Zip and the virus
AN: I actually don't have anything to say for once
Disclaimer: C'mon people. If I owned Tomb Raider, do you think I would still be writing like this?
Zip sat staring at his computer, open mouthed. He was in the middle of playing the last level of Duke Nuekem and a pop-up 'popped-up' on the screen saying he had a virus. Him, have a virus. That was highly impossible. But true all the same. His computer had shut down in order to protect his files. But, he could fix the virus easily. It was the fact that he had been tapping away at the keyboard for hours, trying to complete the game, and now that he had finally managed to get to the last level, he felt like he had achieved something. Fat chance. A virus just had to pop up and make his computer black-out. All of his progress was lost. All of it. He would have to start all over again.
Kurtis walked into the room and Zip snapped his head up at him. "Hey...oh...shut your mouth, you could catch flies with that thing." he sat down opposite him, handing him a beer.
"My...the game...virus." he slumped back in his chair.
"I'm sorry what?"
"THE BLOODY VIRUS HAS LOST MY POINT IN THE GAME!!!"
"Woah, it's just a game. Calm down."
"I will not!"
"Shouldn't you be worrying about your computer, not the game?"
"I can fix that easily."
"So what's the problem?"
"The problem is, is that I was slaving over that game, just for all my progress to be wiped away from the face of the earth!"
"And?"
As an answer, Zip threw the game box at Kurtis and instructed him to look at the back. "Yeah, so?" Kurtis asked.
"Look at them. Why would you not want to spend hours staring at them?"
"They're computer-generated girls. They don't interest me." But, frankly, he was one to talk, seen as he was computer-generated and currently dating a computer-generated girl.
"Oh, if you say so." Zip replied, being sarcastic.
Winston entered the tech room from being in the garden, "What's up, Zippo and Kurty. What's happnin' in the coolio department?"
That man gets stranger everyday. Kurtis thought. "Erm, well, nothin' 'coolio' at the moment. And Winston, where exactly did you learn to talk like that?"
"Larson." Zip guessed.
"Woah, dude. You are like totally em, hipster in the brain department." Winston said again. Why was he suddenly talking like this? If he thought it would make him cooler, it wasn't working.
"Winston, did he tell you to talk like this or not?"
"Yes, Zippo, he didly dido did."
"My name's not Zippo."
"OK, dokey. Zipathina, if y'know, think it's erm chillin' to be called Zipathina instead of Zippo, then that's y'know happnin' with me."
"Winston, do you even know what exactly you're sayin'?" Kurtis asked, standing up.
"No."
"OK. Well, generally when people talk, they tend to know what they say, so, y'know keep talking in a language you understand."
"But, Mr Trent. My friend is from Scotland, and he uses words that I don't understand."
"Winston. That's his accent. And just because he uses different abbreviations, doesn't mean he speaks in a different language."
"If you say so. Anyway, I've got to go and be hip and I would stay and chat, my little chums, but I have a rather important date with a pillow." and then he walked upstairs.
"That man is really strange. How could he not understand a Scottish accent?"
"He's getting old, his hearing's getting strained." Zip answered, taking a sip of his beer.
"Yeah, but I dated a Scottish girl once. She used words like 'hink' and 'puss' and 'hing' and 'aye' and 'dinny' and 'nut' and 'ken' and..."
"Let me stop you there, Kurty. I'm not going threw a Scottish history lesson with you."
"If you want. I managed to translate the words though, in the end. Shame she told me to 'shut my puss because she didny want to hear any more crap coming oot ei it' and to 'stick my head up my own arse or she'll do it for me unless I'm too stupid to ken what an arse is' and then she started saying other crap I didn't pay attention to."
"Ah, you gotta love the Scots."
XXXX
Lara hit punch after punch at the punching bag. The reason she was being so forceful was because Larson's face was printed on every angel of the bag. Shame it didn't bruise or cut when you hit it. But, she couldn't really hit the real thing, so this would have to do.
