Never fear! REVIEW ANSWERIN' TIME is here!

Ri2: You're becoming quite a regular, aren't you? I appreciate your support. Getting to answering, Niko didn't eat the seagulls, the seagulls crashed on his big mouth. And I stand by my claim that he has squirrel-cheeks. As for Link's decision... read up again. Who was celebrating? (Personally, I say High-lee-an, but don't say it too loud.)

?: [finds some TWW pirate art]... Well, well. I was caught red handed. Those long pointy ears are a dead giveaway, no? Maybe I could fix that plothole (and the overlooked grammar problems) and make it sound funny, too. (Then again, I don't do well forcing humor in...)

The Legend of Zelda:

Overlord of the Land

Chapter 4

Waarheid: City of Teleurstelling

"Did anybody else found it strangely convenient that we were just let in without so much as an examination?" Mako commented, looking back constantly at the gate the pirates just crossed past, where the guards told them to just pass through with no problems. Looking back, he saw the very same guards waving at them with strange looks over their faces, weirding the short man with the glasses out a lot.

"Well, it's convenient enough for us." Gonzo rebutted. "We can't really afford to seem suspicious, at least not yet. We'll take what we can get, ok?"

Tetra and her pirate crew, under pretenses of being traveling merchants looking for the best business around, had successfully infiltrated the walls of this unfamiliar city. As they walked deeper and deeper into the city, they couldn't help but feel like they were being watched at... stared at even.

"Ok, this is getting creepy." Gonzo admitted. "I know we're strangers to this place and all, but man, does it feel like they're staring down our souls."

"That's what I've been telling you about." Mako said. "something's just not right about this place. Almost as if we were not welcome."

"What could possibly make you say that?" Senza asked as they walked down a small residential district, where the people ran indoors and closed their doors and windows as soon as the pirates came close.

"Hmm... just a feeling." Mako answered.

The group eventually found its way to a small park area, where you'd normally find people having a good time, children playing around, old men sitting and giving pieces of bread to the birds... that is, were these guys not there. All the same, they took the opportunity of privacy to huddle by the park's fountain and quietly set up the plan at work.

"So, what's the plan?" Niko asked.

"Well..." Nudge thought for a short while. "We have bombs. We could just use those to storm in. We plant a bomb right in front of whoever's in charge, and no matter what he says... BOOM! New world order."

Tetra bonked Nudge with the maps she was carrying. "Don't be stupid, that's reckless." she said in admonishment. "Besides, if we blow the guy to smithereens, we'll mess up my future snazzy office, and I am not gonna clean it up." She then pulled out the maps from before, and opened a city map which she... "borrowed" from the info booth at the entrance. "What we need to do is get information. Where we are, what are the city's weak spots, any possible secret entrances, any dirt on the current reigning government or whatever they may call it... anything that we can use in our strategy. We're gonna have to split up for this. Gonzo will go with Zuko. Mako, you and Nudge will be the other group. Senza and Niko will be group number three. And Link and I will be the final group." She then handed out the city maps to each group. "We'll meet back here in about 2 hours. Don't you dare get lost, ok?"

"Hey, ma'am, will you..."

"Excuse me, sir, if I may have..."

"Can you please hear me out for... and they ignore me again."

It was frustrating for Gonzo. Nobody was cooperating with him. He really wanted to get some good information, but nobody was willing to give any. His sigh of frustration told all: a deadline he might not keep, information he might not gather... and a stoic partner who has barely moved an inch for the cause.

"You know, it would help a lot if you tried doing a better job at this." Gonzo complained at the guy he was stuck with, Zuko.

Zuko looked over at Gonzo with that stoic look that defined him, and proceeded to walk over to a lady. "Excuse me..." he said.

"Oh, you're talking to little ol' me?" The lady turned around and faced Zuko. "Oh, well aren't you the cutest little pirate I've ever seen. What can I do for you, young man?"

"...Why do I feel inadequate?" Zuko whispered, looking away for a moment.

"Excuse me, Ma'am." Gonzo interrupted before things got too embarrassing. "We're... reporters from a magazine, and we're doing a story on the town's best kept secrets."

"Magazine?" The lady questioned. "What magazine, exactly?"

"Eh..." Gonzo stuttered to try and find an answer. "Our magazine's name is... is... Great!"

"Great?" Zuko questioned.

"Yeah... the Great Magazine!" Gonzo said cheerfully, then quickly moved by Zuko. "Just work with me here, ok" he whispered. "We're new, you see, and we're looking to start off with a 'GREAT' story on this marvelous city's best kept secrets."

"Oh!" The lady exclaimed understandably "Well, you just came to the right lady to ask. You see, the land of Waarheid is a big place, and being a big place means there are bound to be a lot of secrets laying around. For example, did you know that the emperor has a dog-shaped mole on the back of his neck? It's true! I heard that people who have dog-shaped moles in the back of their necks are usually very quick on their feet. And I don't mean quick as in he could run fast, but quick as in he is very smart and can quickly come up with solutions to problems. There's a reason he's the emperor, y'know."

"Ok, ok." Gonzo said while trying to write down what he could on his piece of paper. "Continue."

"Well, as I was saying, there's a big castle on the northern side of the city and it has its back to a hill. Strangely enough, the Emperor doesn't live nor work there. His offices are in a mansion, closer to the Town Square, though they're no less fabulous. I heard the reason they don't use it is because the castle was cursed by some old wizards and anybody who lived there was doomed to a life of misfortune. But then again, who would live on a castle? They're not fashionable anymore, and they're grimy and uncomfortable and a nightmare to clean up. Besides..."

