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TPOV

I focused only on getting away. I just kept putting one foot in front of the other as fast as I could. Eventually I stopped running and just sat on the ground. I was nowhere descript, just in the middle of the forest. I took a deep breath and started complying a list.

Things That Would Be Worse:

1. Bella and Edward being together, but not mated.

being mated to Edward and he was with Bella.

in on Edward and Bella doing something naughty before I was told anything.

and Bella lying to me for almost two weeks about being mated all the while doing God knows what behind my back thinking that it would save me from being hurt and then telling me about their sordid affair after Bella has killed someone and staying out together all night while I worried to death about where they were and if she was okay.

Oh wait No. 4 actually did happen.

I growled in frustration and buried my face in my hands. I just couldn't believe that Bella would do this to me. I mean she was my sister for crying out loud! I knew that the mating thing couldn't be helped but did she have to lie! She told me that she hated the man, probably so I wouldn't have found out about them earlier.

How could she?

I stood up to pace and ponder. There were so many questions flying around my head right now. I wanted answers but I just couldn't look at either of them long enough to even ask them anything. I guess that I shouldn't have been surprised that Edward would pull something like this. He was an asshole of the first water, maybe it was his idea to lie and she just went along with it. Maybe Edward had taken hurting me up as a hobby…

"Tanya, are you alright?" I heard Kate's voice behind me.

I whirled around to find her and Irina standing just two feet behind me. I hadn't even heard them approach. I sighed and shrugged my shoulders in response to her question. I really wasn't sure how I felt.

"The main thing I feel right now is confusion. I mean I am hurt and more than a little angry but really I'm just confused," I replied.

"About what though?" Irina asked me.

"Well why did they have to lie for so long about it? What the hell were they doing last night? What have they been doing for the past two weeks? What did Edward mean that Bella had tried to fight the bond?" I asked rattling off a few of the questions I had.

"Well she said that she didn't want to hurt you. From what I know Bella didn't want anything to do with Edward," Kate said.

I knit my brows, "What do mean 'from what you know'? Did Bella tell you about this before," I asked.

"No," Kate replied. "But I overheard them talking one day in the piano room. I didn't listen too much because I don't like eavesdropping but I heard Bella saying something like 'we can't, we can't'," she said.

I didn't know what to think about that. Kate hadn't heard the whole conversation. Bella could have been talking about anything at that particular moment. I sighed not feeling too much better about what Kate had told me. I sat back down on the ground and my sisters joined me.

"You know that it wasn't her fault," Irina said. "Mating just happens."

"I know that. I'm not exactly mad that they're mated, it's more like I'm angry that it was behind my back! I'm angry that I had to find out like this! I'm angry that she sat there listening to me gush about him and advised me on what to do and she knew that I never could have him! I mean what the fuck was that shit!" I yelled as my rage started to get the best of me.

Kate and Irina exchanged wary glances and I sighed, shaking my head.

"Forget it! Let's just forget it!" I exclaimed. "I'll talk to Bella when I'm ready but right now we need to get out of Denali. I'm sure we've missed our flight. Now we'll have to drive all the way to Forks. Let's go," I said not waiting for a response before taking off back toward the house.

BPOV

I sat in front of the floor to ceiling mirror just staring at myself. I'd hated my red eyes when I first became a vampire. I thought they had looked odd on my then newly softened and angelic features. While I still hated the crimson hue, they seemed to fit me now that the demon I really was, was visible under my deceptively innocent façade. My fiery irises just made it easier for the humans to see what I had become. Now they could be warned away from me instead of being drawn in. The eyes were the window to the soul and it was no doubt that my eyes would reflect who I truly was now.

"Bella!" Edward said suddenly behind me on the floor and gently shaking my shoulders.

I turned my eyes to his reflection in the mirror and furrowed my brows wondering why he was shouting in my ear.

"What is it, Edward?" I asked.

"You've been sitting here for nearly an hour and I've been calling your name for the last two minutes. You weren't answering me," he said and I could see the concern clearly on his face.

