Burning Sunset

As I put on my clothes, a cold breeze touches my thighs, almost making me moan with pleasure… The sinful thought of his icy hands running up my legs brought an overwhelming taste to my lips, resembling blood. As the kimono slides along my body, I can't help but to wonder where he is… Will he be coming tonight…? Will Hinamori be coming along… of course she will. For a brief moment, I wandered within my imagination, on a world where no one could ever judge us, where no one cared about how different we are, where we did nothing but love each other… As I open my eyes, I realize how foolish I am. Why would I have to fall for someone I will never have…? I'm stupid.
- Can I?
As she knocks at the door, Matsumoto's voice can be heard on the other side. I let her in while asking her to tie the bow in my back.
- You look so good Seika-chan…
The sun is going down, the night approaches. I breathe slowly as the sun sets and Matsumoto ties the bow. She is oddly quiet.
- Something wrong?
- I'm just missing him… That's all.
Ichimaru's death brought Matsumoto into a pit of sadness. I understand… It's if there's no more brightness in our life, if there's no hope into the future or faith that tomorrow's a new day. I still recall the times when I held Sousuke in my arms… when he was not corrupted by power, but by a contagious happiness. As I held Matsumoto's hand, a tear falls down her face:
- Come here.
I embrace her tightly into my chest to comfort her. We, Shinigami, are supposed to be as numb as a rock, as cold as a corpse… but there's one thing that corrupt us more than the seek for power… that one thing that can make someone like Matsumoto fall to the ground in defeat… it knocks us out and drives us insane…
- Let it all out Rangiku-san…
Images of him flash through my mind… Tonight… it's the last time I'll ever see him. I shall keep in mind… that it's all for the best. Rangiku finally calms down and smiles while wiping the last of her tears.
- Thanks, Seika. For… you know.
- It's alright.
- I still can't believe you're leaving. I'll miss you.
- I'll find a way to send you my address, so you can visit me anytime you want.
- If my captain let us… you could send the address to him and…
- Please… Just you and Renji will know it. Nobody else.
I… don't want him to know. I need to stay away from him and forget… forget that I've ever loved him.