"So, why am I stuck with you again?" Nudge asked his "teammate" as they walk around town.

Mako sighed. "Look, Nudge, I don't like this any more than you do, but orders are orders." He stopped, making Nudge stop and turn around to face him. "Listen, we had a couple of bad moments before, but that was then and this is now. So what do you say?" Mako then stretched his hand, fully expecting a shake. "Let bygones be bygones?"

Nudge looked over at Mako in a rather sketchy manner. He wasn't sure he could trust him... but if he lost the trust here, it would be troublesome later.

"Bygones." Nudge said, extending his arm in a firm handshake. As they began walking again, Nudge started laughing lightly. "Heh, heh... that was a stupid argument, after all. Why did I get so angry over something so trivial like..."

"High-lee-an?" Mako suggested.

"It's HEE-LIAN! HEE-LIAN! Say it right or I'll wring you dry!!!" Nudge exploded, going off right on Mako's face, staining his glasses. Mako, instead of being scared, was actually rather amused by the sudden outburst.

"Let's just continue on what we're supposed to do, ok?" Mako said, walking off and leaving the fuming Nudge behind. He soon found a convenience store, and wondered if he could find some good info there. He entered the store, and finding no one on it, he started calling out. "Hello! Anybody home?"

"Quit yer yellin', dagnabbit! I'm coming, I'm coming!" A shrill, elderly voice echoed from the back of the store. "Young people always in a hurry... can't get anything done back here..." Then, from the back of the store emerged a small, bald, wrinkly old man walking with the aid of a cane. He was so small, Mako had to stand on tippy-toes to at least see the man's bald skull. The man inched his way to the counter and literally climbed up to his stool to greet his client. "This back is killin' me... Yeah, yeah, what're you buying? Eh?" He looked around but found no one standing by. He then looked down to notice an equally small man with glasses looking up. "Oh, there you are. So what do you want, kid?"

"I... I'm not here to buy anything, I just want some info on this..."

"I ain't gonna tell you nothing if you don't buy from me." The old man declared.

Mako groaned. This wasn't going as he planned. "So... how much for the Deku nuts?"

"Deku nuts are 10 rupees apiece." The old man said. They're nutritious AND practical if you're ever in battle and need to blind your opponent."

Mako pulled out two blue rupees and set them on the counter. "A Deku nut, please, with some information about this city."

The old man was quick to oblige to his paying costumer. "Here's the nut. Now, this here's the city of Waarheid."

"Yes, and?" Mako asked for more information.

"Deku nuts, 10 rupees." The old man flatly said.

"Wha... Wait a minute!" Mako blurted out. "That's a ripoff!"

"That's commerce, sonny." The old man rebutted. "You'd think you were gonna get a lot for 10 rupees? Dream on."

"Grrrrr..." Mako growled... but pulled out 10 more rupees and bought another Deku nut and another tidbit of information.

"This place is home of the best horseback archery team in land or sea, the Leugenhars..."

"What are you doing." Nudge interrupted when he found Mako inside the convenience store.

"I'm just finding out some good information about this city... what was it called again?" Mako said, turning to the old man to ask him again.

"Waarheid."

"Waarheid." Mako confirmed. Nudge saw this an walked closed to the counter, curious about what information there could be. "If you please, my good man, continue." Mako said.

"Deku nuts, 10 rupees." The old man flatly said.

"Gah!" Mako goraned in frustration. This was gonna be a long day.

"Oh, so that's how it is." Nudge said, a stern look growing in his face. "You take advantage of poor tourists like us who just want to know more about this city and try to bleed us out of our money. You should be ashamed of yourself. You're an old man, you're supposed to be wise and friendly and stuff, not greedy and opportunistic. You will not get another rupee from me or my friend for as long as we're here. Good day, sir!" And with those words, Nudge nudged Mako to leave the store.

"I can tell you some good dirt on the emperor..." The old man said very suggestively.

Those words were enough to stop the duo cold at the doorstep. They skeptically looked back at the old man at the counter, who had a sly look written all over his face. They looked at each other, then looked back into the store. They couldn't help it... curiosity had taken them over.

"This better be some good info." Nudge warned as he and Mako walked back in. "Ok, old timer, speak."

"Deku nuts, 10 rupees." The old man flatly said.

Nudge groaned loudly, throwing his hands in the air in frustration. The old man was going on with his greedy charade. He felt like this was about enough, and he could barely handle anything anymore. But still... the info.

"Thank you." The old man said as he received his payment. He handed a Deku nut and began speaking. "Now, this emperor of ours..."

"(singing) Follow the yellow brick road! Follow the yellow brick road!

Follow, Follow, Follow, Follow, Follow the yellow brick road."

Senza found no other way to rub his head in attempt to find patience to stand Niko's incessant singing. Sadly, it was not working, and his patience was running dangerously low.

"(singing) Follow the yellow-brick, follow the yellow-brick, Follow the yellow-brick road! "

Senza could not stand it any longer, and was resorting to extreme measures, like ramming rupees in his ears to try and muffle the shrill screams that Niko tries to pass off as singing.

"(singing) Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee're off to see the wizard! The magical wizard of..."

"STOP! SINGING!!" Senza yelled out at the top of his lungs. "That is the LAST time we stop to see any outdoor plays like that!"

