AN: Um...hey, remember me? Probably not...*clears throat* I'm that fanfic author that used to write a bunch of crap, and then said she would update one day, and then didn't (because of good reasons, but other were just plain being lazy), and then vanished off the face of the Earth. HA! I saw that lightbulb spark above your head! NOW you remember me! Or maybe not? Oh, well.
Okay, so, I'm not going to give you reasons other than this about why I've suddenly disappeared: I wrote about ¼ of my chapter, and then *plop* in comes Christmas. This involved a hell of a lot of visiting family (as everyone probably does during Christmas), and then I went on a ski trip with the freshmans, sophmores, and juniors of my school to Maine (and I obviously didn't have my laptop with me). Then it was my birthday, and then...well...I DID write a couple of, well, to be blunt, paragraphs when I had a chance to, but then everyone else's birthday's kept rolling in, which meant shopping, and then doing something on their birthday's. And then I had to make course choices for my third year in high school, and then...well. That's when the writer's block REALLY came in. But as me and my friend discussed the other day while walking to school, there's only a small difference between writer's block and not being arsed.
Now, that TRULY INSPIRING story made me think, 'I want to kick my not-being-arsed ass!' and that I did...well, almost, my other story is still on hiatus. And this is also for a friend's birthday. But, since she is one of my greatest best friends, but lives all the way across the Atlantic, I can save some money and write a chapter dedicated to her! (another one!)
Well, on with it, then!
(Shout out to the birthday girl; trjunepearl, Alice XD SURPRISE ATTACK!)
Disclaimer: I own nobody in this chapter...apart from me. The Tomb Raider characters in this chapter belong solely to Eidos Interactive/Square Enix/Core Design/Crystal Dynamics. I own myself (the character Nikita), but I don't own the character Amy (the friend with whom I shared an epiphany), Alice (b-day girl, or trjunepearl), or Corey (a boy I semi-know). The latter three all belong to themselves :P
Enough of my crap, on with the story!
"Yes, of course there's room."
As Alister walked down the stairs, he spotted a grim-looking Lara standing near the coffee table, telephone in hand. He stopped mid-stride, leaning against the banister as he listened into her conversation (which he might possibly get a slap for, but, hey, who cared?).
"Well...I don't know. It would be fantastic to see you...yes, there is room, like I said. But it's a bit short notice, isn't it?" Lara sighed at the answer on the other end. "Fine. Seeing as you're in the country already, I suppose you best come. Saves you from detouring to Blackpool or Haggerston." She sighed once more, and placed the phone down.
"What's wrong with Blackpool or Haggerston?" Alister asked, continuing down the stairs.
"You were listening in?" Lara asked. She sat – or rather fell – down on the sofa.
"Yeah, what's wrong with them places?" Larson asked. He had been watching from the top of the stairs.
"You, too?" Lara sighed. "An old friend of mine's daughter is coming to visit. Apparently it's her friend's birthday, and she's always dreamed of meeting me. She's bringing a small entourage with her. To be precise, it'll be teenage central for the next two days. Two thirteen year old girls, a fifteen year-old boy, and a fourteen year-old girl. Not to mention, a few other people might find out and tag along."
"I've never been to Blackpool." Larson said.
"Nice to know you care, Larson." Lara said.
"I'm sure it can't be that bad. Is this little Nikita we're talking about?" Alister joined Lara on the couch.
"Yes, but I'm not sure she's so "little" any more. Count in a growth spurt, a few years too intelligent for her own good, and a whole interest swap. She's still the smart, funny girl we know, just a few years older. That's what I'm worried about."
"I'm sure you can handle a few teenagers, Lara." Alister chuckled. "Besisdes, you deal with us every day. We're worse."
"What's Blackpool like?" Larson groaned from the top of the stairs.
"GO GOOGLE IT!" Lara shouted. Her reply was a wide-eyed Larson, staring down at her like she was the devil himself. Speaking of the devil, he wondered where Angel was.
Lara calmed herself down. "I'm not worried about having to look after them, it's just...well. I'm not sure if I can handle more children."
"You'll be fine; you always are." Alister said.
"I. Want. To. Go. To. Blackpool." Larson said through gritted teeth.
"Well, go the hell to Blackpool, then! Go to Timbuktu for all I care!"
"That's a real place?" Larson asked. "Funny, I thought that's what people always said when they wanted rid of you." He laughed quietly to himself. "So, we're having guests?"
