it's been a while i know, but i still plan to finish the story. I know I said it would take awhile but it wasn't supposed to take this long.
so here goes... hope you're still interested...
All Dreams Come to an End – Part II
It's amazing how things can change so fast. Everything was going so well only a couple of hours ago, what happened?
Isn't there supposed to be a moment in life where everything falls into place? Maybe that was just wishful thinking but even people with the most unfortunate circumstances at least got a break somewhere.
Life was just a mix of total confusion at this moment.
Justin disappears.
Justin reappears.
And then Justin leaves again, this time on his own accord…
The cycle may have been broken as of this evening.
It was uncertain whether Justin was ever going to return again?
Time had a way of passing by so effortlessly.
It was now 2 in the morning.
Carey and the twins sat at the table restlessly hoping for Kurt to return home with Justin, hoping that this misunderstanding could be cleared up, and everyone could go back to enjoying their moment of true happiness.
It was still unclear as to what drove Kurt to his momentary insanity. He only halfway explained things as he ran out the door with a gun, telling Carey to keep the boys safe.
If he was making another rash decision, it was probably better not knowing what he was up to, but still they were all wondering what he was going to do next.
Zack looked at the clock realizing that it was the same time it was when they were all at the table being told their third brother existed.
He was sitting in the same exact chair; so was Cody, and so was mom. It was an eerie sense of Deja Vu.
Cody twiddled his thumbs at the table.
He felt a little awkward that he passed out from shock in front of everybody. He was slightly embarrassed that he couldn't handle reality.
It made him wonder if he was really capable of accepting the fact life wasn't perfect, accepting Justin for who he was, or if he would shriek at every imperfection his brother had.
Cody didn't want to think it, but was it really meant to happen, Justin leaving their lives forever?
Many thoughts crossed the twins' minds, but none of them reached the depths of thinking going through Carey's mind.
She was thinking of the first true and unfortunately last conversation she had with Justin only a couple days earlier.
Two Evenings Ago…
Carey laid in the center of the table after slipping away from the boys room in desperate need for a drink, it was especially quiet this time of the evening, she was sleeping away the red wine that had knocked her out cold. All three of the boys had gone to sleep. It was strange thinking of the number 'three'. Tonight was Justin's first night with his reunited family. If that wasn't enough stress to handle, he was also borderline crazy. It was obvious that it didn't take much of anything to put her out of her misery; all she had to do was close her eyes. It had been quite an interesting day, and the evening wouldn't be anything short of another wild ride.
There was a tiny noise drifting into the kitchen that sounded like a far off dream, but to Carey's surprise, when she opened her eyelids half way, Justin was sitting right next to her with hands scribbling across a piece of paper.
She immediately woke up startled.
"Yikes!"
Justin blankly stared at her for a minute creating an inner discomfort within Carey. Then as if nothing happened, he once again faced the table where he was drawing.
She looked at the clock on the stove that read 3am.
"Whoa… it's pretty late. I'd better get off to bed, I have to rehearse tomorrow."
Then Carey noticed that all around her were hundreds of pieces of papers around the house littered on the walls, all over the table, and even some hanging on the refrigerator.
The word 'wow' seeped out of her mouth with little emphasis. It was more of a fearful expression than one of amazement.
Carey watched Justin as he continued with his rapid drawing, briskly scribbling across sheet after sheet of paper.
He had that concentrated look on his face again, tuning out the world around him.
Carey decided to smile it off; she didn't want him to get the impression that she was afraid of him, but then she noticed that he had a few red scrapes across his face.
"What happened to your cheek?"
Justin plainly replied, "It's nothing."
He never looked up.
Carey automatically switched to her motherly mode and immediately tried to fix the problem.
"Here let me get you a Band-Aid sweetie."
Justin with his head still facing the drawing motioned for her to stop.
"Don't worry about it. Wounds heal faster when exposed to the air."
Carey eased back into her chair. For a while she half sleepily listened to the constant sound of scribbling.
It was almost soothing, like the sound of an air conditioner.
She was so fascinated by his level of concentration, even though she knew little about her son, she could see that he was very ambitious.
Nothing could stop Justin from getting what he wanted.
He was a perfectionist.
Drawing one page after another she noticed that he had the mindset of a cartoonist.
While each drawing he made resembled each piece after the other, some were slightly different like he was putting together a flipbook in his mind in which any moment it would all come to life.
But for now, it was just the hard pressed lines of black scarring each piece of paper with bitter emotion.