"What?" Niko defended himself, clutching his pamphlet of the show they just spent 10 minutes watching. "Don't you like futuristic musicals? I personally liked the music. It was so catchy."

"I noticed..." Senza seethed, teeth clenched to avoid screaming again.

"Gee, Senza, you look kinda stressed." Niko pointed out, oblivious of the reason why Senza was so tense in the first place. "You should probably lay down, find a way to unwind, drink something smooth and don't let anything bother y... Hey, look! A harbor!" He yelled out, pointing out his discovery.

Senza... was grateful. If he had payed no notice to Niko's last words, his fist might have found his way to his partner's nose. The discovery of such a large hallmark, however, was no small thing, and Senza knew this lone moment earned them their pay. A harbor, a place where they could easily disembark and bring supplies to the ship, was very valuable for them. The duo walked down to the harbor to speak to some of the people there.

"Ahoy, sailor!" Senza shouted to a gruff man lugging a barrel around. "Who's in charge of this harbor?"

The gruff sailor set the barrel down and gave an unmistakably dirty look at Senza. "Why do ye want t' know?" he asked.

"We only need to bring a ship to port, but we were unaware that this existed." Senza explained.

The man looked at him very intensely, which was making Senza very uncomfortable. The man spat a large, green loogie (Editorial: The who what, again?) right by Senza, then pointed to a small building due south. "Down the hall, up the stairs, and to the left. Just follow the signs."

"Right... thanks." Senza said. He pulled Niko and went straight to the building. The office was very odd. The general scent was rather foul. Now, sailors aren't exactly the cleanest of people, but this odor was an obtuse exaggeration in the nasty department. Also, the paint job was positively... lively, to say the least. The pastels look like they were at war with the neons, the blues with the reds, the purples with the browns, the neat with the unkempt. And the decor... plants with a dozen knives skewering them, broken chandeliers, and a frame of a boat in a calm sea with a shark swimming just below... what was going on in here?

"What kind of stark raving mad man would do these abominations to his cabin?" Niko wondered. "It's almost as if the 'man' handling things here was a..."

"Well, HELLO there!" a creepy voice came from outside, sending horribly cold chills down Niko and Senza's vertebrae. They hesitantly turned around to see a tall, lanky man, bald on the top, but sporting a hearty beard, and wearing a turquoise striped shirt and blue short.

"I am called the Guru, and I run this harbor in the name of the Emperor." Guru introduced himself with the biggest grin he could muster. He walked over to his chair, whistling all the way.

"S... Senza... I'm scared." Niko whispered to his partner.

"Well, tough it out." Senza answered. "We need to do this, and we need to do it now." He then turned to Guru and spoke. "So, Mr. Guro... eh... Guru! Let's say that I, hypothetically, own a ship and I need to drop dead... ANCHOR! Here... drop anchor here. Is there anything I should know?"

"It's actually quite simple, you only need to be prepared to pay a small fee when you come in, no questions asked." Guru answered.

"Is that all?"

"That's all!" Guru said. "Unless you want to know about our extended personal plan..."

"NO!" Senza and Niko yelled in unison, their uneasiness catching up with them.

"Well, thanks for that. We'll just leave the same way we came in. Which is this." Senza hurried and pushed Niko to the exit.

"WAIT!" Guru prompted the guys to halt the pirates' progress with a yell. "I want you to be honest with me, though."

"He's on to us!" Niko whispered to Senza, unable to control his fear. "He'll turn us over to the authorities and we'll be hung for sure."

"Well, if you weren't shaking so much..." Senza reprimanded the young pirate.

"We should just make a run for it. Now." Niko suggested.

"... Tempting... but we can just resolve this somehow." Senza then turned over to Guru, feigning control and happiness. "What is it?"

"Tell me the truth..." Guru started. Then... he simply sat there, staring at the two men in front of them for what seemed like an eternity, which didn't help Niko's condition. Then, suddenly... "What do you think of the decoration?"

"Eh?" Niko was confused.

"The decoration!" Guru said more forcefully. "I did this all by myself! I personally think it's a masterpiece... but don't take my word for it. Please, take a moment to let it sink in and envelop your senses into it. Now please tell me what you think about it."

"Uh... Well... It's... it certainly left an impression on me." Senza said, trying to find the best words he could muster.

"It really does?" Guru said, noticeably excited. "I wanted to try and give people such an impression. I call it... impressionist!"

"Well, thanks for the impression. I was really impressed. I could not be more impressed if were pressed against the wall... bound and gagged... at knifepOW!"

"Shut it, Niko." Senza kicked his partner to make him shut up, then hurried him out the door. "See you soon!" He said to Guru. "Not too soon, I hope." he whispered.

"Why do I always have that sort of impression with people?" Guru asked to himself. "Could it be the office?" He looked around the horrid design he had given the office, which one could only guess happened during a bad day on a bad moment with a bad set of mind. "Hmm... Nah! Couldn't be."

"Now..." Tetra began. "I don't want you getting the wrong idea. You're my partner because I'm contractually obliged to lug you around." Calm as they come, Link simply looked at Tetra, sporting a sly smile. "What are you smirking about?" Tetra snarled, to which Link turned his gaze forward and shook his hands in front of him to shrug the case off.

"You know, you oughta know your place in my crew by know." Tetra muttered.

"Which is...?"