A sudden thought occurred to Lara at this point. "Oh, God. Alister, get him locked up in the basement, and DO NOT let him out whatsoever while these kids are here! Nikita will leave with one ear, Corey will be gay, Amy will be demented, and Alice might just end up bald. I'm serious. This man is as crazy as it gets, and I don't want these children to leave with mental problems after meeting him."
Larson's mouth dropped open, "EXCUSE ME?"
"That's a bit far-fetched, Lara, is it not?" Alister asked. He was met with a look that said 'Does it look like I'm kidding?'. "In fact, you're right. Larson, you're either on your best behaviour, or it's down to the basement."
Larson had been walking down the stairs throughout the conversation. He was now opposite Lara and Alister, and he sat down on the couch slowly. "But there's spider's in there." he whispered. He looked genuinely terrified.
"It's either that or you behave."
"Will do, Pipsqueak."
Alister cleared his throat. "Enough of that name, Larson. We have enough trouble with over-aged children acting like idiots in this house already; we don't need you to turn these possibly-mature teens-" Larson stifled a laugh at this "- into...well, people like yourself, Kurtis, or Zip."
As if on cue, the doors to the front of the manor burst open. A red water balloon came flying at Lara, and hit her square on the face. Screaming laughter came from outside, and Kurtis sprinted into the main hall, Zip following him. They were both carrying water balloons. "KURTIS!" Lara shouted.
"Oh-em-gee, colours!" Larson screamed. He caught Lara's glare and his smile faded away.
Kurtis stopped running, and his smile faded. Lara opened her arms, and Kurtis grinned, throwing a balloon her way. She caught it easily, and threw it at Zip. "Damn, girl, you've got good aim." Zip said, shaking his wet head.
"What, are you a dog or something? Don't ring your head out on me, dude!" Kurtis shouted.
"I want a cat called Persia." Larson sighed.
They all stared at him.
"And I think I've got hydroplocoasus."
"What the hell is hydroploco-whatchamacallit?" Kurtis asked.
"A disease that decreases the rate in which the brain processes things." Alister put in.
"Oh. Well, that would explain a lot of things." Lara said. She walked over to Kurtis, plucked another balloon out of his hand, and threw it over her head. It landed right on Larson's head. A few seconds later, it seemed to dawn on him what happened. "Hey!" he shouted.
"Point proved." Kurtis said.
"I'll be upstairs, if you need me. Staring at Jared and Alex." Larson sighed blissfully. He started up the stairs.
"I should put in that's Padelecki and Pettyfer." Zip said.
"He's got posters of Jared Padelecki and Alex Pettyfer?" Kurtis asked.
"Who can blame him?" Alister and Lara said in unison.
Kurtis cleared his throat, and put on a fake girl accent – an epic fail. "Girl, when you got brute force like you do, with a body like that, who needs those hotties? You got one on your doorstep. It's like having Brad Pitt waiting for you in bed every night. With twice the amount of stamina."
Zip laughed and patted Kurtis on the back. "Don't be too kind on yourself, man. Don't over-exaggerate, either."
"Zip, dude, admit it. You want me." Kurtis smirked.
"Erm, no, I don't, dude."
Kurtis did a small twirl, "I ain't no delicate little flower, but I'm a mind reader, remember? I know you'd change your type for me. I mean, who can blame you?"
"Now you just sound like a whore. I'd stop if I were you."
"No, no, this is getting interesting. Keep going, Kurtis." Lara smiled.
"You both want me. You would so tap this."
Alister laughed. "No offence, Kurtis, but you don't do it for me. Maybe Zip and Lara, but not me."
Zip scoffed. "Al, this man is standing here trying to convince me to turn gay for him, with his girl standing right there. What is it that doesn't do it for you, again?"
"Thinks he's attractive, not a lot going on upstairs. You're not as bad as Larson, though."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'm no psychopathic ditz, but I'm not exactly Steven Hawkings. You needed some brute force for a change, and I stuck."
Lara walked up to him, and patted him on the cheek. "You just remember that."
"Yeah, sorry, guys. But my glorious body belongs to the one and only Lady Croft." he put his arm around Lara's shoulders.
"Just not tonight."
"Oh, Jared, you shouldn't have!" they heard Larson shout from upstairs.
"Should we tell him that Mr. Padelecki is half way across the world, and...erm, couldn't have done anything?" Alister asked.
"Nah, let's just let him live in the moment." Zip laughed, throwing himself down on the sofa.
"This is getting rather disturbing. This whole day, in fact." Lara sighed.
"It's about to get worse. I just heard a car pull up outside." Alister said.
"Who's coming, like? More men for Kurtis to turn gay?" Zip put in.
