Fandom: Transformers Bayverse ('verse)
Author: and
Rating: NC-17 for mech/mech sticky
Summary: Ratchet is finally ready to revive both Prowl and Jazz. Despite the unanswered questions, the Autobots at least have their SIC and TIC back. Well, once somebody is willing to prey them from each other.
Notes: This will be Dathanna de Gray prequel 5: Hunting Pleasure prequel: Home is Where The Spark Is in the regular story posting of the series.
Full Circle 4: Home is Where The Spark Is
"Please remove the sedatives, Ratchet. I am not a threat to myself or others."
Mikaela nearly jumped when the deep, static-laced and nearly lifeless-sounding baritone responded well before she could realize the black, white and red mech was conscious again.
She was still connected to her mentor and lover, and through him, to Prowl in case there was a need for emergency spark stabilization. Through it, she was aware of Ratchet making several swift changes to the TIC's relays and systems, and brilliant golden optics immediately lit.
Even with Ratchet largely blocking her perception of him, she was aware of the strength of Prowl's processors, and the even deeper strength of his feelings for the mech who still waited in stasis next to him. The pain, confusion and quickly mounting desperation to know what was going on with his bonded filled Prowl's awareness, blocking out nearly everything else.
Prowl's face immediately turned to the still but perfectly repaired silver form on the next berth and he attempted to get up far too fast. "Jazz..."
Through Ratchet, she saw how uncoordinated the effort was compared to normally graceful, precisely controlled movements of the TIC.
"Please don't attempt to get up just yet, Prowl, Jazz is fine," Ratchet assured him calmly, using his hands to enforced his order with minimal force. "His spark is stable, more stable than yours at this point, and I will bring him up as soon as I have run a few scans on you."
Mikaela could vaguely feel Ratchet performing several diagnostic scans on the sensor-winged mech and found herself compelled to reach out to him.
~He asked Sam to have us to wait for you to get here before we woke him.~ She was not sure if he would hear her, or even understand if he did.
~Smart. No telling what state he'd be in,~ the Autobot TIC responded to her in an effort to distract himself from the fact he was only just out of arms reach of his formerly dead bonded and wasn't allowed to touch him. ~He doesn't always respond well after severe trauma.~
~That's a polite way of putting it,~ Ratchet huffed even as he shifted his grip to assist Prowl in standing, balancing the large mech for the two steps before Prowl had one hand on Jazz's berth and the other over Jazz's spark chamber.
"I can feel it," he spread his fingers over silver chest armor, "but I can barely feel him." Prowl looked over at Ratchet, even knowing the medic was even further out of his depth than Prowl himself.
"Understandable given what happened," Ratchet said gently, still subtly steadying the other mech. "If you sit down on the other berth, you can hold him as I bring him up."
The piercing desire not to loose contact now that he had it lanced threw even Ratchet's shielding of Mikaela, and she was fervently grateful he was doing what he could. If this hurt, made her heart ache, she didn't want to think about the intensity of it raw. Even so, Prowl nodded after a moment and allowed Ratchet to help him settle on the second berth and brace against the wall.
When the medic was satisfied that Prowl wouldn't fall over he turned to move the relatively tiny form of Jazz, still lax in stasis, and arranged him in Prowl's arms. She could feel the fondness, the silent 'they are sweet together' that crossed Ratchet's processors when Prowl curled forward a bit to touch his forehelm against Jazz's.
"He's going to want to spark-merge as badly as you do when he finishes booting," Ratchet warned them. "Normally a bad idea with how weak you both are, but given the circumstances I think it's the best thing you can do. A simple merge. Not for overload, just to re-establish your bond. I don't know what state his processors are going to be in."
"It's all right Ratchet," Prowl looked up at him with dim optics. "I know him."
"Of course you do," Ratchet nodded and went about bringing the SIC out of stasis.
