Two sides of one secret Chapter 10: Not good in keeping secrets, a grey's anatomy fanfic

Chapter 9:

Mark couldn't manage to say anything. He had no idea what he was suppose to do at that point. He loved the woman in the doorway with all his heart and every so often he'd wished this to happen, that she'd listen to him and that in the end she would knew that he regretted breaking her heart. But now that it had happened he just stood there like a idiot not saying a word and staring in shock at Addison. In some way he was scared because even if she knew about his true feelings there was no guarantee that she felt the same.

Addison was still shocked and waited for Mark to say something. She felt overwhelmed with joy by this sudden revelation. He loved her, well at least Alyssa had said so, but in the end it just had to be true. Although she tried so hard not to get her hopes too high, not to feel overwhelmingly happy she couldn't help but do it anyway. Aware of what it would do to her if Mark led her down once again, she looked from Mark to Alyssa and back still shocked.

"Okay... so now you know..." Mark said slowly, still eying her and trying to read her.

"Maybe you should..." Alyssa started but was interrupted by Mark.

"Yes, I'll let the two of you alone!" he said walking out the door.

"Okay... that's not what I meant...." the girl mumbled, looking at the door when she remembered that Addison, who still hadn't said a single word, was still in the room and now looking at her.

"I don't want you to get the wrong impression. I am not one of those selfish people, who always think about themselves first... I didn't want him to go, I just wanted to suggest, that you two talk alone, only the two of you... that's what I was going to say. But please don't misunderstand me, in some way I'm grateful he left, because of course I want to talk to you, I've waited so long for this moment and yeah.... but even if I want to talk to you, I don't want to be that selfish, you two talking, that's important right now, not this here..." she couldn't stop speaking only because her nerves were getting the better of her.

"Shhh, calm down. It's okay, actually I'm more that grateful about him leaving, because I honestly don't know what to tell him right now..." Addison had found her voice again and made a step towards her sister..

"Oh... are you serious or is this you being all nice and friendly right now and talking to your friends about how selfish I am later?" Alyssa couldn't decide whether to trust her sister or not, too often she'd trusted her parents only to be disappointed by them. And by now it had become some kind of reflex to question everything just so she wouldn't trust a liar.

Addison watched her and raised an eyebrow. She didn't understand why this girl was doubting her. No one had ever questioned her seriousness like that, usually she'd been the one who doubted every word. That was a really scary situation, it wasn't only as if she looked into a mirror, even Alyssa's behavior was the same as hers.

"No, I'm serious. I mean even if I thought you were selfish, it's not like I have someone to whom I could talk about it here in Seattle... well okay there are a few people I could talk to, but we're definitely not that close that I wouldn't call them friends... well... maybe one... or two... but anyway I mean... no, I am not lying to you. I am really grateful that Mark left us alone, seriously." Addison didn't look into her sister's face while she talked.

"Wow... you're talented in trying to explain yourself and looking like a complete moron at the same time... just like I am..." the girl watched her sister fascinated, it was clearly astonishing how similar the two behaved.

Addison stopped talking, for a few moments she just stood there looking straight into Alyssa's eyes. Her look was returned by the girl and suddenly they both busted into laughing and couldn't stop. Addison took some more steps towards Alyssa until she stood right in front of her, still laughing.

"Wow, when they told me you would look like me I didn't expect that we resembled one another that much and especially not in our behavior, but it's really scary..." Addison was still laughing.

"Well... it's really a little scary but also really cool." Alyssa said, who wasn't laughing anymore, the only thing left on her face was a huge smile.

"Yes... so... ehhr... I don't know it's a little weird, you know I used to think I was the youngest in our family and that I had only a brother, but now there is you... I have a little sister that looks like my twin and... it's weird..." she didn't know how to explain her feelings, in some kind she felt some sister bond between them but she though it was insane regarding the fact that she hadn't known about Alyssa until a day ago.

"I guess I know what you're talking about... well to me it's not that strange because I've already seen you once when I was little and I always knew that I have a sister and a brother but still it's weird to talk to you now..." Alyssa smiled comfortingly at her elder sister.