"Ha ha, very funny." Kurtis said, sitting down beside Zip on the couch.
"Too close, dude."
"Is that a gun I see, Mr...what the hell is your surname? Barcode?"
"For you, beautiful, it can be Rub-Someone-Else-Up."
"ALEX, COME AND MEET LARA AND KURTIS!" Larson screamed.
"HE DOESN'T KNOW YOU, LARSON!" Lara shouted back up.
Kurtis squealed and jumped to his feet, "Oh, Zip, please, we're with company."
"Shut up, dude, or that face of yours won't be so pretty within the next twenty seconds."
"You know where to come at night..."
"That is just too far, Kurtis. I sleep in that room, too, remember." Lara chuckled.
Kurtis did a small dance...(quite disturbing, Lara thought). "It's not my fault that everyone wants a bit of the K-man..."
"Oh, for f-"
"Um, Lara? Are we interrupting something?" Lara heard a young girls voice coming from the open doorway of the manor. She turned around, and spotted the one person she recognised out of the crowd of teenagers.
"Nikita! You're a bit early, are you not?" she walked up to the girl – Nikita – and hugged her. The embrace was immediately returned, and Lara stepped back to survey how much the girl had changed...which, she realised, was a lot. She was wearing a Converse top with 'Make Noise' printed in big lettering just above the chest of the top, with a blue tartan shirt buttoned up, with a few buttons left loose to make out the top underneath. She was also wearing dark blue skinny jeans, with black Converse hi' tops on top of them, and finally a brown leather jacket over her shoulders. It looked like she had black hair, but if Lara squinted in the light, she could see the true brunette she was. But she wouldn't dare imply that she had black hair...she knew from experience that Nikita hated that. But, that girl had changed.
"Well, we were already here, and met Alice at Gatwick. It wasn't that long to get here from there, and we were practically five blocks away when I phoned..." Nikita smiled up at Lara.
Lara sighed, but returned the gesture. She motioned towards the other three teens in the room. "Well, aren't you going to introduce us?"
"Oh, right, sorry." Nikita motioned to her right, where a girl about an inch smaller stood beside her. She was a red-head, with blonde highlights. Lara instantly felt sorry for the girl. "This is Amy." Amy was wearing a purple Fall Out Boy t-shirt, grey skinny jeans, and blue low top Converses on her feet. Another leather jacket – except this was black – covered her shoulders. A red tartan shirt was unbuttoned on top of the band tee. Lara greeted her, and looked at the boy on Nikita's left.
"This is Corey." Lara noticed how Nikita seemed to flush when she said the boys name...she also noticed how he smiled at Nikita when she introduced him. She made a mental note to dig into it later. Hey, maybe that's a new career choice. Lara Croft – Dating Extrordinare. Although, it wouldn't go so good on her reputation if she had "Boyfriend tries to convince other men to turn gay for him, when he is utterly straight." scrawled on a list of experiences. Hmm, maybe not such a great occupation. She brought her mind back to the present, and looked at Corey. He was remarkably taller than the three girls, maybe even taller than Zip or Kurtis. He had light brown hair, in a somewhat Emo haircut. It was swept to the side, and came down to just below his ears. He was wearing a plain red t-shirt, with 'You Me At Six' printed on the bottom left hand corner. He was wearing "normal" jeans, put with a third pair of Converses hidden beneath them. These were also black. He looked older than the girls, maybe fifteen at the most.
"And, finally, Alice. The birthday girl." Nikita smiled, and pointed to the tall, leggy girl on the other side of Amy. All of them were leggy, Lara noticed then. Not exactly giants, but a decent height for their age – especially Corey.
Alice was wearing a dark red and white stripy tank top, that had 'Punk' written on one of the lines. Instead of jeans, like the other kids, she was wearing black combat trousers, with biker boots on underneath. Like Corey, she had light brown hair, but auburn highlights ran through her long hair. At this point, Lara realised that all the girls that long hair; Amy had her's tied up, but it still managed to reach her waist. Alice and Nikita had shorter hair, but it was still long. And Lara realised that all the girls had a lot going for them in the "looks department". Corey and Alice had full lips – like herself – but Lara found that Amy and Nikita were still incredibly pretty, like Alice. Corey could be like a junior Kurtis...or, to rub it in, a junior Jared Padelecki or Alex Pettyfer. She couldn't see these girls needing a lot of make-up.
"Nice to meet you all." she smiled, and ushered them into the living room. "Where's Winston?" she asked the room.
"He's outside," Zip said, "He was playing with Kurtis and me, except we had a little bet, and he lost..." he smirked.
