I still don't own Chuck. Not sure who does at this point. Maybe Subway.

Sarah needs to keep her promise to Bryce and take Elise down a peg. Unfortunately, Elise can drink like a sailor. Fortunately – Sarah knows how to cheat. Unfortunately, so does Elise. Fortunately… aww you get the idea.

I'll be sure to post warnings on chapters that have violent or sexual situations. I'm going to keep this T – but I might dance on the edge for a bit.

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The Object of Desire

x-x-x-x-x

By the time that Sarah got back down to the casino bar, the guys had all gone to a championship fight over at Caesar's Palace courtesy of one of Janice's supporters. The girls were… well, they were well on their way to being very… relaxed. Actually, they were doing shots in unison. Naturally, Sarah had been trained at the academy to know that there were four distinct personality types of people when they had been drinking and how to deal with them on missions. As it turned out, all four were clearly represented on the team.

One type got introspective and weepy. That was Alex. That frankly surprised Sarah a little. It was probably a sign of low self-esteem. But whatever the core reason, there was nothing to be done for the crier – except let him cry it out. No amount of talking would do any good. If anything, it just made things worse.

Another type got affectionate. Not in a sexy way – not at all - just in an annoying, constantly hugging you and kissing your ear, sort of way. That was Ellie – and even worse, Chuck - in spades. It always had been – and it was a main reason that Sarah seriously monitored his drinking. Make no mistake – Chuck was Sarah's soul mate. She couldn't even describe how much she loved him. But she dreaded being around him when he got like that. Being clung to and having your ear constantly being slobbered on was just not Sarah's idea of a good time. Even the kids had all learned to avoid Dad when he had been drinking or risk getting a metaphorical – and sometimes literal, wet ear. Fortunately, it hardly ever happened because Chuck was a very light drinker. Again, there was nothing to be done with the affectionate type – except perhaps to stay out of his way and hope that he found someone else's ear to kiss.

But that wasn't the worst type. The worst type was represented by Joe. He got aggressive and looked for trouble. Sarah had witnessed that first hand the first week that she met him when he cornered her in the laundry room and made a huge pass at her. It put somewhat of a strain on their relationship for years. That event was still the core reason that Joe and Janice didn't get along some twenty years later. Luckily he learned his lesson from that night and always avoided drinking much. Sarah knew that was the real reason why he didn't come on this trip. He didn't want to be put into a situation where he would be tempted to join the team in a huge celebration. And Sarah had to admit, she was relieved by that decision. She had totally forgiven Joe. He was not only one of her very best friends - Joe was part of her family. She could honestly say that she loved him with zero reservation. And she had received absolutely no indication from him over the years that he would ever again do anything inappropriate – but she still didn't want to be around him when he was drinking. Fortunately, Elise must have sensed as much – because anytime Joe ever had as much as a second drink, she rode herd over him like a Shepard dog over her flock. With the aggressive type, you quickly had a choice to make. You either gave in – or you fought. There really wasn't much middle ground.

The final drinking type got silly. That was actually the most common, which was good – because that was the type that was the most fun to be around. Katie and Heather were clearly the silly type. The only down side to the silly type is that they commonly relaxed their personal inhibitions and did things that they never would do while sober. Sarah knew that full well. Janice had used it against her many times when they were younger. Fortunately, those days were long past. In fact, it was amazing how much Janice had changed over the years. Now Janice was the Conservative Senator. As a matter of fact, Sarah knew that it was Janice that would make sure that nothing untoward happened tonight. She was watching over Katie, and even Heather to a lesser extent, like a mother hen. It was sometimes fun to see how far you could push the silly type and see what outrageous things you could get them to do. Or you could just sit back and enjoy the silliness.

It was good that Janice was on guard duty – and even better that Joe hadn't made the trip, for several reasons. Sarah needed to be free to carry out her plot… umm, make that mission preparation on Elise without worrying about Kate and Heather – and the line of men that were waiting to hit on them. It also helped that Joe wasn't around. It was true that Sarah didn't mind making Elise… well, uncomfortable with Joe. And actually, Joe was going to be the main beneficiary of this plan - but she really didn't want to rub the poor guys face in it.

Typically, Sarah would have run her plan by Chuck first. But the guys had all gone to the fight. Besides, this was a simple plan. What possibly could go wrong?

x-x-x-x-x

Sparky was really torn. It was tough being the only sober one in a crowd of drunken rowdies. And it didn't have to be that way. They would have easily served him. Nobody even questioned if he was twenty-one yet. But he knew there were several very good reasons why he shouldn't drink.