Tetra stared down at Link. "Did you just talk back at me?" She asked with a none-too-happy face. Link had a confused face and limited himself to shake his head in negation. Tetra's piercing gaze didn't drop, but the green garbed boy kept claiming his innocence. She looked around to see if anybody else what close, but there was no one close enough. "Maybe it was my imagination. But just so you know, I don't take disrespect so lightly."

"That's harsh."

Tetra stopped. Link noticed this a few steps further, then turned around to see what was wrong with the young captain. "That wasn't my mind. I'm sure I heard someone speak." She reached for her sabre, and began looking around the desolate alley for any signs of life. "Who's there? Show yourself!" She commanded.

Suddenly, someone sprung from the bushes right behind her. "I come in peAUGH!" the man couldn't say anymore as Tetra turned around blindly and slashed him in the gut area. Link jumped in shock upon witnessing the event. Thankfully, he was just out of Tetra's swing radius.

"... OW! That really stung!" The man yelled as he reincorporated from the floor. He noticed the obviously tense Tetra and decided to ease her up a bit... by raising his shirt. "Thank goodness I wear my skin-tight armor all the time. It's a bit hot and heavy, but its really helpful in times like this."

"Who are you?" Tetra questioned the man as she sheathed her sabre.

"Me? My name is Miyahon, and I am an artist!" The man introduced himself with an exaggerated bow. This middle-aged man with grayish clothes and thick mane sat down in the floor whit his legs crossed, pulled out a pen and paper from his pants and proceeded to look intensively at the pair in front of him. "And you guys are PERFECT!"

Link and Tetra couldn't help but look at the man weirdly. "Perfect? For what?" Tetra asked, noticing he started to scribble on his piece of paper. "And... what are you doing with that paper?"

"Stay still!" Miyahon ordered, stopping Tetra cold. "You have sprung my inspiration! Why, I feel just about ready to make an adventure based on you two alone!" He pounded on that paper furiously as he drew up a rough sketch of Link and Tetra. "The possibilities are flooding my mind! Why, I could make a rough 'n tough pirate story... Or an epic adventure with the kid in green here as the hero and you as his sidekick... Or even better, you'd be the damsel in distress... even a probable love interest!"

"Wait, what!?" Tetra yelled out. "What exactly do you think you are?" He grabbed Link by the arm and began tugging him away. "We're wasting time. We need to find out what we can about this place, and we're standing around like idiots."

"Wait a minute. I almost forgot." Miyahon said. "There was a reason I originally approached you." Miyahon stood up, dusted off his clothes, and approached the duo so very uncomfortably close. "I heard you guys are looking for dirt on the emperor. Is that right?" Link and Tetra looked at each other with matching disturbed looks in their faces, then hesitantly turned back at Miyahon and nodded in confirmation. "Good, because I happen to be part of an underground rebellion who's looking to overthrow the current empire. You might have heard nothing but good tidings for the emperor from the townsfolk, but it's only because it's law! You dare speak ill of the empire, the least you'll get is 30 years."

"Whoa. That's harsh." Tetra commented. She thought about it for a short while before opening her mouth again. "Wait. That's good!"

"Good?" Miyahon said, joining Link in looking Tetra weirdly. "That's awful. And that's only one of the things we've been able to gather from them. Just imagine what we don't..."

"I said that it's good, and it's good." Tetra reaffirmed her stance. "If we can get this info out, we can create a revolt big enough the big guns cannot..."

"It won't work." Miyahon butts in, talking somewhat solemnly, but seemingly incapable of moving erratically about. "Already tried that. Three years ago. We didn't get enough support and we lost a lot there. And that was the last of the attempts in recent memory." Miyahon pulled out a newspaper out of his pants and gave it to a squeamish Tetra. The headline read 'Botched insurgence finishes in massive arrests and casualties'. "Since then, we've figured the best way to get this oppressor down from the throne is to do it from the inside. But we cannot infiltrate no matter what."

Link and Tetra paced about trying to take all this in. This was a break for them... and at the same time, it was a very inopportune set of news. If they ever wanted to continue with their quest, they needed to come up with a new approach to the situation. Then, an idea hit Link. He swiped a piece of paper from Miyahon's pants, and began drawing up some plans. Tetra and Miyahon looked carefully as Link kept giving form to his idea. Finished, he presented the idea to Tetra.

"Of course." Tetra nodded upon seeing the plans. "If one of your guys cannot infiltrate, then why not someone from outside? One who's face isn't known... like Link and myself."

Miyahon opened his mouth to protest, but thought a bit more, and couldn't find much to fault about it. "That may actually work." He then pulled a set of papers from his pants and gave them to a very squeamish Tetra. "This is all the info we've gathered. It'll do you good, even if we haven't figured out some key points."

"I'm afraid to ask... but how do you keep all this stuff in your pants?"

"Eh..." Miyahon stuttered an answer. "... Hammerspace?"

"Eh... It's okay. I'd rather not know." Tetra said, giving the papers to Link for safekeeping. "Well, I think we're good to go. Let's go meet up the guys. I'm sure they got some good information. I just hope they're not caught up in anything and turn up late."

... 2 hours later...

"... Because Terry was always thinking more about himself than about his father's business, and when they came to rob the place, he was supposed to be on duty, but he was out with his friends drinking and whatnot, and they turned the place upside down and ran away with a lot of loot. Needless to say, Grant kicked his own good-for-nothing son out on the street. And that leads to a juicy scandal that happened with a local opera singer that lived right in front of Grant's house. Oh, she's a lovely singer, mind you, but there were always rumors of shady practices to keep herself slim and pretty. Anything from eating strange things -if at all- to shady medical practices to witchcraft, you name it, everybody thought she did it. Also..."

