PRELUDE; THE BEGINNING OF EVERYTHING
I gripped my chest, the pain was utterly blinding but I knew what I had to do. I want to move but the amount of blood I have lost in the process of this final climax, spoke other words to me. I can hear the plated boots falling evenly behind me. "Elissa, you do not need to do this." Loghain's voice cut above the clash of swords around us. "Let me redeem myself, my own actions." He kneels down at my side, my gaze lifts from the fallen foe before me but it does not move. It was waiting, watching us. Knowing what the next step in this attack called for. "You have shown me what true honor is and where it comes from. You have shown me the error in my ways and now I see the only path that is fit for me to travel upon. I will make this final blow but know that I do not do it for Ferelden, I do it for the future you carry within you." I cough, the blood dripping from my lips as I topple over upon my elbows. A hand, his hand, touches the middle of my back and I know what he was asking of me. "Take it..." I mutter just loud enough for him to hear. "I will honor your wish, Loghain and I will always be honored to call you my brother." I look up, the tears stinging my eyes but I see a smile creep across his lips. "It has been an honor to call you, sister."
It was with that simple gesture the Fifth Blight was ended, when Loghain cut down the demon before us.
The light was so blinding that I took this chance to escape. I picked myself up and stumbled back to the steps. I hobble down each one, grimacing in pain from the broken ribs I carried. Alas, I find myself at the base of the Fort. My eyes skimming over the men from Redcliffe who held this position while I fought the battle upon the tower. But it was the one figure, in particular that stood out the most among them all: Bann Teagan Guerrin.
I have never felt such relief as to when I collapsed at his feet. My hands holding my ribs, knowing I had worse wounds scattered along my body. "Elissa?" He speaks my name, falling down before me. "I need a Healer!" He shouts but I was getting so tired. "Is it over-with?" He asks of me but I mutter out only two words: Loghain and dead.
I am being picked up. My body curling against the heavy chain armor of the man who carries me. A growing blackness takes me over but I urge myself to fight it. I want to live, I tell myself. "Teagan..." I call out for him. My hands finding his face in the process. Blood smearing across it from my fingertips. "I am here." He replies but there was worry in his tone. "I want to go home..." I mutter under ragged breaths but he seems to understand. "You cannot, Elissa." He corrects me but I try to fight the urge to sleep. "Then... let me die in peace?" He stops, I can feel him shift his weight. His own haunted gaze moves around the bloodied battlefield. "My lord, is that..." I can hear a cough from Teagan but I try to stay awake. "Perth, get the horses ready. We leave for Redcliffe and we are taking Elissa with us." I cough, the blood falling from my lips but that does not stop him from picking up the pace.
As the growing darkness takes over, I see only the retreating figure of Denerim and Teagan looking down to me, a small smile upon his lips.
One month since the Fifth Blight had ended. One month since I supposedly died upon the battlefield. One month since I had found I was pregnant. And now I sit before the man who saved my life that night and for many other nights after such. "Marriage?" I blink but he does not waver. "People will ask questions when you start to show." He presses. "But marriage?" I mutter, utterly dumbfounded. "That does not leave me much choice, I suppose." He moves to his feet, quick and light, something I have grown quite accustom to. "But won't they ask questions as to who I am?" I press, my fingers weaving together. Pulling at each other in a nervous twitch. "I will not lie to them if they ask." But the question left in the air was who would ask. "Does Alistair know?" I ask of him but he gives me a simple smile, one that I have also grown accustom to. "He knows of my offer for marriage but does not know of you." He answers as plainly as possible.
"Then yes, I will marry you." I move to my feet, suddenly feeling more nervous than before we started this conversation. "I do not want you to marry me if you think that it is necessary." I pressure him but he does not budge. "I would rather marry you than someone who would take me for granted." I take it as a compliment, I suppose. "And if I may ask you the same?" He moves around the study, standing only a few feet away. "I have grown to care for you Teagan, I think I can even grow to love you in the future." He smiles but weakly, only I return it this time. "Then that is all I ask."
One month after our little discussion, we were married. With a small lavish ceremony before the head of the Redcliffe Chantry, I did not mind. I would have preferred to have an even more private ceremony but I did this for Teagan. I agreed to this and I will make things work or at least try.