"Is HE that guy tied up to that tree?" Corey asked. "'Cause, and no offence, but I think you need a butler in better shape."
"You were PLAYING with him and TIED HIM TO A TREE?" Lara shouted.
Kurtis laughed, "It's his own fault."
"I'm not even going to ask what you bet." Lara muttered under her breath.
"Wow, who the hell are you?" Kurtis asked the teens behind Lara.
"Excuse me?" Amy asked.
"My God, Lara, did you bring the Village Of The Damned with you?" Alister chuckled.
"I'm going to pretend we didn't hear that." Nikita said.
"WAIT FOR ME!" The room turned around as a fourth girl, and an incredibly tall boy ran into the room. They were both blonde, and seemed to brighten the group up. "Oh, this is Shannon and Dale." Nikita said. The girl – Shannon – was wearing light blue jeans, with a pink Henley's jacket zipped up to the top, covering an unseen top. She was wearing grey plimsolls on her feet. The boy, Dale, was also wearing light blue jeans, with a plain green top, and grey plimsolls.
"I take it you two are the lively people of the group?"
"Oh, no. This is the village idiot, and our BFG."
"Dale's as friendly as you can get...Shannon's as insane as you can get." Amy said.
"I highly doubt it." Lara said. "Speaking of narcissistic psychopathic idiots, where's Larson?"
"He ran outside with 'Jared and Alex' while you were talking to the kids. And, Zip violated me." Kurtis whispered.
"Oh, c'mon, man, there's kids here!" Zip shouted.
"Can we just get the party, started, please? Not to be rude, but we're a tad jetlagged." Corey said.
"AMY!" Shannon shouted. They all turned to look at her. "You got a bottle? I need a drink."
"There's a kitchen right through there, Shannon."
"Oh, never mind." They noticed how she suddenly started gasping for air.
"What the hell are you doing?" Alice asked. It was the first time she had spoken. She had an American accent, whereas the rest of them all had Scots accents.
"I thought I was dying – false alarm." Shannon sighed as she marched – literally marched – to the sofa, before sitting down beside Kurtis.
"I don't feel safe next to her." he said, getting up and sitting on the opposite couch.
"What about this party?" Nikita held up an ASDA bag, with a Bonkers bag in the other hand. "We brought the supplies, so, basically, you only have to supply the venue. And, it's Alice's first day as a proper teen. It only makes sense to celebrate. And, she's like, your biggest fan...joint with me, of course." she smiled.
"Oh, okay, fine. Get Larson in here." Lara said.
"Are you sure that's the best idea?" Kurtis asked. "It's just, this kid here seems pretty crazy, and we might not want to torment these kids when they're so young."
"Don't worry about crap like that. We'll be fine. If you went to our schools, you would understand." Dale said. He had a sweet voice...sort of like Alister's, but with less Cockney and more Scottish.
Larson came running through the doors of the manor just then, with Jared Padelecki and Alex Pettyfer running behind him. Not the posters; the real people. Everybody stared in awe. "Is that...?" Nikita asked.
"I think it is..." Amy said.
The pairs mouths had dropped open, and Corey looked slightly jealous.
"JARED, ALEX! YOU GOT THE NEWS!" Shannon jumped to her feet. The rest of the people in the room turned to look at her now.
"YOU organised this?" Corey asked.
"Hell yes. I wanted the best for Alice."
"I'm not complaining." Alice laughed.
"I am." Corey scowled. Nikita looked over at him, and Lara saw his expression soften into a smile. She returned the gesture – blushing again – and looked at the two stars in front her.
"Well, Kurtis." Zip said. "Seeing you all in a room together – I'd pick Jared. Sorry, man."
AN: I should also say that I don't own Jared Padelecki or Alex Pettyfer, and I don't own Shannon (who is actually pretty insane in real life. She marches down the corridor all the time. It's pretty scary as to what her unknown imput to Larson's character in this is) and Dale (who is literally like the Big Friendly Giant).
I'm sorry if this didn't fit up to your expectations, but I just wrote this for Alice's birthday. I hadn't been planning to write it, but I had to give her SOMETHING for her birthday!
So, Happy Birthday Alice!
Niki x
*Oh, and hydroplocoasus isn't a real disease. It's something my friend – yes, seeing as you're asking, it WAS Shannon – made up when she was a "doctor". My friend Amy got a big cut one day, and "Doctor" Shannon "stitched" it up, so I asked her if I had a diagnosis, and she gave me hydroplocoasus...but apparently I'm cured now.