Disclaimer: Don't own CM or Coca Cola, though I wish I had one right now... I'm thirsty!
Author's note: This is a looong chapter... With a LOT of Spencer :D
And special fangz (geddit cause i'm goffik) to my very best friend MorgaineStrange (which isn't her name irl) for beta'ing and writing the passages that took too much thinking – U rok!
"I feel like going out," he had said. Reid had looked at his boyfriend and sighed. Albert always wanted to go out and meet people when he was having a hard time at work. Reid would of course have to go with him so Albert didn't look desperate, but Reid never enjoyed himself and mostly spent the nights hanging on a chair slowly drinking a soda and doing advanced mathematics in his head.
Just like he was doing now.
Albert sat next to him in deep conversation with some lawyer he met through his work. Reid understood why Albert found it so smart to increase his network in a gay-bar – the feeling of 'us against them' was a popular feeling in Albert's line of profession where gays weren't as accepted as you could have wished. But that didn't make Reid want to stay.
"That's very interesting!" The lawyer-guy said and straightened his back. He glanced around and his face lit up. He turned back to face Albert. "I would like to introduce you to some of my colleagues..." Albert looked at Reid briefly and gave him a small kiss before leaving with the other man.
Alone again.
Reid looked down on his Coke bottle and decided that he needed something stronger. He grabbed his jacket and messenger bag and fought his way through the dancing mass on the middle of the dance floor towards the bar. He sat on an empty barstool, put his bag at his feet, and tried to get the bartender's attention which he found was surprisingly easy.
"What can I do for you Love?" a conspicuously dressed young man asked and winked at Reid. He in turn frowned slightly at the feather boa and pink shirt.
"Um... Scotch! I'd like a glass of Scotch," he said and blushed when he realized he'd been staring.
"Coming right up Cutie." Reid felt the blush deepen and was happy the bartender had turned his back to him. He sighed and scratched his scalp.
I just want to go home...
"Here you go Darling." The bartender put a glass down in front of Reid who feverishly started looking for his money.
"I got this one Jimmy." Reid looked up at the man on his left who held a note out for the bartender who grinned and took it.
"Thank you, but you didn't have to do that – I perfectly able to pay myself."
"I don't doubt that you are – you just really look like you could use it." The man smiled and held his hand out. "I'm Tom."
Reid dropped the bag on the floor and dried his slightly sweaty palm in his pants before taking the hand. "Dr. Spencer Rei... Spencer! I'm... My name is Spencer..." Reid hated his tendency to stutter when he was shy and wished to go home even more.
"Dr. Spencer Reid? I read your doctorate on the math behind codes, it was absolutely brilliant! We had great use of it in the development of a security system. The algorithms we used were based on some of your examples. I'm professor in computer science."
Reid looked baffled at the man called Tom for a few moments. "My doctorate has been used for something actually usable?" Tom nodded and Reid felt a smile emerge on his face. "I just thought it was exciting, but that was actually... Wow!" Tom chuckled and Reid felt a slight blush creep back on his cheeks. But this time it didn't feel that bad.
"So what do you do with that brilliant head of yours?" Tom looked inquiringly at Reid and took a sip of his beer.
"Actually I'm a FBI agent, I work with the BAU – the Behavioral Analysis Unit. I'm a profiler."
"... That doesn't really make sense to me I'll have to admit. Behavior analysis is psychology right? What do you use your mathematics degree for?"
The conversation flowed easily and Reid found that he actually enjoyed himself. Tom was intelligent enough to get some of the more obscure comments Reid delivered and he wasn't afraid to stop him when he started rambling.
"So, if you write this sentence for example," Tom scribbled something down on a piece of paper and handed it to Reid, "then you just use the algorithms I just told you about to decipher it and you'll have the original message."
Reid looked at the piece of paper in his hand. Himself a shadow, hunting shadows. He smiled at Tom. "I see you like Homer," he said, and tucked the paper in his pocket. He decided to apply the algorithms later, as he saw Albert approaching out of the corner of his eye.
"Ready to go baby?" The possessive arm around Reid's waist and the look Albert gave Tom made his toes curl in embarrassment.
"It was nice talking to you Tom," he said as he rose. He smiled at the man and wished Albert would stop glaring.
"Likewise. Maybe I'll see you again?"
"Don't count on it." Albert almost shoved Reid all the way to the car before he finally let go of him. The drive back to Albert's flat was quiet and cold. Reid almost asked Albert to drive him home, but decided that it would probably only make him in a even worse mood.
"What did he give you?" Reid cursed inwardly – he hadn't been fast enough. Not because it meant anything special. He fished the note out of his pocket.
"It's just a joke. We were talking about my doctorate and how you can use an algorithm to decipher sentences..." Albert gave the note a brief glance before giving it back to Reid.
"... A joke..." Reid nodded. Albert's silence worried him. A brief glance tot he side revealed a clenched jaw and a scold.
Oh shit...
He had followed his boyfriend even though Albert hadn't even acknowledged his presence. Albert went to the bar cabinet and pulled out the glass and liquor and Reid felt his inside freeze.
"Don't be mad Albert." He stepped closer as he tried to understand what exactly he had done wrong. "I was just trying to have fun so I wouldn't have to be a burden to you. You know I tend to get bored when I go to bars..."
"Well, this time it sure looked like you had loads of fun too..." Albert gave him a cold glare and turned his back on Reid.
"I didn't have that much fun – it was just nice to talk to someone who actually got me when I talked about mathematics." The loud tap as Albert put down the glass made Reid gulp. Albert slowly turned to face Reid who in turn grew pale and started to get sweaty palms.
