A/N: Well, last night I barely had a single nightmare over the promo, so that's encouraging. XD Are you ready for the CB confrontation? Are you? *gasp* I'm gonna try to use all the dialogue from the promo that I can for this one intense scene. *gulp* I hope you enjoy. Please review! =D
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Ch.3—All This Heartbreak
Someone grabbed hold of her hand. By its feel and texture and the way it wrapped so fiercely around her graceful fingers, she knew exactly who it was. She tried to pull away but his hand held fast. When she finally spun around to meet his piercing brown eyes, he released her.
"Blair?" the man she'd come with asked from down the hall. He'd just gone to grab her jacket and then they were going to leave for their date. The schemes for the evening had gone about successfully, and she no longer needed to act the part of Chuck's date.
Her head turned to greet his questioning eyes.
"I'll be just a minute, Cameron. Wait for me outside," she said politely. The man nodded briefly and gathered their coats up in his arms, heading for the exit.
Blair's head swiveled around to greet Chuck's determined gaze once more.
"What do you want, Chuck? The night is over."
He almost didn't speak, and she almost left, but then his lips parted and she could not make herself move a single inch. She did not look it, but she was certainly enraptured with him and whatever he was trying to do.
"It's not just me you can't forgive."
She blinked, hardly expecting this route in regards to getting her back. And she knew he was trying to. He'd been trying it all evening and most often she played it off as nothing, so she didn't have to feel the pain of rejecting him. Her heart still burned so intensely for him, even if she told herself she could never go back.
"It's you, too," he told her.
She sighed, sounding annoyed. "Yes, I know, Chuck. But what's done is done and I don't plan on going back, so if you could just—"
"I did the most dangerous thing when I told you I loved you."Her mouth snapped shut at his words, and she found she could not look away. There he was again, using his love as a tool to lower her defenses. "If I got through my fear for you, you can get through yours for me."
His hand gently cupped her cheek for a moment as he spoke and she found her eyes closing at the contact. The feel of him consumed her and his words ran over her like sweet summer honey. It was intoxicating and she knew she had to get out of there
"You're never going to be safe," he said, causing her eyes to snap open. Somehow he'd seen the cause to her break-up, the true cause of where it'd originated from. "I know you're afraid you'll do something horrible because of how you feel, but there's no such thing as loving too much, Blair. All you have to do is create boundaries for yourself."
Her lips parted and she wanted to say something but found she could not.
"I know you've forgiven me," he said softly. Her eyebrows narrowed.
"You don't know that," she said, hating that he quite possibly had the upper hand. He was most definitely toying with her emotions and she didn't like that. She didn't like that her control over the situation had completely slipped out of her grasp.
"Two days," he told her, ignoring her defense. She looked at him strangely, not understanding. "I will be on the top of the Empire State building," he said. "If you're willing to take another chance on us, then meet me. We'll figure this out." Her lips parted, and a gnawing desire to do exactly what he said but right at that moment was threatening to eat her alive. She was so very tense, even if he could not see it.
"But if you don't come," he continued, "then I'll close my heart to you forever."
A breath caught in her throat and she felt her eyes watering. She cursed herself for being so affected by him and his words but she could not help her emotions. She hated that he'd put up such an ultimatum. Sure, he had broken her heart and she'd made it clear it'd been too much for her actually to stay with him, but what if miraculously something happened in the future and she couldn't stand to be without him? Did that really mean he wouldn't let her in if she didn't come meet him in two days? The thought made her furious and suddenly she was very angry by the proposition he'd put up to her. She hated it, hated him and his ultimatum.
"Blair?" a wandering Cameron re-entered the building. He couldn't see her and Chuck but she had called for her and her mind jolted back to the fact that she was supposed to be on a date with him, on a date with a guy she hadn't known her whole life and who she could start out fresh with. With Chuck's words washing over her though, she began to wonder if he were right, and if no one really would measure up to what they had.
"Coming!" she called to him, briefly turning away from Chuck. Her dress swooshed with her and it seemed the only sound in the entire building, despite the numbed buzzing of socialites chatting it away in the distant ballroom.
