I am back!
This chapter is mostly made up of all the little moments I had floating around my head.
IZ Quote: "But I need tacos! I need them or I will explode! That happens to me sometimes." ~Gir (Invasion of the Idiot Dog Brain)
May sat down on the couch with Gir, Minimoose, and Cal. They shared some Irken popcorn and watched the Scary Monkey Show. Kae walked into the room.
"Have any of you seen Zim?" She looked around and noticed the giant hole in the roof for the first time. "And how did that happen?" She pointed to the hole.
"Some fry cook guy burst in through the roof and abducted him." May said.
Kae stared at them. "How long ago?"
May shrugged. "An hour or so."
"And why didn't you tell me?"
"Scary Monkey Show was on."
Kae walked over to the TV and punched through the glass. It sparked and died. Everyone moaned.
"What was that for?" Cal asked.
"For paying more attention to that" Kae pointed at the broken TV "Than to what was happening around you. May, I expect a full report. Everyone else, make yourselves useful."
Everyone filed out of the room expect May, who stood at attention.
"Exactly 62 Earth minutes ago, an Irken commonly known as Sizz-Lorr broke in through the ceiling and captured Zim. Zim's current whereabouts are unknown."May reported.
Kae sighed. She turned to the other robots who stood in the doorway of the kitchen. "I have to go get Zim. Ris, your in charge."
The red robot saluted.
"Don't answer the door, don't expose yourselves, try not to break anything. I'll be back as soon as I can." Kae walked over to her own base's hanger and entered her Spittle Runner. She then blasted off and aimed her ship in the direction of Foodcourtia.
Kae walked in the door of the restaurant and looked about. People sat at booths eating, an Irken who she didn't know was at the cash register. She didn't see Zim. But she did see Sizz-Lorr.
"Hey, your Sizz-Lorr, right?" She said walking up.
"Yes, I am. What can I do for you?" He said.
"Explain to me why you abducted Zim." She starred him down.
Sizz Lorr growled. "He escaped from me twice now and left me to work two Foodenings all alone!"
Kae looked at him, slightly confused. "What about them?" She pointed to the other workers. Weren't they there with him?
"Well, uh..."
"And two Foodenings? Isn't that forty years, plus the time between? Zim was still in the Academy forty years ago."
"Well, there was this whole time warp thing..."
"But then wouldn't there be two of you? One from the previous time and then the one that went after Zim and went through the whole time thing?" Kae asked.
"I don't know how it works!" Sizz-Lorr exclaimed.
"Well, anyway, Zim and I are in the process of invading a planet, so I'm going to have to ask you to release him."
Sizz-Lorr laughed. "His Pak still has him encoded as a food service drone. He's staying with me."
Kae walked straight up to the fry cook, so their faces were only inches apart. "Listen to me now, because I'm not going to repeat this. I am an Invader and a soldier. I have taken seven planets and two moons. I fought in wars no one else survived. I have on me, right now, three different projectile weapons, two non-projectile weapons, a laser gun, extensive knowledge of the body's weak and painful spots and a licence to kill. Do you really want to mess with me?"
By now, everyone in the restaurant was watching. Sizz-Lorr's eyes had gone a little wider. "Invader Kae." He whispered, just realizing who he was dealing with. A tough reputation sure came in handy sometimes.
Kae rook a step back. "Zim! Front an center."
Zim came running out of the back of the store. He was in his uniform and covered with grease.
"Finally!" He shouted. "I thought you would never get here!"
Kae was still staring at what he was wearing. Large goofy goggles and a huge red hat with a giant yellow 'S' on it, a stained white apron, and a pin of a chubby Irken wearing the same uniform. As Zim moved, the pin spit out grease. Kae could barely even recognize him.
She turned back to Sizz-Lorr. "Do you make all of your employees wear that?"
"It's the standard issue uniform." He replied.
Kae looked back at Zim. "That's just sad."
Giggles were heard around the room and Sizz-Lorr looked a little embarrassed.
"Zim, get out of that."
Zim quickly stripped out of his uniform, so only his Invader's clothes remained. Kae looked him over again.
"What's with the collar?" she asked.
"It will explode if I leave the building." Zim stated.
Kae pulled out her laser gun and aimed it. One quick blast and she returned it to her pocket. Zim pulled at the collar and it broke apart where Kae had blasted it.
"Let's go!" Zim said, almost running at the door. Kae walked behind him, but stopped at a table. There were a few beings of different races. A Vortion, a Cloaky, and a few others.
"Hey, aren't you the Resisty?" Kae asked, a slight evil smile on her face.
The beings at the table broke the window next to them and jumped out of it, running for their lives. Kae snickered, and then continued to her ship.
"Class, you will all be assigned to a younger student who will follow you around for the rest of the day to see how horrible this Hi Skool really is." Ms Bitters said. She then began reading off a list who would be assigned to which younger student.
