A/N: So yeah, i ahve a hard time right now. there's been a few things messing up my life. gonna update this and then we'll see! I'm just not .. in the mood for writing atm!
"Iz, what?" Alex was in shock. He was standing outside the elevators.
Meredith walked up behind him as she came out from the elevator, she slapped his shoulder and he jumped up in shock.
"Stop it" He whispered to Mer.. as he listened to Iz.
"You're PREGNANT? WHAT THE HELL IZ?" He suddenly screamed right out in the hospital.
Mers eyes widened as Alex hung up.
"You're having a kid?" She smirked
"No, I'm having TWO kids. Twins, a boy and a girl.. Emily and Philip" Alex sighed.. "And they got to live with me cause Iz can't handle them.. They're only like a month old" His voice dropped and he sighed.
Mer starred at him.
"Are you kidding me? You get two kids with your ex-wife and I..." She cut off as she noticed Derek walking towards them with a cup of coffee and her purse in the other hand.
"I thought you needed this.." He smiled and reached her the purse.
"What.. You're not back to work yet? They're still clearing us all for surgery and stuff aren't they? And there are no incoming traumas yet, even though it's been, almost two months"
Derek looked at her.
"Two months, only? I got to run.. When are you done?" He mumbled quickly.
"I've got counseling until 1 pm and then I just have to help Alex with a thing, so like.. 3?" Mer shrugged and looked at Derek as he nodded and hurried away. She looked at Alex and they both started to laugh.
"That was, odd" Alex coughed and tried to act like he didn't understand.
Hope I bump into Mark, dude.. He needs help with that wedding. Alex thought for himself.
"Mer, I call you later about Iz and the kids and that. Okay?" He gave her a shy grin in compassion.
"Yeah, and we need to discuss.. April Kepner.. Dude" Mer laughed at him before she headed of to the elevators.
She entered the office of the therapist Andrew Perkins and looked at him as she sat down.
"Hey, I'm here… " She sighed loudly.
"Hey, you don't want to do this anymore right?" He blinked at her.
"Nah, I'm fine..." She smiled at him, he was a nice guy. He understood her and she knew it.
"Yeah, well.. Let's see. We have been working on, Derek on the catwalk. On there, have you crossed the Catwalk since then?" He tilted his head and made a face looking like a begging puppy that made Mer burst out in a laughter.
"Yes, or, I haven't crossed it, but I did walk out on it the other day" She assured him. "Cristina was there with me"
"Good, that's progress.. Though you know you need to pass that catwalk Meredith" He looked into her eyes and noticed her backing down with her look.
"I'll do it with Derek, he's the one that can make me to do it" She shuddered.
"Yeah, that's good, set a goal. Then, we're going to take the OR. After you offered your life for Dereks. Does he know that you did that is the first thing?"
"Yeah, we talked about it another day, at home" She whispered.
She sat in the sofa, Derek was in the kitchen getting them each a cup of coffee.
"Here sweetheart" He smiled.. "You look like you need some sleep, do you sleep at night?"
"Barely, I keep having nightmares, about Gary Clark" She whispered as she closed her eyes.
"Tell me what happened, in the O.R until Owen got shot. Please Mer?"
She looked at him, how could she out hold the details now, but then she smiled.
"I sat in the scrub room, with April. Owen walked in and he never scrubbed in so suddenly I realized there was something wrong. I walked in to the OR and when I enter the doors I saw Gary, holding a gun to Cristinas head, and she keeps operating. That was terrifying for her, for me, for Owen, for Jackson and Bokey. Well I told him to shoot me, since… he wanted an Eye for an eye." She looked at Derek again who gasped and starred at her.
"Then he pointed his gun at me, and… Cristina said he couldn't shoot me and Owen jumped at him and he shot him in the shoulder. And Jackson unplugged you.." She whispered the last thing.
Dr. Perkins looked at her as she wiped away the tears now streaming down her face.
