I woke up the next morning to find Brittany had already gone downstairs. I headed out into the hallway when her mother walked by.
"Oh, hey Mrs. Woods," I said nonchalantly.
"Hello Santana," she raised her eyebrows at me, "late night sleepover again?" She smirked.
"Yes ma'am," I smiled at her. She just laughed and walked away. Thankfully, Brittany's parents were always accepting of me. They understood that I didn't have the best home life and they knew Brittany was my only friend. They were pretty much the only parent figures I've ever had; and they treated me just like I was part of their family.
I walked downstairs to find Brittany eating a pop tart.
"Morning San! I made you a pop tart if you want one," she said with a big smile on her face. I don't know how anyone could be so excited so early in the morning, but that was Brittany for you.
"Thanks Britt." I sat down and ate breakfast with her. After we finished, we put on our Cheerios uniforms and went to school. Every single day we had to wear those dumb uniforms to school. I'm not exactly sure why, but Ms. Sylvester said something about them showing our "status" at the school. Nobody would want to upset Coach Sylvester, so we just listen to what she says. Since Glee and Cheerios were the only classes I have with Brittany, I didn't get to see her all day.
On my way to Glee, I passed by Puck making out with Natalie; one of the Cheerios. I tried my hardest to hold my tongue, but everyone knows I'm not capable of that.
"Aw well look at the happy couple," I said sarcastically, "if I were you though, I'd be careful," I said to Natalie.
"What are you talking about?" She rolled her eyes.
"We just broke up yesterday and he's already moved on. Don't be surprised if you find out he's banging someone else too," and with that I walked away. At lunch, I didn't eat a thing. All I kept thinking about was Brittany and Puck. I was so confused. I thought it would hurt worse when I saw him with another girl, but I expected it. At Glee practice, I was just excited to see Brittany. After the run-in with Puck, I just needed my friend. As soon as I stepped into the choir room, Brittany ran straight over to me.
"Guess what?" She nearly jumped out of her chair when she saw me.
"What Britt?" I played along.
"Mike asked me out!"
"That's…great," I faked a smile.
"We're going to Breadsticks tonight. You can come with us if you want to," she offered.
"Thanks for the offer, but I don't think Mike would want me going on your date," I said with a hint of disappointment in my voice.
"Well you could go with Matt; I heard he really likes you. It would be like a double date!" She really seemed to want me to go, so I agreed.
"Fine, I'll go."
"Yay!" She skipped back over to her chair. I walked over to Matt who was chatting up Mercedes.
"Hey, so I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight, like on a date." He stopped talking to Mercedes to look at me.
"You're asking me out on a date?" He seemed surprised.
"Yes, so are you in or not?" I rolled my eyes.
"Yeah, sure," he stuttered.
"Breadsticks; 7:00," I said before walking away.
Mr. Schuester came in a little late that afternoon. Once he arrived, he introduced us to the rest of the club.
"For those of you that don't know, this is Santana Lopez, Brittany Woods, and Quinn Fabray. They're our newest members."
"What are you doing here Lopez?" Puck leaned over to talk to me.
"None of your business, and my name is Santana, not Lopez, I'd appreciate it if you use my actual name." He mumbled something before turning his attention elsewhere.
After Glee, Brittany and I got ready for our dates at her house.
"What do you think about this?" I asked holding up one of her tops.
"You would look cute in it S." She walked over to me and held it against my chest. "See, told you," she said motioning to the mirror.
"What are you gonna wear?" I asked her while getting undressed. She walked out of the bathroom wearing a yellow sundress and some white sandal wedges. I wasn't sure why, but it felt like I had the breath knocked out of me at the sight of her. I saw her dressed up before, but this time it felt different. It took me a while to calm down and speak.
"You look… great Brittany, like always." I smiled at her, and then quickly turned my attention back to getting dressed. "So what do you think?" I whirled around to show her my outfit.
"We match!" We both looked in the mirror and I noticed she was right. I laughed to myself at how in sync we were.
"C'mon, we better get going." We locked arms and went to meet Matt and Mike at Breadsticks. When we arrived, our dates had already gotten a booth.
"Over here!" Mike motioned for Britt and me.
"Hey Brittany, wow you look really great," Mike said looking her up and down.
"Thanks Mikey." She slid into the booth next to him. As soon as she sat down, Matt stood up.
"You look," I didn't let him finish his thought.
"Yeah, thanks," I mumbled before sitting down.
About an hour into the date, Brittany and Mike seemed to be enjoying themselves; holding hands and laughing a lot. Matt tried to hold my hand multiple times, but each time I yanked it away. I wasn't sure why I was so upset at the fact that Brittany was enjoying herself on a date. I should've been happy that she was happy, but I couldn't be.
Stupid Puck, you had to put the idea in my head. I wasn't even sure why I was feeling this way. I don't like girls; I'm certainly not a lesbian, but these weren't feelings that someone who's just a friend would be having for another friend.
"You have some ice cream on your lip," Mike said once dessert arrived.
"Where?" said Brittany with a mouthful of ice cream. Mike took his napkin and wiped off Brittany's lip. She smiled at him and they stared at each other for a few minutes.
"Can we go now?" I stood up and walked out of the restaurant. Brittany quickly followed.
"We haven't even finished eating yet San," she said politely.
"I'm not feeling too good. Guess I ate too much." I saw a look of disappointment sweep over her face. I didn't want to take her away from her date because of selfish reasons. "But you can stay if you want to."
"No, best friends stick together," she perked up, "and if you want to go home, then I will too." I wasn't sure what else to say, so I grabbed her and pulled her into a hug. We went back to the table and let Matt and Mike know we were leaving. Mike and Brittany snuck a quick kiss before we ducked out of the restaurant.
"Do your parents know you're staying here tonight?" Britt asked once we got to her house.
"I called Bob and Lisa and they said they could care less." I tried to pretend I didn't care, but it hurt. It was like they never wanted me around. At this point, I might as well have just moved my stuff into Brittany's home, it's like I lived there anyway.
"I'm sorry Sanny." After talking for a few minutes, we said goodnight to her parents and went up to her room.
"Did you bring any pajamas?" She asked as she got changed in her bathroom.
"No I… no."
"That's okay, you can wear mine!" She walked over to her dresser and pulled out a white tank top and some blue jogging pants. When I put them on, I noticed that yet again we matched.
"You know Britt, if we keep wearing matching outfits, people will think we're twins or sisters or something," I smirked. I suddenly saw her face go blank.
"But I thought we already were sisters." She sat next to me on the edge of the bed. As I was staring at her, my eyes moved down to her lips. At that moment I just wanted to lean over and kiss her. I quickly snapped out of the daze I was in.
"W-we are. I mean, I consider you my sister B." That was probably one of the biggest lies I've ever told. Lately I had a hard time thinking of Brittany as a friend, let alone a sister. I could never tell her this though, it would ruin our friendship, and right now our friendship was the only thing keeping me going.
"Good, because you're my sister too." She crawled onto the bed and snuggled underneath the covers. She patted the space next to her motioning for me to lie down. I lay down and turned my back towards hers. Tons of questions ran through my mind. Does this mean I'm a lesbian? What happens if Brittany finds out? Will she hate me? What if I can't control my feelings? I might end up doing something I'll regret. I groaned and brought my knees up to my chest and hugged them. Right now the only thing I needed more than anything was clarity.