"So… couldn't sleep?" She finally asked.
Justin made no effort to stop what he was doing, instead he replied under his breath.
"I don't sleep."
Carey noticed that Justin wasn't wearing the clothes he had worn out of the shower anymore.
Instead he was dressed all in black. It looked like he borrowed a couple pieces of clothing from the boys. His hair was all black too, the same way it was in the first picture she saw of him.
"I can see you've been a little busy."
She slightly gestured towards his clothes acknowledging his makeover.
"Three identical brothers, is much too awkward." Justin whispered once again under his breath. He tossed another sheet of paper to the ground, and grabbed another.
Half jokingly Carey replied,
"Yeah. Tell me about it."
"Besides, there's too much on my mind, too many questions, for too many people. Questions that keep me up all night."
"What kind of questions?"
Justin's rapid moving came to a stop, he looked at his mother as if she had said something wrong. Maybe he was afraid to tell.
"Well… some questions are simple, and then, there are those really complicated questions that even I don't really understand."
A police siren echoed from the streets causing a stir within Justin.
Suddenly his eyes widened then immediately he slipped away from the table to gaze outside the window.
For a moment he stood there and then he began to check all around the metal frames to make sure that there weren't any cracks, then nonchalantly he closed up everything and placed the curtains neatly in place.
"Why do you do that?" Carey asked.
"Do what?"
"Since your arrival, you've been on some sort of paranoid streak, checking all around the house for things out of place, opening and closing doors an unnecessary amount of times. Is something wrong?"
Justin looked up.
"It's the voice inside my head."
Carey grew a little suspicious. She watched her son's facial expressions to see if he was being sarcastic.
"The voice inside your head?"
"I hear it all of the time, every time I walk through the halls, every time when I try to sleep, and every time I try to think. I try to draw what it tells me to draw so that maybe I can make sense of it all but I end up even more confused. It's the same voice that tells me about the mission."
"Sacrificial Redemption?" Carey quoted. She remembered Justin saying that to Cody when he was at the crisis center.
Justin nodded his head to verify her inquiry.
"The voice warns me of things to come, it's telling me right now… to be very careful of my tracks. It also came to me tonight stronger than ever. It's trying to take over me."
"Have you tried fighting it?" she asked.
Justin stared directly into his mother eyes from across the room, and in a whisper he said,
"All of the time."
The floor creaked as Justin made his way back to the kitchen table. He sat back down and picked up a crayon to continue his scribbling but he paused. Instead he pushed the paper aside and folded his hands.
"Sometimes I think that I'm fighting a losing battle… I think that I've been poisoned with no cure. I believe the past will never become a distant memory. It's like this is part of my destiny, like the ordinary life was never meant for me. What keeps me up at night is the question I've asked myself all of the time… how long will I be able to fight until this war claims my soul?"
Knock, knock, knock!
Carey broke her concentration when she heard somebody at her door.
Was it Justin? Was Kurt standing there with him?
In unison the boys and Carey jumped out of their seats and rushed to the door, after flinging it open, they saw Kurt standing there with his head faced down.
He was covered in dirt, street gravel, and his feet had tracked mud everywhere. The boys had never seen their father look so pitiful.
There was no sign of Justin…
Kurt didn't even have to say anything; he knew that he failed miserably. Regardless, he was allowed back into the suite. He deserved to get yelled at, slapped, everything imaginable to express anger, but nobody did anything. They understood that Kurt was genuinely confused and that he acted out of fear.
Although the family was ready to forgive his actions, Kurt wasn't ready to forgive himself.
It wasn't easy accepting the fact that he bought into the lie so eagerly. There was something that Kurt was not telling the rest of his family, something that was very important.
For now it was quiet. The numerous amount of people at the after party had vanished into the night, people had gone to sleep, if anyone were to stare from outside of the hotel they would only see one tiny light coming from one window up high.
Zack was noticeably frustrated that his brother hadn't come home. Why would something as small as this have such an affect on Justin? He's been through so much worse hasn't he? Although Zack didn't try to sugarcoat the scene of events that had happened earlier, he was not the type to understand the deep emotional symbolism behind the gunshot.
This wasn't about being shot at; it was more of a statement, a statement proclaiming that Justin would never be welcomed in this world. This was something Zack would never understand; he hardly ever had a moment of deep thought and the true meaning behind Justin's departure Zack would never understand.