She saw as Cameron left the building once more, not looking annoyed in the least, and suddenly she felt she had to get away. She had to escape whatever the hell Chuck was offering, because she'd given him so much of herself and he'd taken advantage of it and broken her heart.
"I have to go, Chuck," she said pointedly, when she could not stand looking into his hopeful, heart-wrenching face a moment longer. She turned to move away and actually got a considerable distance when he called to her. Cautiously she turned back around to face him, her heart beating a million miles a second. Slowly he walked towards here.
"Two days," he said.
"Chuck," she almost whined, her eyes closing and her head briefly shaking because she was so very overwhelmed at the offer he'd put on the table.
"Are you brave enough or aren't you?"
Her eyes snapped to his, wide and unmoving. Her lips parted in an almost gasp and she could not make herself turn away. She felt like she was glued to the floor, caught up in some wet cement trap and that her eyes could not stop sinking into hers. Not a moment longer, Chuck cupped her chin in his hand again and moved past her. Very slowly she turned to watch him walk away, and went to Cameron out on the street who was eagerly waiting for her.
Chuck entered the lobby at The Empire and felt the shaking that had progressed throughout the ride home significantly increase. He couldn't be sure that she'd seen the blast yet, but he was banking on that she had. He wasn't going to just let her go like he'd told her he was going to three days ago. He loved her too damn much and her showing up, even if it was a day late, meant she did too. He was going to stop pitying himself and fight for the woman he loved.
Blair strode out of the elevator in a fury. She didn't spot him on instant but soon after her fiery gaze met with his and she exploded into endless sparks of fire. She didn't want to talk to him. She just wanted to kill him. He had broken her heart all over again, before it had even completely mended. And what was worse was that he lied to her. He could have told her that morning, just to be decent and honest, and then at least she could have given him credit for that. But no, he hadn't. And now she knew the truth. There was no way she'd ever take him back. She wanted him out of her life. Permanently.
Chuck's eyes lit up when he saw Blair walk out of the elevator. A queasy feeling bubbled in his stomach when he saw the scorned, hurt look on her face. And when he saw the attempt she was making to just ignore him and move past him, forget he existed, all manner of sanity escaped him. His eyes widened in panic.
"Blair, wait—" he called out to her, grabbing onto her arm. She spun around to face him but snapped her arm away immediately. Her eyes were angry and he was sure if it were humanly possible, there would be smoke coming out of her ears and nostrils.
"What, Chuck?!" she was close to screaming at him and he couldn't tell if she was actually holding herself back or if more was just adding on to the second. "Is there something you'd like to tell me?" she fumed.
"Blair—"
"I came for you, Chuck," she said before he could continue. "I freaking put my life on hold, because you had convinced me that maybe we were still worth it, maybe we could get past the horror that was the last month of our life, but once again!" she spat, "you proved me wrong." Her eyes narrowed.
He felt broken, but he couldn't help the swell of anger that steadily rose to the surface.
"You didn't come for me, Blair," he said, low and dark.
"Dorota was in labor!" she shrieked.
"You didn't come. I waited there until midnight. There was no word from you. I thought that was it. You made me believe that was it."
She scoffed. "Don't try to pin this on me, you Basstard. You couldn't wait one day before fucking some slut, and of course it just happened to be—"
"Jenny Humphrey meant no—"
"Don't say her name!" she shrieked. Her entire body was convulsing against her and she felt like she was going to explode. When she'd gotten the blast, she felt herself shatter into a million pieces. Dan had tried to comfort her in some way, but she had hardly registered his presence. Then they'd taken off for The Empire. Blair was sure she'd catch them in the act and then that would be the end for him, for Chuck and Blair.
"Why did you do it?!" she huffed, almost crying. Her eyes were still flaming anger.
"I thought you didn't love me anymore!"
She didn't know if she was more furious at what he'd done or what he'd thought to make him do what he did. It'd been a month. She'd known no one, herself included, to get over someone so quickly, especially someone that meant so much as Chuck did to her.