I knit my brows further. Had he really been calling me? I hadn't heard him say anything. I hadn't even heard him come in the room. The last I remember, he'd told me to go inside and take a look around the house.

Upon first seeing the Cullen's Atlin estate, I had been excited to look around the place. It was huge but only slightly bigger than my house in Denali. It was a wooden three storied home and sat on an enormous plot of land. It was surrounded by trees and there was a lake not even half a mile up. Once inside I'd taken in the very cozy yet chic design. I felt as if I was at a sort of extravagant ski lodge or something.

The home was decked out with plenty of fireplaces, windows and French doors, a terrace in the back of the house on the second floor and a huge balcony stretching across the front of the house on the third floor from which you could see the water. I'd looked through most of the place but once I'd gotten to one of the bedrooms and come across a mirror, I had been distracted by my reflection.

"Oh, I'm sorry," I said giving him a smile that could hardly pass as genuine. "I was just thinking," I told him.

"About?"

I shrugged and pulled away from him and the mirror. I stood and looked around the room and saw that none of our bags were in.

"I thought you were bringing our things in," I asked turning to see him leaning against the mirror.

"I did," he replied. "I put them in the master bedroom. This is just an extra room. We'll be staying on the third floor. It was the best view and we can access the balcony from there."

He reached out his hand to me and I took it. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin atop my head. He was so tall.

"What were you thinking about," he asked returning to his previous question that I had blown off. I sighed realizing that he wouldn't give up until I answered him.

"My eyes."

"They'll turn gold again, Bella."

"I don't want them too."

He pulled back seemingly in shock. His brows were puckered in confusion as he waited for me to explain my answer. It wasn't something that I really wanted to get into. I just wanted to lie down and pretend to sleep in his arms. Pretend that I was allowed a break from the turmoil I was currently submersed in.

"It's just easier for others to see what I really am this way. There is no hiding with eyes like these," I shrugged hoping the action would successfully display nonchalance so that we could talk about something else.

No such luck.

"What exactly do you mean?" he asked.

"These are eyes from a horror story, a nightmare, and they fit me."

Edward groaned in what was either frustration or pain, or maybe both. He took my face in his hands and angled it so that I was looking up at him.

"You're not a nightmare," he said sternly. "I thought we discussed this already."

"We have," I nodded. "Now, Edward, can we just lie down now and pretend to go to sleep. I'm tired."

"You're tired?" he asked incredulously.

"In a sense. I like to pretend to sleep sometimes, like right now," I told him. "It's been a long couple of days."

He looked at me for a second longer before nodding his head. He took my hand again and led me up to the third floor. The bedroom was huge complete with a fireplace, sitting area, king sized bed, entertainment system, and adjoining bathroom with both a glass shower stall and sunken in whirlpool bathtub, and his and her sinks. The room had recess lighting and was on a dim setting. The thick dark grey comforter was turned down as if Edward had expected that I would want to lie down and I could see the satin sheets underneath.

Being in this room made me realize just how alone Edward and I were. We'd been alone before of course but there was always a chance that someone would come and interrupt us at any moment. That wouldn't happen here. We were free to do whatever we wanted, for as long as we wanted. That made me nervous.

"Um, I'm going to go take a shower and change out of these clothes," I told him, not able to meet his eyes.

"Okay, Love. I'm going to use one of the other bathrooms and do the same," he replied. "I unpacked and put your clothes in the closet over there. I figured we'd stay for three days?"

I nodded my head. I was glad that he was planning to shower somewhere else. I know that we had sort of bathed together not long ago but it just felt different now.

"Three days is perfect," I nodded.

"Okay."

Edward went to the closet to get what he needed and I headed straight for the bathroom. I shed my clothes and stepped into the shower turning on only hot water. I sighed as it hit my skin and the steam plumed thick in the air around me. I just stood under the spray letting it wash over and cleanse me for a long time before finally washing and getting out. I dried off using an ultra thick bath sheet and wrapped it around me. I went into the closet and thought carefully before deciding what to put on.