"Well, that's progress.. Then I need you to tell me what happened there to.. We can go as far as until Owen got shot."
Mer gave him a shocked gaze and opened her mouth. She choked before she wet her lips and took a deep breath.
"I sat in the scrub room, with April. Owen walked in and he never scrubbed in so suddenly I realized there was something wrong. I walked in to the OR and when I enter the doors I saw Gary, holding a gun to Cristinas head, and she keeps operating. That was terrifying for her, for me, for Owen, for Jackson and Bokey. Well I told him to shoot me, since… he wanted an Eye for an eye and he pointed his gun at me, when Cris said I was pregnant and he couldn't shoot me and then Owen jumped against him and he shot him"
She looked at him, a cold iced look before she nodded.
"Great Mer, how.. have you walked into an OR yet? Have you looked up yourself after this?"
"Yeah, I was in the OR yesterday, we made an appendectomy and I did. I did like a few weeks ago."
She breathed out and pulled her hand through her hair.
"Well, then.. You make progress.. How do you feel about everything now?"
"You mean the fact that I lost my baby, I haven't told my husband about that and I can't do anything cause everyone in this stupid hospital gets a kid now? Did you know, my friend Izzie, she had cancer.. they took out her healthy eggs and now she was pregnant with twins, and my friend Alex is going to have to take care of them. And the fact that I'm supposed to get married, in a big white dress, in a church but my husband doesn't talk about it, so I don't think we ever will. The fact that I want a kid so badly, but I'm too scared to mention it to Derek, and even more scared about mention the miscarriage. Yeah.. I feel great" Mer snapped, and rolled her eyes. "Sorry, it's a little too much and my mom, my dead mom, is probably proud of me and I need her to tell me. And I want Dereks mom back, cause she's so nice. And his sisters knows I lost our baby, but we all agreed on not telling him, cause yeah.. He was injured"
"Mer , you look.. bad.. Sorry" Kathleen dragged her out of Dereks room with the other three sisters following.
"I'm fine, okay?" She sighed and shook her head at them.
"No, you use the word fine so much, it makes no sense." Nancy scoffed at her "Speak up woman"
Amelia and Julie had just starred at her as she itched the back of her arm and sighed.
"We… I.. I was pregnant" She mumbled quietly.
"But that's great sis" Kathleen had smiled at her.
"WAS" Mer marked out to her before she felt eight eyes widened and four loud gasps.
"Oh my.. " Amelia said before she hugged Mer tight. "I'm so sorry Mer… I really am"
"Does..:" Julie asked quietly.
"No, he doesn't.. He's not in the best shape now"
"You're right." Kathleen and Nancy agreed.
"And I'm happy if we don't talk about it, it's kind of hard to deal with you know.. " Mer wiped her eyes quickly.
All four sisters smiled at her..
"Sure" They whispered before they pulled her into a big hug.
Mer smiled at Andrew Perkins.
"Well Meredith, you made good progress.. We'll meet again in, three days?"
She nodded at him. "Sounds perfect" Andrew was something else than , he understood, he cared and he wanted to help her.. She sighed when she opened the door, it was 1.30 and she didn't really want to go home, Derek always wanted to know what they talked about and it was hard to keep out the details about everything. She sighed as she walked into Alex.
"You okay Mer?" He looked furious but he sounded
"yeah, just trying to figure out how to avoid Derek, I don't want to.. talk" she whispered.
"Well, let's head to.." Alex trailed of as his pager went off.
"You don't work?" Mer eyed him.
"Nah, it's Izzie.. I think it's about the kids… " He agonized for the call.
Mer rolled her eyes and nodded quick before she went down, the lobby was empty and she looked up at the catwalk.
"Tomorrow maybe" She whispered to herself before she walked out through the doors and headed back to her home.
R&R right?
So, just for preparation for next chapter there's gonna be a timejump,. i have a specfic time i want to get to soon, so we'll make a time jump.. i just don't know how long cause i'll got to count that out, haha!
happy reading