Rin's POV

My world was ending so quickly. How could I tell?

Here I stood, sixteen feet up from the cold, concrete ground on the top of my school's gymnasium building. No one was here to notice me as I hesitated, my feet waiting anxiously at the edge of the tall structure and my eyes looked downward to my destination. There was no one to witness my cries or my screams. No one but the cold and pungent January wind, who would only take it away in the end.

Above me, the clouds covered in such a gray manner, letting themselves cry tears of freezing water instead of the usual white snow; poor heavens. I had lost my ability to cry long ago, so I couldn't bring myself to let loose tears now. Instead, my heart started to grow cold and numb, along with my limbs. My blue orbs- those of which whom have lost their shine- closed, allowing me to think. In the course of a month, I had lost everyone. Mikuo, all my friends, even my dearest brother- I had lost all their trust and everything they had in me.

"It's a pathetic world I live in, with hopes and dreams being nothing but a paper boat floating in crashing waters. At first, you think it'll keep you up and alive, out of the cold and violent waves that start reaching its sinful arms in a desperate attempt to reach you, but then you realize that you were only going to crash anyway, and you had no way out. The boat that you took such pride and faith in was just disintegrating beneath your feet. Then you start to panic and scream as if this wasn't supposed to happen. But we all know that paper sinks. It may float at first, but it always sinks sooner or later.

There were only two choices left: Either just sink in the boat of untrue dreams, waiting for what is- in truth- inevitable, or just jump into the cold and relenting world without hesitation and quickly greet what is awaiting you."

I chose to greet it this time.

How could have it gone from carnivals and love to this attempt at suicide? Easy. It all started with the stupid big mouth of some God Damned person. And their peeking eyes and ever-growing curiosity.

0o0o

On my desk in my own bedroom rested the small journal that had only been recently written in. I had kept it closed, hoping that whoever would mindlessly enter my room- which happens more often than not- would mind their own business and leave things alone for once.

So, with those matters over with, I headed downstairs and into the living room. Len's girlfriend would be over again today, which didn't bother me as much as it once had- even though, mind you, I still felt a small sting of jealousy; I mean, she had gotten the boy that I've always wanted. And speak of the devil, he was here watching tv with a bored expression, his hand running through his hair- note: he wasn't wearing his ponytail. Well, that wasn't the norm.

Inwardly I smiled, ruffling his hair which gave me a grumble in return.

"So, where's Miku?" I asked, curious. You rarely see the two separated.

"She's upstairs, getting a game from my room,"

"Not Grand Theft Auto!" I faked a gasp, getting the idea from our hidden 'twin telepathy'. He nodded, giving me some kind of smirk. You'd never thought Miku-

"Who knew childish Miku liked violent games?" He voiced my oncoming thoughts. I gently smacked him on the back of his head.

"Stop reading my thoughts," I pouted, puffing out my cheeks. Soon after I walked into the kitchen to grab what I came down for: the heavenly orange fruit from heaven. Slowly I peeled off the nasty skin to reach the sweet, juicy core, and threw the peel expertly into the trash can.

I smiled, biting into the sweet treat as I headed back up the stairs, not really thinking but rather savoring the flavor of the orange. On the way up, I passed Miku. At first, I didn't realize anything different- she seemed like the normal, obnoxious aqua-haired girl I knew. So I continued on my way, two steps at a time, and opened the door to my room. Slowly I picked up my journal, not thinking much of it, and started to write about how much of a love sick girl I was.

But now, when I look back on that time in my life, from atop the roof, I remember her eyes. It was so much like mine most of these years, the way they smiled, but continued to hide a dark secret. I didn't realize what she was hiding then... But the door to my room was closed, and I don't ever remember closing my room, which was odd.

And my journal was resting on the floor.

One foot hung over the edge, urging the other to follow with it. The rain was pelting down coldly, probably with the edge of hail. I let my wet, blonde bangs cover my eyes as thunder and lighting flashes behind my back. Normally I'd be running, screaming, hiding, being afraid. But what use was it now, can you tell me? I was ending it all soon enough. Why would a simple lighting strike change that?