He treaded into his room and shut the door leaving the others by themselves.
Carey remained in her silent mode of thought; she was taking this pretty hard, as she couldn't stop thinking about Justin.
The only one with enough strength to talk was Cody.
Feeling that he needed to regain a sense of self-redemption, Cody wanted to find any answers that could lead to the return of his long lost brother.
"Dad what happened, you said that Justin was in danger. What did you mean by that?"
Kurt slowly turned his head towards his confused son. What was he going to say to him?
"You wouldn't understand Cody. It doesn't matter anymore. Justin will never be the same again."
Cody couldn't quite understand what his father was telling him, it's like he gave up trying. It wasn't like his father to just readily admit defeat. Why is he acting this way?
"Dad if we find him everything will be okay, he can come back home and be happy with us. He doesn't have to be afraid anymore."
Cody felt strengthened by his own words. He thought to himself, 'Justin made it this far without being torn down, he could find his way back, and all it would take was a little hope. Dad would just have to realize that, Mom too.
She shouldn't have to cry about this, Justin would return. Why is everyone giving up? It's only been a couple of hours; Justin needs time to come to his senses that's all. Maybe I should tell all of them what I'm thinking; it may be what everyone needs to hear. I'm tired of losing hope in everything.'
Cody looked over to his father and was about to say something encouraging but…
Looking at this person, it was apparent that dad was hiding something deep inside, like he had an extremely guilty conscience.
His father was nearly in tears. It was like he knew for a fact that Cody's dream of a happy family would never happen. There was conviction in his worrisome emotions.
Kurt managed to get a few words out of his mouth despite the fact that he practically made a vow to himself to never speak of this.
" It's too late Cody… I saw him. I saw him leave. He… Justin is never coming back."
Cody noticed that his dad's hands were fidgeting. It wasn't like him to be so nervous, something was definitely wrong here.
"What do you mean by that?"
Cody asked, hoping that it was just a misuse of words. Maybe dad meant something different.
"I let him slip away."
Still, those words felt misused in some way. Why does he keep saying it like that? 'You let him slip away?' That doesn't make sense. Maybe it would be better to ask again slowly.
"Dad… what are you say-"
"-Cody!" Kurt snapped.
He was visibly frustrated. The words he needed to say to his son wouldn't come out because even he was afraid to admit the truth.
Cody finally paused long enough for his dad to finish.
"Cody. What I'm saying is… I'm saying Justin went back to his old home."
There was a small pause.
'That's it?' Cody thought. 'That's what you were trying to say? What's so hard about saying that? All we have to do is catch up with him and this will all be over.'
He felt slightly relieved.
"Then lets go back and get him dad, he couldn't have gone that far, besides it's not really that long of a drive."
" No… You don't understand… Justin went back to his old home, he's going to be a soldier again…"
The silence resumed again, this time it wasn't for a short period of time. It was one of those moments when all of the hairs on you arms stood up because you could feel the delayed shock about to rise forth and take over your entire body.
"What!" Zack yelled.
He had just walked out of the room, right into the conversation hearing the earth shattering news.
Carey immediately turned her attention towards her ex-husband.
The color drained from Cody's face. He couldn't believe what he just heard.
"Dad, how can that be… Justin was rescued from that life. I saw it on T.V."
With tears running down Kurt's face, he placed his hands on Cody's shoulders.
"You saw what they wanted you to see Cody. We were all tricked.
From the moment we all laid eyes on Justin we all became part of a conspiracy that ended up helping your brother finish his training. We were all pieces to a giant puzzle. Now that Justin is officially a soldier, there is no need for him to remember or care about us."
" That's BULLSHIT!!! H-How can you say that Dad? Justin would NEVER forget about us, don't EVER say something like that again!!!"
"Cody, listen to me!"
"Y-You don't know Justin like I do Dad! He likes it here, he likes being around us, he likes going outside to play, and he likes being free!"
"Cody that's not the point. Justin has been raised to believe in one thing, and one thing alone. The mission. It's the first thing on his mind when he wakes up, and it's the last thing that he thinks of before he goes to sleep."
"But he likes it here…"
Cody's voice was starting to drown in the oncoming tears. It was as if he was trying to convince himself all over again.
"Justin has been controlled his whole life, to him, it doesn't matter what he likes, it never mattered. Justin might really want this life, he might really want to stay, but one domineering ruler in his life has overpowered all of his senses. It's because of that, we will never see him again."
