Chapter One: No Love.

I would like to say that Los Angeles looks different than it did five years ago. But it doesn't. It's still the same old city: crazy, amazing, and dirty. I grew up here, so I know it like the back of my hand, but this cab driver probably does also. I should tell you what I'm doing and why I'm talking about LA like I haven't been here in five years right? Well, I kind of haven't. I mean, I have been here a couple times. Like, two. That was a while ago though.

Anyway, let me just tell you my life story. I grew up in LA with my older brother and his friends basically. His two best friends more specifically. Aiden Denninson and Ashley Davies. Those three? They were inseparable, like together ALL THE TIME. They still are too.

But yeah, that's who I spent most of my time with. No really, I did. I didn't start getting real friends until my freshman year of high school. I guess you could say that I didn't fully develop or fill out my body until that time. Before then, I was this awkward looking girl with braces, glasses, and a number of weird tie dye t-shirts. Summer before my ninth grade year, I got the metal all out of my mouth, switched to contacts, and drastically changed my wardrobe.

That's when my life also drastically changed. In my freshman year, I had my first and last boyfriend. What can I say? Aiden was sweet and he was easy. Well, not like that… actually yeah he was kind of easy because after me he became the biggest manwhore to ever grace this planet. But he was easy as in, I knew him well, and we didn't have to go through the whole meeting phase. He was my first too, which kind of sucks but what are you going to do? It was horrible by the way. To make a long story short, we were together for five months before I realized my true passion: women.

Yeah, I was pretty young when I came out. So what. I knew what I wanted, and I was going to get it. And I had someone to help me too. Can you guess? Ashley. She'd known that fact about herself for a while, and she was the first person I went to about it. After I had concluded that I did like vagina, I told my parents, and they were cool with it. As for Ashley and me? We didn't start immediately dating like you're probably thinking, but we did become more close than I ever thought we would.

So then I spent the next two years dating a plethora of girls. I didn't lose my "girl" virginity until I met the girl I thought was the one. Her name was Robin Perlman, and we were "in love" for eight months before she popped my cherry. That was at the end of sophomore year, and right at the beginning of summer, she broke my heart. Shattered it really. Like, I didn't know what to do with myself after that. And who do you think was there? Yeah you guessed it again. Ashley.

She hung out with me all summer. She neglected her family, her "girlfriends", even Aiden and Glen. That certainly put a damper on things. But I needed her. She really made me realize that what Robin and I had wasn't real. She did make me realize that what I had with her was real though. But she did that without meaning too.

I really don't want to say that I fell for her that summer. But I would be lying. It started out as a stupid crush. She was older than me, more experienced, and my older brother's best friend. But she was my best friend too right? Friends become more all the time right? That was my though process for the whole summer. Always trying to talk myself into making that move. But I would never, nope, that wasn't me. If she wanted more, she would ask for it, not me. And then one night, she did.

It was the last week of summer. Me and her were sitting very close to each other on the beach, talking. That is what we usually did. Talk. We had gotten so close that we could talk about anything and everything. I loved that. Then she just stopped talking, she looked away from me too. She had never done that before. She always looked right into my eyes when we talked or even when weren't talking. I loved too.

"Ashley?" I asked.

She looked very… pensive. She was thinking, thinking really hard.

"What are thinking about?"

"Kissing you." It was as simple as that. She was the never type to beat around the bush.

"Then do it."

And that was it. I can't really explain how amazing that kiss was. I can't really explain how amazing she was. I also can't really explain how amazing it is that her and I were only together three weeks.

Yeah, three weeks. I bet you weren't expecting that right? The first week of our relationship was great, but then school started, and it just… went downhill from there. You know what? I can't even say we were together, she never called me get girlfriend, nor did we ever talk about what we were. Ashley was… immature about things. Which was weird because she was older than me?

When we were alone, she was okay, she was like she was in the summer. But in school and other places? She was such a… player. I hate to use that word, but it was true.She would constantly flirt with other girls in front of me. And she even told me she fucked some other people when we were "dating".

Needless to say, we didn't work out. Ashley was clearly not ready for the commitment that I wanted from her. And then it was over, just like that. We stopped talking, and I missed her way more than I thought I would.