On top of the roof
The air is so cold and so calm
I say your name in silence
You don't wanna hear it right now

The eyes of the city
Are counting the tears falling down
Each one a promise
Of everything you never found.

Colorless, shine-less eyes that belonged to me opened once more, taking in what I hoped to be the last glimpse of my surroundings. Grey... it's so fitting.

I frowned, groaning. Sunlight flooded to my closed eyelids, making them turn red and ruining my perfect dream of me and a certain person. My body tossed to the left, then to the right in the sheets, messing them up and unsuccessfully trying to keep the light out of my dream time. And when I couldn't find any sleep, I let out a disappointed growl.

My body snapped up from the bed I was previously resting on, and headed towards the dreaded window. I pulled at the orange curtains to cover the window, the gateway of my opponent, and nodded in approval when the results were one I could live with- the room grew suddenly dim. Satisfied, I climbed back into the bed, closing my eyes and thinking of the aqua-haired boy...

At least, until another source of interruption made my blue eyes snap open, and made a grumble escape my lips.

Beep! Beep! Beep-

I pressed the snooze button that belonged to the annoying alarm clock, whom was public enemy number two, hoping it would shut up. Nothing happened, to my extreme dismay. So I pressed it again. And again, nothing had happened. Not one thing. Slowly I rose out of the bed and from out of the covers, crossing my arms and pouting. What did I do? I glared at the evil machine coldly.

"This is war," I spoke, launching myself at the beeping machine. It wasn't long after the violent punching from me and the screaming from my opponent that the fight had ended. The cursed thing was long dead now, but for some reason I was wide awake. To be perfectly honest, I didn't know who had won. It wasn't important, I finally decided, shrugging.

With a quick change into the school uniform- a gray pleated skirt and white blouse- and with a quick brushing of my bright, blonde locks, I added my signature bow and headed down the stairs, smiling. Into the kitchen I walked, grabbing an orange from the fruit island on the kitchen counter. As I peeled away the skin and bit into the fruit, I started to wonder. My eyes scanned the area, trying to confirm my thoughts. My brother wasn't down here yet, which was strange, seeing how he was never one to sleep in on school days. Well, now that I think about it, he wasn't really one to sleep in at all.

Shrugging off the fact, I picked up my orange backpack and started upstairs. Lazy or not, I didn't want my poor brother to be late to class. My hand reached for the doorknob, turning it slowly to open the pathway into the clean and clearly vacant room. Hmm, this was definitely strange.

"Len?" I called out, heading back downstairs. Looking around, I tried to find as many places as he could be. I was wondering where he ran off to, until my eyes met the red numbers of the electric clock. School started at seven forty-five. That gave me... only a half hour!

"Oh shit," I exclaimed, opening the front door and running outside, slamming it behind me. My legs carried me as fast as I could fly to the city bus stop. Being late normally never bothered me, to be honest. But something else deep inside me bothered me. Why would Len leave me behind so coldly?

He's never done that before.

0o0o

The bus ride was long, but I managed to tumble into the first hour class before the bell that signaled the beginning of the school day. Catching my breath, I led myself to my desk and too my seat. The atmosphere around me was heavy with strange silence and anxiety. Usually the class was goofing off, never quieting until all energy was completely vanished. But today was different. Why did it feel like all eyes were on me?

Things started to calm down once Kiyoteru Sensei walked into the room, ignoring his tardiness and using the silence as an opportunity to get started on today's lessons. Slowly I took out my notes, feeling some relief as the glares started to ease and the tension started to let up. My eyes glanced to the aqua-haired girl beside me, who was acting as if she was into the lesson. The next second, I could feel my phone go off.

To: Rin Kagamine
Subject: Bitch
Message: ): Wtf were u thinking?

I continued to read the message, over and over again. My mind tried to recall what she was possibly talking about. Without getting a single clue or hint, I slowly started to text back, hoping to get answers.

To: Miku Hatsune
Subject: ?
Message: What r u talking about?

I looked to the side of my eyes, watching the girl beside me put her hands under the table, typing away at the buttons with great speed. It wasn't long until I had gotten my reply.

To: Rin Kagamine
Subject: No Subject
Message: Dont go faking it.

