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Fred and I walked slowly back to my common room, discussing the meeting in hushed whispers that required him to lower his head to my ear, and for me to occasionally turn my face to his which was less that a few inches away. Needless to say it was rather intimate, but we weren't particularly worried about Umbridge, but a certain other redhead was on my mind, leaving me in guilty confusion.

We stopped in front of the statue and I turned to him smiling shyly as he wrapped his arms around me. But his height often made it difficult as I stood on my tiptoes unsteadily and wavered. He smiled at my attempt, bent down and lifted me up, as I gasped, and reflexively wrapped my legs around his waist and arms around his neck with his arms underneath my bum holding me up.

"Is that easier?" he asked, his voice low and gravely sending chills up my spine.

"Uh huh." I replied, frazzled.

"Good."

He leaned in and kissed me with his usual sweetness. His kiss wasn't demanding, or passionate, it was sweet and coy. I returned the gesture and tilted my head to the side for a better angle as things maintained a PG rating. Until his arms tired some and he stepped forward, pressing my back against the wall for extra support. The coldness of the wall sent even more chills through my system, which he then took for excitement, and he attempted to deepen the kiss.

His tongue grazed my lower lip and he gently nipped it as I smiled, opening my eyes and looking into his as a sly look over came my face and I denied him. He eopened his eyes and raised an eyebrow and tried again. I sent him a challenging look, when he appeared to get an idea. He moved his hand from the outside of my thigh to my inner thigh making circles with his pointer finger, while still holding me in the air. I gasped and he took advantage and invaded my mouth with his tongue and returned his hand to where it had been. We played our game for a few minutes until we heard incoming footsteps. He gently put me down, and blushed darkly, probably as much as I was.

"Sorry, I guess I got carried away." He said sheepishly, running his hand through his hair with a quiet laugh.

"It's fine, I actually had fun." I said with a shy wink, attempting to flirt in my own semi awkward fashion.

"Well ill be sure to keep that in mind." He replied with a grin.

"I hope so." I answered, actually meaning it despite the hollow feeling I was getting in the pit of my stomach.

"I see, I guess ill see you in class tomorrow." He said slowly, smiling and giving me a quick hug goodbye before heading to his common room.

"Yeah, bye." I answered breathily, watching as he turned and walked away.

I was walking on air as I said the password and made my way up to my dorm. The only person in my dorm was Clarisse, and taking one look at my face she said, "What happened?"

"The most amazing thing occurred, and I have a teeny little problem. Could you put my hair in a braid while I tell you?" I meekly requested, twiddling my thumbs nervously.

"Of course, French braid?" she asked, eager to hear what I had to report.

"Yeah." I said, knowing the wavy texture in the morning would give me something to look forward to and distract myself.

This was how I would convey that it was going to be a somewhat serious discussion and I just needed her to listen rather than talk.

I sat at the side of the bed on the floor, and she gently combed out my hair and said, "Start from the beginning."

"Well, I was with Fred, but he left and I went to get something, and I tripped. But George was there and he caught me before I fell, he was holding me in the air, up to his chest and I could hear his heart beating. I thanked him and things got rather quiet and intense as he leaned towards me, I think he was about to kiss me. But Fred walked in, I lied, he bought it and we walked off. Then when we got to the statue we were snogging, he was holding me in the air, and soon we were frenching, and it was getting pretty heavy until we heard something and parted ways. It was intoxicating and exhilarating, but I feel guilty about George." I rambled out, feeling worse as I explained, yet simultaneously feeling like a small weight was taken off of my shoulders.

She had just finished combing my hair and was beginning to braid when she said, "Why would you feel guilty? He was attempting to move in on you, despite you being with his brother." As if this was a completely simple matter.

"But I didn't try to stop him, I just let things start to happen, and I lied to Fred." I cried, covering my face with my hands.

"Well, You did nothing wrong, you were most likely trying to spare his feelings." She replied, still completely calm.

"But what if George says something, Fred will be mad at me." I whined, face still in my hands. As though removing them and seeing was too good for me.

"I honestly doubt it. His brother was trying to snog you, not the other way around, I'm sure he'll see you as a victim of circumstance." She reasoned.

"Whatever you say." I grumbled, dropping my hands to my lap and gazing out the window at the moon, as though maybe it could offer some advice from up in the heavens.

"Uh huh. Now about the kiss, are you sure your not moving too fast?" she asked.

"I'm sure, most of the couples I've seen have frenched after the first few days, its been about a week, or a little more." I retorted slightly defensive.

"I see, well at least you've moved on from what happened with Paul."

I shuddered at the name, as memories flooded back. There was one of a second year me, pinned on the floor with Paul, a third year Ravenclaw on top of me trying to kiss me while I thrashed around. Then one of me in a corner clutching my books for dear life as Paul stood in front of me, both hands on either side of my head. He knocked away my books, grabbed my shoulders and roughly snogged me as I let him, thinking it was the best thing to do. A few more like that passed through my mind as a few tears escaped my eyes.

"Don't cry Melissa, he cant do anything now." She comforted, finishing her braid and giving me a quick hug for reassurance.

"I just keep thinking there was something I could have done." I said, regret in my voice.

I knew it was a foolish thing to say and think, but it was entirely sub coconscious. No matter how far past the situation I was, and despite my having gotten closure awhile ago, it was just a feeling I couldn't shake. I wasn't sure id ever be able to shake it. it was just something I would have to grow to accept.

"There wasn't, he was stronger than you, you were young, and he had you convinced you cared about him and that he cared about you."

"Yeah I guess." I mumbled, looking down at my hands.

In my second year Paul had been very attractive, and one day he asked me to be his girlfriend and I stupidly accepted, thinking I was the luckiest girl alive. But one day he was walking me to class, and shoved me into an abandoned classroom and tried kissing me. I kept saying no but finally he pinned me to the ground, I thought he was joking and laughed but the look in his eyes shut me up. He leaned down and kissed me roughly, I tried to turn my head but he squeezed my wrists, so hard and I cried out. He got off me and walked me to my class.

He ended up doing this sort of thing a few times, and he managed to French me since I was too scared to say no, but one day he slid a hand up my shirt, and I screamed at the top of my lungs. He dumped me that day, a few hours after that moment. Clarisse was the only one who knew what he had done, and was always there to remind me that as terrible as it was, it could have been worse.

I was brought back to the present when Clarisse put a mirror in front of me. I looked at my reflection, and decided I liked the braid. I looked over my shoulder and thanked her with a small smile. It was the best I could manage at that moment.

"I'm quite tired, I think ill retire." I said, with a fairly realistic yawn.

"Alright, ill wake you in the morning." She said, most likely not buying it but accepting that I was finished with the conversation.

"Ok, goodnight clarisse"

"Night." She called from her bed, ending our talk.

I slowly crawled under my blankets, not bothering to change and fell right asleep surprisingly. I was able to escape my past, and fall into a deep slumber with dreams of my favorite red head. I could always find my way to him in my mind, and that was a truly comforting thought. A thought that I would need to keep close.

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