Larson was in the corner of the room, inside a square sectioned off from the rest of the room. This is where he went when he had broken a rule. Alistair had told Lara to not treat him like a child, but Larson WAS a child. Maybe not physically, but definitely mentally. When he was placed in the square, he wasn't aloud out until he had spent the number of the rule worth in minuets. He had broken rule number 1 by stabbing Lara in the arm with a pencil. It wasn't the sharpest of objects, but when he had sharpened it non-stop for half an hour, it was quite sharp. And, because one minuet wasn't enough, she multiplied it by ten, so he would spend ten minuets in the square.
He was only in the section for three minuets, and was already moaning. "Lara, I didn't mean it. Let me out."
"No."
"Please."
"No."
"Please."
"Larson for god's sake-"
She was cut of by Zip's screaming "Yes, it's back on!" He had managed to fix the virus on his computer, now was the big moment- to see whether the game had saved automatically. Lara walked threw to the tech room, leaving Larson sulking in the gym.
"What's back on?"
"My computer got a virus. Now I just need to see..." he clicked a series of buttons to load up the Duke Nuekem game he had been playing. "NO!!!" he dropped to the floor and began to rock back and forth.
"What's the matter?"
"My game wasn't saved! I have to start from level 1."
"Well, was it not a bit daft to not save it after each level?"
"Shut up Croft. You're just putting me down more!"
"Zip, you seem to be forgetting who has the guns here." she picked up one of her guns from it's holsters and waved it around.
"You don't say? I hadn't noticed. Guess I was put off from all the shooting you do with them." he said. The sarcasm in his voice was like the venom in a snake. It would sink into anyone who dare get close enough.
"I can't handle this, I've got to get back to Goldilocks." she returned to the gym, leaving Zip mourning over his games death. He got back to his feet, quickly walked into the kitchen to get a cup of coffee and many high sugared sweeties and got back to his seat, before loading up the game again. He was going to get to that last level. Whether he had to spend all night doing it or fill up on high levels of caffeine to do it, he didn't care. He was going to finish that game. Even if it was the last thing he did.
XXXX
Larson was out of his cage and released in the wild. He was skipping threw the manor, heading towards the Tech room – breaking another rule. "Hey Zippo."
"It's Zipathina, and aren't you breaking a rule?" he didn't take his eyes off of the computer screen.
"Yes, but you won't notice. Your too filled up on caffeine to notice anything." he walked over to the stereo, pulling out a CD he had stolen from Kurtis' collection. So, in the matter of three minuets, he had broken three rules: Going near the Tech room, touching someone else's possessions and going into Lara and Kurtis' bedroom. But it didn't make a difference to Larson. He didn't even know why Lara went to the trouble of making the rules if Larson was only going to break them.
"Notice what? I know you're here, that's a big enough warning to stay alert." he rapidly hit the keyboard.
"True." he bent down and pulled a plug out of a socket and put the plug for the stereo in. Which, was breaking rule number 457: Don't touch any plugs.
"NOOOOO!!!" Zip screamed.
"What?" Larson was alert now.
"You." Zip said from gritted teeth. He turned around to face Larson. He looked terrible: bags under his eyes, his face flushed.
"What?" Larson asked again as Zip started to walk towards him.
Larson backed up and Lara came running in from the kitchen. "What is it?"
"He pulled the plug on my computer!"
"So, Larson, how many rules have you broken in the last five minuets?" she asked Larson. She turned to Zip, "And? It will just start up and resume."
"No, Lara. That's what happens when the battery of a laptop dies. HE PULLED THE PLUG! ALL OF MY PROGRESS IS LOST!!!"
"For the last time Zip, SAVE THE GAME!" Lara had had enough.
AN: I'm not sire when I'll next update – I'm going on a short holiday, and I'll probably not have internet access, but I'll try to update either Monday or Tuesday, but I'm not promising anything.
Nikita