I dislike saying this BUT Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds, if I did we'd see a lot more going on if you get my gist....
When Derek made it back in he noticed the eerie silence that masked is house and as he let Clooney of the leash he stood still listening for life. 'Baby girl!' He called out and without success, he went into the house, he saw her coffee cup still sitting on the counter, the house was just how he left it. 'Pen!' He called out and went further into the living room, turning to head upstairs in search he saw a note pinned to the fridge, the magnets holding it on spelling out Baby Girl. He smiled at it and put the paper out.
Sorry baby, mamma had to shoot home. I'll come by later. Sorry again handsome. BG x
He ran a hand over his head and grabbed his cell, as her number rang he turned and looked at his surroundings, something wasn't right. It was then he saw the box on the shelf wasn't back as far as he remembered it and he snapped the phone shut.
Turmoil over took him then as his eyes stared at the box, anger grew that she'd just disobey him, and then fear took him as she wasn't around and he knew that whatever she'd seen had made her run. Devastation washed over him as the emotions rolled on and continued to be ever changing.
He dragged himself to the shower and stuck it on cold, he didn't know what the hell to do now, he was at a loss and he never thought he'd feel this broken. Taking a shower didn't help, ringing Penelope didn't help because she didn't answer, sleeping was impossible, so he ended up going out for a walk, a walk where he didn't stop until a storm took over and although it was still boiling the rain pattered day lightly and he headed back. Going back he just stared absentmindedly at the floor in front of him. He took each step of his porch slowly and then was met with his door, and a box.
Frowning he picked it up and opened the door to his house, leaving it on the coffee table he went and changed into dry clothing before coming back down stairs and sitting in front of it. Slowing he slipped the lid off and set it next to it. Looking in his heart thudded, its pace growing and intensifying the more stuff he took out. Holding a sheet with Penelope's hand writing on he just read it and his hands shook all over again.
Read it in your order Derek. X
He looked over the stuff, he knew what she meant and the first thing he grabbed was a group of three emails.
You
* Eyes I drown in happily.
* Lips that I would die to kiss, if only once.
* A physique I could run my hands over.
* A laugh that's like my own drug.
* Talk that I'll yearn for perpetually.
* Love that I bask in ceaselessly.
* Heroism that makes me swoon each and every time.
* You, my one and only.
Derek sighed; his heart had clamped itself at that moment as he went onto the second piece of paper.
Thou art to me a delicious torment. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson~
If I know what love is, it is because of you. ~Herman Hesse~
Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile. ~Franklin P. Jones~
If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand. ~Anonymous~
For you see, each day I love you more. Today more than yesterday but less than tomorrow. ~Rosemonde Gerard~
When you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out. ~Elizabeth Bowen~
In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. ~Janos Arnay~
So many times I thought I would never find someone to love me the way I needed to be loved. Then you came into my life and showed me what true love really is. ~Anonymous~
Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within. ~James Baldwin~
I love you - those three words have my life in them. ~Alexandrea to Nicholas III ~
Derek's mind buzzed with the words, a different buzz to what he'd felt as he'd read his quotes for Penelope's and he just took a few moments before continuing on to the last email.
You'll have to measure your life starting from now Handsome.
That was all it said and he let the email's drop before he proceeded, he found a piece of damp bark and he looked at it, this one had his name all over it and in Penelope's own dragging, Mrs Penelope Morgan. It was like being in high school all over again. Except for scribbling love for someone on a notebook it was on a tree. Setting the bark down he continued to look, there were photo's of him, and he had to beat that these were all the stored photo's Penelope had of him because there was roughly the same amount as he had.
Smiling some he looked for the next part, finding it, he relaxed back into the couch and opened the paper up.
As I'm standing here
And you hold my hand
Pull me towards you
And we start to dance
All around us
I see nobody
Here in silence
It's just you and me
Derek's eyes flashed over the first set of lyrics, he wondered if this was what Penelope felt whenever she danced with him, if this was how she felt every single time he had her in his arms and danced with just her.
Who Knows what tomorrow brings
In a world. Few hearts survive
All I know, is the way I feel
When it's real, I keep my pray alive
The road is long
There are mountains in our way
But we climb steps every day
Love lifts us up where we belong
He had to smirk, trust Penelope to bring the likes of Disney into this. It was another thing like that that made his heart swell with emotions for her.
You are the one
Who makes it worth waking up in the morning
I'd trade the sun for the chance to show you I'm all in
We could be like Jay and Beyonce
Bonnie and Clyde just like the movie
Take that chance on love (yeah yeah)
Now i can't predict what the future holds
But I'll fight forever to keep you close (yeah)
I'd give it all up baby
trade in the world to show I'm falling,
I'm falling (yeah)
Derek could fell his heart regaining it's rhythm as he continued to read, his love had once been poured out and now Penelope's was doing exactly the same.
Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air
I know I can count on you
Sometimes I feel like saying "Lord I just don't care"
But you've got the love I need To see me through
Sometimes it seems that the going is just too rough
And things go wrong no matter what I do
Now and then it seems that life is just too much
But you've got the love I need to see me through
Looking at those set of lyrics Derek smiled, he felt exactly the same towards Penelope, she helped him and now he knew he helped her how he had proud he had.
From the Moment I saw you,
From the moment I looked into your eyes
There was something about you
I knew I knew
That you were once in a life time
A treasure near impossible to find
And I know how lucky I am to have you
After finishing the last set of lyrics Derek let the paper's drop onto his lap, he didn't know what to do next, he knew what followed on his set sequence of events, he just didn't know if he was ready to read another heartfelt letter. After a moment of contemplation he sat forward and grabbed the letter.
Fiddling with it in his hands he just stared at it, ran his fingers over it, anything but look at it and then he decided that he was done being a coward, he had nothing to be scared of anymore. The proof was all in front of him as it was, there was no denying that.
So he unfolded it and began to read.
You're right Hot Stuff, kicking starting this as a Dear or a To would be too wrong for either of us. Dear John letter's start that way and we know how they end and this piece of paper is far, far, far from that.
To me I'd describe our relationship as topsy turvy, eccentric, unique, nauseating, loveable, adoring, and unmiss-able. You pull me up, I pull you up, that's the way we roll now isn't it stud? Ever since day one, since the "Hey Baby girl?" moment where I turn and question you with my thick sultry politeness "Baby Girl?" I ask you and you give me a weak version of that full wattage smile and open those luscious lips. "Forgive me; I just didn't know the real..." I smirk at that and cut in. "I've been called worse." I tell you and step forward and ask what you need and then BAM just like the Morgan-Garcia duo were born and here we are, 9 years on.
Think for one moment I'd forgotten that and I will smack you upside your head good and proper. I think I dream that day all over again just so that I can get the purity of meeting you all over again because the moment I saw you standing in front of me I fell instantly in love and I've only gotten deeper ever since.
Problem was there are leagues. There's the girl's I've spent years observing you dance with. Those stick thin model wannabe's and then there was me, the total opposite and I doubted me as me. I knew a woman like me, with my curves and my glasses could never get a man like you and I could satisfy myself with what I could get from time to time but each time jealously flared because some Barbie was getting what I wanted.
I learnt to be the Baby Girl in your life Derek, ages ago I learnt that. Then before Battle I truly believed that you were jealous but you didn't say that, you just acted out and it ended badly. The night you got me home from the hospital and told me you loved me confused me. I wanted it to be a 'I'm In Love With You Penelope Garcia' but it was just "Hey Silly Girl...You know I love you right?" and there was no more, we didn't talk about it after that and then Kevin came along and I'm sorry if I ever, ever made you believe that I went with him because I didn't love you because I would die for you. If I was asked to die for you, I would do it in a heartbeat; I would take whatever pain was dealt my way to keep you safe. I love you too much and for that reason I cherish your life and have done.
We've made mistakes throughout both our lives and we've both become stronger and weaker from it. I told myself years ago I would never, ever, for the life of me, tell you I loved you, that I was in love with you, that I dream of you from time to time because I value what we have right now far too much to let it falter and fail and disappear from my life forever.
You said I'm your breath, well Derek, it work both ways. You're my stud muffin, my hunk of burning love, the man that protects me, the man that makes me smiles when all I want to do is cry and forget, you brought me ice cream, stood on my doorstep until I let you in, you waited for me, you and patience while I gathered myself back together post-breakup. It's moments like that in my life that my hearts swells and pounds because the love of my life is just so close yet so far away and that thought cripples me.
I love you Derek Morgan, always have and always will, no doubt about it. Whatever happens, I'll forever be Penelope Garcia, you're one and only baby girl, never forget that handsome.
Love Penelope
P.S. The most eloquent silence, that of two mouths meeting in a kiss. ~Anonymous~
I want to hear this silence one day.
He kept the letter in his hands as his eyes watered, she loved him, like he loved her. It was all in black and white, pure and simple in front of him. He leant forward and looked all the stuff in front of him, everything mirrored his box. Except one more envelope.
Taking it he opened it hastily and pulled the sheet out.
Wanna talk about it? Meet me at our place at 1pm
Looking at the time he saw that he was going to be beyond late and ignorant of the weather he ran for the door with his keys and wallet just making his grasp.
A/N: Thanks Kricketwilliam's for the help with songs, I'm still in shock at how fast you were! LOL
Hope you liked where I went with this!! =)
Songs:
Colbie Caillat – Fallin' For You
Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes - Up Where We Belong
Jason Derulo – Falling
Florence and the machine – You Got The Love
John Bickerman - Beautiful