Jazz shuddered, his vents hitched, his awakening much less smooth than Prowl's. His visor flashed to life, cycling once at what came into focus first. Without hesitation still-uncoordinated hands reached up to pull Prowl's helm against his, soft whispered sounds escaping him as he gripped his bonded with every scrap of strength in him.
Relief, so intense it was painful, rippled across the connection from Prowl as he returned the whispered sounds and fierce embrace.
"Jazz, I want to hook you up to my socket as well, so she can strengthen both of you if need be," Ratchet tried to get their attention.
The silver mech barely spared him a glance but nodded and extended a cable from his shoulder joint.
~This is going to be intense,~ Ratchet warned her gently. ~I can't shield you enough from what they're about to experience, what they are experiencing.~
~Worth it,~ she responded, wiping a tear that was trickling down her face. ~Giving them back to each other is worth whatever it takes.~
She felt Ratchet surround and embrace her mind with a love and affection so deep it took her breath away, even as he held her close to his spark, preparing to shield her from what he could. She melted physically and mentally into the embrace, willingly relaxing herself to take whatever was coming.
The moment Jazz connected she felt his presence hit with all the subtlety and gentleness of a class five hurricane. Yet after all the concerns and whispered things she'd heard about him, especially since his rebirth, she couldn't feel the darkness or danger that everyone seemed to think was so intrinsic to him.
"Ah'm stable, she can go, ya too," Jazz focused on Ratchet briefly, his intentions to merge with his bonded crystal clear across the connection, along with 'this is not for onlookers'.
Mikaela felt Ratchet dig in his heals. If something went wrong, he might only have seconds.
"It's not you I'm concerned for, Jazz," Ratchet said gently. "Your spark has been strengthened daily, sometimes twice daily for the last three decaorns. Just a joor ago, Prowl's spark was in as fragile shape as yours just after you came back, and he has only had one medical charge. Believe me, I want to give you your privacy. But I won't risk your bonded's spark."
Prowl caught Jazz wrists and shifted to press his forehelm and crimson chevron against the side of Jazz's helm. "I know your concerns love, but this is Ratchet."
"Just another mech," Jazz hissed back, barely audible to Mikaela, though the turmoil on the other end of the connection from both of them was flaring higher. "I'll kill them."
"Not if you can't move," Prowl suggested, feeling as uneasy with the suggestion as he sounded. "We need this, but we need them here."
Jazz shuddered, met Prowl's optics, and nodded very slowly. "All right."
Mikaela could feel Ratchet's discomfort and concern as deeply as the turmoil from the other two. Her mentor did not want to put her at risk. His every instinct was to protect his socket from a dangerous situation, to remove her from the room. But his medical protocols demanded the she be there, hooked up to mechs who would potentially attempt to kill her out of instinct if they interpreted her presence as a threat to their bonded's spark. It was why bonded pairs did not merge with a socket connected unless the organic was already claimed by one or both of them and would be recognized by their systems. Mikaela was the only socket Ratchet dared to use, because he was confident in his ability to protect her from the weakened mechs. But it did not make any of them feel any better about the prospect.
~I'll take the risk, love.~ Mikaela's mind whispered, though she inwardly cringed as the reality of the risk hit her.
"Just do it, 'for ah change mah processors," Jazz hissed at Ratchet even as he shifted so Prowl could control how close their chests were. He disconnected his cable from the link and focused fully on his bonded, gently touching his forehelm to the white center of Prowl's chevron and slid his arms over Prowl's shoulders to hold him even when he went limp.
Mikaela sensed Ratchet taking complete control of her to make her presence as passive as possible, hardly even registering as background noise to the two mechs as their chest plates parted with a distinctive sound. She limply stared at the fierce light burning in each of them, the pure white of Prowl and the deep, purple-blue of Jazz. Their sparks seemed to lunge forward on their own accord to reestablish what had been lost with a fierce need that she had nothing to compare to.
