."

"We're playing a game," L explained.

"O...kay," he shrugged off his surprise and raised the gun higher. "Yo! L! I'm here to help you out! And look," he reached behind him and pulled out from the doorway a smiling Misa, who waved brightly at everyone. "I brought you a woman!"

"Misa-misa!" Matsuda cried happily.

"Manager-kun!" Misa beamed at him.

Letting go of her arm, the blonde pushed past her and sat down beside L, throwing his gun uncaringly on the table. "And this is why you should invite me over more often," he told him, leaning back in his chair and resting his hands behind his head.

"I don't have that many doors, Mello," L replied somewhat wryly.

"Ah," the newcomer smiled at him. "Just as well. I don't have that many women."

"Thankyou all the same," L nodded at him and then turned to address Mogi and Yagami-san. "You can redress now." Exchanging a quick look Yagami-san and Mogi hurried to right themselves.

When Misa had seated herself between Raito and Matsuda and everybody had gotten themselves fairly settled, Matsuda as self-declared leader of the day's activities spoke up. "Before we do anything, I'm just going to ask: why didn't you react, Raito?"

"Oh. It seems to me like I'm not going to get anywhere the way I've been doing this so far, so I've decided to calm down a little and work on concocting my plan for revenge," Raito told him easily.

'You should probably work on the getting a wife bit first," Mogi commented.

At this Misa stood suddenly, and almost immediately sat back down again, an odd look on her face. "Misa-chan?" Matsuda asked, concerned.

"Ah, it's nothing," the girl smiled painfully at him, brushing it off.

"We broke up," Raito said bluntly.

A silence fell over the room, with Misa looking crestfallen and Raito being apparently unapologetic. At his seat a bored Mello began to spin his gun absently.

"Okay! So Misa-misa will be the neighbouring country's princess who is at the palace for a visit, and Mello will be the marksman who the king hires to...well, you'll all find out when we come to it. Does that sound fine to everyone?" Matsuda attempted to break the silence, earning a round of affirming murmurs from the others.

He started when Mello rose from his chair without any warning and walked purposefully around the table to stop beside Misa. Lifting her chin roughly he leaned down and kissed her. When he pulled away, he smiled at her. "Just a little icebreaker," he laughed.

Walking back to his seat, Mello stopped again at L's, leaning over him to quickly touch his lips to his own. "And that's because you left Matt and I lonely."

"Lonely together," L pointed out.

"Lonely all the same," Mello replied, half-serious, and finally sat back down.

The silence stretched on, until Matsuda whispered quite loudly, "Watari, go!"

"In my travels I encountered a land of very unattractive men," Watari the butler told them. "The women of that land, though as beautiful, intelligent and virtuous as those of any other nation, are accustomed to men with flaws such as those of the prince's. If Prince Raito were to travel there, he would surely encounter a woman fitting his tastes and willing to marry him in return."

Queen Soichiroko and King Mogi saw this to be a very good option and a lot better than the transvestite prince one, the king feeling this way because he wasn't sure he could handle seeing his son wearing his beautiful wife's dresses and the queen because, on second thought, she wasn't sure she did have any outfits in his size and really didn't want him to stretch her clothes. So they thanked the butler for being so wise and asked him where this country of unattractive men was.

"It is not at all far. In fact, I came here from that particular country, poor as I was and lacking even a horse for transportation," Watari told them, "If he travelled by carriage, the prince could reach there in a matter of hours – days – weeks – no, days. Three days. Four days? That's a little cruel, isn't it? Five days. It would take the prince five days to reach this land by carriage."

The royal parents again thanked the butler and immediately ordered that a carriage be prepared. It took a matter of moments for the carriage to be ready and Prince Raito to be sent on his way to the unattractive man country to find himself a bride.

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AN: Pandemonium! Chaos! Havoc! This is what one would call a 'setting up' chapter. Basically, I used this one to introduce new characters, play on existing relationships...just run wild, really. Misa and Raito couldn't be together for this one, so they've broken up. Where is Mello's other half? Hmm. I haven't decided yet. Probably somewhere equally chaotic.

The MogixYagami-san will stop, I swear! I've been suppressing this desire to write a fanfiction about them for a long, long time, and it kind of bubbled over. Matsuda seems to be shipping them a little in his narration, though...that man is beyond hopeless. Oh, and if you've read my other stories Mello's entrance was meant to be a tribute to one of them - I love him getting all violent and disruptive. And kissing everyone? Sure. Why not. Forgive the craziness, if you could, I'm having far too much fun to stop now.