By now I was confused. What did I do that could possibly keep her from talking to me? For as long as I knew, Miku Hatsune had been trying to get on my good side for eons. What could possibly change that? Did it have to do with the strange atmosphere only minutes ago? And what about all those stares I had received from the class? I just couldn't fathom my situation here.

"Eh-hm. Miss Kagamine, your phone?" In front of me stood the current instructor, his hands outstretched to take away the device. I looked around, seeing all eyes once more on me. People bent over in a whisper, taking to each other as if I had some sort of disease. I might as well have in this case.

"Miss Kagamine?" He asked again, hand still outstretched. Slowly and hesitantly, I put the device in his hands. I felt like I wouldn't need it for a while, anyway. With it he went, back to the front of the classroom. Even though the attention was laid off me once again, I could still hear the whispers. I kept myself close to my center. Was I paranoid? What the hell did I do? I received no answer. I stared at the board, but nothing made sense. And most of the same happened the rest of the hours before lunch.

Nothing but rumors and distrust.

I could of sworn I heard you call my name, but I couldn't care less right now. You didn't care when I first called your name. You didn't care when I tried to be around you. It was you who ignored me and shunned me in my greatest time of need. Tell me now, Len, why would you care now? Why did you fucking choose now of all times when I needed you- when I wanted you?

You open your eyes,
But you can't remember what for.
The snow will falls quietly,
You just can't feel it no more.

Somewhere out there,
You lost yourself in your pain.
You dream of the end,
To start all over again.

It grows silent again, the only sound being hail, rain, and thunder. Did I really hear you call my name? It doesn't matter anymore, anyway. See, it's too late for me now.

Relief started flowing through me when the lunch bell rang. People had finally gotten up, talking about lunch instead of 'Rin Kagamine'. Yes, I had over heard some of their conversations, though I only managed to get my name, and maybe hints of Len's too? I shook my head, taking the thought away. Now wasn't the time to think about it. Slowly I headed out the door of my fourth hour, heading into the table that my friends and I always sat at. Meiko, Teto, and even Neru were there waiting for me (which is, again, strange since Neru almost never sits at the table).

Slowly I took my seat, looking at my friends whom, in return, gave me only a mixed expression. What it seemed to be was anger, disappointment, and maybe a hint of confusion? I sighed, taking out my lunch.

"So, is it true?" Meiko asked, her elbows resting on the table and her head resting on her hands. She looked almost calm, as if expecting any answer.

"Is what true?" I asked.

"Haven't you heard the rumors going around?" Teto piped in, slightly surprised I haven't heard anything yet, especially since it seems to do with me. I shook my head.

"Someone said that you and Len are together," Neru said in a calm fashion, looking at her cell phone every once and again. What was she doing? Tweeting?

"And did, well, you know," Teto said, making sure no one was listening. I started coughing, choking on the bite of a sandwich that I had just bitten into. Of course it was dang true, but who spilled it out in the first place? Only I knew what happened! Well, besides Len, and my journal. I looked at their faces, each expecting an answer.

I opened my mouth to say something after managing to clear my air tube, but I didn't give them an exact answer. "Who started it?"

They shrugged, all but Mikuo, anyway. I could see him behind my friends as they turned around to look at him. The aqua-haired boy, he was different. The fun loving boyfriend I knew was now hidden behind such a serious face. My blue eyes met his teal ones, and for once, I saw nothing but pain and betrayal in his eyes. And it wasn't a question either. He knew.

"It was my sister who found out you did such a thing," His eyes narrowed. The atmosphere around him was strong as I felt oncoming waves of such a strong emotion. It was just crushing me.

"But Mikuo-"

"It's the truth," that wasn't a question either. I didn't say a thing. I could only turn my head away in such a mix of shame, embarrassment, and regret. Mostly regret. No words escaped my mouth. Nothing.

"I see," he spoke.

I could feel them all starting to walk away from me. They just got up and abandoned me. The first few drops of clear, salty liquid started to fall down my eyes. The pain started to come back in such waves, such spikes and such knives, such poison. I couldn't grab a grip on reality anymore. I didn't care if people stared. I didn't care if they continued to whisper such terrible things about me.

