A/N: I'm surprised someone hasn't like, yelled at me for not getting this out sooner- I can't believe almost a month has gone by since I've updated this! Life is slowly draining away all of my free time, and marching band has now started, so my month is basically gone. I'm hoping that once school starts in September my life will slow down a little and I'll have more time to write. But until then, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I gave you a teeny, tiny bit of fluff. This chapter starts out in Gibbs' thoughts before returning to Jenny. Remember, Gibbs doesn't know what going on with Jenny, so these are just his theories. Also, thank you blackwidowmistress, Levana Fay, and HesMines for your reviews!
Gibbs sat at his desk, his mind miles away from his work.
Something was wrong with Jen. Her silence, the way she'd acted during lunch, her sadness in the car. His wife was not acting normal, and he intended to find out what was wrong.
Allie's birthday was Saturday; Gibbs let a smile cross his face at the thought. His baby girl was turning five. It felt like only yesterday Jen was telling him she was pregnant. He wondered if that was the reason behind Jen's sadness, but quickly pushed it aside. Any sadness she'd have over that would be miniscule; she was too excited about Allie being five.
It could be her work. The lawsuit had put unneeded pressure and strain on her and her department. Gibbs frowned at the thought; he remembered his anger when she'd come home in near tears. But in the past few days, she'd gotten over it and moved on. So he didn't think that that was the problem.
Was it her…womanly thing? He cringed internally just thinking it. He didn't really think that was the problem. She generally just got a little bitchy and cranky and was fine four or five days later. She didn't usually get sad and upset. So he dismissed that idea.
Then it hit him, all at once.
And he wanted to headslap himself for being an idiot.
Their conversation from three nights ago came flooding back.
They'd been in bed, Allie and Liam had been asleep, and Jen had turned to him. She'd had that look on her face that said she had something serious she wanted to talk about. She'd told him that she wanted another baby. He'd been so shocked, he hadn't known what to say. After the accident that had led to Liam's birth, they hadn't said anything about more children. He hadn't even thought about it, to be honest. He'd almost lost Jen and Liam, just like he'd lost Shannon and Kelly, and he didn't want anything to happen to them, ever again.
He should have seen it, really. When she'd been pregnant with Liam, she'd always said she didn't want it to be her last pregnancy. She'd always wanted a big family; after they'd gotten married and started talking about kids, she'd always been adamant that they have a big family. After her mother's death and her father's murder, she'd had no one left, and he knew that it had been hard on her, having no siblings to turn to. She'd said she didn't want that for their kids, and he'd agreed. But they had two, why did they need more? It wasn't that he didn't want another baby with her; he just didn't want anything to happen to her or a baby.
But that would explain everything. Her sadness when she'd looked at Liam, why she was so distracted, why she was so upset. He frowned, sighing quietly.
He felt like an idiot. He had to make it right again. And he would.
No. No, it wasn't possible.
Could Jethro really have lost a family? A daughter?
Jenny reread the article, tears starting to blur her vision. A daughter…it explained so much. Why he was so good with kids, but why, after they were gone, he was so dark and upset. Oh she wish she'd known during the case with Zach. She could have known what to say…
Her mind flashed to their conversation on the catwalk. Asking him if he'd ever thought about having kids. How he's countered with that comment about it being an offer. He hadn't flat out said yes or no. Now she knew why.
She wondered what they'd been like. Kelly had been eight. Only a few years older than Allison was.
Looking at the picture, she couldn't help but smile. Kelly was a beautiful little girl- auburn hair and big blue eyes the same color as Jethro's. And Shannon was a gorgeous red-haired woman with light blue eyes.
She was ripped from her musing by the sound of Liam's crying. Standing, she walked upstairs to the nursery, where Liam was sitting up in his crib, rubbing at his tear-streaked cheeks with his fists.
"Oh, it's okay sweetheart. Mommy's here." Jenny said quietly, picking the toddler up and cradling him to her chest. He buried his face into her neck, hiccupping as she rubbed his back. "Sh, it's okay baby. I've got you."
"Mom…Momma." he hiccupped, his tears running down Jenny's neck as she hugged him closer, kissing the top of his head.
"I'm right here baby. I love you." she whispered into his hair, closing her eyes against the emotion.
Liam calmed down after a few minutes, curled in Jenny's arms. She kissed his head once again before changing him and bringing him downstairs. She put his coat and shoes on him before turning back to the computer. Deleting the search and its results, she turned it off and filled a travel mug with coffee before slipping her coat on and bringing Liam out to the van. Strapping him in, she kissed his forehead before getting in on the driver's side starting the van.