Her first sensation was of pain and loss so overwhelming and deep that she would have screamed if Ratchet hadn't completely blocked her ability to move or speak. Even with her mind wrapped in what felt like a thick wool blanket, the agony both mechs had experienced in the breaking of their bond would have made her lose consciousness save that her lover kept her firmly awake with a profound apology. She had to be ready in an instant if things went wrong. And then an even different pain was shared, one she could not understand, but which clearly came Jazz - a terror and agony she never would have expected to come from the mech whom she had barely known, but was said to be afraid of nothing, not even the Unmaker himself.
Prowl's soothing efforts, the stunned sensation and amazement at whatever had happened to Jazz began to wash over the pain. Approval so strong it stunned her came next, shortly before the echoed sensations of Jazz shifted to submission out of fear and a determination not to give up at any price; even his own pride and sense of self.
She felt another shift in the link, though she couldn't name it. Longing, hunger and relief flooded her from both mechs, slowly settling into a contented warmth as they stopped being 'Jazz' and 'Prowl' and became a single entity both sides welcomed becoming. Even the color of their sparks had merged into a much lighter blue-tinted amethyst.
~It's safe now,~ Ratchet barely whispered in her mind, disconnecting Prowl's cable from his own, but keeping her firmly wrapped in his fiercely tender presence, wanting nothing more that to sooth away intensity of what she had just experienced. He cradled her to his chestplates and surrounded her with both hands, shutting out the world as he carried her out of the room and to their quarters.
~What was that?~ she asked when she could finally find her mental voice. ~What the hell had Jazz so terrified?~
~I have no idea, nor will I ever be told,~ he responded, obviously as confused as she was.
~The merge was beautiful, Ratch, despite the pain. Is it something you would ever want?~
She could feel that the question gave him pause. He stood holding her several long seconds, and she could sense his processors working.
~I've thought about it,~ he admitted. ~I've fantasized about those I have claimed returning as one of my kind. I'm not sure I could bear to be that fully known, to be honest. It is, frankly both a terrifying and intoxicating prospect. I think I could have with Hide if he didn't already love Chromia so fiercely, but because of her I never allowed myself to be anything but a casual lover. The only way I think I would consider it is if I found someone who loved and treasured my socket as much as I do.~
It was obvious that they both were thoughtful as he began soothing away the past hour with sharing far more gentle than their norm.
Jazz rebooted first, feeling contentment for the first time since leaving Cybertron. He lay on top of Prowl's much larger frame, their chest plates closed, their sparks strong and once more pulsing fully in synch, Prowl's arms wrapped around him. He was fairly sure he could be content to remain right where he was for the rest of his functioning.
A low-energy warning blinked on his HUD, informing him why he'd cycled on line when he didn't particularly want to. It wasn't enough to make him move, but the knowledge, the sense that his bonded would need a cube shortly did motivate him enough to gently squirm his way out of the embrace to bring the two medical-grade cubes on a countertop nearby to the berth.
He sat on the edge near Prowl's hip, sipping on one cube and simply watching the relaxed features. He'd never grow tired of it, of watching his bonded recharge. If Prowl wouldn't be waking soon, he'd have snuggled back in, but he needed to get energon into the stubborn Praxian and even more, he wanted to settle in so those sensor wings weren't being crushed by their owner's weight.
In the meantime, he logged into the primary computer he found, grateful that it was of Cybertronian design, and began downloading everything he could on the events since his death, then what had happened on Cybertron since he'd left. He knew full well much of it from Prowl's perspective, but the official version was useful too.
Prowl cycled online as Jazz finished his cube, the same warning flashing on his HUD, which he promptly dismissed in order to pull his bondmate in for a heated kiss.
~It seems improbable that my logic circuits have not glitched. Even knowing it is true in my spark, my processors can hardly accept it.~
Jazz grinned and claimed a second kiss, sliding his free hand up one brilliant red plate on Prowl's chest. ~Ah love ya, glitching logic circuits or not,~ he teased. ~If this isnna real, ah'm not in any hurry ta figure that out. Now drink.~ He insisted as he broke their kiss and lifted the second cube to Prowl's mouth.