"Mark already told me you've seen me... but when was that?"

"I was about five I guess, it was a family party but I wasn't allowed to stay at home so my nanny took me outside and when you and your former husband arrived I saw you..."

"You saw me and Derek?"

"Yes... you know how irritating it was when Mark told me you two used to be in love? I remembered the man at your side looking totally different, but when I finally saw Derek Mark explained everything to me..." Alyssa grinned.

"What do you mean by 'everything'?" that didn't sound good. Addison needed to know exactly what Mark had told her sister about her past.

"Oh..." even if hearing that Mark loved her made her the happiest woman in the world a few minutes ago, now she would have loved to slap him. What the hell had he been thinking, or had he been thinking at all? She felt so embarrassed, now even her sister, who she knew for about a few minutes, knew everything, EVERYTHING! But something that she'd said didn't make sense, Mark couldn't know about Alex and her one nigh stand.

"Wait, did you said he told you something about me and an intern?"

"Yes... oh shit, he told me not to tell you that..." Alyssa definitely wasn't good in keeping secrets.

"How the hell does he know about that? Why would he even tell you about that?"

"Well... okay I guess now that I already told you that he loves you and that he knows about you and the intern I can tell you... so he told me you two had had this bet, but you lost the bet because you and this intern had sex in an on call room..." she started to explain.

"Yeah, but he told me HE had slept with someone else..." Addison remembered that day quite well, he came down the stairs and she had been walking up them, in the middle they met and she wanted to talk to him, tell him that she slept with Karev and that she was sorry, but before she could say something he'd told her he had become weak and slept with someone else.

"He told you that because he didn't want you to feel guilty, he did that be cause he loved you." she looked Addison deep into her eyes to make clear that it was the truth, that Mark really just wanted to save her from her own guilt.

"Oh my god... he really had been in love with me..." she felt guilty for not noticing that fact, for not noticing how much she had meant to him, how much he'd loved her.

"I wouldn't say he had been, I would say he still is in love with you, present tense."

Outside, right at the spot where Addison had stood to listen to Alyssa's and Mark's conversation, Mark stood now. He could hear every single word of what they were saying, he heard them laugh and talk about how weird it was to meet one another and then he heard how Alyssa told Addiosn what she knew about her.

"Well... everything... you marrying Derek, cheating on him with Mark, getting pregnant with Mark's baby, aborting said baby, following Derek to Seattle to get back together with him, about the prom sex thing and that you called him because you needed sex, the he told me about the bet, about you jumping some intern..." he heard her say and knew right at that moment that Addison would notice what Alyssa had mention jumping into bed with an intern, and he knew she would ask how he'd known it. Sometimes this girl was really annoying, why couldn't she just think about what she's going to say before saying it? Or could she just shut up. The fact that she had given away his deepest secrets was starting to get to him. At first he was really mad at the girl, but seeing Addison's reaction surprised him and the the feeling disappeared.

"I wouldn't say he had been, I would say he still is in love with you, present tense." Alyssa said and Mark could see how Addiosn took a deep breath, although he could only see her back, he knew that it was the kind of deep breath that she always took when she was overwhelmed by her feelings. Suddenly she turned around and Mark could see Tears in her eyes, but he was certain that they weren't tears of sadness but of joy, she was crying because she felt nothing but joy. He'd rarely seen her ever that happy and it made his heart skip a beat. He knew there was still hope that they would get back together, it was so overwhelming that he also had tears in his eyes.

He watched her for some more moments, she hadn't seen him, she was just looking at the floor trying to hide her tears. But then suddenly she raised her head and looked straight into his eyes, she saw him standing a few feet away and it was as if she wanted to show him with her look that she wanted him to come back. Not noticing how his feet began to move, he watched the love of his life until he finally stood again in Alyssa's room.

He just wanted to say something when Addison pressed her lips in his, they felt so soft on his. Again their tongues were dancing together in a perfect rhythm but this time nothing felt like a goodbye but more like a new beginning.