Her thoughts turned to Shannon and Kelly as she drove.
She could understand why Jethro hadn't told her about them in Europe. She assumed he'd wanted to see where their relationship stood after Paris before telling her everything. She cringed at the thought. What he must have thought, reading that letter. He'd already lost his wife and daughter, and she'd left him in such a cowardly way.
At that moment, she vowed to just accept this life. She would forget about what should be, and just go with the flow of this life. She would let herself be loved by Jethro, as impossible as the thought was. She didn't know how long she had here, and she didn't intend on missing a single second with Allison, Liam, and Jethro.
Pulling up to the school, she smiled at Allison as the little girl ran up to the van, opening the door.
"Hi sweetheart, how was school?"
"It was fun Mommy! We painted, and I made a picture of us at the beach! It's still drying, but Miss Tyler said that I can bring it home tomorrow. And I have a note for you from her. She said if you wanted to, you could bring cupcakes to class on my birthday Friday. And if you want to, you can bring a storybook to read too." Allison said, her face bright with excitement. Jenny's face broke out into a smile.
"That sounds great honey! I'll send you with a note tomorrow. And I can't wait to see your picture sweetheart, I'm sure it's very pretty." Jenny said as she started the van after Allison was buckled in.
"And Molly and Trevor and Sadie said they could all come to my party. They said their parents would call you after school Mommy." Allison said as she tickled Liam, eliciting a loud giggle from the toddler.
"Okay, thank you sweetheart." Jenny said, nodding as she drove.
"Mommy can we have pizza for dinner?" Allison asked.
"Maybe, Allison. We'll have to see when we get home."
"Okay. If not pizza, then mac and cheese?" Allison asked, her face hopeful.
"Honey, when we get home we'll decide, okay?" Jenny said with a small laugh, meeting her daughter's gaze in the mirror.
"Okay." Allison said, folding her arms and looking a little dejected.
"If it makes you feel better, you can pick the movie we watch tonight.' Jenny said in an attempt to get the smile back on Allison's face. It did the trick. Allison's face lit back up again, her grin stretching from ear to ear.
"Okay Mommy! I want to watch 'The Little Mermaid'!"
"Whatever you want sweetheart." Jenny said as she parked the car. Going over to Liam's side, she un-strapped the sleepy toddler, hefting him up on her hip as his head sank onto her shoulder. Allison jumped out of the car, her Little Mermaid backpack swinging on her shoulders as she ran to the house. Jenny followed her in, shutting the door behind her. Kissing Liam's forehead, she laid him down on the couch, where he rolled sleepily into the pillow, burying his face in it. Jenny stroked his hair and covered him in a blanket before going into the kitchen, where Allison was sitting at the table, pulling papers out of her backpack.
"Here's the note Mommy." Allison said, handing her a half-slip of paper. Jenny read it over quickly, the teacher's words a summary of what Allison had said in the car.
"Do you want me to bring cupcakes in sweetheart?" Jenny asked, double-checking.
"Yes Mommy!" Allison said excitedly. Jenny grinned, kissing her on the head.
"Well, then I'll send you with a note tomorrow. And tomorrow night you can come with me to pick out the cupcakes, okay? And the book you want me to bring."
"Okay Mommy! Maybe we can bring one of the Dr. Seuss books we read at night!" Allison suggested, her face alight with happiness.
"That's a great idea sweetheart." Jenny said, brushing a stray curl from the little girl's face.
"Mommy can I watch TV?"
"Sure sweetheart. Just not too loud; Liam is asleep on the couch." Jenny said, nodding to the little girl. "Are you hungry at all Allie?"
"A little. Can I have an apple with peanut butter?" Allison asked, looking hopeful.
"Sure. I'll bring it into you." Jenny said with a smile. Allison hugged her before skipping into the living, where Jenny heard the quiet sounds of a cartoon starting.
Turning to the counter, she grabbed and apple and quickly cut it up, putting it on a plate with a small cup of peanut butter. She carried it out to Allison, setting it on the table in front of her. She kissed first her then Liam on the forehead before returning to the kitchen, where she found the meal list for the week.
Looking through the list, she found Wednesday, where she smiled. Macaroni and cheese with chicken nuggets for Allison and Liam, chicken alfredo for Jethro and herself. Allison would be happy.
Finding everything she needed for dinner in the cabinets and refrigerator, she decided to wait a little while to cook, so it would be ready by the time Jethro got home. Walking back out to the living room, she smiled when she found both Allison and Liam sound asleep on the couch. Not wanting to move them, she sat in the armchair next to the couch and grabbed the remote, flipping through the channels before she settled on the news.