"So, you did this to get back at me?! To turn me into some cold-hearted bitch who'll never find love because I can't get the fucking picture of you and—" she couldn't say her name. It horrified her too much. So, she just paused, screamed with her mouth closed and her eyes squeezed shut before she looked at him again. "Out of my head!" she finished. He wasn't sure but he thought the sound of her voice might be crossing the line into sobs.
She told herself she wasn't going to cry. She was too furious to. She would scream and yell and spew insults and hurtful things at him and then she would leave, and then she would cry. When she got home and she was alone, she would cry forever for what they'd been and how he'd completely broken her until the point where she just couldn't feel anymore.
And she didn't cry. Her eyes just blazed at him in anger. She wanted to take the flowers that she'd accidentally left in his suite and rip them to shreds. She wanted there to be no memory of happiness between them and only anger and hate. She wanted to be rid of him forever.
"I didn't cheat on you!" he said, and her eyes widened at what he was using to justify himself.
"You might as well have!" she cried out. There were no tears seeping from her eyes and she didn't plan on there being any, but she had to fight to keep the anger as evident to his eyes as she could. Her voice lowered as she continued. "We may have still been broken up when it happened, but you made me believe in us again," her breath caught in her throat, and he found the same effect bestowed on him. "After you offered up that horrible ultimatum, I believed that we could try again and maybe we'd work and maybe we'd be even better than before. I took a step outside of my heartbreak and gave you another chance because I realized I could not live with myself if you shut me out forever!"
She was screaming at him now and he didn't know how to react, how to function.
"You didn't show!" he found himself shouting back. Her angry face didn't change and he knew he couldn't possibly use the excuse again. It was all he had, but it was pathetic and it did not make up for the angry pain engrained so deeply on her face.
She nodded, angry. "And so you stuck to your promise, didn't you? To your threat," she spat at him, "you said if I didn't come, you'd shut me out forever."
"Blair—" he sounded so weak now. All he wanted was her. It was a stupid threat, but he just wouldn't let himself live his life, even just possibly, drowning in how he'd lost Blair Waldorf. He'd nearly become an alcoholic when he'd done that in high school and he did not plan on wasting his life away, with the aching hope that maybe they would come back together again.
"I guess forever started at 12:01, didn't it?" her voice was quiet, angry, filled with hatred and hurt. She despised him like none other and it made him burn inside at the thought of her crying over this later that night. He'd known she would break and he'd just wanted to get it over with, but now that he was at the scene of the crime, he wished he hadn't been so eager to go through with it.
Before he could respond to her words though, or even think of how to respond, the ding of the elevator interrupted them and Chuck steadied himself, prepared to play off to whatever guest at the hotel that nothing out of the particular was happening.
"You son of a bitch," was heard directly behind, coming toward him. Chuck had heard the voice before, and with venom attached too.
"That, is my little sister!"
He knew what was coming even as he turned around. Dan Humphrey's fist came into harsh contact with his face and he swore it hurt worse than it had the first time. The pain was unbearable, most likely because now there were feeling involved. He didn't have to second guess that. When Dan had punched him the first time, he'd been physically hurt, offended and pissed, but now Dan's punch held so much more meaning to it. And that meaning was also attached to Blair.
"I can't even look at you," he scoffed, looking away. "I can't believe," he continued, talking slowly so as to emphasize every word, "that I was stupid enough to think you'd grow up and be a decent person."
Chuck's lips parted as he tried desperately to search for an answer.
"I…"
"You took my sister's virginity! My little sister!" Blair cringed at the words, despite what it meant for her and Chuck. It was burning Dan too.
Chuck's eyes were wide, panicked, and searching.
"And look what you did to Blair!" he shrieked, waving his hand about in a wild gesture to the brunette in green standing beside him. Blair was shocked to say the least when he defended her but was still too angry at Chuck to acknowledge it. Chuck felt a similar way and pain flashed across his eyes at the angry, assaulting words that he knew he very much deserved.