Gonzo and Zuko were nodding on the verge of sleep, hearing this once-sweet lady rant nonstop about random trivia from the city. Strangely enough, the only thing keeping them awake was the lady's screeching voice yapping constantly, seemingly without ever taking a breath.

"Ma'am, I think..." Zuko tried to intervene.

"Wait, I'm just getting to the best part, sonny." The lady said.

"Sonny? I'm not a kid..."

"Now where was I?" The lady continued. "Oh, yes. That opera singer. Did you know it was a dream of mine to sing in the opera? But as it turns out, I never properly developed the voice for it... or the lungs... or the physique... or pretty much any sort of refined features. So, I had resigned myself to singing in the bath. I swear, they make those baths to have the meanest of acoustics. I wanna know who designed the baths like that... though I don't know what I would say to him... or her, if it was a woman. You know, it would be funny if it was a woman who designed the bathrooms, beacause..."

"ENOUGH!!!" Gonzo yelled out, being considerably annoyed by the woman's incessant yapping. "I... I think we got enough info."

"Are you sure?" the lady asked. "I can always tell you about..."

"YES!" Gonzo yelled in reaction. "I think we'll manage. Thank you for your contribution." He looked up to the sun and noticed ho far it had moved since they started. "Holy smokes, we're late. Come on, Zuko, we don't wanna make the boss mad." And with that, Gonzo and Zuko rushed out of the zone.

"Bye now!" The lady shouted. "I can hardly wait for your next issue! I'm sure it'll be a mega hit!"

Back at the park, Tetra and the others started gathering around the fountain to discuss their progress. But first...

"Where's Nudge and Mako?" Tetra asked.

"I'm sorry, Miss Tetra." Nudge apologized... from behind the stack of Deku nuts. "This stuff is surprisingly had to carry."

Upon seeing what Mako and Nudge were carrying, she immediately went into angry mode. "What... is that you're carrying?" she asked.

"Oh these?" Mako said. "Well, this old man gave us an offer we couldn't refuse, and we got some good information, too."

"It took a while, but we got what we wanted." Nudge added.

That comment stood out as odd for Tetra. "How many nuts did you buy, exactly?" she asked.

"Eh... let's see..." Mako thought, trying to do the math in his mind. "It was around... eh.. around... three hundred... fifty... seven?" He finished, hesitantly.

Tetra facepalmed. "Well... at least you guys know what you'll be eating for the next weeks. Enjoy your Deku nut diet."

Afterwards, the guys reviewed what they had learned through their different sources. After a good, long discussion weeding out the good from the misleading, the team had something to work with.

"Ok, this is what we'll do." Tetra began explaining. "I need you six to go back to the ship, then dock it at the harbor. Afterwards, scout these so-called "rat holes" we've been told about and how would they help us. Stock up on supplies as always, and keep the ship ready. Meanwhile, Link and I will attempt to infiltrate the emperor's headquarters and tell him how things are going to be run from now on. Wish us luck."

And with those words, the group separated. The six pirates, led by Gonzo, walked out of Waarheid's walls and headed to where they had left the ship. Tetra and Link, on the other hand, marched all the way to the grand mansion that served as the emperor's working quarters, bent on making an unforgettable impression on the emperor, even if they had to bring down everything, kitchen sink included! Nothing was just about to slow her down!

"Do you have an appointment?" The receptionist asked in a very monotonous voice.

"Eh... No, we don't have an appointment, but it's important that we see him today." Tetra tried to explain.

The main receptionist in the emperor's office looked at Tetra with those very monotonous eyes that she couldn't clearly read, and opened her wrinkly old mouth. "I'll see if I can squeeze you in. Please take a seat, Ms. Toffins."

Tetra and Link turned to some chairs and sat next to each other. In front of them was a stack of old magazines. They tried as hard and mighty as they could, but the allure of the magazines was too much to handle, so they each ended up grabbing a magazine and skimming over it.

"Hmm... interesting." Tetra muttered while reading the magazine. "101 ways to prevent pirate attacks? I heard of this before..."

...

"Oh, ho ho ho ho... Link, you've got to see this one. 'Are you surrounded by idiots? Take this quiz'. Classic."

...

"Well, you can tell a horoscope is outdated when it's totally wrong even for the day it's supposed to run."

...

"So... do you think the guys have made it to the ship already?" Tetra took her eyes off the magazine and looked at Link to ask. Link took a look at the window, and seeing how the sun had barely moved since they entered, he shook his head. "You're probably right. We did land a bit far off." Tetra let the subject drop for a moment, inciting the awkward silence to creep in. "I trust they will pull through, though." She added. "That's why I chose them, despite their flaws. I trust them... But don't you go around saying that to them."

...

"Link..." Tetra said, keeping her gaze forward without really wanting to look at the guy. "I have to be honest with you. I've been having... thoughts. Weird thoughts." Link looked at her curiously, then began to make hand gestures suggesting her thoughts may have something to do with her "encounter" not too long ago. "No, no, Link. It's not about the Goddesses. I'm way past that. No, these thoughts inevitably pivot around a singular part in my life..." Tetra looked down to the floor. She really didn't know how to continue, and somehow, she didn't really know how she even began to talk about this to begin with. Very shyly, she looked at Link through the very corner of her eye, only to meet head-on with his own eyes, forcing her to bite her cheeks from the inside to avoid any involuntary movements.