Prowl took what was offered without an argument, knowing that critically low energy was an even more likely cause of collapse at this point than anything going on in his battle computer.
~I do not suppose you have any idea what has happened here while you were so rudely detained. Not that I am in any hurry to get back to work. But I cannot find briefing datafiles.~
~Sill working on finding it. Kondosa has a lot in it's databanks, but nothing more than the most basic briefings on local happenings,~ Jazz shook his head in frustration and stole a quick kiss between sips of energon. ~It covers more about current conditions than what I missed out on. Though it seems I was out for over two local stellar cycles, fifty-three decaorns or so.~
~Even in stasis I was aware of how long you were out, love, and exactly when you came back. Is there a computer on base?~ Prowl asked, his need to be fully briefed not nearly as strong as his need for his bonded, but making itself known nonetheless.
~Well, it was news ta me,~ Jazz told him cheekily. ~There's a secondary computer in th' area,~ he passed the login data along. ~Prime 'n crew probably built it with local materials. Ah haven't dug around it yet.~
~I thought of that before you did?~ Prowl teased while logging on. ~Now I'm sure your processors have been affected. And speaking about processors, if you ever even think about taking on Megatron in battle one to one, I'll put you in stasis for your own good. The probability of your survival of such an encounter was .0583. A nice clean assassination, on the other hand, is always in your favor.~
~Did I just get your approval to knife his spark in recharge?~ Jazz grinned, already plotting the mission out.
~After what he did to you in Mission City, yes. Convincing Prime will require tactics I haven't even developed yet.~
~As long as ah have your go-ahead, Prime will never find out ah did it,~ Jazz promised. Both mechs were silent for several moments systematically sorting through all of the pertinent data and reports on the outrageously slow NEST mainframe.
"Primus!" Prowl swore aloud as he found the reports on what happened after Jazz's spark extinguished at Mission City and the more recent battles in Singapore, New Jersey and Egypt.
~Babe?~ Jazz focused on him completely.
~It seems that our suddenly active deity is not interested in keeping Megatron in the Pit. I'm not sure an assassination would do any good. And he is not the only one.~
Prowl directed Jazz's attention to the reports he found.
~Prime and the kid?~ Jazz scowled, not having nearly the reaction his bonded did. ~Well, there are the old stories that only a Prime can extinguish a Prime for good. I guess I'd have to use ol' Megs instead. Still ... a human? Why would Primus care about a human?~ he demanded as he shifted from shocked confusion to anger. ~Ah wonder if He put them though what 'e did mah.~
~I'd much prefer we find a socket to share. It has been far too long. I would not ever wish to find out what Megatron's spark would do to yours should you consume him.~ Prowl immediately enveloped his bonded with his solid, nearly bottomless self-control and calm, cooling and stilling the anger until they could examine the situation together and in full.
~All right,~ Jazz acquiesced without resentment. He still wanted to destroy Megatron that way, but for Prowl he would keep the desire in check. He'd kept it in check since they'd bonded, never taking an Autobot or Neutral and very few Decepticons. One more on the 'don't' list wasn't that great a hardsdhip.
A small part of Prowl's processors, hidden for the moment from the anger of his beloved, were outraged at what Jazz had experienced in the afterlife. Yet he also knew the outrage ought to be directed at a deity other than the one who was the object of Jazz's ire and newly established fear and submission. If Prowl were honest with himself in that moment, he'd admit that it disturbed him far more than learning Jazz's spark had been twisted black by the Unmaker before his birth. To know, unequivocally, that his bonded felt the kind of abject terror at the very thought of the source of all sparks that most felt at the thought of the Unmaker. It tore him apart knowing Primus was real, wanted the best for them, and his bonded would rather be consumed by the Unmaker and cease to exist completely than go to the Well of Allsparks and Primus again.