He scoffed. "You've got nothing to say," he shook his head at him. "You've got nothing to fucking say?!" he was screaming at Chuck and even Blair was blown away by his behavior. Somehow it was so much more severe than hers had been, and she had literally torn him to pieces. Neither of them had seen Dan like this, acting so violently.
Dan moved towards Chuck again, obviously planning on punching or pushing him around some more but Blair pulled him away. Dan accepted the restraint surprisingly but his eyes were still dead set on Chuck's.
"Let's go," Blair told Dan, eager to get away from this place, especially with so many memories intact and Dan's ferocity beginning to scare her. Dan did not seem to be aware of her request. "Dan," she requested again. Maybe he had heard her but he made no effort to show it. With her holding him back by his shoulders, he took one more dangerous step towards Chuck.
"Where is she?" he demanded, his voice low. Chuck stared at him, dumbfounded. "Where is she?" he ground out again. Chuck tried to find the air in him and around him to breathe, but was having difficulty trying to do so.
"I…I don't—"
Dan scoffed, turning away. "Oh, that's rich. That's real rich," he walked away from him, pacing a little, completely infuriated to the point of maybe he could have killed Chuck at that moment if the security cameras had not been on and Blair had not been there to witness the event.
Chuck sighed, his eyes deadpanned on Dan Humphrey. "I told her to leave this morning after Blair came over. I didn't want—"
"She was in your suite when I came over?!" Blair shrieked, her voice sounding smaller somehow and so incredibly hurt. Chuck's gaze shifted to hers and she looked away from him, unable to stand the sight of his pleading eyes that held nothing but guilt.
"Blair…"
"I can't believe you did this to me." She heaved a shaky sigh and ran a hand through her hair, turning to Dan before he lunged himself at Chuck again. "Come on, Dan. Let's get out of here."
Dan did not look anywhere near ready to agree to the idea, but her pleading eyes won him over, along with her restraining arms. He had not realized up until that moment that Blair Waldorf actually had some strength in her arms.
"I don't want to be here anymore," she stressed. Finally he stopped struggling and looked at her, sympathetically it seemed. "Don't make an idiot out of yourself by doing something stupid you'll regret later." He blinked, and a part of him wanted to argue that it wasn't stupid if it was defending his sister's honor. But he saw the hidden hurt in her; the way she looked at him was as if she was looking at Chuck the night before, directly before he had slept with Jenny.
"We've already seen how that ends up." With a teary sigh, she released him and walked towards the exit. Dan was heartbroken for her and his face fell. Before she'd reached the doors, he made to follow her, leaving Chuck with a heated glare on his departure.
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It took over an hour, but Blair Waldorf tracked down Jenny Humphrey wallowing in her sorrows and guilt on the far side of the city. The brunette hadn't wanted to attack her right there on the spot, so she arranged for two separate cars to take them to the rooftop of one of the looming skyscrapers in the middle of the city. Jenny didn't want to know what to say to her. The fact that she had hardly said anything to her in broad daylight where people might overhear was an immediate tip-off. When she refused to share the same car with her, that made her even more nervous.
She was nervous and she didn't say anything. There they stood on the top of an anonymous skyscraper in the great New York City, and she didn't say a word.
"I think you know what I brought you here for, Jenny."
Hesitantly, Jenny looked up from the spot she'd glued for eyes to for the last ten minutes or so, since they'd been up there, and she found Blair's deep brown orbs. She wasn't shaking, but Blair must have seen the fear ready to pop from her eyes. Still, she didn't say anything.
"I talked to Chuck this morning," Blair continued.
"I-I know," Jenny said very quietly, not realizing her mistake until afterwards.
"Of course you do. You were still there when I got there."
Jenny closed her eyes in agony and swallowed hard. When she opened her eyes again, Blair was looking at her quite calmly. She couldn't understand it. If she was so pissed, why wasn't she taking it out on her? Her fury couldn't have caused such calm. Unless, of course, it was the calm before the storm.
"Blair, it's not—"
"What I think?" she finished the statement, looking amused. Jenny's eyes were watering. "Oh, I think it's exactly what I think." She paused, scanning the blonde's frightened face. "You slept with him," she said knowingly, slowly, quietly. Jenny let out a shaky sigh.
