The Cullens introduce: what to do on a boring day
A.N- I do not own twilight or any of its characters. Stephenie Meyer does.
By: Crazy-dreamz:)
Edward POV:
I followed Bella into the bathroom with the rest of my family snickering behind me. I truly believe that Emmett or Alice put some cough medicine or happy pills in that candy because my sweet, innocent, caring Bella would never do this to me unless she was under some sort of medication….but either way I know there is no way of getting out of this non-dare as my CDs are at risk.
Bella lead me right up to the toilet and smirked.
"Now, do you know what you have to do my dear Eddie-corn?" her sweet voice masking her evil plot.
"I have to dunk my head in the water, drink some water and then sing Mary had a little lamb." I said in a flat voice.
"Good dog." Rosalie said patting my head. I snarled.
"Bad dog!" Rosalie scolded me as if I was a dog.
"Listen dog-breath, at least I don't smell like dog-food." I yelled
"YOU'RE THE ONE DRINKING TOILET WATER AND SINGING A NURSERY RYME!" she shouted, eyes blazing.
"Whoa, people! Calm down! Let's get on with the germification dare." Alice said
"It's not technically a dare; it's just to make Edward gain my forgiveness." Bella stated.
"And my CDs…" I muttered. Bella glared at me which made me zip it. I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE GLARED AT ME!
"WHERE HAS OUR LOVE GONE?" I shouted at no-one in particular.
"It's been flushed down the toilet, Edward. If you want it back, you have to search for it." Bella said in a fake-sad voice.
"DAMN YOU ARTIFICIAL SUGAR!" I shouted at the ceiling.
"Listen, Edward. Stop being a drama queen and stick your head in the toilet." Alice said. Emmett laughed. I sighed and looked down at the toilet in disgust.
The things I do for my CDs….
I kneeled down, braced myself against the bowl and started to bend my head. I really must have no soul…..
"GIVE ME AN E!" Emmett shouted
"E!" everyone shouted back.
Oh, for the love that is all holy…
"GIVE ME A D!"
"D!"
"Shut the hell up!" I said in a sing-song voice.
They ignored me.
"GIVE ME A W!"
"W!"
"Can't you see I'm already dying in disgust here, I don't need a pep rally thank you very much?" I said in annoyance
"GIVE ME an A!"
"A!"
"ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?" I yelled
"GIVE ME A…..AHHH……" Emmett trailed off.
"Can't you spell 'Edward', Emmett?" Jasper asked in a steady voice.
"OF COURSE I CAN!" He shouted
"IT'S E, D, W, A……..something…….D! He tried to spell out my name.
"Well, it doesn't really surprise me as he has an IQ of a turnip." I wryly said
Everyone else started to laugh loudly. Emmett looked like he was going to cry...if he could.
"YOU PEOPLE HAVE NO FEELINGS! MOST PEOPLE ARE BORN WITH THEM BUT YOU GUYS OBVIOUSLY WEREN'T! GO BUY THEM ON EBAY!" He shouted.
We all stared at him blankly.
"I'M NOW GOING TO GO EAT A FEW TUBS OF ICE-CREAM, WATCH A FEW CHICK-FLICKS, BAWL MY EYES OUT AND THEN PAINT MY NAILS!" Emmett shouted.
We still all stared at him blankly.
"Emmett, you can't actually eat anything….." Jasper pointed out.
He then ran into his and Rosalie's room and seemed to be raiding through her wardrobe……YES! An escape route….
"Do you go want to check on him? He might dress up in Rosalie's Cheerleader Halloween costume and dance along to the Barbie girl song…" I trailed off innocently. I am a master of innocence.
"Excuse me Edward, darling, I do believe you are trying to stall or even worse….make me forget what you need to do right now." She accused.
"What, me?" I asked with wide eyes while pointing to my chest.
"Listen Edwina; DUNK YOUR HEAD INTO THE TOILET BOWL RIGHT NOW!" Alice screeched.
I sighed and slowly lowered my head into the bowl of water. I can't believe I'm doing this….
I quickly dunked my whole head in. I decided to make everybody cringe, I might as well…
I cupped my hands and filled them with toilet water. I looked at all of them in the eyes and made loud slurping sounds.
I choked and sputtered….
"THIS IS UNBELIEVLY AND ABSURDLY THE MOST DISGUISTING THING I HAVE DONE! I LOOK LIKE THOSE DOGS IN THOSE CARTOONS!" I yelled to no-one in particular.
"Now sing the song." Bella said expectedly.
Sigh….
"Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb. Mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow." I sang.
"Now a rap version!" said Emmett excitedly as he unexpectedly popped through the door.
"MARY HAD A LIL' LAMB IT'S FLEECE WAZ WHITE AS SNOW." I sang a bit louder.
"Now a pop version!" Alice said happily.
"Oh noo, I'm getting out of here." I said as I dashed out of the room.
I will never get sucked into that again….
Tell me what you think :)