For one thing, he didn't want to reflect badly on Aunt Janice. She had just announced that she was running for President a few hours ago. The last thing that she needed was any publicity of someone who was on the platform with her accused of underage drinking. The press was just looking for any story that could reflect badly on her.

Then there was his new bride. Frankly, she was drinking enough tonight for both of them anyway. That was fine with Sparky. He loved seeing her have a good time. Heather and Katie were giggling so hard for most of the night that Sparky couldn't understand what they were even saying. He actually felt great that Heather was comfortable enough around her new family to let her hair down. It's just that he knew he was going to have to be there for her sometime tonight. That's okay. Heather would owe him a good time – and she wasn't bashful about paying off.

But if Sparky was really honest, the real reason was that he knew that his mom wouldn't approve. Oh, he knew that she would never say anything to him. After all, he was a grown married man. But still…

Besides, Sparky had his own problems. Here he was stuck at this stupid fight. For one thing, boxing wasn't his favorite sport. He would have had a much better time staying with the girls. But that wasn't the real problem. Here he was stuck sitting between Alex and his dad. Fortunately, Alex was really into the fight. That was a little surprising. But, at least, it earned Sparky a welcome albeit brief respite from listening to him crying over how bad his life had been as a teen. Unfortunately it did absolutely nothing about Dad continually hugging him as if he was three… oh, or kissing his ear incessantly.

Sparky had never had a drink before. He didn't even know what it felt like – but anything had to be better than this.

x-x-x-x-x

Elise tipped back the shot of tequila and slammed the shot glass upside down on the bar with a confident air of – well, confidence. "Did Bryce clear him hanging out with Amy tomorrow morning with you?" she asked. The twinkle in her eye told everybody in the bar that she was feeling pretty good about life in general – and especially about herself specifically.

Sarah looked at Elise with a mixture of emotions. Most of her was terribly proud. Elise had really grown over the years. She used to be this sad, almost tragic, little girl who had no confidence and even less self esteem. Now look at her. She was such an amazing woman. She simply exuded confidence. And there could be absolutely no question that she was incredibly beautiful. The fact of the matter was that it was Elise who now turned the most heads. And actually, that was part of the problem. Elise had grown a little too confident. Sarah knew that it was her role as team lead, and more importantly, as her friend to gently – or maybe not so gently – bring her back down to earth. She also knew that her whole plan hinged on Elise buying this next part, so she held her own glass and looked at it pensively before setting it gently on the bar. "He did," she sighed. "I was going to let him take her to Hoover Dam in the car tomorrow. It's too bad."

Elise did a double take – just like Sarah knew that she would. "Too bad?" she asked. "Why is that bad? It's a great idea."

"Amy called," Sarah said. "She thinks that they are going to head back home tomorrow."

"What?" Elise exclaimed. "Why would they do that?"

"It seems that her dad is embarrassed by what happened with you tonight," Sarah said. "I'm assuming that you gave him the drug – and then the antidote." It was pure guess on Sarah's part of course - but the CIA drug that mimicked passing out from drinking had two cures. The normal one, sleeping it off, left the victim with all the side effects of the nastiest of hangovers. On the other hand, the antidote left the victim feeling relatively fine only a very few minutes later. Sarah figured that Elise would want to spare the poor guy the worst hangover that he had ever had.

Sarah could see the gears spinning in Elise's head. "I did," she said as she nodded. "He's really not that bad of a guy. I just didn't want…"

Sarah had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. "I know," she said soothingly. "Don't worry about it. At least, Bryce had one good day. There will be other chances."

Elise was already on her feet. "He needs tomorrow," she said. "That was the whole point. He needs to spend a casual, relaxed, fun day to realize that a girl will like him for him – not because he is romancing her. I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?" Sarah asked – even though she already knew.

"I need to fix this," Elise said.

"Sweetie," Sarah said. "You have to learn. You can't fix everything. Bryce will be fine. Besides, what about our bet?"

"Keep track," Elise called over her shoulder as she walked away. "I'll catch up when I get back. I'm going to talk to Bobby. This is important."

As soon as Elise left, Janice leaned in with her classic cat-just-ate-the-canary look. "What are you doing?" she asked.

Sarah grinned back at her. "Nothing," she said. "Elise likes to feel needed. I'm… Well, I'm helping her."

"You're helping her?" Janice asked incredulously. "Or teaching her a lesson?"