"I didn't wa—"
"Are you seriously going to pretend that you didn't enjoy the experience?" Blair asked, looking amused, but Jenny would have been blind not to see the venom that laced her every word. "He's very experienced," she confided, as if the girl didn't already know, as if the whole city didn't know. Jenny swallowed hard, her eyes squeezed tight for a moment, trying to prevent any eruption of guilty tears.
"Or," she took on a different approach, "are you horrified that you lost your virginity to Chuck Bass?" her plastic smile burned Jenny. "I know I certainly was," Blair said. "When I lost it to him, I mean." Jenny swallowed hard again. "Though, I must admit I wasn't too pleased when I heard of your experience. At least though, you got to wake up in a soft, comfortable bed. You got the mature Chuck with slight misjudgment last night. I, unfortunately, only got the sticky interior of a limo and was dropped off at my house not long after the experience even ended." She daintily flipped some curls of her own off her shoulders.
Jenny was about to burst and Blair smirked at the fact that the younger blonde was about to explode right in front of her on the count of her rambles. She deserved it.
"Perhaps the next time you two—"
"S-stop! Just stop!" Jenny yelled, her eyes finally flashing back to Blair's. Blair hardly reacted to the sudden outburst. Though her lips did form an 'o' when Jenny's watering eyes pleaded with her. "It didn't mean anything," she stressed, "I just…needed someone," she finished lamely.
Blair's eyes narrowed. It seemed she was finally starting to lower part of her mask to reveal her malice over the situation. "It's your own fault that nobody else was there for you, Jenny," she said coldly. Jenny felt chilled to the bone at her words, but knew they were truer than ever and so forced herself to accept what life had bestowed upon her.
"What do you want?" she asked very quietly. There was no point in trying to defend herself or Chuck in any way. Blair must've been very hurt when she heard the news. That of course would only fuel her anger, and her…revenge. "I mean, uh…" Jenny stupidly continued, "what are you going to do to me?"
Blair smirked, almost impressed that the little girl would ask what sort of cruel punishment she would receive due to sleeping with the notorious Chuck Bass, her recent ex. She sighed, quite happy with herself. It was the only contentedness she'd felt throughout the entire experience, since halfway through her conversation with Dan that morning.
Jenny daringly looked up at her. "Blair?" she asked, feeling immediately afterwards that speaking was probably not in her best interest at that particular moment.
"I've spoken with Dan…"
Jenny parted her lips, shocked. Would Dan actually aid Blair in his own sister's destruction?
"The two of us have…arranged things that you'll most wonderfully be informed about the moment you get home." Her plastic smile was back and smile, wide and deceiving as ever, bringing a dull sparkle to her eyes. "You're leaving the city, Jenny," her smiling face dropped completely, the menace back in place. "And I'm going to make sure you stay out of the city."
Now Jenny's face dropped, panic and pale coloring filling it completely. "But, this city's all I am!" she protested, forgetting her own vow to stop talking temporarily.
Blair's cocky, evil grin turned into a hard, stone cold glare. "You should have thought of that before you slept with my ex-boyfriend."
"That's just it, Blair!" Suddenly she was defensive, and she didn't know where it came from, but she didn't question. Goodness knows when she'd feel justified again. "He was your ex-boyfriend."
"He still is!" Blair shouted, losing control of herself for a moment.
"Then why are you punishing me like I'm the skank you caught him cheating with?!"
"Because I love him!" she was almost sobbing now, and Jenny immediately felt bad. She gasped, horrified at what she'd just done. "And," she cleared her throat, resuming her calm behavior. "We were going to get back together."
"You didn't show, Blair. He was broken," Jenny's eyes narrowed in on her. She scolded herself for going down this path again. She didn't want to get on Blair's bad side anymore than she was, but the brunette didn't seem to have entirely considered every aspect of the situation. She needed to make sure she did that.
"And naturally, you decided to take on the responsibility to fix him?" Blair spat back. Jenny closed her eyes in frustration. This was getting nowhere.
"I was broken too," she ground out. Blair scoffed.