"Katelyn, you will have Spuddy."
Katelyn thought he was the poor boy Zim had completely freaked out once while walking home from skool [Beginning of 'Megadoomer']. Funny, she didn't think he went to this skool. Must have transfered.
"Zim, you will have Gaz."
Zim smirked at Dib's screams.
"Dib! Stop that infernal noise or I will have you eaten alive by piranhas. You will have Maybelle."
Katelyn tried not to laugh. Dib would have his work cut out for him.
"Now, everyone, go find your pitiful excuses for students and show them around the Skool." Ms Bitters opened the door to the classroom and younger kids flooded in. Zim quickly found Gaz, and both set off. Dib tried to follow them, but Maybelle found him first.
"Hiya!" She shouted in his ear. "You're Dib, right? Cool! Your head is big! Why's it so big? When are we gonna go to lunch? I'm hungry! I want to see the gym. Is it big? Can we go to the bathroom? Where are the water fountains?"
She fired a constant stream of shouted questions in his ear. Not even five minutes in and Dib already looked like he want to bash his head into a wall.
"Are you Katelyn?" A little boy, Spuddy, asked.
"Yup. Come on, I'll give you a tour of the building."
"What happened with Dib? I heard he ended up going to a hospital." Kae asked May. Everyone was back at Zim's base and just hanging out.
"He jumped out a second story window." May answered, with an accomplished smile on her face.
"I will give you this: you have a gift for annoying people." Kae said.
Throughout the day, Zim and Gaz had just found a quiet broom closet to lock themselves in. Kae didn't have any trouble whatsoever with her kid. He was pretty boring. May had caused Dib so much insanity he had jumped out a window.
"Kae, what's a Holobean?" May asked.
"You mean Halloween? It's a human holiday. Zim experienced it once, and it doesn't sound very nice. Where did you hear it?"
"The other students were talking about it. They were complaining that they couldn't wear their costumes to skool because they had to follow the older kids around. Halloweens's tonight."
Zim spit out the snack he had been eating.
"Tonight?" He gasped out. "The Halloweenies! Nooo! We have to prepare!" He took off in the direction of the weapons chamber.
"Ris, what day is it, human time?" Kae asked.
"October 31st, commonly known as the human holiday of Halloween."
Kae sighed. "We're doomed." she motioned to May. "Come on, I'll let you man one of the Death Wave Cannons."
"Yay!" May shouted and followed Kae to the weapons chamber.
It was the night of October 31st, and there was a full moon. Zim's house was barred as much as the Irkens inside could get it on such short notice. The door was boarded up, as well as the windows. Two circular holes were cut into the wall facing the front yard. Both had a Death Wave Cannon's barrel pointed through it. May was at one, Kae at the other. Ris and Cal stood in front of the door, ready to attack anything that came through and protect their masters. Zim stood in the back, quivering slightly. He was still freaked out from his first Halloween. A pile of smaller guns lay in a pile in the middle of the room. Gir and Minimoose were nowhere to be seen. The house was prepared for a battle.
The Halloweenies came out of their homes in search of candy. They attacked the other houses on the street, and the little green house tensed. And soon as the candy-thirsty children began to migrate over to the house. They pounded on the door, and there was a crack as one of the boards on the door broke.
"Fire one!" Kae shouted and May fired her weapon. Kae put her hand on the door, and it became transparent. Both aliens watched the seine outside. Minimoose was jumping through bag after bag of candy. The Halloweenies were running to stay away from him. Kae pointed to the other cannon.
"May, keep watching. If you think Minimoose can't handle it, shoot out Gir. He should take care of them." May nodded and ran over to the other cannon, where Gir was stuck in for ammo.
"See. I told you Gir and Minimoose would make great ammo." Zim said. "Gir attacked the Halloweenies last year."
There was another crack as Dib jumped through a side window. Kae grabbed one of the guns in the piled and aimed it at him.
"You've got to help me!" The boy cried. "It's happening again!" He noticed the weapon. "Your not going to shoot me with that, are you?"
"Relax, Earth-Boy, it's set on stun." Kae rolled her eyes behind the lenses. She was wearing her wig-and-lenses disguise, and so was Zim and May.
"Who's that?" Dib pointed to May.
"You don't need to know. Now, what's happening again?"
"A few years ago, I accidentally teleported myself into a dimension inside my head where they tried to cut open my head to use as a portal into this world! And now it's happening again!" Dib cried.
Kae looked at Zim.
"I told you the story." Zim stated.
"Yea." Kae said, nodding. Nightmare world inside Dib's head. At least it was original.
"You didn't tell me!" May exclaimed.
"I'll explain later."
"Nooooooo!" Dib's hands disappeared. Then his arms, then the rest of him.
"Wow." Kae stared at the place he just was. "Where will he be when he comes back?"
"He could be anywhere." Zim shrugged.
Both aliens turned when hands poked between the boards on the windows, trying to get in.