Zack was in total shock. This couldn't be possible.
The way he saw Justin's face light up when he took him on the bus ride to the park, he had such a thirst for all the life that was around him.
Or maybe…
Just maybe,
Could it be that deep down inside Justin knew all of this was going to happen?
Is this why he checked everything around him every time he made a move, or when he would inspect all the doors three times, the windowsills, and the curtains?
Is that why he couldn't sleep, is that why late at night he would be talking to himself in a panicky voice?
"Oh my god… this… this explains everything." Zack thought.
For the first time he realized something on his own that not even Cody could grasp…
Justin was never a freak.
He was just a scared kid that knew he only had a short time to enjoy all the things around him because one day it would all disappear.
That's why Justin had to touch everything, smell everything, observe to the tiniest of every detail around him…
He was taking mental notes the whole time.
The memory of Justin's voice flashed back into Zack's mind,
"That is the question of the hour isn't it brother. What could this… monster, this inhumane creature, this… soldier, possibly want from you people?"
Zack felt ashamed that he ever thought Justin was anything less than human, even when he kept telling himself not to think that.
" I came here, not to learn about your life… but to live it. I want to know the people you know, see the world you have seen, live the life that I was never meant to have. You yourself told me that I haven't seen the real life, so I cant be doomed. Isn't that right?"
The cutthroat words Zack said to his brother stabbed at his own soul. Zack could remember so clearly what he said.
" you've lived such a different life you can't even tell if what your doing is good or bad. Your scale measures from bad to worse."
How could he have been so cruel to his brother? Even throughout all the things he said, Justin didn't let that stop him.
"I don't care! I don't want to end up like the rest of my brothers, dead since the day they were born."
It was Justin's determination that has kept him alive in everyone's hearts.
A small tear ran down Zack's eye.
He began to understand that the emotion he always fought so hard to shield from the rest of the family was a natural response to his fears, sorrows, and guilt being exposed into the light.
He needed Justin, like everyone needed Justin.
At this moment Zack realized that if he saw his brother right now, he wouldn't be able to thank Justin enough for not listening to him. 'Look at what he has become in our lives' he thought. 'Justin was the missing puzzle piece we never knew was lost. Look at what his very presence brought. Mom and dad have never seen so much of each other in this span of time. Sure it was hard for them to pretend hating each other, but you could see that by their actions, they still managed to be in the same room as each other. Zack wasn't so naïve to believe that they were going to get back together or anything, but the fact that they both cared so much about Justin brought them closer together.
As for Zack and Cody, Justin's arrival has caused a change within those two that has also forced them closer. Zack was beginning to think for himself a little more now that he realized that Cody couldn't do everything for him, Cody has slowly forced himself away from the books to focus on a much greater mystery, and his venture has been worthwhile. Justin was like a complicated riddle that caused both boys to open their minds to different possibilities.
Cody was never really big on skateboards, or any kind of sport really until he tried to teach Justin about it. Now that Zack could clear his mind of all obstacles, he could begin to understand much more about himself, his family, and how hard it would be…
…to imagine life without Justin.
Neither person in that room knew how to express the angst they were feeling. But in the midst of all this, something seemed a little odd.
"Kurt how do you know all of this?" Carey asked.
Amidst the pandemonium lied a simple question that was not ready to be answered.
Kurt froze at that moment.
He didn't know what to say.
Although he knew the answer simple and plain, he didn't know how he was going to let his family know a secret much darker that the one he and Carey had been harboring from the boys. This was perhaps just as sinister as Justin's departure in the middle of the night.
"Kurt how do you know all of this?"
Beneath all the pandemonium lied a plot, a plot that was horrific beyond all reason, even if Kurt regretted doing it after all of this time, there was no turning back the clock.
What's done has been done.
From this point it would not matter how guilty Kurt felt, it would not matter because he would never be forgiven…
"Kurt!"
He looked around at his family concentrating intensely in his direction. He saw worried faces, and looks of concern. It was time to tell everything, everything from the start.
Kurt hesitantly replied, "I know this because I was part of it."
A shockwave of horror erupted a chill down the spines of all bystanders. The magnitude of those words caused a sense of overwhelming emotion within Carey, her mouth dropped open and almost immediately Kurt became a different person in her eyes, as if she was staring at something not quite human.
How was she supposed to react to this news?
What emotion are you supposed to choose when confronted with such a foreign concept like family betrayal?