"A little of both," Sarah replied. "Elise needs to lighten up. Don't you think?"

Janice's smile faded… a little. "That's a pretty dangerous game you're playing," she said. "If Elise goes over there to sweet talk this guy – you know how he's going to interpret that. You're also aware that Elise's relationship with Joe is her life, right? She grew from a scared girl into a woman when she met him."

"Wait a minute," Sarah said with a laugh. "You're the one who keeps saying that Joe had nothing to do with that. You can't stand him. Besides, I think Elise is experienced enough to handle one amorous suitor. After all, she's in the big leagues. She'll spend a night peeling his hand off various parts of her body, she'll feel guilty and tell Joe, and he'll use that to get a reward. I confess, Elise feels foolish, gets taken down a peg, and Joe gets a wild night - works for me."

"It's not that I can't stand Joe," Janice protested. "I just don't know him very well."

"I don't see how that is ever going to change," Sarah said. "You won't spend ten minutes in the same room with him."

"Come on, Sarah," Janice said with a growing edge in her voice. "You know full well why that is."

"I know," Sarah said. "And I really wish that you could get over that. It was twenty years ago. I am completely over it. I have been for years. Joe feels horrible about that night. He's really a great guy. If you gave him half a chance, I'll bet that you would see that."

"Is Chuck on board with this plan?" Janice asked skeptically in a clear attempt to change the subject. "He's pretty protective of Elise."

"Why does everyone think that Chuck is the only one who can execute a mission plan?" Sarah asked in a frustrated tone. "I have been a CIA agent for over twenty-five years, you know? I have planned my fair share of missions. Besides – Chuck is drunk as a skunk. I'll tell you what. You go run it by him and see what he thinks."

That got a grin from Janice – finally. "No thanks," she said. "I'll leave it to you to have your ear kissed off. After all, you're his wife. I'm getting all of that I can handle tonight from his sister."

"Umm," Sarah said. "And don't you have your own problems?" She nodded her head in the direction of the three men that were gathered around a giggling Kate and Heather.

"Damn," Janice said as she got up to shoo them away. "I thought that Ellie was watching them. You can't turn your head for a second with those two. They're freaking men magnets. They're worse then you were at that age."

"Me?" Sarah asked in feigned innocence. "Remember those brothers in Atlanta? Speaking of magnets - they followed you all the way back to Washington."

Janice just laughed. "I do remember," she said. "That was a long time ago. By the way, thanks again for leaving me with both of them. I still owe you for that. Just what was I supposed to do with two brothers?"

"You're welcome," Sarah said with her own laugh. "If I remember right, that was a wild night."

"You just be careful with Elise," Janice said. "Speaking of wild nights. She likes to get even. Order us another drink. I'll be right back."

x-x-x-x-x

Elise wasn't gone all that long. That didn't necessarily surprise Sarah. What did surprise Sarah was that she was dragging Amy's dad behind her. But she still seemed in a festive mood. "Hey guys," she said. "You remember Bobby, right? How many shots am I behind?"

"Three," Janice said as she pointed to the bar. "We ordered them for you."

"Janice," Elise said as she tipped up the first shot. "Can you take Bobby and get him a drink? He has some serious catching up to do."

Janice could see in Elise's eyes that she wanted to be alone with Sarah for a minute – so she smiled. "Sure," she said. "Anything for a supporter. Let's step to the bar, Bobby. What are you drinking tonight?"

Bobby thought about it for a second. "Well," he said. "Maybe…"

"It doesn't matter," Janice said with a laugh as she led him away. "Forget that I asked. We're drinking tequila. By the way – did you enjoy the speech?"

As soon as they stepped away, Elise leaned into Sarah. "That was a close one," she whispered. "He was going to leave. I had to do some pretty sweet talking to change his mind. I had to promise him that we would spend some time in the Jacuzzi later. We dropped his suit and a change of clothes off in my room. He clearly thinks that he's getting lucky. It was a struggle getting him out of there as it was. It looks like I have a prom date for the rest of the night."

"Why would he possibly think that?" Sarah asked sarcastically as she shook her head. "Elise, why don't you just tell him the truth? It's not worth it."

"No way," Elise said with a surprised grin. "This is too important for Bryce. It is completely worth it. Besides – I'm still looking forward to seeing you face down tonight."

"Well," Sarah said with her own grin. "You can look forward all that you want – but I think that you might just be disappointed. I'm pretty competitive – and I was doing this when you were still in Junior High School. We still have a bet, right?"