~We'll find out what is going on,~ Prowl focused on the moment and on stilling the remaining anger in the lithe silver form in his embrace. ~There must be a reason that the same human whose ancestor discovered Megatron also destroyed the Allspark and was instrumental in bringing both you and Prime back.~
Jazz made a confused click and cocked his head before picking out that bit of the report about his own return. ~Okay, but still...~ He shuddered and put it out of his processors. He wouldn't be allowed to do much about it, even if he could, so he focused on Prowl.
~Okay, so everything got fragged and slagged while we were out. We still have us.~ Jazz focused his full effort on teasing the passion out of Prowl with a kiss. ~We'll reassess when Ratchet let's us go.~
Prowl returned the kiss with a fierce passion that would surprise all but those who knew him well and felt the way his bonded relaxed into it, into the knowledge that he was still desirable this way to the one being he needed to be desired by. He pulled Jazz onto his lap and grasped his aft to grind their interface panels together in delicious friction.
Then the door slid open to a surprisingly contrite and apologetic looking Ratchet. His next words told them that their recent vitals and activities had been closely monitored.
"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I need to run a few scans on both of you before I can allow things to become too heated, whether through anger or facing each other senseless. It might have been wise to have waited for a briefing, you know. Nothing would have been held back."
Jazz hissed in irritation but obligingly let Prowl go and settled his systems down as he turned to rest his back against Prowl's chest so they both faced the CMO.
"We were not looking at anything but official reports," Prowl told him, his own efforts to calm down visible in flared sensor-wings. "What we both do when we are restricted to medbay."
"And it is your choice to do so. I'm not restricting your access. Not that it would do any good if I did so. But it might have helped if one of those who had been there had been on hand to explain," Ratchet responded in a calm, surprisingly gentle tone as he plugged in to scan the spark that concerned him the most. After a moment, he unplugged and proceeded to do the same to Jazz.
"I would like to give you another medical charge within the next solar cycle, Prowl, or bring in one of the active unclaimed sockets or Sam if you'd prefer to share a more active charge. But other than needing several good charges, you are in fine shape. Do you have any questions I can answer before I leave you to tire one another out?"
Prowl hesitated for a second, then nodded. "Were there any detectable changes to Jazz's spark when he returned?" he asked, his voice low as he wrapped his stiffening bonded in a comforting embrace.
Ratchet paused for a fraction of a moment, as though trying to figure out a way to explain something he did not understand himself.
"Yes, but not much that I can explain or quantify," Ratchet responded before turning his attention fully to Jazz. "Your spark signature resonates and scans clearly as your own, but there is a difference in the energy we've all been able to sense, though none of us can identify what the difference is. You register to my sensors as Jazz, and yet you register different than before. I've scanned you as closely as I felt comfortable without your direct involvement. The only thing I can quantify is a subtle change in the visible spectrum, similar to the kind of change you'd expect to see after a lifetime of being bonded." He paused for a moment before looking to Prowl. "Can you both sense it as well?"
"Yes, and we know what caused it," Prowl nodded slightly even as he curled inward a little to offer a bit of protection to Jazz when the smaller mech controlled the cringe it evoked. "It is nothing to concern yourself with. I merely wondered if there was a medically detectable result."
Ratchet looked for a moment as though he were tempted to press the issue, but then relented as he saw the discomfort, even fear that seemed to come over Jazz. It was an emotion he had never seen on the mech shy of the rare occasion when Prowl had been badly damaged and he couldn't do anything to avenge it.
"This is all new territory. Unless you can tell me differently, we have no record of anyone coming back when their sparks have been fully extinguished, and now there are two on base and another on the Nemesis. And we have a human who spoke to the ancient Primes, came back holding a matrix of leadership and knowing things he had no business knowing. Optimus and Sam have both experienced after affects of their resurrections. The effects on Prime are subtle. His spark signature also reads differently, like yours. On Sam...the change is not subtle at all. The allspark energy is stronger in him than ever. Every time he shares with Prime, it strengthens. The boy comes across as knowing as much about our history as your do, Jazz."