I heard Edward come into the bedroom and climb into bed. I wondered what he was wearing. Did he put on actual pajamas or was he just in underwear. Was it even really such a big deal what I wore or what he wore? Probably not. I hoped not. After much unnecessary debate in my head I decided to just put on a silk pale pink camisole and matching shorts.

I went out into the bedroom and noticed that Edward had on a simple white cotton t-shirt. I didn't know what bottoms he had on since he was under the covers already but I forced myself to understand that it really didn't matter about his attire.

I walked over to the bed and he lifted the covers for me to slide in but I hesitated only momentarily as my nerves came back. I got in but kept a small distance between us. We both turned on our sides to face each other and Edward caressed the side of my face with the back of his hand.

"You're nervous," he said in the way that was undeniably a statement of fact but still clearly seeking a response.

"We've never been this alone before."

He smiled and reached for my hand which I immediately gave him. He kissed my knuckles. This was only his second time doing so but it was already becoming one of my favorite ways he showed his affection for me.

"Yes," he said against my hand. "There's nothing to be nervous about. We're just here trying to relax, take some time for us."

I nodded my head and looked into his warm golden eyes. "But what does that even mean," I replied. "I know that we're mated but is there really even an us? I have all these feelings for you, this intense want, need, and overwhelming sense of love but I don't really know much about you. I feel like I'm alone with a stranger but head over heels for him at the same time," I said.

I watched as a frown took over Edward's features. I didn't like how it looked on his face. I found myself closing the small gap between us. I smoothed over his brows with my thumb and kissed his forehead.

"I know what you mean. I wish it wasn't this way either. I wish that things had been easy from the start and our relationship could have fallen into place in perfect order. We've done everything backward," he murmured.

"We have," I nodded. "But we can use this time to play catch up."

"Of course," Edward agreed. He pulled me tighter to his chest as I rested my head on his shoulder. "We're in bed because you want to pretend to sleep. Why do you do that," he asked.

"Well I started after you arrived. I was trying to come up with ways to stay away from you, maintain the will to do so, trying to make you hate me, and all the while advising Tanya on her relationship with you was very draining mentally," I said. "Of course I wasn't physically tired but at the end of every day I just wished that I could stop for a second and rest. So I crawled into bed, cut off every sense I could, and just pretended that I was sleeping."

"Oh Bella I hate that this all was so hard on you," Edward said. "I was hurting you and not even knowing it."

"No, I was hurting myself. If I had just been honest with myself and everyone else, things would have been much easier for you, Tanya, and me," I countered.

"But did you know that we were mates from the beginning?"

"No."

"Then you had no way of knowing that you weren't just merely attracted to me. I don't blame you for trying to avoid me at first. You thought you were attracted to the guy that your sister wanted. You were just being a good sister, loyal and selfless."

I looked up at Edward and couldn't help but smile.

"Why are you always trying to redeem me?"

"You don't need to be redeemed, Bella. I'm just trying to get you to see yourself the way I do," he replied.

He kissed my forehead and then my lips. His candy covered kisses were so addicting. I felt like we needed to catch up on not only our knowledge of one another but also the kisses I'd prevented us from sharing as well. I slid my hands from the nape of his neck into his hair and kept his face connected to mine.

His lips moved slowly yet passionately. It was so different from our first kiss that had been frantic with urgency and need. He was taking his time, tasting and savoring me. My tongue sought out his as his hand slid down to grip the curve of my ass. I arched my chest into him and he pressed our centers together allowing me to feel his reaction to me. I smiled against his lips before nipping his bottom lip and sucking it into my mouth.

"Tell me something else," I said as I kissed along his jaw.

"My favorite color used to be black until I saw you in a blue dress."

He pushed his body into mine until I rolled onto my back to allow him on top of me.

"I've always loved books and since becoming a vampire I can read almost three a day if I don't do anything else," I whispered licking the outer curve of his ear and earning a gasp of pleasure from him.

"I've been to high school seven times, college eleven times, and med school nine times. I'd love to be a doctor like Carlisle but I don't have that much control yet."