"Ms. Toffins, the Emperor can see you now." The receptionist interrupted in the nick on time, with her usual monotone voice. Tetra let out a sigh that felt equal parts frustration and relief. "You have five minutes. Don't waste them."

"Welcome to Waarheid. I'm Dante, the Emperor, ruler, CEO, governor, highest ranking officer in the armed forces and general manager of the place." The emperor introduced himself to the pair sitting in front of him. He was a tall, imposing man dressed in dark military clothing with a rough, hard to read face and long, greatly unkempt hair "What can I do for you?"

"Well, there's something I..." Tetra began, only to be interrupted by some sort of timer being set by Dante. "What is that?"

"I'm on a schedule here. Hurry, or I'll have to kick you out." Dante explained in a very stuffy manner, earning the angry looks from Link and Tetra.

"Then I'll be brief." Tetra said, pulling out her documents. "I have reason to believe you're not running this country as you should. Extortion, under-the-table deals, civil oppression, unjust incarceration and torture, general stepping over of the people, puppy kicking, kitty littering, etcetera, etcetera. And that's only the stuff we've managed to dig up." She then spread the paperwork dramatically across the table, in full view of the Emperor. "Your reign of terror ends here. I'm here to replace you, and you don't have any soldiers nearby to help you, either. So, you wanna do this the easy way, or the hard way?"

Tetra waited a while. She wanted to allow it all to sink in to the Emperor, and be capable to relish in his reaction. However, something was wrong. Instead of the symptoms she was waiting for -sweaty palms, bated breath, shifty eyes- she could hear some stifled laughter. Tetra looked up to the Emperor who was going over some of the stuff in his desk, shaking his head in disbelief and trying hard to not laugh. The tall, imposing man could hardly believe he was being threatened by a couple of children to step down from his position.

"Let me get this straight." Dante spoke, stroking his perfectly trimmed goatee and looking like it was giving the subject some deep thought. "You're telling me to skip town and never come back just so you can take over."

"Yup."

"And... You have all this mountain of evidence to support your claim. Is this correct?"

"A-yup."

"And... I'm just guessing here... did you get all this from that nutcase Miyahon, right?"

"That's r... what?"Tetra quickly reacted to the Emperor's remarks. "Nutcase?"

"Do you seriously believe what a random lunatic in the street tells you? You look smarter than that." Dante responded. "Have you talked to other people in town? Everybody loves me. Everybody loves what I do. My approval ratings are through the roof. You could go out right now and promise everybody the moon and the stars and they wouldn't bat an eye in your direction."

"Kind of the reason I came here first..." Tetra muttered.

"So even if you do manage to force me to sign a surrender treaty, the people would not accept you." Dante said with a rather dark undertone on his voice. "So begone. All of you. You and your friends have no place in my Waarheid. Go now, before I decide to act upon your insubordination!"

Tetra could barely believe it not even 5 minutes into the insurgence proper and she's already losing. She was put on the defensive, and if she didn't act quick, then it could all be over. She then thought to play the card she had been saving for a good occasion. "Do you know who I am?" Upon hearing this, Link was surprised. Will she really...?

"Do I know who you are?" Dante repeated mockingly. "No, and frankly, I don't care. All I care about is that you get off my face and out of my town."

Tetra's eyes began to ignite as she stood in the very chair she was sitting on. "I think you should know." Tetra snarled, while Link stood in anticipation to every word his partner would speak.

"I... am... Tetra."

Link facepalmed.

"I am the leader of the roughest, most infamous band of pirates to ever cross the Great Sea. And I am not one to let up on a bounty, treasure, or quest so easily. Do not think I am about to give up, even if I have to kick you out myself."

*DING!*

"Oh, my, look at the time." Dante spouted upon the opportune timer running its course. "It's been a nice an energetic chat, but I have an actually important person to meet, and you have a little fantasy to deflate from your head. Goodbye now, and don't fall when walking down the stairs. No, seriously, it feels they waxed it with oil and you could fall down the stairs at any moment."

Tetra shot an intense glare straight to Dante's face, but deep down she knew she wasn't going to accomplish much here. Resignated, she patted Link and motioned him to follow her out the door.

"Damn that Miyahon." Dante muttered. "He's becoming a bigger problem than before. I may need to silence him for good this time."

"Wait... what?" Tetra said just as she reached the door. "Why would you want to silence that man? If he's a nutcase, then he's not a real threat... unless..." Her angered face slowly transformed to a more sly and gleeful one as she decidedly marched back to the Emperor's desk. "Unless he really IS right. You ARE doing all those horrible things, and you know he knows. So before he uncovers more stuff, you want to do him away." Having stood back in the chair, she crossed her hands triumphantly and continued. "Link, write that down. We'll consider that the Emperor's confession."

For the first time in the whole conversation, the Emperor began looking uneasy. His slip-up was not exactly a minor one, after all. "All right. I was careless." He admitted. "But... if there's one thing I've learned in my years as ruler, is to always have a backup plan. GUARDS!"

Suddenly, the side walls of the room flipped over, revealing three soldiers on each wall, brandishing their swords. Tetra and Link jumped right to the center of the room in reaction and unsheathed their blades. "Link, back-to-back tactic, now!"

The guards quickly circled around Link and Tetra, effectively trapping them. "Don't let these traitors live." Dante ordered.