"That'll be the orn," Jazz huffed.
"The others who died, Prime and Sam, have they said what they experienced on the other side?" Prowl asked, lightly stroking Jazz's side to sooth him even though the silver mech wasn't displaying any signs of needing it anymore.
"Sam said he was in an ancient earth landscape, and was approached by the six Primes. They spoke with him, told him they had been watching him for a long time and saw how he sacrificed himself to save Optimus. They said he had earned the right to be a leader, and when he was back in his body, a Matrix of Leadership was in his hand. He plunged it into Prime's spark chamber, and he came back. Prime then fought Megatron and Starscream and destroyed the spacebridge and the Harvester ship they brought through it.
"Optimus' experience was very different from Sam's. He remembers being in a place where he could not see, but could sense Primus all around him. He said that Primus purified his spark, and that it was the most exquisitely pleasurable experience he had ever had, like the most amazing spark merge, interface, and organic charge all in one. Then he was given a choice, and he chose to come back. We are sure there is much more to it than that, but it is all he will tell us."
Even before he finished talking, he knew Jazz's experience had been as unpleasant as Prime's had been pleasant. Just the fury radiating from the silver mech was enough to cause the medic to take a small step back.
::You may wish to leave,:: Prowl told him over Ratchet's private comm channel. ::I will calm him down. Ask about the socket later.::
Ratchet quickly nodded and exited. ::I will leave you both energon once you are in recharge. Comm me if you need anything,:: he replied to Prowl, keeping a close watch on both mechs' vitals even as he left.
Prowl turned his smaller bonded around to face him, enfolding him in his arms as though to keep out everything and everybody away, resting his chevron on the silver mech's forehelm. He accepted the anger, enfolded it in his own pain and outrage at what his other half had experienced, and the pulled him into the relief and peace and wholeness he felt now that Jazz was with him.
~Love?~ he asked.
Jazz slid his fingers up Prowl's chest, not in a sensual way, but to keeping physical contact on their way to Prowl's face, finally caressing the plates making up his bonded's visage.
~I ... Prime ... the pain was so I could still protect you,~ Jazz finally managed to think coherently enough. ~He had no desire to hold onto the darkness in him. No use of it.~
~I know. I'm bonded to the darkness in you as much as I am to the light. And what I saw when we merged was that when it was clear it would be nothing but agony for you, He would not force you. To do so is completely against His nature.~ Prowl said gently, running his hands over is beloved's sensory horns and then down his back.
~Maybe I'll believe that some orn,~ he murmured, powering down his optics and optic band to focus fully on the feel, smell and warmth of his bonded. ~When that pain isn't the first thing to come up linked to His name. Please, love. I don't want to think right now.~
~Then don't. Focus on what brings you pleasure.~ Prowl slid his glossa along one of Jazz's sensory horns, causing Jazz to shiver in arousal, and then claimed his mouth in a burning kiss that was returned fully. ~You are everything to me. I will never allow anyone to take you from me again. I will leave Prime before he orders us in different cadres again. A vorn or two for a mission that we have planned, fine. Longer than that? Never again.~
Jazz shuddered in relief, a soft whine escaping him when he couldn't find any other way to express the intensity of it. His claws dug into Prowl's armor, still trying to convince himself that this was real and not some dream that would be torn from him at any moment so the pain would be that much more intense when it returned.
He stretched up and pressed their mouths together again. His hands reached back to caress Prowl's sensor-wings as he opened his mouth and brushed his glossa against Prowl's, seeking entrance.
Prowl shivered, his wings fluttering in excitement at the touch while drinking in the kiss as though he had been starved of energy for decaorns and had been given the finest vintage high grade to relieve his hunger. He gently pressed his beloved to the berth and spread the smaller legs with his knees, rocking his hips so their panels nearly sparked with friction and their intakes hitched with pleasure and arousal. He kissed his way down the gleaming silver neck and chest until he was right above his spark, where he let his glossa play with the seam at Jazz's chestplates.