That night, we kept our distance from each other. He looked me over but I did not know what to say. On one hand I have only been with two men in my life. Both whom I loved more than I have ever thought. Only to lose one at the hands of Arl Howe and later, to the hands of fate. Our paths were no longer important, I have come to accept this just as I have come to accept the man standing before me. "Elissa..." He speaks my name but a smile of recognition comes to my lips and eyes. "Teagan," His name falls from my lips in an almost purring sound. "We don't have to do this now... if you wish?" We both felt the same. We felt as if we were rushing this and in truth we did rush this. "Let's wait?" I offer though apart of me regretted the offer. "I am fine with waiting." He says to me but I can see something else. "Are you sure?" I press but he smiles, the small smile I have come to love. "Yes, I am quite sure."
The next morning, we had breakfast. Quietly sitting across from each other. "A letter came this morning," Teagan speaks to me but I shrug, chewing upon a buttered biscuit. "It seems King Alistair and Eammon are coming," I look up as the biscuit falls from my mouth, landing within the bowl of porridge I had almost finished. "If you would like, I understand we can go away while they are here. Perhaps to Orlais?" I blink, a little at a loss for words. "But what about Eammon?" I ask him but he moves to his feet. "Do not worry, Elissa, Eammon will understand when he arrives and we are already gone." But what of Alistair, I ask myself. Instead I should feel grateful but I felt as if I was betraying him. Despite what he had said to me for letting Loghain live. Those words still stung when I thought about them.
"That sounds wonderful, Teagan." He smiles a little more but I have come to appreciate him.
Just as Leliana had described to me, Orlais was magnificent. The city we came to stay within was the capital; Val Royeaux. The small estate we were staying within, was comfortable. We had a small group of servants, Ser Perth and few guards but I did not fear any of them. In fact I was quite grateful for the privacy within the small estate. Though most of my time was spent wandering the city, I did however spend the other times vomiting. Yes, well I was not prepared for it. I could not keep anything down and this struck fear within both Teagan and I. Despite the fact we both have never been through this process we had visited the Chantry of Andraste only to learn that this was a common thing. I was a little confused at first but the Mother explained everything to me. Going over each and every little detail that we could possibly go through. My main fear, however, was if I would live through the pregnancy. This fear must have worried Teagan as well for we hit the libraries within the city that stored the history of the Grey Wardens. We had learned there were a few female Wardens who had children and had survived the birth. But I was more worried for the children sake. It came to my understanding that the children lived, most of the time.
We sat within the study of the small estate. Stacks of books before us both, he sighed setting the book he was reading down before him. "I do not understand, why don't we just ask the Orlesian Wardens?" I look up from the book as it rested upon my already showing stomach. "If I ask them, they will pressure me into staying. I do not want that." I clearly point this out. "Please, let us just find out as much as we can. If... if it comes down to it I will travel to Weisshaupt Fortress." He looks up to me but we both know how that could end. I would be asked to stay and I will have no say in the matter.
I move from where I was sitting, setting the book down upon the large stacks upon the small table between us. He moves over in his seat, his eyes looking away from me but though I was a little grateful for his hesitant nature I on the other hand didn't quite know how to handle myself in this situation. I was grateful that I was not alone. "Teagan," I speak his name as he looks over to me, watching me settle down next to him. "From what I have read the children survive without the taint in their system. As do the mother's..." His hand lifts, cupping my cheek gently. "We have only heard of two female Wardens who had lived through the birth. The others have all died." There was worry within his gaze but I smile, turning my lips to kiss the palm of his hand. "Then let us pray and see what the Maker has in store for the both of us."
Only three months after Orlais, we returned to Redcliffe. Slightly grateful to be home and yet afraid of what the Arl and the King could have found out while they were here. But much to my own surprise, the servants and the new Chamberlain kept everything quiet about me. I was grateful for this kind gesture but they did not mind. They were quite happy with keeping things quiet. They had stayed only for a few weeks and left immediately for Denerim. As for why, I did not know but I was glad to be back. My feet were swollen, my stomach stuck out and I ate everything in sight. Despite what the Healer had told us it was much to our own surprise when she brought a Midwife to us.