The first soldier threw the first swipe directly at Link, to which he blocked with his shield. He then swung his sword, which clanged on the guard's armor, but didn't do much damage. Tetra, on her side, was sword-locked with another soldier, trying to push him out of her face. The soldier was noticeably stronger, and his sword was inching closer to Tetra. Suddenly, Tetra pulled out a hammer from her item bag and threw a blow straight on the guard's helm, knocking him out cold.

Two soldiers signaled to each other to take advantage of the weak spot between the pair's backs. They thrusted their swords right on the sweet spot... only to be met by the quick reflexes of the Link and Tetra team, who jumped in tandem right on top of the swords. The weight of their opponents proved too much for the guards, who fell to the floor by stubbornly holding on to their blades, provoking their hands to break due to the force of impact and the weight of their opponents. Afterwards, Link and Tetra kicked their helms out of the way to finally defeat them.

Two to three. Now things were a bit more balanced for Link and Tetra. The three soldiers decide to charge at the same time, to which Link responded by taking out his Deku Leaf and he blew the lot out to the wall. Tetra followed by using her grappling hook and relieving the soldiers from their helms and front armor. When the guards reacted again, they were facing the business end of Tetra's sabre.

"You have a choice right now. Leave, or perish now." Tetra said. The soldiers needed no second warning, as they immediately ran away from the office carrying their knocked out comrades with them.

"Let me guess..." Tetra taunted the Emperor, who was wiping his sweat with a cloth at the moment. "You were careless... again."

"Heh... you're good, pirate. I'll give you that." Dante said among heavy breathing. "But now you still have to deal with me. And believe me, I didn't become emperor by coincidence."

"If you wanna die so much..." Tetra said. She then looked at Link. "Leave him to me. He'll be easy." She prepared her sabre, then ran straight to the Emperor. She jumped to the chair, which served as a stepping stone to get to the desk, she swung as hard as she could, and... a shocking surge of energy reverberated through Tetra's body, paralyzing her efforts and throwing her back to the floor. Link immediately ran to her side to assess her damage. "Didn't see that coming... *COUGH!*" Tetra reacted to Link's concern, amidst coughing up smoke clouds.

Dante, making a full recovery from his distraught self just a few moments ago, walked away from his desk and approached the two youngsters on the floor. "It seems you overestimated your powers, dear pirate. Taking me down will prove difficult, should you choose to continue pursuing this hopeless daydream. There's not a single creature in this world who can oppose me. You would need a power stronger than mine to try and take me on, and you'd be hard-pressed to find such power."

"Shoot, he's got a magical shield around him." Tetra explained. "We can't get him like this. We need to regroup and come up with a plan."

"Regroup, you say?" Dante taunted. "Not likely. You see, I know everything that goes on in here. I know you sent your subordinates back to your ship. And I know that when they get there, they'll find a little surprise courtesy of me. And I know that you won't be able to regroup anymore, since you're all that's left. And when I'm done with you, I'll have that insane activist's head."

However, just as he finished speaking, a tremendously loud noise came from outside. Dante looked over at the window behind his desk, and upon seeing what it was, he threw himself to the ground and braced for impact. Suddenly, the whole wall behind the Emperor's desk was blown off, causing debris to fly everywhere and forcing Link and Tetra to share Link's shield as a makeshift refuge. When everything cleared, they looked out of the "redecorated" window, and on the harbor in the distance was their pirate ship waiting, with cannons drawn and ready to fire.

...Some time before...

"Hurry, guys. If we follow this shortcut, we'll be at our ship in no time!" Mako leaded the group trying to get to the ship as fast as possible, which is why they were in a low claustrophobic tunnel they discovered to try and go under the massive hills and reach their destination. "Look, there's the exit. We're almost out." He said, pointing at a faint, distant light.

Everybody was clearly glad to get out of the tunnel, and they were double glad because they could see the familiar beach and their ship on the distance. Then, they started hearing some noises in the direction of the ship: noises like screaming and barking and some trees falling. Instead of worried, the pirates walked on, curious of what could possibly happen by their ship.

When they reach the ship, they notice a bunch of Waarheid soldiers overtaken by fear, who have been trying their best to commandeer the pirate ship but were stopped by a couple of strange black animals with huge mouths and razor-sharp teeth and no legs but impressive jumping skills. The soldiers would have been mincemeat already if it weren't for the fact that these animals were being bound by strong chains. The pirates could not help but laugh as they witnessed a brave soldier's attempt to crush the animals with a fallen palm tree, only to be left with a few splinters of the tree left.

"Well, well, well." Gonzo began. "So this is the mighty army of Waarheid. Can't even take care of a tiny pest problem, right?" After asking that question, the whole pirate crew burst out in laughter.

Niko then moved to one of the vicious animals, and upon seeing him approach, the animal turned tame and friendly. "Who's my cute little chompy? You are! Oh, yes, you are! Did ya miss me? Were these bad men bothering you?"

"Wait... are those things... yours?" One of the soldiers asked.

"Yes. They're chomps." Mako answered as he walked over to another one of those animals. "Very violent if you don't know how to treat them. They make the perfect guard."

So... uh... What are you going to do with them?" Another soldier asked.

"Oh, nothing." Senza said as he and the other pirates moved to the remaining chomps. "We pet them, we give them some food, we let them hop around, that kind of stuff."

"Oh... wait... hop around?"

The soldier's frightened comment came just in time to see the pirates remove the chains on the chomps. "Sic 'em!" Niko ordered the vicious animals, who immediately hopped towards the soldiers, forcing them to run right into the thick forest by the beach to escape and ensuing much laughter from the pirates.