Do you execute harsh judgment with no mercy to the individual or do you sift through this tragic revelation to find out the one truth that is more important than anything ever could be at this very moment, to ask the one question that could change everything… 'Was Justin betrayed by his own father?'
The twins backed away from their father like a virus. They would've never imagined their own father having anything to do with this.
Cody timidly stared at his father and became horrified. Of all the possible answers he could've been prepared for, this one didn't even register as a possibility. He felt like he was stabbed a million times in the stomach, he grabbed his sides and slowly sat himself on the ground so that his legs would not give out from trembling too much. He could feel himself break into a cold sweat of panic. Kurt looked down at his son but Cody could stare no more, he turned his head towards the ground and wrapped himself completely into a ball, shielding his mind from what he had just heard.
Kurt leaned down and placed a hand on Cody's shoulder.
Zack's reaction was of a completely different nature. Watching his father stand there turned his emotions to anger and disgust.
"Get. Away. From my brother." Zack emphasized every word.
His hands were balled up into tight little fists. It looked like he was going to attack his father.
Kurt could feel the intensity, he didn't want to cause any more anger but that would prove to be futile. He removed his hand and backed away from Cody. He looked away from both boys only to confront another face, Carey's.
"Kurt you were part of this…why? Why would you do something like that? Why would you turn against your own son? How could you?"
Kurt stepped forward.
"It's not what you think Carey."
She immediately backed away.
"No!" She pointed her finger. "You stay right there! Don't come near me! You just told me you were part of the reason Justin's never coming back, how can it not be what I think?"
Kurt tried to sound reasonable, he tried the best he could to get Carey to listen to him but the moment was just too intense.
"You don't understand. I was tricked too!"
"You know what Kurt, save it for somebody who cares! I am sick and tired of wondering if you are ever telling me the truth or not, I am tired of finding out some newfound revelation that ends up screwing with my life, our kids lives! This time you really have gone too far, and I can't keep dealing with this Kurt! What did you do? You know what, it doesn't even matter!"
Carey's face was starting to turn different shades of red.
"I try hard to overlook your faults, I really do! Every time something like this happens, I realize why we split up in the first place!" Carey was yelling so loud she was starting to see stars.
"I think I'm going to blackout," she mumbled.
Zack and Cody rushed over to their mom who was only moments away from passing out. The twins combined their efforts to keep their mom from falling onto the floor.
Kurt was beginning to get a little frustrated; he was taking quite a verbal beating.
Silently he mumbled, "You just never seem to forgive and forget do you?"
Carey let out a small sarcastic laugh then soon she fell silent. She looked up and stared right into her ex husband's eyes.
"It's hard to forgive and forget when you keep doing the same thing Kurt."
Carey laid her head on Zack's shoulder, now she was getting a headache.
Kurt knew it was time to admit defeat. He knew he hurt Carey so many times and this was just another thing to add to the very long list of disappointments. But this time he couldn't just run in a different direction. The truth had to come out, and it had to come out now or he would never regain either of his boy's respect, or worse, they would never want to see him again.
No matter how hard this would be Kurt could not allow himself to give up on this.
"Listen… My role in this came way before we ever met Justin." Kurt said, desperately attempting to plead his case.
Carey turned away from Kurt in anger. She didn't want to hear anything he had to say. She tried to drown out his words.
Kurt knew she didn't want to listen but he kept talking anyway.
"…This was way before we ever had kids…"
Carey still tried to erase his words from her mind. But it wasn't until Kurt's final words that she would begin to listen.
"…This was way before I met you…"
Carey looked towards the horrible creature standing in front of her.
Suddenly she was able to see a glimmer of humanity within his eyes, something was telling her that she should hear what Kurt had to say.
Her tear-streaked face of disgust was slowly beginning to dissipate. Carey knew that she had to listen carefully because the fate of their entire family's future rested within the plea of a man who has made too many mistakes in the past. Regardless, she was willing to give Kurt a fraction of a chance to explain himself.
The boys managed to drag their mother to a nearby chair. Carey was beginning to calm down just a little.
"Kurt… what happened?"
Kurt was surprised; they're giving him a chance…
It was doomsday for him, and he had one shot to save his own life.
"I already know what all of you are thinking right now… but I would never intentionally betray Justin!"
The tidal wave of tension began to settle. Zack's angry face vanished for the moment, Cody looked to his father eager for the much needed explanation.
