Healing Him

Sasuke's POV

Sasuke looked at Naruto, souless. But only superficially. He couldnt tell him how much he had missed him. He couldnt just walk in on and be like nothing had changed, nothing happened. Cause it had.

So many things were now standing between them ,separating them like galaxian miles, even if the meters that kept them afar physically couldnt count for more than two.

Shrugging at the care and tenderness the blond's simple question was hiding within, he avoided to look into the worried cerulean eyes, still not understanding that even in his aweful condition, his old friend could find the strength to put others over him all the time.

Sighing softly, he dwelled in secret bitterness in the knowledge of the fact that he would never be like Naruto. No, his heart was destined to have room only for a few people. His family, Itachi and maybe…maybe Naruto?

But no matter whom he loved in his life, who loved him, who he could overpower and who was stilll better than him, he knew that his heart's power would always seem like a tiny metal empty vessel next to Naruto's big one.

And for some reason, this irked him. He vaguely wondered from time to time, if he would be more open to have feelings for people, more open to positive relationships and caring if he hadnt experienced that terrible night when his brother murdered his clan, his family.

Who would he be now if the massacre has never occured? To add to the bitterness, all reasonable thoughts led him to believe that things would surely be a lot better.

Snapping back to reality and focusing on the person sitting on the floor in front of him, broken and weak as it was, his onyx eyes took an unreadable expression as he countered with a reply.

''They aren't for me.'' He said coldly nodding to the tools with his head.

''I said I would take care of your wounds myself, did you forget already, Naruto?'' he added more softly, emphasizing on his name.

Making some slow but confident steps, he covered most of the distance separating them and kneeled down in front of Naruto, his eyes pinned on the small table.

Placing a hand carelessly on the tools, he examined some of them, his brows furrowing together for some seconds, as he touched the tip of the metal with his index finger to make sure it was ideal for the operation.

Closing his eyes for some second, to take strength in what he was going to do, he let out a soft but deep breath.

He had only done the same thing to himself before. He hadnt risked with anyone else's life using his beginner level medic skills.

But Naruto wouldnt let anyone else heal him and Sasuke had to hope he, as the raven haired man he once considered a friend, had more chances to soften up the blond's resistance. After all, he would never accept to let him die and he was willing to risk harming him worse than stand still and watch as his friend passed away.

Clenching his free fist, he slowly turned his head to face Naruto. Onyx eyes boring into cerulean ones, he examined the blue pools for some moments, as if he was trying to hypnotize the blond so as in to feel not pain at all if possible.

But he knew he didnt have such a skill, as some of the high lvl medic nins had, nor did he have any substance to give to the patient to ease his pain.

He had asked Madara persistently for something similar, but the man had denied, saying such stuff was expensive to buy and he wasn't in the mood to waste his precious supplies on an enemy.

His gaze softened up, as he felt himself getting lost in those eyes, who betrayed so much sentiment out. Was this really one of the reasons he liked Naruto?

The contrast between the two men was so obvious. Sasuke was an emotional iceberg-even if solely superficially- and Naruto was the ever hot headed unable to control his feelings one.

And strangely, Sasuke rejoiced in that feature of his old friend. Cause it felt refreshing being with someone who wasnt like him. With Someone who was different…and who could give him what he couldnt give himself…Feelings.

''Naruto…forgive me but I have to do this…''he said after he activated his sharingan so as to eye the wounds better.

Placing a stable hand on Naruto's naked shoulder, he pressed softly , his eyes never straying away from Naruto's.

Silently performing a paralyzing jutsu he had learnt by Orochimaru years ago, his chakra passed from his hand through Naruto's skin and spread to all his body parts, paralyzing them all in a fast pace.

Of course, Naruto could still talk or understand what would happen around him, but Sasuke had to do this so that he didnt have any risk of Naruto moving around fierecely and thus causing Sasuke to hurt him accidentaly with the sharp tools.

If only Madara's useless medic nins could do that things would be a lot easier but somehow he wondered if the real reason he had chosen to heal Naruto himself was just that the blond wouldnt let anyone else.

Nodding to Naruto to relax him, he massaged softly his arm, whispering soothing words.

''Don't worry, I will be done fast.

Removing his hand from Naruto he focused his gaze back on the tools, thinking slightly before choosing which ones he would need for this case.

After some thought, he took a piece of clean but thick tissue and plunged it into a small bucket with warm water.

Taking a steady hold of the small towel, he started running it slowly over Naruto's body.

Ripping his semi torn shirt out of the way, he rid Naruto from it with one hand slowly, as he kept cleaning the blood out of his wounds and skin with the tissue, trying to cause as less pain as possible to the already hurting body.

His eyes ever avoiding Naruto's as for some reason he felt akward in the very situation, he examined Naruto's bare chest that seemed manly and weak in the same time.