The elderly woman was kind, gentle and when she touched my sixth month large stomach she smiled. "Twins," she says looking to me to see my own reaction it would seem. But I was completely white. "T-t-twins?" She nods, impressed by this fact. "Are you sure?" Teagan asks from where he was sitting beside me. "Quite, actually." But... there were a million to one thoughts running rapid within my mind at this point. "There are two separate heartbeats, if you place your hand here..." she takes Teagan's hand without asking of him and places it upon my bare stomach. I gasp, his touch was so warm. Nothing like I had expected. His eyes close as he takes a breath, obviously not expecting our first inmate touch to be one like this. But his eyes fly open within the same second of touching me. "I can feel them... they are quite strong." He sounded amazed and I did not like the idea of being the kick ball for these two. "If you have trouble sleeping, let me know and I will mix you up something. Otherwise, I must say congratulations." Her eyes twinkle as she let's go of Teagan's hand but I don't mind his hand staying put. "Now that you are towards the end. I will need to come by once a week to check up on you." That was something to look forward too, I suppose. "Is there anything I should know, before I start making the appropriate poultices?" I glance around. Those within the room were close confidants. "I... I am a Grey Warden." I calmly say but she did not seemed surprised. "I had a feeling I knew you from somewhere." My eyes narrow slightly. "Well, it seems you do not know of the news then."
She moved away from us as Teagan's hand drops from my stomach. "What news?" He presses and she looks away. "Please, the rest of you... leave us for a bit." They bow their heads but I fix my shirt back over my stomach. "What news?" I ask her, Teagan seemed just as worried as I. "They did not find your body upon the top of the Fort only a fortnight ago. It was by decree of King Alistair that if anyone were to see you, they were to report to him. I believe it was more so for worry then anything else." She smiles a little when she turns back around to face us. "But I will not speak of this to anyone, for it is obvious to me that you deserve this. You have risked everything to save Ferelden and given an old Hero his faith back. Upon this fact, I will gladly keep your secret." But she wanted something in return. "And what would you want in return?" Teagan asks of her, almost as if he had read my mind. "To live here, to help you raise your children and to spend the rest of my years in a happy splendor. And if you two end up having more children, you will have a midwife on hand." Her eyes twinkle with those words but I share a look with Teagan. "Alright, we accept your terms." With a bow of her head, thus was the start of the rest of my nine months.
During the last set of months I had left with this pregnancy, it was during a late night excursion to the Larder that I was greeted by a familiar bark. My war hound, my Mabari had found his way to me through all of the tribulations only for me to run smack into Sten. The giant Qunari looked down to me but his harden face relaxed a bit, seeing me in such a state must have reminded him of our conversations about being female and our place within this world. "So, why are you in my kitchen?" I ask but he crosses his arms before him. "It was your hound who brought me here." It was? I look behind him to see Louie's head buried within the pork bits I had given him only awhile ago. "Are you heading back to your people?" He shifts his weight, but there was a small grateful smile there. "Yes, I can return to them now – thanks to you." Oh, right the sword. "You're welcome, Sten." I smile but much to my own surprise he touches my large stomach. "They will make fine warriors, Kadan." I feel the heat rise to my cheeks but his hand drops from my stomach. "Thank you, Sten." I feel the tears rise within my eyes but I cannot stop them. Since I had come this far within my own pregnancy, my emotional state has been... erratic. "Do not cry, Kadan. I knew you were alive but I could not stay with that man who you thought was worthy of your affections." He spoke of Alistair, I knew of this and his own impression of Alistair in general.
"Stay for the night, Sten?" His face doesn't relax, for it returns to his same harden stare. "I cannot Kadan. I only wished to return your hound to you, so you will have someone to protect you." I shift my weight when I hear the happy bark from Louie. "But I must go now. I know we may never see each other again but remember, you are the first I have come to call Kadan and I am honored to have fought along side of you." I blink back the tears when he turns to leave. Before I could react, my arms are around his middle. He doesn't move when he hears my cries but instead he weights for them to stop. "Be strong, Kadan. For what you may encounter in the future will be more difficult for you to avoid." He gave my hands a squeeze and disappeared through the servants passage out of the Castle.
The next morning I told Teagan of what had happened and he didn't seem so surprised by the encounter. "At least this gives me the excuse to purchase some Mabari." He looks down to Louie but it was the happy, lopsided grin from the beast that causes him to laugh. "If you wouldn't mind, I know of someone who would make for a fine Kennel Master." I offer and Teagan bows his head to me. "As you wish, Lissa." A smirk plays across his lips but I only laugh, returning it.