He nudged away the strap of my camisole with his nose and placed open mouthed kisses on my shoulder and flicked my harden nipple with his thumb making me moan in response.

"You'll get there, I know it," I replied. "In my human life I lived in fifteen different cities and towns in Arizona."

I pulled off his t-shirt and ran my nails down his chest. He hissed and bucked his hips into me as the smell of my own arousal filled our noses. I could feel my panties being soaked through and I whimpered underneath Edward wanting him to rock into me again but he didn't.

"I taught myself to play the piano when I was human and after my change playing was the only thing that could calm my newborn rage." He took my breast into his mouth and swirled his tongue around the peak before taking it between his teeth. I threw my head back on the pillow and moaned loudly loving the way he made me feel. I thrust my hands into his hair and fisted it tightly.

"Is there a piano here?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Good. I was always clumsy as a child until my step dad Phil started taking me on hikes and rock climbing with him. After braking damn near every bone in my body I started paying attention to my surroundings and learning to mind my balance," I told him.

Edward took my shirt off and reared back on his heels to gaze down at me. I watched his face as he studied my body. No one had ever looked at me with that amount of lust and awe. With anyone else it would have made me uncomfortable, but with him it just turned me on and made me crave his touch.

"I hated what I was before I met you. I was repulsed by myself and how different and unnatural I was. I'd never met a vampire, let alone a newborn, who was so happy, controlled, and accepting of their change. I had been expecting to meet some erratic, temperamental beast when I came to Denali. Instead I was greeted with a cheerful, warm, gentle, and smiling beauty that took my breath away. In time you made me see that it was my mindset that made me unhappy and not my species."

I looked into his face and saw the sincerity there. I could see what my unconscious actions had done for him, what it meant to him. I didn't want to think of Edward hating himself. I only wanted happiness for him and the idea of anything less than that pained me. I grabbed his hand and pulled him back down on top of me. I wrapped my arm around his waist and used the other to run my fingers through his silky bronze strands.

"Maybe you wouldn't have chosen this lifestyle had you been given the choice but that doesn't mean you should let that stop you from being happy. In my opinion being human isn't necessarily a better option. We can't be in direct sunlight, we can't sleep, and we have to sustain off blood. But think about the humans who have it worse. The humans who need sleep but because of their circumstances are too afraid or are too worried to sleep. Think about the humans who need food but are too poor to afford it.

"Our bodies are indestructible yet some humans have to be in pain constantly due to some accident, illness or abusive situation. We don't always have it easy Edward but our situation could be infinitely worse. We will never have to worry about the harsh realities that humans do. If you can't be happy about anything else pertaining to being a vampire, be happy and grateful that so many things are so readily available and far less complicated for us than if we were what we used to be."

"Oh Bella. You see things that I never would have. I'm so fortunate to have found you and I'm adding that to the list of things that being a vampire has blessed me with," he murmured as he stared into my eyes. "I love you so much, Bella."

"As I love you, Edward."

Edward and I talked the night away. We exchanged stories about our change and our first hunts. We shared the memories we held from our human pasts. His memories were fewer than mine since he was a human nearly a century ago but they included Saturdays playing baseball with his friends, Sundays home with his parents, learning the piano and his father giving him whiskey some nights after dinner claiming it would put hair on his chest. I told him about taking care of my mother, moving constantly, settling down with Phil in Phoenix and then being abandoned. I'd had to calm Edward down after that particular story. I was surprised by the intensity of his anger toward my mother but I was also secretly flattered. He cared about me so much.

We talked about all the different high schools we'd attended and the people we'd encountered. We'd both admitted to being lonely and in someway jealous of the superficial troubles and dramas of the normal teenagers around us. Edward had isolated himself from his fellow students in order to keep the secret, I had isolated myself because I knew that I wouldn't be around long enough to even build a real relationship with anyone.

He told me all about his rebellious years and how he'd hunted humans that were dangerous or criminals in order to still get the taste of human blood but not kill innocent people. He eventually still ended up feeling guilt over the lives he took. He found himself losing touch with his humanity and suffered crippling depression. We discussed his family and how he loved them and the special relationships we had with each of them.