~So beautiful. So perfect.~ Prowl showed the honesty of those words across their bond.
Without hesitation Jazz unlocked his chest plates, offering not just his spark, the life he had never been afraid to loose, but what he did hold dear; his secrets.
~Yours,~ Jazz responded breathlessly and ran a hand along Prowl's chest, relishing the warmth, the pulsing of the spark that resonated with his own, while his other hand caressed and fondled the sensor wings he loved to touch so much.
Prowl's own plates slid back. He was desperate to merge again. Not the painful first merge after the most horrible separation they could endure, but a merge for pure pleasure, to share the depth of his love, to fully accept and be accepted in return. To be known and to be one as their systems cascaded together into a single blissful overload.
Yes, he wanted to thrust his spike into his bonded's tight valve, but he wanted and needed this so much more.
He wrapped the smaller mech in his arms and pulled him over to lie on top of him, guiding his chassis between his own wide chestplates, gasping and keening as the first tendrils of their physical souls intertwined and pulled them even closer together.
~Mine. Yours.~ Jazz gasped across the rapidly strengthening bond as the last reflexive resistance was dissolved by the unconditional desire from his bonded. He tucked his head against Prowl's shoulder, tightened his hands on Prowl's shoulders and dropped not just the shields on his spark and the firewalls he normally did, but he dropped them all and turned off every protective program. He offered not just his spark, his memories, his secrets, but surrendered more completely than he had even when they had bonded.
He offered Prowl the ability not just to look at and know his code, but to change it with a thought and face no resistance.
Prowl actually gasped in shock at what came next. A worm inserted itself into his processors, showing itself to him before burring itself within the same security protocols that guarded his own kill-codes. There were no secrets Prowl held from his bonded, but he had always understood and embraced Jazz's need even in bonding to hold back something. It was part of his most basic nature, his core programming.
Now he was offered a level of submission, surrender and trust beyond anything his bonded had ever offered him or any other. Now the silver mech, the puppet of Unicron and the Terror of Cybertron, his beloved, offered it all. For a moment, Prowl hesitated, but feeling Jazz's deep desire to finally surrender all, he welcomed it, took it in, held what was given, cherished, and allowed the secrets to become part of his own memories.
And such secrets they were. Whiplash, Jazz's TIC and head of Black Ops ... was Jazz's own creation. Jazz had been his carrier, given birth to the lithe, deadly black mech, and he was far older and far more like Jazz than anyone could have realized, both in darkness and light. Silver Shadow and Starjumper, his loyal soldiers, were his only other living descendants, and were being given the skills they needed so they would survive.
And what Jazz was most concerned about them surviving was himself. Three times he had extinguished the spark of one of his own descendants in the rage-filled grief that followed the loss of his bonded. Three names came to him - Whisper, Peace, and Sparksong - descendants who all met their end attempting to stop the raging chaos that was Jazz at the death of his bonded.
He understood, even though Jazz didn't, that the casual disregard for their ends, visible only as the discomfort associated with something Jazz believed Prowl could not forgive, concealed an intense grief that Jazz had no capacity to process and so was rejected as surely as Prowl's own battle computer rejected emotions.
The silver frame above him relaxed, their sparks merging deeper as Jazz accepted the acceptance, even if he couldn't comprehend how it happened.
As fast as the break from the pleasure of a merge had happened it ended and both were plunged into the deep end of a spark-merge overload they had been too distracted by new memories to realize was creeping up on them.
The merge-induced charge racing through Prowl's systems, blinding him to anything but a sense of us and ours, one being with two frames locked in ecstasy that was the greatest gift Primus had ever given, and in the depth of their merge, even that name did not cause his other half pain or terror.
