Alright so you know how I said this would be the last chapter I lied.. The next one may be short or it may be long.. Either way I plan on making it good. So read this one because the next one is coming shortly afterwards!

"So Santa wants us to deliver the toys to little children across the Lylat system and do it correctly.. I think this is fucking insane!" Whitefur said

"Well come on.. This is Santa. He could totally bail us out of some stuff dude!" Wombo said

"Like what?" Tyronos asked

"I don't know but who wouldn't believe Santa?" they looked at him like he was an idiot but it's Wombo we're talking about here so who wouldn't believe he was an idiot?

"Alright.. Let's just get this done with already and get home. I wanna check out my FaceBook page." Tyronos said

"To the North Pole!" Wombo pointed forward and started the stationwagon up it hovering in the air. Wombo typed in the co-ordinates for Santa's workshop and sped off towards it.

She looked at his face which squirmed and struggled. She wanted to enter his mind and help calm him down but decided against it. She had a weird feeling call it Cerinian intuition but she felt like Fox and Santa were not in the safest spot ever now that Whitefur, Tyronos, and Wombo had left it felt extremely quiet and less secure. She turned around and eyed the room. It was still just them. 'I'm just being paranoid..' she heard a noise which sounded like someone tripped over something. She looked behind her shoulder and gasped at what she saw.

"Guys it is soooooo cold here!" Wombo said to the other two freezing vulpines he was with. The wind was going at about fifty miles an hour and the snow was whipping with it smacking them in the face freezing the fur on their face starting to form ice crystals on their whiskers. The wetness of their noses was also turned into ice.

"Come on knock on the door again!" Tyronos yelled

Wombo knocked on the door and waited for someone to answer the door. They waited for a good minute until a sweet little old lady opened the door. "Hello what may I do for you three handsome young men?"

"May we come in?" Whitefur asked

"Of course of course." She invited them inside and when they were inside she brushed off the snow off of their clothing.

"Thanks ."

"Oh no thank you boys for getting my hubby back to Corneria. I just hope nothing happens at the hospital. I would go check on him myself but I can't drive because I'm just too darn old. But I can still make the boys yell 'COUGAR!'"

They looked at each other a little creeped out by what she said but remembered why they were here in the first place. "Hey we need to deliver the presents while Santa is A.F.K. If you know what I mean."

"Oh yes. You're going to need to haul the presents into your stationwagon because our poor reindeer decided to get a little high while Santa was away." She pointed to the reindeer who were all passed out in their pen. Rudolph's nose was extremely red and it wasn't because it was naturally his color of his nose.

"They must've gotten the stuff from Utah." Wombo said Tyronos and Whitefur both nodding their head.

"So I'll show you where the bag of presents is and the list. Oh we'll also need to get you guys dressed up in his clothing if you're going to pass off as Santa.." she lead them to the wardrobe containing Santa's outfits he had extremely fit and fat suits. She pointed out the the smaller ones made for when Santa wasn't as big as he was now "Oh jeez I remember when he would come back after delivering presents and take me away with his massive gen-"

"Well thank you but we should get going."

"Oh yes don't mind me. Just rambling on about sex."

Whitefur then threw up all over the floor. Tyronos saw the mess and started feeling nauseous and with Whitefur still puking he hurled chunks too. Wombo also spilling the contents of his stomach on the floor as well..

She continued her rant on her and Santa's sex life "I like it when he sticks it in my-"

"Who's there?" Krystal asked. She could swear that someone was there. She left Fox's side to go check out the noise that had her a little frightened. She didn't see anyone there but out of no where a little tiny mouse scampered across the floor. She jumped at the sight of it and laughed for scaring herself like that. "Only a mouse.." she looked back to where Fox and Santa were situated. They looked so peaceful they were able to get cleaned up so that they didn't look beaten up. She sighed and waited for the nurse or the doctor to come in. It was a good five minutes before that happened. The doctor who was a bear came in and looked a little out of place.

"Um.. Hi are you their doctor?" She asked.. She was a little skeptical of him. He didn't look like he was here to cure them..

