A/N: Longish stuff? Two chapters per day? Are you in an alternate universe? Maybe.

Also, someone else reviewed! I'd just like to thank them, so THANK YOU!

Interrogation Part 2: Navy

"LAAAAAARS!" The mob member was practically sparkling with excitement.

"Shut up. I'm here to question you, not to chat."

"It's been so long, man!" Dense as usual. Lars was in for a very long day. "How ya been?"

Lars ignored him. "What were you and the other members of the mob meeting about the other day?"

The other man looked at him roguishly. "Ya'd like to know, wouldn't ya?" He winked.

"Mathias. Stop your nonsense. Answer my question immediately."

The Dane leaned back in his chair. "I could..." He jerked forward. "...or we could catch up!"

"No."

"Come on, Lars, don't be such a stick in the mud! How's Eysteinn?"

"Why were you meeting them?"

"Laaars! C'mon, man! How can ya not want to talk to this?"

"Oh, let me count the ways." He murmured.

"Hey." Mathias leaned on the table. "Can ya get me somethin' to drink?"

His Norwegian friend leaned away in distaste. "I can get you water."

"C'mon, man, ya can do better than that!"

"It's not going to happen."

"Boo." Mathias pouted. "Lars, ya can be so borin'."

"I don't care. Answer my question."

"Fine, fine!" The mobster sighed. "We were just talkin'."

Finally, progress! "About what?"

"Oh, ya know, just what we would do if we got caught."

"An escape plan?"

"Yes indeed, involving distractions."

Knowing the man, he wasn't really sure he wanted to ask, but... "What sort of distractions?"

His old "friend" smirked. "Just, y'know, this."

And with that he kissed Lars straight on the mouth.

Time froze. Not because Lars was enjoying the kiss (that was impossible, of course), but because he was too shocked to do anything else. Then,

"DAMN IT! GET OFF OF ME!"

Lars shoved a hysterical Mathias away, hard. He got up and stormed out of the interrogation room, slamming the door.

The remaining man managed to cut his laughter down to sporadic bursts of giggling.

"Haha. Ha. Hahahahaha."

"You gave him wine." Lars said frostily.

Francis cast an amused eye at the man who had just entered the office. "Ah, you're blushing! What happened?"

"I'm not blushing-"

"Mon ami, you are!"

"I'm not your friend and I'm not blushing!"

The Frenchman grinned. "What did he do? Did he kiss you?"

"That's not important! The point is-"

"He did, then?"

"The point is," Lars said, his ears turning red, "You gave a prisoner wine! Firstly, you shouldn't be bringing alcohol to work, secondly, YOU SHOULDN'T BE GIVING IT TO PRISONERS!"

"Was he any good at it?"

"FUCK YOU!" At this, the Norwegian turned on his heel and left.

"It seems I was right." Francis said, smirking. "He really does need to learn something about l'amour."

The door to the interrogation room opened and Lars stepped in, having for the most part calmed himself down.

"Hey, buddy!" Mathias turned in his seat to face the officer. "I knew ya'd be back for more!"

He almost went postal right then, but instead slowly cuffed the Dane to the chair.

Mathias was unfazed. "Wow, Lars, I had no idea you were into that kind of thing."

"I'm not."

Now the criminal was a little creeped out. "Lars?"

"Now, answer honestly." The Norwegian said as he sat down opposite the prisoner, smiling coldly. "Why were you and your little friends meeting up the other day?"

A/N: Me? Ship DenmarkxNorway? Never! And yes, Mathias is rather tipsy. I don't think he'd be stupid enough to kiss his friend otherwise. I hope.