"Are you saying I'm not smart enough?"
"NO!" Reid's eyes grew wide as he realized he had almost shouted. "No, of course you aren't. But you're not interested in mathematics... Right?" Albert looked coldly at Reid. He leaned against the windowsill with a look of anger and anticipation. Reid took a step in his direction.
"You flirted with a stranger because I find math dull?"
"I wasn't flirting – I was just..." The words was caught in Reid's throat as Albert's eyes lost the hint of anticipation and went to being outright angry. In two long strides Albert was right in front of Reid.
"You deny that you flirted with him?"
"Of course I do – why would I? I love you..." The push was sudden and hit Reid right in the chest sending him straight into the wall behind him. Reid looked at his lover feeling the dejà vu hit him full force. Albert walked up to him eyes shooting daggers.
"Don't you soil those words by using them as an excuse!" He grabbed Reid's wrists and pinned him to the wall. "That is NO way to show me that you love me – IF you love me..."
"Of course I do! I love you so much..."
Albert pulled Reid close and pushed him hard back against the wall. Reid saw stars when the back of his head met the hard concrete behind him.
"DON'T YOU SOIL IT!" He pushed Reid again.
"Please stop Albert," Reid pleaded in a small voice.
Albert shoved Reid aside and gave him a look of disgust.
"Pull yourself together – be a man!" He threw himself into a chair.
Reid bit his lip trying to hold back the tears. The back of his head was throbbing and the grip on his wrists were sure to leave marks tomorrow.
"I'm sorry – I wont flirt with strangers again," he whispered. "I didn't mean to soil our love by being unfaithful to you." He looked down at the floor but heard when Albert rose from the chair.
"See – that wasn't that hard, was it?" He let his fingers slide through Reid's hair. "Now come back to bed with me." Reid nodded and got to his feet – legs a bit shaky.
"Okay..."
The tears slid down across his nose down following the curve under his eye, down his cheek before disappearing into the pillow below his head.
He looked at his hand, tracing the bruisings on his left arm with his right hand's fingers. The recent red and swollen on his wrists and others blue, green and yellow. He couldn't remember the number of times this had happened – no, he could remember the precise number of times, as well as the procedure and the amount of pain inflected – but he wished, oh he wished he didn't remember.
The arm resting on his waist wasn't a lover's embrace anymore – it was a prison. A prison he himself had entered without knowing the terms.
But what was he to do? It wasn't as if he could do any better, and he really did deserve this time.
"Hello there Pretty Boy, getting some more coffee?" Morgan strolled into the small kitchen in search something to do or someone to talk with to get his mind off the increasing amount of paperwork in his inbox.
"Why must you always call me those stupid, degrading nicknames?" Reid shot Morgan a cold glare and emptied his mug into the sink as if Morgan's presence had turned to coffee bad.
"Sorry man..." Morgan frowned at his best friend – this was highly unusual behavior. Despite all the agreements on the team Morgan automatically fell into profiler-mode. Reid's eyes grew wide when he realized.
"Don't you DARE profile me, Morgan! I thought we were friends!" He threw his mug into the sink too and left with an angry look on his face. He went with determination directly towards the men's room and slammed the door after him. Prentiss sent Morgan a questioning look from her desk. He shrugged and went after Reid. Something wasn't right.
Morgan found Reid leaning against the sink so he closed and locked the door after him.
"We need to talk."
"We need to talk," Reid mimicked in a mocking voice. "You sound like a girl – what are we gonna talk about? Are you going to break up with me?" Morgan's mouth fell open as he witnessed Reid's weird behavior.
"Reid, my man – what is wrong?" He took a step closer to Reid.
"Get off my back will you? You had your chance!" Morgan felt a sharp pain in his chest and Reid narrowed his eyes at him. "So if you don't mind." He pushed Morgan aside and reached for the door.
"Reid, wait!" Morgan grabbed hold of Reid's wrist to stop him from leaving. Reid winced in pain and Morgan eased his hold. Realization made his eyes grow wide before anger narrowed them. "Tell me, that's not what's going on!" Reid grew pale and now it was his turn to widen his eyes – the horrified expression on his face was answer to Morgan's question.
"No, don't! Morgan stop!" Reid tried to fight his friend when he started to unbutton his shirtsleeves. "Morgan, of course not! It's not what you think!" Reid tried to push Morgan away, but it was like pushing a brick wall.
"Stop struggling Reid, you'll only make me rip the buttons off." Morgan didn't look at Reid, but kept his gaze fixed on the slender wrist. Finally Reid stopped fighting. He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the door.
A sharp intake of breath was all Morgan could manage when he finally pushed the sleeves away.
The bruising was fresh on the wrist, but as he pushed the sleeve further up Reid's arm he found older and some almost healed bruising.
"He's doing this to you?" Reid opened his eyes and stared coldly at Morgan without saying a word. "Come on Reid – you can't be with someone who hurts you!" The disgust was clear in his voice. Reid pulled his arm from Morgans grip and started to close the sleeve. "Just leave me alone – it's none of your business."
"It is!"
"Oh," Reid looked at Morgan with a look of pure contempt. "And why is that?"
Morgan grew cold then hot then cold again. His breath hitched in is his throat and he felt like yelling or punching something. How could he not have seen? How could he have missed something like this for all of these years?
"Because I love you."
OOOOOOOH! Cliffie!
I always wanted to write on of those...
I'm a baaaad girl ;)
So – how many hate me now?