"Before this moment, Justin had every possibility in the world of coming back. He showed so much promise and so much hope but now… his fate rests in the hands of an insane dictator… a dictator that I met a long time ago…"
Kurt stopped for just a moment. They were all still listening to him despite the fact that he told them the first half of the story; it was time to go deeper.
"When I was 17 years old, I had just dropped out of school with really no ambitions to pursue any type of career. It seemed like the greatest thing to do at the time so I went ahead with a couple of friends and tried to enlist in the army. Needless to say, my application was rejected because I didn't have certain qualifications, but on the same day I was cast out of the only possible future I could've had, a man in a limousine pulled up to me and asked me a couple of questions that didn't seem to matter at the time. He asked me if I had history of mental illness, or physical disabilities, I said no. Then he offered me a job, a job I so desperately needed. I never expected it to come back and haunt me after all of these years."
It wasn't easy for Kurt to let all of this out because he had been keeping this dark secret for so long it felt like he was placing his entire journal of hidden mysteries out on display for the world to see.
Luckily Carey and the boys were holding on to each and every word he was saying.
"What type of job did they give you?"
Kurt was distracted, he paid no attention to whoever asked the question, but he knew everyone wanted to know.
"I was a test subject."
Kurt's legs were getting tired so he sat down.
"It was supposed to be for research stuff like cold medicines, hair products, stuff like that. Well, at least that's what I thought. The things that I went through were completely different. They would keep me for hours at a time, sometimes overnight. I was suspicious about the things they were doing but the pay was just too good. I didn't want to risk losing my job by asking too many questions. They'd give me certain shots that would boost my strength for a small period of time, and there were some tests that allowed me to see incredibly long distances… now that I think of it, I wore glasses for eight years of my life and after they had finally cut me loose permanently from their research labs, I've had perfect vision ever since. After a couple of months, the rest of my symptoms faded away and I never had any side affects from them."
"What does this have to do with Justin?" Carey asked.
"This has everything to do with Justin. Don't you see? They had to have kept an eye on me ever since I left that lab a long time ago, checking to see if anything different would happen to me, something abnormal. Now I'm beginning to realize they weren't looking for results from me Carey. They were looking for results from my offspring."
Kurt watched the expressions of the three confused family members.
"What does all of that mean Kurt?"
"Didn't you find it strange that the doctors never picked up on the third child with their machines in the hospital? You remember that same night when I told you what I had done with Justin, I told you a limousine stopped by and offered to take care of him right?"
Carey's mouth began to open wide with shock, realization and understanding.
"Justin might be a reaction caused by the drugs that flowed through my body. He might have the genes of a monster, I don't know for sure but there has to be a reason they're still trying so hard, someone must have found something. One thing that I do know is this, this is all one giant plan falling into place since before any of the boys were born Carey. That's why Justin's in danger, that's why the boys are in danger. There's no telling what Justin's capable of doing, or if he's even capable of doing any of the things they want him to do, and if he ends up being the opposite of what they want, there's no telling if the same people will come after Zack and Cody."
The room became still. To the boys, all of this was happening in one giant blur. Zack's frustration and confusion was replaced with curiosity.
He silently thought to himself, 'Where the hell did all of this scientific mumbo jumbo come from? What's all this talk about altered genes? This isn't star trek, or some futuristic world full of robotic soldiers. The future is not written in our genes, and Justin is not some kind of alien.'
This was like one long episode of the twilight zone that was getting even stranger by the minute.
'When will we all get to actually wake up from this and laugh about it? When will this family get a break from all this crap!'
No matter how bleak the future seemed at this point, Cody managed to think otherwise.
"Well, whatever they're looking for in Justin, they wont find. He is a perfectly normal kid like the rest of us. Justin's future is limitless with potential and he's going to come back to us regardless of what you think dad, so if you don't mind, I'm going to lay down and put all of this unnecessary pain and heartache to rest."
Cody's face showed courage and determination, but the moment he got up, stepped out of the living room into the dark recesses of his room, he closed the door both to shut out the negative emotions generated by the other family members, and metaphorically to suppress the undeniable pain rushing throughout each and every pore of his body.
He needed to be alone to think.
As he approached his bed and laid face down across the soft pillows, he turned towards the ceiling and began talking to the air.
"Justin… where are you? Come back to us, we need you… we need you just as much as you need us."
It seemed that within every grasp of potential happiness, came an overshadowing cloud.
How tragic to think that whenever something so horrible, so maniacal, so sad happened in the lives of the Martin family, it was to be expected.