Just then Sarah heard Kate scream. "Uncle Joe," she said. "You made it."

"Crap," Elise said as she looked over in horror to where Kate was hugging Joe. "How is Joe here? He must have decided to come after all. Sarah, you have to keep him occupied for me."

"No way," Sarah said as she shook her head firmly. "There is no way that I'm getting in the middle of this. Abort your mission. Tell him the truth."

"Okay," Elise said frantically. "You can tell him the truth. But I can't abort. This can still work if you just help me a little. Joe will understand - to a point – but if he gets jealous we have a big problem. That would be a huge scene that would draw press coverage. Under no circumstances can he find Bobby's clothes in our room. He'd go nuts. If you can just keep Joe's attention away from what Bobby is doing… Talk to him a little. Maybe dance with him a few times."

"Come on, Elise," Sarah said. "You're asking me to flirt with Joe? Just tell Bobby the truth and end this."

Elise grabbed Sarah's hand. "You don't understand me at all, do you?" she asked sadly. "If you did, you'd know how much I need this. Well, I guess maybe you wouldn't. After all, you're good at everything. I'm… well, we both know that I'm… not good at hardly anything. I'd ask Janice but you know the issue there. The guys are all gone. What's the problem with a little harmless flirting – just until the guys get back? There is no way that Joe would ever read that the wrong way. You're one of his very best friends. Chuck is his best friend. Look… I need your help. Please just let me be good at this one stupid thing. You can still be best at… well, everything else. Bryce needs this… and so do I. Please…"

Sarah looked into Elise's eyes – and saw the desperation. It reminded her of the Elise of twenty years ago – and she immediately felt guilty. "Fine," she sighed. "I'll keep Joe occupied – for a while."

Elise's face showed her relief. "Thanks, Sarah," she said as she squeezed her hand. "I knew that I could count on you."

x-x-x-x-x

Ten minutes earlier – in the hotel lobby

"Elise," Bobby said. "I'm so sorry about earlier. I didn't realize that you were married."

"Don't worry about it," Elise said. "How could you have known? Thank you for being such a good sport about this. He should be here any second."

"Hey," Bobby said with a laugh. "I'm always up for a good practical joke. Especially when it means that I get to spend the evening with such a beautiful lady. How did your husband get here so quickly, anyway?"

"Aren't you sweet?" Elise said. "He was already on his way. Our son is spending the night with a friend. He was coming to join the celebration. This just worked out."

As they were talking, Joe walked up behind Elise and put his arms around her waist.

"Speak of the devil," Elise said with a smile as she kissed him. "Joe, I'd like you to meet my friend, Bobby."

"It's nice to meet you," Joe said as they shook hands warmly. Then he turned back to Elise with a grin. "Are you sure that you want to do this?" he asked. "This is pretty much going nuclear. This is a touchy area for Sarah. She is going to be pretty pissed. She is going to want to get back at you."

The sparkle in Elise's eyes left no doubt as to her mood. "Don't worry about Sarah," she said with a laugh. "She is in the big leagues. Besides, she made her own bed here. She made a stupid mistake. Did she really think that I wouldn't check with Bryce first before I went running over there? She must think I'm still a rookie. She thinks that she can mess with the bull – well, she is going to get the horns."

"Speaking of horns," Joe said. "Just how far are you expecting me to go? I sure as hell don't want her kicking me again. That hurt for a month."

"I seriously don't think it's going to come to that," Elise laughed. "She's going to be the one flirting with you. Just play along for a while. When I give you the signal, we'll spring our trap. Just the thought when she realizes that you're drunk and trying to get her alone… well, that should have Agent Walker wetting her pants. She'll be so relieved that it's a joke that she won't even think about being pissed. Trust me, I know Sarah. She'll never know what hit her."

"Umm," Bobby said. "Speaking of kicking things… Joe, I just want to make sure that you're not going to… umm… misunderstand anything. You're a pretty big guy."

Joe laughed – and slapped Bobby on the back. "Relax," he said. "I'm not the jealous type – at least not on a mission. You're just playing a role. Besides – I'm being most generously rewarded." Then he turned to Elise. "Isn't that right, Lise?"

Elise's light complexion made it very clear when she was blushing – and she most definitely currently was. It was incredibly cute. "Yes, Joe," she said with a pained smile. "We have a deal. Pull this off for me – and you've earned your special reward."

"No limits?" Joe asked with a grin.

"Yes, sweetie," Elise sighed. "No limits."

x-x-x-x-x