"Lissa, pack some clothes." I look up from the book I was reading but it was the heavy breathing from Teagan that tells me there is more to this. "Why?" I ask of him but he grips my elbow, moving me to my feet quickly. "Eammon and King Alistair are arriving soon to speak with me and... I want you to go with Helena and Perth. Take Ashalle and Baldwin with you, as well as Louie. There is a small estate in the middle of the Lake that is very private." I blink, utterly lost but I knew his urgency. "If the children come, Baldwin will send his hawk to tell let me know." I grimace not wanting to move much since I was well past my own due date. By two weeks, exactly.
I do not waver when he helps me find spare clothing and hand me a pack. "Be careful, my love." And for the first time in my life, he kisses me. His lips were gentle, hesitating but I press them further. Parting his own to meet my own, my hands wrapping around his neck, bringing him down to my own height. He pulls away when there came a knock at our door. "My lord, we must go." Perth stands behind him and I pull away. "I promise you, I will be there as soon I can." He kisses my forehead as I am being whisked away with Perth towards another hidden passage leading down to the lake.
The boat rocking side to side makes my stomach churn a few times, feeling this queasy seemed almost natural. Until I start to throw up over the boat. Helena holds my hair back from my mouth as the house comes into view. The small dock was a welcoming sight at least. We pull up at the side but Baldwin stays with the dock. I do not ask as to why because I already knew, he would wait.
The moment my foot hits the front step, the pain comes. It was so utterly overwhelming that I clutch my stomach. The sharp stabbing spreads through out my whole body, tears clutch my eyes as I fall to my knees. "My lady!" I hear Perth's worried call behind me and the gentle licking from Louie against my cheeks. "I'm... fine..." I groan but the pain is almost too much for me. "Quickly, pick her up and follow me!" I can hear Helena ahead of us as I am being picked up by Perth. He cradles me, as I can hear the terrified whines from Louie as he follows behind us.
I am set upon the bed but something wet spreads through my gown, causing me to scream in more pain but Helena stuffs some sort of cloth between my teeth. "Bite down on this, it will help." I am tired suddenly, I close my eyes but the last thing I hear is Helena barking orders to get the Bann here as soon as possible.
For the next twelve hours I was in labor. The pain was unbearable but Helena stuck by my side through it all. I grip the ungloved hand of Perth as we wait for Teagan to get here. I scream, I bite down upon the cloth between my teeth but the pain was too much. Nothing helped me through this as I can hear Helena between my legs. "Almost there, darling." She speaks to me gently, pushing me to keep going. "Push, just push." Perth mutters in my ear but I squeeze down upon his hand and I hear the grunt of pain from him in the process. "I can see the head!" Helena cries but I do not know how to keep going. I push and push and after nearly two hours of pushing, I held two small children in my arms. She brushes away the sweat from my head with a cool cloth when the bedroom door swings open abruptly.
Teagan stood there, trying to catch his breath. "I'm sorry... I couldn't make it here sooner..." He apologizes but it was when his eyes land upon me, everything within him relaxes. A gentle, carefree smile replaces the breathless look in his eyes. "Maker's breath, you're beautiful." I look up to him, giving him a small sheepish grin as I hand the children to Helena. She picks them up, carefully and hands them both to Teagan. Helping him positioning them in each arm he looks between the two of them. "A boy and a girl, it would seem." I let my head fall back against the pillows. "Do you have a name for them?" He asks of me as he moves to the newly set up cribs for them.
"Maric Duncan Bryce Guerrin and Eleanor Morrigan Rowan Guerrin." A smile eases across his lips so naturally that even I give him another sheepish grin. "They will bring honor back within those names, I think." That was all I asked. I reach my hand out to him and he moves to the bed, settling down next to me. "Remind me, to give Ser Perth a gift for sticking through this." I yawn, resting my head upon his shoulder. "Sleep, you need it." With a kiss upon my forehead I do not ask for nothing more as I relax against him, letting the sleep overwhelm me.
A/N: I know there were quite a few of you who had this story already alerted but I want to aplogize for restarting it. I did not like how it went at first so I decided to start anew. There will still be some heavy moments through the story but there will also be some hiliarious moments as well! Which shall make for some excitment! As usual, enjoy as I continue to work on this story. It might not be as long as I had planned but this should be entertaining, none the less! Much love! And I hope everyone enjoys it! ;)
I do not own Dragon Age, it belongs to Bioware! *-*