Zack was too restless to go to bed; all he could do was stare at his parents who were staring right back at him.
"I… I'm so sorry I got all of you guys into this. I'm so sorry that I'm responsible for Justin being the way he is, I'm sorry for everything…"
"Will you stop saying that dad? You're willing to blame yourself for something you didn't know was going to happen?"
Kurt looked at his son puzzled.
"Well… I am the reason Jus"
Zack walked right up to Kurt.
"Do you realize how close I was to hating you? Don't ever do that to me again! You think I'm going to be mad at you for something that happened before I was born? Jeez!"
Kurt didn't know whether to be relieved or not.
"You mean… you're not mad?"
Zack put his hand in front of his dads face.
"Seriously dad stop talking! There are a lot more pressing matters here! We need to find Justin and we need to bring him to his home, his real home!"
For the first time that night Kurt was able to let out a smile of relief. He thought that his kids were going to hate him forever, and standing right in front of him was Zack telling him to forget everything that happened before.
"You really scared me dad. You made me think you were a monster."
Kurt was so happy he stood up and gave his son a hug, and Zack didn't feel weird about it either.
Carey was able to let out a smile too.
'Maybe this wasn't as bad as it really seemed. Cody was right after all when he said that Justin made it this far, the things that he had gone through have made him stronger than most adults. It's still possible that Justin could come back to us. All it will take is time.'
"So what do we do now?" Carey asked.
It wasn't so much as asking a question, it was more of stating the obvious. In this type of situation, what can you do?
Kurt finally let go of his forgiving son and turned around.
"We wait I guess…"
That's all the Martin family could do. Wait.
Wait for Justin, a brainwashed killer to track them down and murder them,
wait for Justin to come home with a smile on his face ready to start a real life with his real family, or perhaps wait for a resolution to this dark and eerie story that may never arrive.
Those were the choices set before them, but there was one thing that they all felt deep inside.
This was definitely not the last they would ever see of Justin.
Meanwhile…
Another time, another place…
There was nothing for Justin to see but darkness.
The windows remained closed at all times and neither the inside of the vehicle, or the sky gave away any source of light.
Only the rumbling sound of the engine underneath gave away the obvious notion that they were all still moving.
It seemed as if it had been forever since Justin left. The orange light that had dimmed the streets with its lantern glow was really the only time his instructor spoke to him. It was unusual for Miles to engage in conversation, as a matter of fact, the most Justin had ever heard him talk was when the master was introducing his natural parents to him.
How awkward the whole thing had felt, having to pretend to be confused. The whole set-up had been a laborious task from the beginning. There was so much Justin wanted to tell his mother that one night but couldn't because it would've jeopardized the mission. It was all a test anyway; the child crisis center didn't even exist. Every child there was playing the role of a defenseless soul when in fact every single one of them was capable of taking an individual out with their bare hands, girls too.
The child crisis center was in fact the largest of all training camps in the country. It was so well disguised, and it was the last place anybody would have ever thought to look.
' Trained from infancy to think of nothing but the mission,' it was exactly how Justin had remembered it when the instructor himself made the video that was eventually put on television.
The whole thing was political. Disguised as an advocate for child safety, Miles was able to get everybody to turn the other way, putting all trust into everything he said.
The one thing that Justin never did understand was why, why was he so important? What did Miles want from him that he couldn't get from the others?
After many hours, the doors to the limousine finally opened up letting in a ray of light from the sun. What happened next seemed like a blur.
Ahead of Justin stood a fleet of children, all lined up as soldiers; these were the kids from the center. They were all navigated into a secluded area where there was nothing but the desert sand, and the blazing sun.
Truly, they were in the middle of nowhere.
"What's going on?" Justin asked.
He noticed all of the kids were dressed up in black. Rifles lay in their arms; faces were painted with the symbols of war.
Miles finally spoke to his apprentice,
"What do you see here?"
Justin observed the faces of the kids in front of him.
He could see that none of them really knew why they were there. They stood like soldiers but they had no idea what they were fighting for.
"I'm not sure what I see."
An evil grin escaped Miles.
Apparently he had something planned for these kids, and it seemed that it was not for their benefit.
Then, the master spoke.
"I see the future of war standing right here… in front of us today."
Then Miles pointed off into a far off direction where the rest of the kids, about half a mile away, stood perfectly in line as chess pieces awaiting commands.