I hung on his every word, loving the melodic cadence of his voice, the expressions he made and his nostalgic smiles as he recalled a memory that was special to him. I was so happy to just be able to talk to him, to observe and take him in. To share my life with him and have him do the same with me. It was so easy to talk to him, tell him things that I would be too embarrassed to tell anyone else. It felt like the most natural thing in the world to lie in his arms half naked and divulge all my secrets to him.

As dawn approached, we moved our conversation to the balcony. Wrapped in the oversized quilt that Esme made, we nestled ourselves into a cushioned wicker loveseat to watch the sun rise over the lake. I sat beside Edward with my legs curled under me and my head rested on his shoulder.

"It's so beautiful here, serene and private," I murmured.

"I'm glad you like it. This is one of Jasper's favorite locations," he replied.

A scowl instantly covered my face at the mention of his name. "I don't care to talk about Jasper," I said unintentionally bitter. Of course Edward noticed.

"Something happen between you two?" he asked trying to sound like the matter was really of no importance to him but I could hear the intrigue in his voice.

"After Alice talked to me, she must have talked to him because after I beat Emmett wrestling I tried to give him a hug to share the victory but he pushed me away and offered me his hand," I said holding back a growl at the memory of Alice's smug little face.

"He was the one that taught me to fight, that's what we did most of the time when we disappeared by the way. After Emmett beat me hunting that time, Jasper told me he would teach me to fight so that I could get revenge," I continued.

"Was that what Irina was hiding that day?" Edward asked.

"Oh no," I shook my head. "I've always been interested in Jasper's scars. One day we had been talking and he ended up telling me all about how he'd gotten them. I wanted to take a closer look so he rolled up his sleeve to show me. I was leaning over him, rubbing his arm. My face was pretty close too because each scar smells different and I was smelling them. Irina saw and thought we were having some intimate moment and that I was head over heels in love with him," I explained.

Edward laughed so hard that his entire body shook, shaking me in the process since I was leaning on him. I guess the situation was pretty funny now and I ended up laughing with him.

"Classic Irina," he said still chuckling.

I nodded my head in agreement. "That was the day I told Jasper about how I felt about you. I trusted him with my secret and he was such a good friend to me. Whenever I was having a particularly hard time with you I would talk to him. I thought of him as my best friend, maybe even a brother. Then when he pushed me away like that I just felt like he'd spat on me or something. He clearly didn't try to defend our friendship to Alice. I was sort of dependant on him when it came to needing a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, or just a distraction from everything. He knew that and he didn't care," I said.

"Then he came to my room after Dominic trying to help me. It just made me even angrier. I would have never let my shield down if you hadn't asked me to. I felt so guilty about everything I'd done and I just wanted to appease everyone I'd hurt. I didn't like the way his gift felt, though. It was so odd. I knew how I wanted to feel, how I should have felt but he was there preventing it and making me feel what he thought I should. I just didn't like it and I had to get away after that," I told him.

Edward wrapped his arms around me. "I guess that was my fault too. I had no idea what was going on with you and Jasper. I was just jealous and if I had never made Alice suspicious she would have never thought anything about your friendship," he said. "I didn't take into account the fact that you weren't used to what Jasper can do either. It can be very unsettling and that night definitely wasn't the night to try it for the first time. I was just worried about you. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize for caring about me. You had no way of knowing how I would react. Your intentions were pure," I said repeating what he'd told me before about my intentions with Tanya.

He snorted a laugh and kissed the top of my head. We fell silent as the sun made it's appearance casting a red, orange, and pink glow into the sky that then reflected onto the water. I could hear the birds of the forest waking up and chirping wildly, wings fluttering as they made their way to find food. There was a slight cool breeze that carried the smell of the greenery and the fresh water of the lake. Being with Edward only made the experience so much more peaceful.

I glanced up at his beautiful face, full lips, and perfect jaw and found that he was already looking at me. I smiled and nodded my head toward the rising sun.

"You're missing it," I said.