"May, fire cannon two!" Kae shouted.
There was a blast and then some screams of "It's after my candy!" as Gir attacked the Halloweenies.
"What are we going to do about Dib?" Kae turned back to Zim.
"How about we knock him unconscious and let the monsters in this head get him." Zim suggested.
Kae shrugged. "Sounds like a good idea to me."
Dib reappeared. He was screaming bloody murder.
Kae aimed her stun-gun. "Good night."
Dib looked up. "Wait a minute, what are you- AHHHHHH! ...zzzzzzzzzz..."
Dib's unconscious form disappeared again.
Zim looked at the cannons. "Say, didn't those come with ammo packs?"
"Yup."
"And you removed them?"
"Yup. And it wasn't easy." Kae said, remembering.
Flashack:
Kae and May stand in front of a Death Wave Cannon. A compartment on its side was open. Kae, wearing large protective gloves and goggles, gently pulled out a glowing green ammo core. She walked carefully to May, who was wearing the same goggles and gloves. May held open a box made of heavy metal.
"Carefully... carefully..." Kae said, as she began to lower the ammo core into the box. "No sudden movements."
Gir popped up out of nowhere and screamed, "HI!"
Both aliens jump at the unexpected noise and Kae drops the ammo core. The Irkens yelped and ducked for cover. The core hit the ground. Nothing happened. Kae and May slowly come out of hiding and stared at the core.
"Hmm. Nothing happened." Kae said. "Maybe it was empty."
A rubber piggy fell onto the core. It exploded with the force to annihilate three city blocks. However, in the reinforced room, it only destroyed the room.
End flashback.
"Good thing we ordered three cannons." Kae muttered under her breath.
There were some stomping noises from the back of the house. Everyone turned.
"The back door!" Zim cried.
"You have a back door?" Kae asked. No one told her anything anymore.
Gaz came stomping into the room.
"I hate holidays." She seethed.
Zim, Kae, and May knew enough by now to take a step back. When Gaz was angry, you stayed out of her way.
"What happened this time?" Zim asked.
"My idiot brother kept thinking that everyone was real whatever-they-were-dressed-like and was chasing everyone, and then he started complaining about going back to his nightmare world and begging me to help him. Then I got mobbed by a bunch of little kids who thought my backpak had candy in it. And no one is afraid of Halloween anymore, which just makes it another stupid holiday for people to squeal about."
"I know what you mean." Zim said. Gaz began to calm down.
Kae put her hand on the door again, and it turned transparent. A very bloated Gir sat on top of a mountain of candy. Minimoose was still tackling kids. No one would be getting past them tonight.
"I'm going to the weapons storage. I need to check on the new arrivals." She left the room. Zim followed, as did Ris.
Gaz and May were alone.
"It must be nice to live on Irk. No annoying holidays, anyway. Zim says it's a nice place to live." Gaz said absently.
"Yea? Well you haven't heard my side of the story." May said, smiling. She left the room.
Me: Hello people of Earth! Want to know May's side of the story? Too bad! You have to wait until I publish the next chapter! If you are reading this and I have already put on the next chapter, then good for you. Want to know if Dib is alive or not? You have to wit two chapters! HAHAHAHAH! Now, I would just like to say-
Random Zim Fan: Hi! Grabs Gir and runs.
Me: talks into a walkie talkie Sargent Rankle, we have a runner.
Sargent Rankle: Who'd they grab? Zim, Gir, or Minimoose?
Me: Gir.
Sargent Rankle: I'll get 'em.
Me: Ok, now that that's settled, I want to say-
Lilac Rose6: I'm back! Again!
Me: I thought for sure I kicked you out last chapter.
Lilac Rose6: You did! But now I'm back! Again!
Me: But how? I have securety everywhere!
Lilac Rose6: I came out of the floor.
Me: So you climbed up out of the trap door? Is that even possible?
Lilac Rose6: No! I used the sewers.
Me: Gross.
Lilac Rose6: I know.
Me: Now, to get back to what I was about to say-
Gir: Hi Rosey!
Lilac Rose6: Gir! hugs Gir
Me: Hey, you already had your time with Gir, now kindly put him down before I call security.
Zim: I've come for the robot.
Me: Zim! Now your here?
May: And me!
Cal: Greetings.
Ris: Hi.
Me: Ahhh! So many people!
Kae: What did I miss?
Me: Ahhhhhhhh! runs out of the room
Lilac Rose6: Hey, the author's gone. Know what that means?
Everyone: Wild Party!
Everyone: A giant disco ball comes out of the ciening and music starts playing. Everyone begins to party.
Kae: Remember to review! And if you can say who the head of security is and what his last job was, you might get to come into the author's note of next chapter.
Hey! Found a piece of paper. It's got what the author wanted to say on it. Oh, cool! Listen to this-
Gir: Eats paper.
Kae: Well, so much for that. Party!