The fight really had taken a bad toll on him. Wincing in sadness internally, he plunged the tissue in the water once more to clean it from the blood.

Taking out after some seconds, he started caressing Naruto's arms with it, droplets of warm water marking brief but slow routes down the tanned skin.

Shifting closer to reach more places, he looked shortly at Naruto's eyes, hesitating if he should go on with the cleaning. It seemed as if he had to reach to the blond's thighs, cause he had wounds even there but he didnt know if he was able to handle it professionally.

Instead, he pushed the disturbing thought away, and shifted even closer afer a brief wait, pulling the paralyzed Naruto softly against his chest.

Placing his head on the blond's shoulder, he used one hand to press the man on him and with the other he took on running the wet towel up and down the kitsune's bare back spine, cleaning it of the dried blood and soothing his wounds. Gladly, his back didnt seem to have received the worst damage. So far it seemed as if his frontal had been the one to receive the biggest wound infliction.

Feeling Naruto trembling in his embrace, he whispered smoothly.

'' It's okay. I am almost done.'' His voice came off as a husky whisper, though his own uncertainty and hesitation were gracing his tone.

Examining the man's back once more, over his shoulder, he made sure that he had cleaned all the wounds before pulling away softly and letting Naruto carefully lean his back against the pole.

Now begins the hard part, he thought anxiously, as his gaze avoided Naruto's once more, searching for the table with the medic tools.

''I will try to hurt you as less as possible. But I want you to be patient. Okay?'' he asked in a low tone, looking into Naruto's eyes unsure for some moments, as his hand had made already its way to grab a thin but kind of long needle from the vase with the tools.

Naruto's POV

Naruto was used to people watching him. Sometimes watching out for him, taking care of him, but mostly, they just watched him. They had done it since he was a kid, albeit it had never really bothered him. Even when Naruto started growing up and realized that so much about his life was just not normal, society's ever-present gaze rested on him like a hard weight. He'd never questioned it. It was just there. Then Naruto became Hokage. He had fought tooth and nail for so many years, though when he finally reached his goal, nothing felt right about it

.And he knew why. It was because of [i]him[/i]. Nothing would ever seem right without the one he'd lost, the one he couldn't get back. His dark image had followed him— haunted Naruto in his dreams. And no amount of staring or actions could free him of it

.

Breathe breathe breathe…

Maybe Naruto had died a little inside, knowing he couldn't bury his own friends properly. Knowing that they had been thrown into the ditch someplace. Or a river. Maybe Naruto died a little inside when he'd been pushing to be so perfect all these years— to make up for all the things he lacked —and realized it still hadn't been enough for Konoha.

For Sasuke to come home, and stop being a dream. They'd needed something better, deserved something better, but Naruto knew it wasn't possible. It would never be possible.

Little pieces of Naruto seemed to have died every day, with every move, every move that was performed without Sasuke by his side. Big pieces of Naruto had died when he saw things that reminded him of Sasuke— the training grounds; the Uchiha compound; someone who frowned like Sasuke, deep and serious, and Naruto would wonder if Sasuke was really ever gone at all.

Naruto pulled consciously at the shred's of his shirt, a bit that was sopping up the red. He didn't want to understand the circumstances of what'd been happening anymore; not when Sasuke was with him for real.

''Hmmpff…they aren't for me.''the blond blinked, glancing nervously to the medical instruments. ''I said I would take care of your wounds myself, did you forget already, Naruto?'' It was hard for him to swallow, especially when Sasuke said his name in a way that made the world seem to stop on it's tilt.

Naruto.

He'd spoken so softly, so melodic... it bordered on something else entirely. Naruto's head snapped upward when his name was spoken, his expression blank.

''y-yea, I did.'' he answers quietly. Because truthfully, Naruto had forgotten all about being healed the moment Sasuke promised. Mostly because he still didn't want to be. For an instant, he was tempted to scream this at Sasuke, but the Avenger was moving, crossing the invisible lines that would've had him scurrying back if it were anybody else.

Anybody but Sasuke, who had haunted him so many times it didn't even matter anymore.. because the longer he was around, the longer Naruto thought he might hold on to the scraps of his sanity. He bit down into his cheek, tugging more absently at his shirt as Sasuke knelt down, staring at him.

''Naruto…I am sorry but I have to do this…''

Naruto looked at Sasuke for a moment, his face anxious and shifting. What caught him, however, were those eyes. Those eyes... those eyes! He'd been dreaming in their web, and now, he was tangled. He'd known the moment they bled red, churning from his precious black to a dark ruby.

Naruto has no words. Instead he just swallows convulsively, once, again, and turns frightened eyes to everything near Sasuke, whose face is inches from his. He wants Sasuke to not be so close. He wants Sasuke to take it all back. He wants his best friend to make everything better again, and that's probably the most screwed up thing here.