He shrugged. "You outshine the sun," he replied.

I rolled my eyes trying to hide the fact that I was completely thrilled. "You're going to spoil me, if you keep talking like that," I said.

"I want to," he said. "Will you let me?"

His lips connected with my neck as my eyes fluttered closed. Edward looped his arm around my waist, lifted me and placed me to straddle his lap. I moaned as his tongue snaked out and glided over my collarbone leaving a wet trail which he blew over with his cool breath. My body shuddered as I gasped at the sensation. When he moved to kiss my wrist, I remembered the first time that he had done that, how good it had felt and how I had lied. I had lied about so much and I wanted to go back and make it right. I closed my eyes and dropped my shield.

"Bella!" Edward gasped in shock but then fell silent as I replayed my memories for him.

I thought over the moment I'd first laid eyes on him. How attracted to him I had been and how strong the pull was. I thought over how I had to force myself to overlook it and how hard it was to do so. I remembered how moved I had been when he'd first played for me and how entranced I had been by the way his hands moved.

I thought about the night I'd seen him watching me dance and how I'd imagined the guy I was dancing with was him. I thought about how I had been so glad to see him when I opened my eyes. I thought about the hunt and divulged to him how it had really felt when he touched me, kissed, and licked my wrist. How much I had wanted to touch him too and how I hated to lie to him. I thought about the first time he played the lullaby and how much I loved it. I recalled finally tasting his wrist as I thanked him for composing that song for me. Then finally I replayed just how much pleasure I'd felt when he'd followed me to my spot and brought me to orgasm

When I opened my eyes, Edward's eyes were filled with unfathomable love and lust. His hands gripped my waist so tightly yet it wasn't tight enough. His lips crashed into mine and he kissed me hungrily and demanding.

"Thank you," he breathed into my mouth. "Thank you so much for showing me that."

"I wanted to," I replied just as breathlessly. "I lied so much."

I was still straddling his lap and his erection was prominent and twitching beneath me bringing on my own arousal. Edward's hands covered my bare breasts and pinched my nipples. His touch felt so good, it carried the heat of a thousand suns and I knew without a doubt I would never get enough. I rocked over him and he growled dropping his head down to my shoulder. He suddenly grabbed my ass with both hands and lifted me up. We were back in bed, not half a second later.

My body was screaming for his as I kissed his lips and felt his hands travel down my body. They stopped at the waistband of my shorts. He didn't say anything but I knew that he was asking for permission. I didn't want to end our kiss to speak either so I dropped my shield again.

"Off!" I thought urgently. "Take them off!"

Edward pulled off my shorts as I shed him of his flannel pajama pants. I opened my legs to him so that his hips could nestle there. He sucked my earlobe into his mouth and I bit my lip to quiet my moan.

"Please don't do that," Edward whispered huskily. "I need to hear you."

I release my lip. "Then touch me."

He did not need telling twice as his hand fisted my panties and ripped them away from me. I whimpered, turned on by his fierceness but then he slowed down. He pulled back to look in my eyes as he cupped me between my legs. My hips grew a mind of their own as they bucked into his hand.

"So hot, so wet," he murmured.

"More, Edward, please more," I begged.

I felt his finger dip inside my folds going directly to the bundle of nerves hidden there. I gripped his other wrist as he brought his mouth down to my breast. I was panting and mewling as his finger moved in alternately fast then slow circles. Having him touch me there was pleasure I'd never known. It felt so good and all I wanted was more.

"Edward! Please," I cried and he removed his finger entirely.

That was not what I had meant at all. My eyes snapped open to see what he was doing. He moaned as he sucked at the finger that had been inside me. My eyes widened in surprise.

"So good," he muttered more to himself than to me.

He brought his mouth down and kissed the valley between my breasts and began a trail of kisses going down my body. My breathing picked up as I realized what he was about to do. I propped myself up on my elbows to watch his descent. He lifted my thigh over his shoulder and I chewed my lip in nervous anticipation. He looked up at me through his lashes and I nearly came right then.

"So beautiful," he whispered.