Their voices keened in unison as they became one. They were whole. They would travel to the pit before they ever let themselves be taken away from one another again.
Jazz was shuddering as they gradually came to themselves again, his claws dug into Prowl's armor and his vents and fans straining to cool him to safe levels. He shifted, bringing his face up to stretch for a kiss without breaking the last strands of their spark's physical connection.
~Love you, babe,~ Jazz murmured, his desires not even close to sated now that much of his spark and pain had been soothed.
~Love everything in you, my own,~ Prowl responded, deepening the kiss, needing to affirm with his frame what they had just done through their sparks. He ran his hands up and down his bonded's sensory horns before grasping them to pull Jazz's dermas even closer to his own.
Jazz could only moan into the kiss and melt into it Prowl's frame as their chest plates closed.
~Mine,~ the sensor-winged mech growled into their bond, needing to physically claim what had been taken from him and then given back a hundredfold in their merge.
~Yours, all yours,~ Jazz moaned, his systems priming once more. Even relishing in the demanding control of his bonded and the strange sense of safety it brought, the fire that came so naturally to him began to flare to life once more. His hands unlatched from where they'd dug in and reached outwards to stroke and explore every little detail on the sensor panels spread flat by Prowl's own weight. ~Came back just for you. Only for you. Always for you.~
Prowl mewled and groaned as his beloved turned his magic-working clawed fingers loose on his sensor wings.
~I love you ... want you more now more than ever.~ His processors could barely compute what his bonded went through to come back to him. Who but Jazz would take on a god to come back to his love? Even if a misplaced desire, that Jazz held fast to his darkness, the source of his pain, in order to protect Prowl made the logical mech come undone.
~Please love.~ he begged, desperate now to claim his bonded's valve. He grasped the smaller mechs aft and pulled his perfect, beautiful frame closer with nearly denting strength. His own panel slid back and his white spike desperately scraped against Jazz's panel for entrance, leaving a streak of transfluid already dripping from the sensor laden tip.
Whatyou-needyou-takeme-letmein became a jumble neither cared to translate. Feeling was all they needed. Physical pleasure, bond link, systems synching until no one could tell where when ended and the other began.
Jazz's entire frame shuddered as his panel slid open in response. Even in the tight grip he shifted to try and take the perfectly white spike in, their bond singing with need so strong it left them both reeling, uncertain who needed this more.
In an instant, Prowl had Jazz on his back, hands locked in his own servos and pinned to the berth on either side of the silver helm. He plunged his entire length deep into his love. Home. He was home. One with the most important being in his universe. More important that Prime, Primus, the Autobots, his own self.
Sensors scraped sensors in delirious pleasure-pain friction as Prowl began a frenzied rhythm that he knew his bonded would relish.
Jazz let out a keening howl and wrapped his legs around Prowl's hips, encouraging him, adding power to each thrust that drove him into the berth. His helm fell back, offering his throat to his bonded even as he unlatched his chest plates once more.
~Want-need all of you,~ was more emotion than words, but just the sound of Jazz's chest sliding open and his spark chamber spiraling open was more than enough to make the demand clear.
Prowl's chest plates and chamber were but a breath behind him. He wrapped his arms tight around him and pulled them together, his vocalizer emitting primal, incomprehensible howling keens before fading into static.
~Mineyoursalways~ The unshakable, cool, logical half of their whole was now a creature of wild, hot and fierce dominance, as if he were laying physical claim to frame and spark to fight off whatever invisible forces who would dare to try take Jazz from him again or do him any harm.
In reply Jazz squeezed his valve and thrust his chest up, trying to take his lover even deeper into his body. He threw open his side of their bond, welcoming Prowl's dominance, his protection, and offering a silent, wordless promise that he'd never leave again.
They barely had time to fully merge before the pleasure of spike, valve, relief and spark ripped threw every atom of their bodies, blurring the difference between chassis and spark as much as it blurred the difference between two mechs.