"Sasuke, '' he says. It's all he can say, and he knows that there's fear in his voice that makes him sound much, much younger. Sasuke's hard-lined, familiar face with his red glare and shadowed jaw remains frozen, and the hand on Naruto's shoulder starts to make him go slack. Naruto isn't sure how to resist, so he ends up paralyzed under that seeping gaze.

''Don't worry, I will be done fast.''

" Wait.''

His voice was trembling and timid. He was scared. So scared. Didn't want to be patched up from this madness. Sasuke's touch felt cool against his skin and Naruto wasn't sure for a moment if Sasuke was even there. It was taking over so quickly. The lack of control that drew his consciousness to a high, and had him studying Sasuke's movements. He let out a hiss as wet cloth brushed over his injuries, cleaning them of the blood and grime.

Naruto feels his teeth grit together, though his lips remain parted. He's looking helplessly at Sasuke, thinking that this will never end.

'' It's okay. I am almost done.''

He is shaking, quivering. Everything hurts, and Naruto's scared to even breathe. He can feel the Uchiha reign him closer— his jaw resting on his shoulder —and he won't stop him, because Naruto's like a rag doll, his hair lolling against his cheek and body limp.

Sasuke's careful, gingerly touching each injury while inspecting it. Everything hurts less while Sasuke keeps that hold on him, though it doesn't do much for the ache.

When he's settled down, Naruto thanks whatever god that's still out there. Sasuke lays him back carefully, and glances back at... at... something Naruto doesn't even want to consider.

''I will try to hurt you as little as possible. But I want you to be patient. Okay?''

Naruto tried to stay focused, to keep his attention locked on Sasuke's face. Those eyes... god, they were so centered now. He was losing his train of thought. Soon though, the blond whimpered, feeling more than seeing Sasuke's needle begin to thread his raw skin. His breathing became ragged; a tad off beat. No matter, his attention lingered on Sasuke.

Almost like he was trying to pretend none of this was happening— that he wasn't so broken and Sasuke wasn't trying to drag him back from the dark —and it was just another day. Where Konoha was bright... where the people still smiled.

''S-sas..!'' His eyes snapped shut, trying to block the brunt force of the sting that came from Sasuke's work. Another tired whimper clotted in his throat, choking him. The blond knew Sasuke was almost done, that all of this pain was unavoidable... but each flicker of movement felt like someone pounding on his head from the inside out.

By the time Sasuke actually shifted back, finished with his work, Naruto was stalling for air. His head drooped, tears welling in his eyes. He knew Sasuke had made sure to be extremely careful, but Naruto felt more dead than alive. Blue eyes drifted to a soft close for some moments, feigning an awkward composure.

When they opened again, they immediately looked for Sasuke; for his dark hair, his brooding expression, and tense reserve. A hazy smirk grew on those lips, only a small portion actually cooperating from the idea of comforting his Uchiha's nerves.

The smirk quickly fell into a grimace however, as he sighed. The blond could barely manage to move his right hand while the jutsu slowly wore off, and doggedly drug it upward an inch or so to touch some of the bandages Sasuke was starting to wrap around his ill frame.

Really, the kyuubi was going to reach for the Uchiha in passing, but knew he'd be unable to pull such a thing off. So, he settled for second best. Sasuke's hands glided effortlessly against each part of his skin, covering him in bits of white to hide the marred skin beneath.

How many people might die because he received this treatment?

The question settled harshly on his lips, waiting to be asked. Naruto tried to count the number of wrappings Sasuke had cared to tend him with, but found himself getting distracted as time wore on. Finally, the boy just flicked his attention to those black eyes... defeated.

''A-are they healed?'' the question is firm.

He's already trying to picture what villagers may have readily survived, but hesitated in asking the true number. Because he was scared of it. Terrified. The blond stares at the dark angel just a couple feet away, swallowing his sanity and bottling up whatever throb still had the nerve to ring in his bones.

... Was Sasuke aware how different he seemed?

Naruto still couldn't place it. He'd give anything to touch that pale cheek of his though, and wipe it away. He'd missed Sasuke so much— been damned by his memory for so long— Naruto wished he could keep him closer than ever.. if only to prevent the Uchiha from running away. Because slowly, Naruto is beginning to realize that, Sasuke is all that he has left of himself.

''Promise me... t-they'll be okay.''

Trouble finding parts of this story. I think some chapters aren't in my folders. I found the current one, but I can't seem to find the next one.

You understand if this keeps happening with more, I will have to end this story abruptly. I have most of the chapters, but if a few are missing, it's ruined, right? I don't like leaving gaps. We shall see what happens. :/

I apologize for this mess.

Review, please!

Have a nice day. :D