I spent the rest of my junior year in a blur. Nothing exciting happened, I dated a few girls but none of them ever stuck. Ashley, Aiden, and Glen graduated, and I was all alone for senior year. Well I wasn't really alone I guess. I was head cheerleader, student body president, and I had tons of "friends", but inside? I felt more alone than I had ever before.

After I graduated I chose the college that was farthest away from everyone, but still complying with my parents. If it was up to me I would have moved across the country. But across the state was as far as I could get.

When I moved to San Francisco, I was the biggest loner. Freshman year came and went, and I passed with flying colors. I only came home in the summer for two weeks, and I stayed inside my house mostly. Thank God Glen had moved out by then. My sophomore year of college, I met Chelsea Lewis. She became my best friend, and introduced me to a lot of people. One person in particular. Or girl actually. Her name was Samantha Bradley, and with her I wanted to do things right. So we took things slow, very, very, slow. We didn't become official until about four months after meeting each other. Eventually it was hard to take things slow, and I ended up moving into her apartment about ten months later. And we have been living together ever since.

So I guess this brings us to the present right? Oh wait, I didn't really explain how I got back to LA did I? Well, Sam was at work one day(she works at a coffee shop by our apartment), and I was just sitting at our dinner table on my laptop typing an article for the magazine I worked for(did I mention that I was a journalism major in college?) when my phone rang. It was my brother. Great, I thought. I loved him, don't get me wrong, but he had been trying to get me to come home for a little bit in the summer, because I hadn't been home in a while.

I was really adamant, because I didn't really like LA. That city brought back too many bad memories.

"Hello?"

"Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Baby sis, how are ya?"

I smiled. I did miss him. "I'm great, Glen. How are you?"

"Not too good. I just really, really, miss my little sister. I haven't seen in her in such a long time."

"Glen," I sighed.

"Look, just hear me out okay? Mom and Dad are going on this cruise thing. They're going to be gone for a while, and I was thinking you could come home, and stay in my guest room at my house!"

"I don't know about that…"

"Pleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasee, Spence. Come on. I miss you so much, and this would be so much better than staying at Mom and Dad's like you usually do when you visit, you could stay here, and we could do a whole bunch of stuff, and… just come on! Please, Spence."

"All right. Fine, I'll come. How long?"

"Three weeks would be great right?"

"No, Glen. One week."

"Two?"

I sighed. "Fine."

"HEY! Sam could come too!" That definitely made me feel better about going. Two weeks with my girlfriend in California? That sounded pretty good to me.

That didn't end up working out. Obviously. Because the world hates me. Sam couldn't get the time off work, and she really needs the money so, I was flying solo. Literally.

All right now this brings us to the present right? The cab pulled up to my brother's house and he greeted me with the biggest hug ever.

He carried all my bags upstairs to his room and set them down on the bed I would be sleeping on for the next two weeks.

"So, Spence, are you ready for tonight?" He was really excited about something.

"What's tonight?" I asked, as I started to unpack.

"Oh, I didn't tell you? I'm having a rager tonight! It's about to be RIDICULOUS!"

I rolled my eyes. Typical of my twenty-four year old brother to have a huge party on a Wednesday night.

"Whatever, Glen."

He sat on the bed. "Oh hey, Aiden and Ashley are going to be here. You're cool with that right?"

When I heard Ashley's name, I tensed a bit, but it was gone. I was over her, I had Sam. "Yeah why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know," He shrugged. "Just thought maybe it would be weird with two of your ex's in the same place with you."

"I would hardly call Ashley my ex."

"Yeah, but you guys made out a lot."

"Okay," I walked over to wear her was sitting, pulled him up, and started to push him towards the door. "I'm gonna go take a shower, and relax a bit, k? I'll be down later."

He put his hands up. "All right, All right, I get it. You want me to leave. But you better be ready to spend the next two weeks with your big bro, okay?"

"Yeah, okay, bye, Glen."

He left the room, and I took a deep breath, thinking about seeing Ashley for the first time in five years. I wondered if she looked any different. I wondered if she looked as good as she did when I knew her. Well this should be fun, I thought.