As she watched, she was still disappointed to hear that their troops were still in Iraq and Afghanistan, not that she had expected any different. The fact that she was married to Jethro didn't change the fact that 9/11 had happened. Didn't change the fact the Bush was still president.
Sighing, she closed her eyes, the day starting to wear on her. Snuggling deeper into the chair, she let her thoughts drift before she didn't know what she was thinking or what she was dreaming.
Gibbs pulled into the driveway, his gift for Jenny in his pocket. He was a little early; they hadn't caught a case, and they were almost done with their paperwork. He'd sent everyone home to be with their families, and he was going to spend some time with his. Getting out of the car, he walked to the front door, locking it behind him out of habit. The sound of the news filtered through to him, and he couldn't help but smile. That was so Jen, watching the news while she waited for him.
Shrugging out of his jacket, he hung it up before walking into the living room, where his gaze softened at the scene in front of him.
Allison was curled up at the end of the couch, her head on the arm rest, her red hair escaping her braid as she slept. Liam was stretched out on the other side; his feet tangled in a blanket as he slept peacefully, his thumb in his mouth. His eyes settled lastly on Jenny, who was asleep in the armchair, looking relaxed in her sleep.
Walking over to her, he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, stroking her hair with his hand to wake her up.
"Jen…Jen you've gotta get up babe." he whispered in her ear, kissing the soft skin of her neck.
In her dream, Jenny was in her father's study, standing in front of the thick wooden desk. Her father smiled back at her, smoking one of his Cuban cigars with a glass of scotch in front of him as he reviewed a sheet of paper.
Suddenly, the mood shifted. There was no smile, no cigar, no scotch, no piece of paper. Her father simply held a gun in his hand, a forlorn expression on his face.
"I'm sorry Jenny." she heard him whisper before there was the loud crack of a gun.
Rene Benoit's face leered at her from the darkness she was surrounded in.
Gibbs felt her dream to a nightmare before she had made a sound. Her body tensed underneath his, and then she let out a strangled cry. He hugged her to him, kissing her temple.
"I'm right here Jenny. It was just a nightmare. I'm right here honey. I love you." he whispered, feeling her shaking subside a little. Taking her hands in his, he pressed them into his chest, where she could feel his heartbeat. For some odd reason, feeling his heart beating always seemed to calm her down. Her eyes flew open, taking in the room before settling on his face. She threw her arms around him, burying her face into his neck.
"It was so real." she whispered, pressing quick kisses to his neck and shoulders.
"I know but it was just a dream Jen." Gibbs said, hugging her tightly for a moment before easing back and framing her face in his hands. He leaned in and kissed her gently at first, but soon enough it was progressing to passionate. And as much as he wanted to, there were a number of reasons why they couldn't, the main one being they were in the living room with their kids. He broke the kiss, pressing his forehead into hers. "Jen, we're in the living room. We have to wait until Allie and Liam are in bed."
"Right. Forgot." she muttered, and he smiled.
"It happens. We'll just put them to bed early tonight."
"I promised Allie a movie." Jen said with a sigh, and he laughed.
"Doesn't mean she'll be awake for the whole thing." he said, which elicited a quiet giggle from her. It seemed like she was a little better than she had been in the car. Didn't change his game plan though, he thought as he stood, a hand going to his pocket to finger the object there.
Jenny watched Jethro walk over to Allison and Liam, kissing their heads quickly before waking them up.
She hadn't intended to fall asleep. She must be more exhausted than she thought.
The nightmare had been so vivid, so real. She shivered, the look of La Grenouille's face imprinted in her mind.
The feel of Jethro's heartbeat under her fingers had made her feel…well, to be honest it was indescribable. Warmth spread through her and she smiled. She was going to miss that.
Sighing, she stood up, stretching her stiff muscles. The armchair had done nothing for her back. She rubbed at it, the tension annoying her.
"I'll give you a backrub later." she shivered as Jethro's hot breath spilled across her neck as his hands fell to her hips, pulling her against his warm body. "I have something for you."
"Really?" Jenny asked, curious. "What is it?"
"Later." he said, a smile on his face. Jenny nodded, intrigued. What could he possible have for her?
A/N: I'm finding that I really like writing Jenny/Gibbs in parent mode. Showing a side we really don't see in the show. I'm trying my best to stay as in-character as possible, but also showcase their love for their kids and stuff. I'm hoping I'm doing okay- please tell me in your reviews! And I will try my hardest to get the next update out in sooner than a month!