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BPOV

"Hey what happened to you. I just looked up and you were gone," Tanya said coming into my room and sitting beside me on my window seat.

"Oh, I went for a walk in the woods surrounding the beach. I came across these wolves and I just freaked myself out. I didn't feel like being at the beach anymore," I replied telling a half truth. The wolves had scared me but they were not the reason I decided to leave.

Sympathy covered her face and she leaned in to wrap her arms around me. I accepted her comfort and rested my head on her shoulder. She loved me so much and it was at times like these that I knew I was doing the right thing with Edward.

After what happened with him, I had needed to come home and reaffirm my resolve to stay away from him. When he had held me in his arms and soothed me just with his voice, my will had been ripped to shreds. In that moment I had been thrust into confusion. I instantly started questioning my priorities, my reasoning, and how strong my feelings actually were for Edward.

Now that we had acknowledged each other as mates, everything was different. I wasn't entirely sure that I wanted to forsake him for my sister. I was already feeling a loss, by not being with him. It was so intense it was almost painful. I didn't want to live out eternity feeling this way.

When Edward had first arrived, I'd decorated him up in my mind as a bad person, a villain of sorts, but today he made me see different. Today he had showed me a caring side. He showed me a person who could be lovingly gentle and fiercely protective of a girl who constantly treated him like shit. He couldn't be the villain anymore.

I had tried to pass off what I felt for him as just attraction. Because he was so beautiful, that was easy to do. I could no longer pretend though that what I felt was a reaction to his handsome godlike face. I was attracted to him, Edward the man.

I wanted him, craved him...needed him. I had never felt as safe as I had with him. He'd held me and everything just fell into place. I felt perfect cocooned in him. Every curve of my body was accommodated by his, like corresponding puzzle pieces.

I had to accept these things as true and then move on. Edward was mine but I could never have him. Life wasn't fair and I had never realized that more than I did right now.

Tanya pulled back so that she could push my hair behind my ear and look into my eyes.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

I nodded my head but I wasn't even convincing to myself.

"Bella?" Tanya said softly, waiting for me to look up at her. When I finally did, she sighed and moved a little closer to me. "When you were walking in the woods did...Edward go with you," she asked.

Oh God. Where was she going with this. I kept my face calm as I answered but on the inside fear and panic were roiling inside me.

"Yes."

"Oh Bella I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed. "I promised myself that I would keep him away from you. I've been noticing the way he acts around you. I know that you don't like him and he's probably making you uncomfortable. I'm doing a shit job already," she groaned disappointed in herself.

I felt better and worse at the same time. I felt better because she clearly wasn't aware that I was attracted to him. I felt worse because the same could not be said for Edward.

"Tanya don't worry about it," I said placing my hand on top of hers. "I can handle Edward. You don't have to be my guard dog," I told her with a plastered smile on my face.

"I know. I'm just so hurt and disappointed. I always thought that Edward was such a great guy. I really thought he cared about me you know," she said training her eyes on her lap. "It was all just an act though. He's all charm and lies. He used me and now he's coming after you. My sister! I don't want him to do to you what he did to me," Tanya responded.

"That will never happen," I said. "I don't even like Edward as a person. I would never let him get close enough to actually try and start some type of relationship," I said. The lies I told left a bad taste in my mouth. I was ashamed of myself knowing that I had let Edward get close just hours ago.

"You're right," Tanya nodded smiling. "You're too smart for him. You see through all the bullshit," she laughed.

She stood up but not before giving me another hug. "Don't worry about those damn wolves either. You can kick their asses now. They taste pretty awesome too, just so you know," she said with a wink before leaving my room closing the door behind her.

I sighed and pulled my knees up to my chest. The wolves were the very least of my worries right now.

EPOV

"You have to move slowly Edward. Try being her friend first. You haven't been shown in the greatest light here. You need to show her how good you are," Esme said.

I nodded my head absorbing everything she said. I'd told her everything that happened starting from the hunt all the way to our walk on the beach. It was so good having someone to talk to. Especially a woman. I figured she would have more insight into what Bella was feeling or thinking than me or another guy would.

"But what about Jasper. There's no way possible there could be anything going on there, right," I asked.

Esme shook her head. "Of course not. Jasper would never do anything to hurt Alice. And whether Bella likes it or not she is your mate. She isn't capable of wanting anyone but you," she tried to assure me.

Somehow I still wasn't convinced. I'd seen her with that guy at the club that night. She looked like she wanted him. And what had she done with Jasper that day that had upset Irina and made them feel compelled to hide it. There were too many unknowns and I realized that I needed to talk to either Irina or Jasper. I didn't want to go to Bella. I didn't want to risk jeopardizing the progress we'd made.

"Edward be patient, if not for yourself, do it for Bella. Be secure in the knowledge that she feels the same. Nothing else matters but it'll all work out. The long battle will only make the victory sweeter," she told me, fruitlessly trying to push my hair back.

"Thank you Esme," I smiled. "I really appreciate all your help," I told her.

"What? You don't have to thank me! I've been waiting for this opportunity for nearly 80 years!" she laughed before kissing my temple and leaving me alone to think.

I went to go play my piano. There had been a melody forming in my head ever since I'd embarked on that walk with Bella. I knew the song would be for her. It sounded just like her. I just needed to fine tune it, bring all the components together and make it perfect, like her.

Five minutes later the song was complete. Putting the notes together had been a lot easier than I'd thought. When my fingers touched the keys the music just came.

"You just play that for her. It sounds just like her. She'll love it."

I looked over to see Jasper leaning against the door frame. I knew the her he was talking about and that made me insanely jealous. He got to spend so much time with her, he knew her so much better than me. The jealously only lasted mere seconds though because Jasper was quick to calm me.

"Edward you must know there's nothing going on between me and Bella. I could feel the emotions coming off you while you played. I know what they mean, you know what they mean, and I'm sure Bella has some idea of what it means," Jasper thought.

I sighed and nodded my head. "She talks to you?"

Jasper nodded. "She's scared Edward, that's all. Everything in this life is new to her. She has been given so much to deal with in such a short time. Soothe her. Comfort her."

Esme had said something to that same effect. I was finally starting to realize how aggressive I had been. It was probably doing me more harm than good. I started to prepare myself to fall back a little. I knew that it was going to be hard because I wanted her so bad and I'd waited for her for so long. If I didn't slow down though, I knew I'd be waiting a lot longer though.

I had almost forgotten Jasper's presence but then the most intoxicating scent filled my nose as light graceful footsteps sounded down the hall coming this way. I looked up just in time to see Bella lace her fingers with Jasper's.

So intimate.

She glanced at me and moved closer to him as she looked up into his eyes. "Will you come run with me?" she asked softly. Her voice pleading and almost childlike.

"Of course," Jasper told her while simultaneously calming my fresh bout of jealousy.

"I'll do all that I can to help you Edward but you have to control yourself," Jasper thought. I nodded to let him know I'd heard but I couldn't take my eyes off their joined hands. Would he really help me?

"Come on, Jasper," Bella said gently tugging him away. She glanced between us quickly before settling her eyes on me. "We'll...I'll see you later Edward," she muttered with a small smile.

"Later," I smiled, feeling warmed that she had spoken to me.

Calm. Calm was the key.