Married Life
Author's Note: Thanks for continuing to read this. Sorry, I've been so…crazy with my posting because I've been trying to get other stories going, so I have had to ignore this story for a little while. Thanks for being patient!
Part Three: I'm a doctor, and a mother!
Bailey, age 5 months
Cameron's Point of View
I've been back to work for the past two months. I'm so lost; I don't even know what to do. I dislike my job more than ever. I don't trust the daycare to watch my son. Do they know if he has any allergies? I know I don't, but still. What if they give him something that he doesn't like?
I feel like a failure every time I leave him in that place. Cuddy is on maternity leave, because she's like nine months pregnant now. It is September now, so it's approaching cold and flu season. What if he gets sick from all those other kids? I felt like an even bigger failure when he got his immunization shots the other day.
His first shots. Robert and I took him. Robert and I don't spend much time together right now. Because at work, we're so busy with our patients that we hardly have time alone. Except for lunch. At lunch, we go to the cafeteria, and eat together. Then, we go to the daycare, and pick up Bailey. At night, I feed Bailey, and check him for bruises. Because, in this day and age, you have no idea who you're leaving your child with. They could be child molesters, or abusers, or looking to sell my kid to the next crack dealer that walks in.
At night, after Bailey is put to sleep, we sit there, and contemplate having another child. And my heart is just not in the right place. I have barely enough love in my heart for Robert and Bailey right now. I just don't want to chance Bailey getting ignored, because it could happen. And Robert could easily leave me. He could decide he doesn't love me or our child, and leave. Like his father did. I'm not saying Robert is Rowan, but it could happen and I don't want to take that kind of a risk with my one and only son.
So, the sex thing is non-existent right now. Because, I don't want to even risk a pregnancy. Because, if something happened and I got pregnant, I wouldn't be ready to care for him/her like I am with Bailey. Bailey is my number one priority right now. And there's nothing that can change that…not even my husband.
Chase's Point of View
I don't know what I can say anymore. I'm almost at the end of my wits end with my wife. She's just so…overprotective of Bailey that I can barely get a word in edgewise. With my own son! I just want to wave my hands, and be like, 'Hello!? Remember me? Your husband?'
But I can't, because then I'd be the bad guy…again. It seems I'm always the bad guy these days. I love my son, I do, but I don't like the person my wife has become. You know those wives that start out all cheery, and nice. Until they go back to work, and then they turn into the Mad Bitch from Hell, and resent you from the time you wake up until you go to sleep at night. And even after that, they're resenting you in your sleep. Because you're not 'pulling your weight.'
And that's so totally stupid, because I spend just as much time with Bailey as she does. And she thinks that because she gave birth to him, that she gets the right to boss me around. I'm almost 35 years old! I'm an adult! I have had to be the adult for so long, that I don't really recall my childhood. It went from birth to age 7, and then I had to grow up. Because, my parents relationship turned to crap as soon as I started school. It seems our relationship soured on the vine as soon as we added a little grape to it.
I just want my life, and my wife back. Because, I know it sounds immature, but I want to have a place in her life too. I miss my old life. I love my son. He's my son, after all. And I know she thinks I'll be like my father. I know it. But, I won't. Because she'll end up pushing me away before I could even attempt to be like him.