In truth, I was nothing short of a monster.

A beast.

A murder.

It's time to let go. I let myself jump over the edge, leading me down, down, down. I can feel the cold wind rushing into my face and the wind blowing back my hair as I continued my freefall. I smiled, remembering one last thing in this dimension of slowed down time. before hitting the ground like a ragdoll.

When the final bell rang, I didn't know if I could even cheer at that. My face, I managed to fix myself up so I did look somewhat presentable. The truth still continued to spread, but I couldn't care less right now. Up I got from my seat, grabbing my backpack and putting the accursed notes and homework into it. Everyone continued to avoid me like the plague, but I had already grown used to that in a few hours time. Who I really needed to see right now was someone who would stand by me during this time.

I needed by brother.

With some renewed hope, I gathered the pack on my shoulder, walking outside the classroom too look for that one like I always did. I made my way through the crowd, looking in the usual units for his blonde hair, but he wasn't visible. It brought me back to those times. It brought me back when she was first there.

"I could feel my eyes strain to see my brother as I walked through the crowd of students eager to leave the school grounds for the weekend. But he wasn't where he usually waited. Strange... Slowly, I made my way around campus, trying to find the one I usually catch up to right now. It grew easier to focus as the millions of people left, but I still didn't find Len.
My stomach turned. Was something wrong with him? No, surely he was fine. He's never been sick before, and he'd never had a reason to get into a fight. So why did I have this strange feeling something was wrong? That voice screamed in my head to stop looking and go on home without him.

Please! Please just go home!

I shook my head, too stubborn to give up. I couldn't understand why I wanted to go home alone all of a sudden. I didn't expect anything, really. But more importantly, I never expected anything like what I found. By the lockers- that's where my heart shattered into millions of pieces. By the lockers is where I felt my world turn upside down, despite any of my own warnings. By the lockers is where fate decided to reveal its true nature,"

That same voice told me to go home. But I wasn't madly in love with my brother anymore, at least to the point I couldn't move on.

I continued to walk, looking for the ponytail that could only belong to my brother. And when I finally did find him in the classroom of Gakupo-sensei, he was only staring out the window. The cool breeze reached him, and I could see in his reflected blue eyes that something was indeed wrong. My legs brought me to him, where I put a hand on his shoulder.

"What's wrong?" Something was up.

"You," he grumbled, without looking. My heart started to beat faster as I saw tears run down his face in the mirror's reflection.

"Me...?" My voice asked without my mind thinking. His head snapped towards me, bringing even more memories: "Yet at the end of the fight, you could only stand up, and start screaming at me. Your face, it was full of nothing but shame and anger and so many emotions that I couldn't fathom- nor have I seen before- and you sent them towards me. I couldn't understand your words, but I could feel my eyes widen with fresh, burning tears. I realized how much you cared about her...And how little room you had in your heart for me..."

"Why did you tell her?" He half-sobbed, half-screamed. I tried to defend myself.

"I didn-"

"There was no other way she could have found out," He grumbled, walking past me. I could tell- he could care less if he cried. But he came out and said it before walking out the door.

"I fucking hate you,"

The last thing I could feel was my knees taking such an incredible force and the chilling wind crushing down on my chest.. The last thing I could see was the raining sky- the clear liquid turning redder and redder. The last thing I heard was the sickening cracking noise of bones. The last thing I could do was smile- smile at the thought that everyone would be happier now that I was gone. Thunder and lighting flashed the ground around me as my body hit the cold concrete.

Maybe Len would be able to love again with me gone. That thought alone could fuel my happiness.

There's no money. There's no possessions, only obsession. I don't need that shit. Take my money, take my obsession.

Because everything is nothing, and emptiness is in everything. This reality is really just a fucked up dream. With the flesh and the blood that you call your soul. Flip it inside out it's a big black hole. Take your money burn it up like an asteroid. Possessions: they are never gonna feel the void. Take it away and learn the best lesson The heart, the soul, the life, the passion.

And there you have it folks, Chapter 8!
And just to tell you, I spent an hour of homework time of this. I hope you're happy! =D

No worries. This isn't the end. There will be more chapters, so don't think it is the end. =O