A/N: Just played Baseball in PE - Living the dream! All we needed was the outfits and thunder:)

Most of the songs are by Diana Vickers (well, the chapters are named after her songs)

'I feel numb
My every nerve has lost it's feeling
No air left in my lungs
A gasp of breath is all I'm craving

It's the opposite of love
All things decay and rust
It's the ugly side of us
Oh mother hold me'

-N.U.M.B, Diana Vickers-

Chapter Two - N.U.M.B

Edward didn't go into school the next day, in fact he didn't even speak to me on the way home from his house after the party. I didn't know what he was afraid of, I wasn't mad at Jasper for what he did, I understood it, it was my own fault.

But it was good he wasn't coming over in a way. I wouldn't want him to see me throwing up because of some stomach bug I'd caught. He'd just worry anyway.

One morning, I woke up to nausea immediately and sprinted to the bathroom, ignoring Charlie. I managed to lift my hair out of the way before I threw up violently. I heard Charlie knocking on the door,

"Bells? Bella?" He asked.

"Huh--" I threw up again, coughing too.

When I'd finally done, I washed my mouth out and unlocked the door for Charlie.

"You okay Bells?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine just a stomach bug or something."

"Are you well enough for school?" He asked.

"Yes, I'm fine." I said through my teeth, and then pushing past him to get to my room, slamming the door.

I lifted my pajama shirt off, only to notice a very distinctly but clear bump on my abdomen. I stared at it in the mirror, and then looked down at it, it was barely visible, but it was there.

I knew what it could be, but I didn't want to say it, let alone think it. But it was possible, me being pregnant.

I put my hand on it, just as I heard Edward's car pull up. I sighed and rushed to get dressed. I raced downstairs and answered the door, he looked... different. Not physically different, just different.

I smiled and put on a brave face, "Hi Edward, you--" He looked down. "Edward?"

"Come with me," He said quietly.

"Where?"

"The forest." He turned and walked towards the forest, I just followed him.

We were quite deep in the forest, when Edward turned around to speak. I knew this was the right time to tell him I could be pregnant. "Well?"

"We're leaving." My heart sank.

"Leaving? But... you can't, you--" I shook my head, I was speechless.

"I'm sorry." He said, "My family and myself."

"Why?" I whispered. "Is it because of what happened with Jasper? That was nothing!"

"Not just that - before your party, after we slept together, those bruise, what I did to you, I hurt you, Bella."

"That doesn't matter! Please!"

"I'm sorry." He repeated, kissing my forehead and walking away, but eventually he was out of view.

It was after that I felt a light flutter in my stomach. The tears began immediately as I fell to my knees. "Edward... I'm pregnant." I cried. He would never know. He'll never know his child exists.

I curled up, still crying, and put my hands on my stomach. He was gone. He was gone and I was carrying his child, his vampire child. What did that mean? I had no idea what to expect, I needed him.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x

I found myself walking back to my house - where I got the will to do that I had no idea. My hands were wrapped around me, I kept feeling the... baby kick every so often. I knew that wasn't supposed to happen until after a few months.

"Your Daddy's gone, baby." I said, rubbing my stomach with tears streaming down my face. "I'm sorry."

"Bella?" My hand dropped as I looked up and saw Charlie. "Where the hell have you been? The school called and said you never showed up." He said angrily.

I sniffed, "He's gone."

"What?"

"Edward's gone, they've all gone." I said, holding back the tears.

He sighed, "Oh Bella." He opened his arms for me, I shook my head.

"No, I... I need some time alone." I whispered, heading inside to my room.

When the door shut, I started crying, uncontrollably, more than I did in the forest. My hands automatically fell to my stomach, rubbing it. I looked up, and decided to stop crying. Crying wouldn't bring him back. I wiped my eyes and went to my mirror, and examined the small bump.

It was definitely a baby bump, I'd established that earlier. I has so many questions, would the baby be a vampire? Would I become a vampire? Or worst of all - would I die? Would my baby grow up without a Mother or a Father?

But I knew one thing was certain - I couldn't stay in Forks. No way, in case I did die or if I became a vampire I'd put everyone I know in danger. I pulled out my suitcase, and threw all my clothes in - not that they'd fit me soon anyway - and a few pictures, one of Charlie, one of Jacob, one with Eric, Jessica, Mike and Angela on it an finally one of the Cullens.

I sighed and began writing a note for Charlie,

Dad,

I'm sorry you have to read this, but I had to leave, I can't tell you why or where I'm going. Just promise you won't come looking for me, don't worry about me and tell Mom not to worry about me either. I'll be fine.

All my love, Bella x

I placed the note on my pillow, and carried the case downstairs, luckily Charlie wasn't here so I skipped the awful goodbye. I put the suitcase in the passenger seat of my truck, and set off driving.

I had no idea where I was going to go. I had no plan.

I couldn't be anywhere near Phoenix or Forks that was for sure. After I reached the highway, I kept looking at the signs, and finally came to a desision - Montana. Not to close to Forks nor Arizona. Perfect.

I knew it would be a long drive, so I stopped at a gas station to fill up, and get some food to satisfy food cravings. I walked in, and felt a cold sweat wash over me, I ran towards to bathroom, throwing up immediately.

I exited the bathroom, denying a few looks from the people in the room. I picked up a few things I fancied, and went to pay, the clerk looked surprised,

"That's alot of food for one lady." He commented.

"Uh, yeah." I said, handing him the money.

I saw him notice my bump, "Oh, I see, congratulations." He smiled.

"Thanks." I said, before turning around and heading for my truck.

I put the food in my bag, and turned the engine on. I jumped when I felt a small nudge from my stomach, my hand dropped to the spot, just as I felt it again.

I smiled.

I wanted to end it with "I smiled" because she hasn't smiled ever since Edward left her -- :'(

Playlist so far:

N.U.M.B - Diana Vickers
The Boy Who Murdered Love - Diana Vickers
Back For Good - Take That

So, review? xx