"You disgust me," she looked at her in extreme distaste. "Both of you do."
Jenny looked at her, unsure of how to really continue. She certainly didn't feel the need to justify the situation any further.
"So, you're not even going to give him another chance?" she asked, sounding a little desperate. More than anything, right at that moment she wanting things to work out for Chuck with Blair. She'd seen the anxiety in his eyes that morning at the very real possibility of losing Blair because of what they'd done. Despite the awkward conversation they'd shared, it was hard to miss.
"What goes on between me and Chuck is none of your business," she looked at her with disdain, glared, didn't want to be with her another second. Silence lingered for awhile and it became unbearable for Jenny. Blair tortured her a little while longer until she felt it was enough and she herself wanted to get the hell out of there.
"You're getting sent out of the city in a couple days, if not sooner."
Jenny's eyes flickered up to hers. The dread residing in her at that realization was evident in her eyes. The thought of leaving everybody, of leaving school, and leaving her lifestyle just flat out terrified her. She knew Serena had left for boarding school a few years back without notice, but somehow that didn't seem the same. Everybody hadn't hated her when she left. They'd been worried – mostly. Nobody would care what happened to Jenny Humphrey.
"If you ever set foot back in this city, I will destroy you."
Jenny swallowed hard. The threat had been given to her in high school many times, the threat to destroy her. Somehow this time it was different. She knew it would not just involve her social life, it would involve everything. It would prevent anything from going right in her life. She'd be the unluckiest person in the world if she ever set foot back in New York City. She was almost crying at that revelation.
"And Chuck? Aren't you going to do something to him? I didn't make this mistake on my own," she said, gathering up the remaining strength she had left in her.
Blair's eyes narrowed. "As I recall, not long ago I told you to mind your own business when it came to the matters between myself and Chuck."
Jenny nodded in shame. She had briefly forgotten that. Somehow it had not connected.
"Now," Blair said, sounding suddenly very cheerful. "I'm leaving. There's a car waiting for you just across the street. Dan is waiting for you there." She quirked an eyebrow, waiting for her reaction, but Jenny showed no new expression or agitation. "Don't follow me right away," she said. "You're not on my nice list."
Jenny made no movement and Blair left. When the soft clicking of Blair's heels had lessened significantly and she heard the cheerful sound of her greeting her limo driver down on the street, Jenny slowly made her way down the lonely steps.
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Blair was right, as predicted. Jenny was informed almost immediately on arrival that she would be leaving for boarding school in a couple days, the next day if it was possible. Rufus and Lily were very sympathetic to her having to leave the only place she'd ever called home, but Rufus was definitely more stern. She easily found the assumption that rested in his eyes: she would come back a changed, good girl – the little, innocent angel he'd known the majority of her life. Jenny knew that would not be the case though, her coming back at least. Blair was hardly wrong when it came to these things. And with Dan on her side, Jenny knew she was truly alone.
Plenty of it'll be fun's and you'll be home in no time's were spread around. Eric seemed genuinely sad to hear of her leaving. Serena and Nate were practically glaring though, and Dan barely looked at her, just like he'd barely looked at her all the way home. She felt so very alone. She should have never slept with Chuck. It had been the last straw. It was probably better that she had slept with him than with some herpes-infested hobo on the street. He had made her felt safe, even if it had had dreadful consequences.
"Knock, knock," she heard Eric calling from just outside her room.
"Come in," she sighed, completely exhausted with her life. She was sitting on her bed, one knee crossed over the other, and hardly in the mood to speak with anyone. Eric was always the exception in her life, but he was probably the one person who didn't know everything, well, besides her dad and Lily. Everything had just become so screwed up. She hated it.
"You look like you're having…fun," he noted, seeing her little accessories scattered all over the bedroom floor and an empty suitcase sitting amongst them. A heaping pile of shirts and skirts loomed over the majority of the bed. Jenny's eyes flickered up to him and she gave a small, short, sarcastic laugh to his comment. He raised his eyebrows, slightly amused, and went to sit next to her on the bed.