"I'll never get tired of those chomps." Niko said before joining the others in pushing the ship back to water to sail it to the harbor as planned.

"Boy, are those guys reckless." Tetra commented, turning to Link. "Remind me to thank them."

Then, before Dante could react, Tetra and Link jumped off the hole in the wall and glided out to safety using Link's Deku Leaf. They hit the ground running, intent on making it to the harbor before they could get caught. Dante, in his part, got up from the warzone that was once his office, and took a good look at the hole the pirate ship had made. "Well... I guess having a harbor view was not the smartest of ideas." That's when he noticed that the two troublemakers had escaped and were probably going to join the rest of their gang over at the docks. "Ms. Receptionist?" He called, rather calmly at that.

"Yes, Mr. Dante?" The receptionist entered the broken office, talking in her monotone voice.

"Call the general, tell him to mobilize all forces to the pirate ship in the harbor. Do not let them escape."

"Will do, sir."

"Oh... and call Doris. Tell her to set up the spare room as my new office."

"Right away, sir."

"You won't get away, pirate." He scowled grimly, looking at the overblown scenery in front of him.

Meanwhile, Link and Tetra did their best to run, run as fast as they could. The faint sound of sped up clanging in the distance confirmed what they knew: they were being chased by the emperor's soldiers, so they did every trick they could come up with to throw the soldiers off their scent. In the heat of the chase, however, the adrenaline took over and the trill of the chase seemed more important than a sense of direction, tiredness, stealth... or shyness, or doubt, or insecurity. For the briefest of moments, they felt so sure of themselves. They may have everything against them now, but they have been in these shoes before and they've pulled through all the same, and this would be no different. They would not be caught. They would be free; forever free to do as they pleased, to roam the seas and cast away any who would dare slow them down. They would ride the sunset, and thrive to reach the place where the waters meet the sky, and steal a slice of heaven to delight themselves in the unparalleled taste. And they would do it... together... as one.

...If only Gonzo wasn't right there in front of them.

*THUD*

*CRASH*

*KERPOW*

"Did... someone saw the horse that ran me over?" Gonzo said woozily.

Tetra looked around, not exactly sure where she was. When she assessed the situation, she noticed they were somewhere within a string of trees, with a clear view of the harbor not too far from here. "Well, I guess the plan worked, considering we ran into a few bumps here and there and we had to improvise..."

"So you did it?" Gonzo asked. "When do we move in?"

"What?" Tetra questioned, still a bit dazed. When she made sense of Gonzo's expression, she quickly stretched her hands out to stop his thought process. "No, not that. The plan backfired, he was into us from the beginning and we need to skedaddle before we're skewered like a pincushion and tortured to no end. Now start thinking up a new plan." She said calmly.

"Then... what worked?"

"That." Tetra pointed to the inner part of town, where the soldiers were running amok with no sense of direction, often bumping with each other and running in circles without any real rhyme or reason besides claiming that they saw the fugitives walk that way. "Eh... remind me to fire them when I rise to power." she commented as she analyzed the scene.

Gonzo nudged his boss in a hurrying manner to snap her back on the matter at hand. " Miss Tetra, we really need to go. They're not gonna run in circles forever!"

"Wanna bet?" Tetra smirked.

"Come on, captain, this is serious!" Gonzo stressed the urgency of their retreat, to which Tetra complied and headed straight to the ship, where the rest of the crew was just about ready to set sail. Not a second later that they were on board, a platoon of soldiers came charging through the harbor, disrupting the peace of the workers and stomping on anything that was in between them and the pirate ship.

"Halt! Cease and desist!" the sergeant shouted at the pirate ship while trying to reach them.

"I'm sorry! We can't attend you right now! We're kinda busy, you see." Nudge answered from the port side. "Please leave a message and we'll contact you as soon as possible."

"You!" the sergeant pointed at Guru, who was just walking around some boats with a large black bag. "The creepy man who runs this place. Make this ship stay in harbor."

"No can do, Mr. Soldier." Guru said. "Their parking time is almost up. They were extremely cheap in that, and the sooner they leave, the better."

Thus, as quickly as they came in, they left Waarheid in favor of the seas, much to the chagrin of the soldiers who were just a step behind, shaking their fists furiously at them.

"So they managed to escape." Dante confirmed his suspicions with the sergeant in charge of the previous chase. "They managed to escape... on your charge?"

"Well... you see sir..." the sergeant stuttered and squirmed trying to relay the information to his leader. "We had... problems, sir. Most of the soldiers under me got lost... and we lacked the resources to... uh... to get them... and, uh... they didn't heed my warnings, and... we couldn't stop the intruders... and..."

"Such a shame to hear that." Dante said. "Do you know what this means to you, right?"

"I... Get demoted?" the sergeant shyly said, finishing up with the widest of smiles.

Dante laughed at the poor sergeant's try, but shook his head left and right in reaction. "No, no. You're only going to join me... in the basement."

The sergeant's gulp could be heard all through the emperor's place. He had heard the rumors of what happened in the bowels of the country of Waarheid, and now he was going to see if those rumors were indeed true. Whatever was down there, he already didn't like it. As both of them walked away from the office, the sergeant looked at the receptionist with puppy-dog eyes as he mouthed what could be his final expressions to a living human.

"Help me."

**To Be Continued**

...

...

(... I'm not dutch, BTW)