Justin remembered this exercise. At this moment in time, the good soldiers were going to be separated from the bad ones the only way it could possibly be proven, war games.
Justin had undergone this training so many times before, but this would be the first time he would stand by as an observer.
For the first time he would be able to see how dark this game really was.
Within moments after the gunshot sounded off, signifying the beginning of battle, these children became monsters. Like rabid dogs, these kids had turned vicious without knowing why, their eyes stone cold, hearts filled with anger and hate.
Once they reached their destination, they attacked each other with intensity unlike anything ever witnessed.
"Yes… I see the future of war." Miles said.
He stood there exceedingly proud of himself.
Justin was becoming increasingly horrified at the shocking events transpiring in front of his eyes.
Everything played in slow motion.
These kids were shooting at each other, beating each other down unaffected by the screams of pain around them. Each act of violence was worse than the other.
"War, just isn't the same anymore…" Miles continued,
" People refused to adapt to one set of rules. War used to exclude women and children and it used to be settled outside of cities harboring citizens but… war just isn't the same anymore… it's about creating new ways to surprise the enemy, surprise the world. You can only create so many advanced weapons until it's time to reinvent the strategy all over again."
Justin looked at his master,
"So what's the strategy now?"
The unsure apprentice was beginning to realize the level of insanity it would take to understand this man who claimed to be a savior to this world.
"Children are considered the last bit of hope left in this world, the last source of true innocence… that is a universal belief. What if we were to take that one belief, and throw it back into the faces of our oppressors?"
Many children had fallen to the ground terribly wounded, emotionally some cried for help, but there was nobody to hear that cry… they didn't know who to cry to, they neither yelled for mommy or daddy because the concept was foreign to them.
"Victory can be found once you take the most precious things life has to offer, and use these elements against the very creatures that cherish them. It's unexpected, it's illogical, and it is a powerful statement to the enemy that nothing is sacred, or untouchable. This is the future of war…"
Justin listened to each and every word that was being said.
It had become so obvious to him as he stood there, watching his brothers in arms destroy each other that these words spoken were nothing short of the truth.
It had become so obvious to Justin that these words spoken came from an illustrious dream of a terrorist, drunken with absolute power.
The fighting continued endlessly until one by one the children fell down wounded with battle scars. Finally a victor emerged out of the battle.
Although this was to be expected, Justin was emotionally disturbed once he observed the face of the remaining soldier. He could see in the boy's aimless stare that he was lost somehow…
The one child that remained standing roamed about without a destination.
With nobody left to fight, he could no longer understand his purpose, and what was he supposed to do now that everything had been destroyed?
It was a sad example of how much humanity had crumbled.
Justin could see this now…
Although the battle was a test, and the bullets fired were rubber pellets, the image of hate had been brutally painted within each and every soul present on the battlefield.
Truly war was not the same…
There was so much to this life that Justin was made oblivious to. When he rode the bus that day with his twin brothers, he realized that each and every human roaming about on the streets and on the bus had a different story to tell, they had lead a different life that nobody else would be able to capture within their mind.
He felt that it would have made the world a better place if they all shared their stories…
But after watching something like this…
'Maybe some stories were never meant to be told' he thought.
'Stories are supposed to teach something… why would a story like this need to be heard?'
Justin remembered the kids at the park.
Their futures were unplanned, life belonged to them and there was nothing that was going to stand in their way.
The children enjoyed the freedom of not knowing what it was like to be a slave. Like all newborns, they were unaware of how truly evil the world could be.
Justin could feel another dream slip away from his subconscious.
First the loss of a family that would never come to love him, and the one dream he never spoke of to anybody else.
It was the same dream he reminisced of in the park.
The same dream that involved a peaceful surrounding with nothing but a field of grass, when it wouldn't matter what happened anywhere else.
The dream was becoming more distant… but it was still there. Justin would continue to hold on to that dream for as long as he could.
A pair of hands surrounded Justin's shoulders.
"Your training is finally complete soldier… It's time to join your real family once again. Forget the past… forget the dream, for you are my son now, and I can promise you a glorious future. "
A reluctant smile came over Justin.
He acknowledged his commanders words, and once again he realized that this nightmare would probably never end.
As he climbed back into the limousine, he quickly looked behind him; he thought he heard a voice from far away.
Maybe it was just his imagination, but it sounded like Cody. It sounded like he was telling him something…
"Justin… where are you? Come back to us, we need you… we need you just as much as you need us."
so... tell me what you think:)