"There's something I don't know, isn't there?" he looked at her, concerned. She wanted the concern to be fake, so she could just kill herself. She hardly thought anyone would notice.
"Several things, I'm sure," she returned. He smirked a little, but then it faded. She wouldn't look at him.
"Jenny, we've all done regrettable things…"
She half sighed, half scoffed at his attempt at making her feel better. There was nothing he could say that would possibly make her feel like maybe she could redeem herself.
"Stop, Eric."
He frowned and she ran a hand through her hair.
"Look, I know you're just trying to help, but there is nothing you could possibly say that would make me feel better or like I could possibly get out of this…" she grappled around for the right word, "rabbit hole," she said, sighing, only remembering later that what she was in now was exactly what Chuck had warned her about. Getting involved with Damien had only been the tip of the iceberg, the lure. Eric watched her contemplatively, not saying a word.
"I'm in too deep," she said, sounding like she was on the verge of tears. "And if you knew everything that I'd done, you'd hate me too." She nodded, quite sure of herself. His eyebrows furrowed in worry and concern.
"Jenny, there's nothing—"
"Stop, Eric! Just stop!" she almost stopped breathing. It was the second time that day that she'd nearly screamed at someone to stop talking, stop trying to tell her that she was in the wrong, or maybe that she was in the right. She shook her head slowly and sighed shakily.
"Okay, maybe I can't tell you it'll be alright," he shrugged. Her eyes slowly lifted up to his.
"If you've come to insult me or tell me I'm worthless, or even to banish me to the ends of the earth, don't bother. I've already gotten my fair share of that today."
Eric was now extremely concerned. "Jenny…" he reached out for her hand, but she stole it away, tucking it under her leg. He was suddenly very afraid to leave her, afraid of what she might do. Something inside him was plunged with a dagger when he saw a distant tear travel down the side of her face, smearing her mascara a bit.
"J-just g-go," she managed, the tears seeping into her voice. His eyes were wide with what must've been consuming her. It was obvious she wasn't going to tell him. He'd recently found out about the drug dealer, and though Serena and he hadn't really talked much lately, he had been mildly aware of Jenny meddling in Serena's relationship with Nate. Something else had happened though, something recent, and maybe other things too.
But she wasn't going to tell him, at least not tonight. He didn't like that, but he accepted it. He just hoped he would tell her eventually.
"We all love you, Jenny," he said softly, though certain strength strode forth in his voice, like he needed to convince her of it. She had to restrain herself from scoffing or rolling her eyes. Such things were easy to say when you didn't know the truth. He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and then pulled her into a sweet side hug. He was relieved when she didn't push him away. She was tense because he didn't know, and he was well aware of that fact.
"And we're all going to miss you…" he said slowly, playfully. She sighed, and he didn't know what to do with it. She could think of a few people who wouldn't be so distraught to see her go.
"I don't want Nate and Serena to be there when I go," she said abruptly. His brows furrowed.
"Jenny—"
"I don't," she said, her voice demanding as she turned very directly in his arms. "Please, Eric," she softened. He looked at her, trying to find the answers to the questions she wouldn't answer. Finally he nodded.
"Alright."
She nodded once and relaxed back in his arms again. That one piece of news brought her contentment, if only a little. Of course she didn't know if Eric would be able to follow through. There was only so much a human could do. After all, Chuck hadn't been able to save his hotel without sacrificing something precious – he'd confided to her the night before.
"Thanks, Eric," she said very quietly. He didn't know what else to say, so he just held her, rocked her a little until she was almost asleep. Several times she wanted to push him away, even tell him her other secrets so he'd finally know it all and then predictably she'd lose another person close to her, someone else she couldn't bear to be without. Somehow though, she convinced herself that Eric was different, that somehow he'd understand, and that was what kept her from finally pushing him away while she still had strength left. Still, she didn't tell him. The doubt ever loomed over her.
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A/N: Hope you enjoyed. =) Wow, this was SUCH a long chapter. XD hahaha. But I really got swept up in that first scene, lololol. Please review. ;D I'll try to update again tomorrow. =)