He lowered his head and his warm tongue entered me. I fell back to the bed arching my back and moaning his name. He buried his face into me and sucked my clit into his mouth. He grabbed my hands to keep me still as I writhed on the bed.

"Oh God!"

Edward's tongue swirled around me and lapped at my pussy mercilessly. I clutched the sheets in my hands hearing the seams rip in my grasp. The pleasure was almost too much as my legs trembled and my toes curled.

"So sweet, Bella, so sweet," he said into me.

I felt every word and a coil deep inside me began to tighten. Edward slid a finger deep inside me. "That's right. Cum for me, baby." He curled his finger and my body all but exploded.

"Oh! Edward!"

I felt as if I was caught in a riptide of sheer ecstasy. My body convulsed with it as Edward's tongue languidly stroked me. His hand caressed my thigh as I tried to calm my breathing. Edward kissed his way back up my body and finally came back to my lips. I fisted my hands in his hair and thrust my tongue into his mouth tasting the sweetness he had spoken of. I groaned at the eroticism of it.

Edward ripped away his boxers much like he had my panties. His erection sprang free and the sight of it made my mouth water. It was so very pretty, so very big. He grasped my hip in one hand and planted the other one flat on the bed. He looked into my eyes and my breathing picked up yet again. I placed my hands on his shoulders as I tried to relax. I heard that it didn't hurt as much when you relaxed.

"You're nervous?" Edward said, this time it was a question and I could see the confusion on his face. "Do you not want to do this? Am I moving too fast?"

"No, no," I rushed to assure him. I definitely wanted to do this with him and I didn't think he was moving too fast. "It's just that…I've never done this before."

Edward blinked in response. Then a slow but elated grin spread across his face.

"Never?"

"Never," I shook my head. "I was a virgin when I was changed and I never loved any humans enough to let it go that far."

"I've never done this either."

I imagined the smile that appeared on my face was identical to Edward's. We would be each other's first. We would be each other's only. He leaned down placing feather light kisses on my forehead, my eyelids, each cheek, and then finally my lips.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

I nodded my head and brought my hands to his face to kiss him again sweetly, "I love you."

"I love you too."

Edward positioned himself at my entrance and refocused his eyes on mine as he pushed forward slowly. My mouth fell open as I gasped. He entered me inch by inch and while it was not necessarily painful it was a sensation that I needed to get used to. I could feel him stretching me, filling me until he was fully seated inside.

"Are you alright, Love?" he asked pushing my hair away from my face.

"Perfect," I replied and nodded to encourage him to keep going.

He pulled back out leaving me entirely and then coming back. I moaned feeling more pleasure this time. I began moving my hips to meet his third stroke. It took no time for us to find a steady pace. Our bodies worked as one to please one another. It felt so good to feel him inside me, to surround him. His hands gripped and caressed me, as his mouth lavished me with kisses on my lips, neck and shoulders.

He thrust inside me deep and hard. I didn't fail to tell him just how good it felt. I verbalized my pleasure, panting in his ear and kissing his neck. As his strokes began to hasten, I realized he was close. Just knowing that my body could bring him the intense release that he'd already brought me made the coil inside me bunch again.

"Oh God, Bella! So tight," Edward growled, his fingers dug into my hip before bringing his thumb to my sensitive nub. I cried out arching my back and clawing at his as my orgasm rocked through my body. Edward dropped his head to my shoulder groaning loudly as I pulsed around him and evoked his orgasm as well. He moved his hips slow and deep as we rode out our release breathlessly murmuring our love for one another.

When Edward pulled out I whimpered at the loss of the intimate connection. He pulled me to his chest and buried his face in the crook of my neck. My mind was reeling with what we'd just done. I had always thought it was cheesy when people referred to sex as making love, but not anymore. That was exactly what Edward and I had done. To feel him that way, skin to skin, joined so deep internally, and pleasing each other so entirely was an experience made out of love. I would never tire of sharing that with Edward so I dropped my shield.

"Let's do it again."

He laughed and hitched my thigh to his waist.