"Well.. I'm here to take care of them." She searched his mind quickly and found out that he was a hitman sent to kill both of them. She quickly whipped out her pistol from her side and shot the bear. He fell on his back and swore in Russian. He was still alive but dying quickly. She would need to interrogate him there was obviously more to this than met the eye. She put her boot on him keeping him from moving anywhere and pointed her gun straight for his face.

"Who sent you?" She demanded from him

"It won't matter you and those two will die."

She smacked him across the face with the butt of the pistol and repeated her question with more force "Who sent you?"

He chuckled spitting blood onto her boot "The Russians sent those three idiots so we could kill Santa ourselves." she kicked him in the face quickly returning it back to where it was. "Ha! You stupid bitch you will die if you stay here and defend these two. We will come down on you like Thai Hooker."

He disgusted her she laid him to rest by putting one in between his eyes. "We'll see about that."

"So now that we got these presents into the stationwagon we can get the fuck out of here right?" Tyronos asked. They set up the presents so that they would be able to shoot them out of where the Machine Gun Rockets were. So instead of deadly rockets it would be raining presents into the houses.

"Yeah come on Wombo start it up."

"Yeah I gotcha.." He turned the key and they hovered over the frozen wasteland that was the North Pole. "If I heard anymore about their sex-life I would've killed myself."

"I know what you mean. I mean old people sex is probably the grossest thing ever. Seriously I could watch two girls one cup and be fine but hearing that shit is just terrible." Tyronos said

They both nodded their head. There was a rustling in the back. "Hey what the hell is that?"

"I don't know but whatever it is will die!"

"DON'T KILL ME!"

"Bill? The mosquito?" out of the bag of presents came the huge mosquito.

"Hey guys what's up?" He asked

"Dude what are you doing here? It's dangerous for you to be here. It's deadly cold!"

"Yeah but.." Tears started to well up in his eyes "I just missed you guys so much so I followed you guys." He sat right next to Whitefur in the back and eyed him up "Say Whitefur I'm a little hungry do you think I could indulge in your blood?"

"No!"

"Come on! I'm starving!" the mosquito argued

"No! You probably leave bumps the size of soccer balls!"

"So?"

"MY POINT EXACTLY!"

She checked outside the room every so often like twice a minute keeping her hand over the pistol. When the nurse came in earlier and saw the dead Russian bear Krystal told her to get out of the building and call the National Guard to let them know that Fox and Santa were in danger. The National Guard still didn't show up. She didn't know when they would but hoped it would be soon. The Russians would find their way into the hospital sooner or later. She slowed her breathing hoping that it would bring them closer to her and she could make a move. She turned her head and saw a shadow move. 'They're here..' She felt around with her mind to try and find out exactly where they were and was successful. 'Here goes nothing..'

"Why can't I just have a little sip?"

"Because you're a fucking huge mosquito. That's why!"

"Come on Tyronos be a pal."

"NO!"

"You're not fun.."

"Neither are big huge bites on my fucking arms!" Tyronos retorted Bill pouted in the corner and stared out the window.

"Alright guys this should be pretty simple we've got the Machine Gun Present Launcher able to aim at a house and it knows what the gift kids wanted and it will shoot that gift so we pretty much just gotta run through each neighborhood which should only take.. An Hour?" Whitefur predicted

"Alright well shit we can get that done assuming nothing weird happens." Tyronos said

Everything was going fine until they felt something hit the top of the stationwagon.. It sounded like..

"RUSSIANS!" Wombo yelled

"TAKE EVASIVE MANEUVERS!" Tyronos shouted.

"I swear to god if you tell me to do a barrel roll I'm going to bust a nut!" Wombo threatened

"What's a barrel roll?" Bill asked

"It's this!" Wombo said as he performed a barrel roll so perfect that event the old fuck Peppy would be proud of him.

"Don't do that again.. I think I'm going to puke!"

"Sorry Bill but we need to deliver these presents in mint condition or we're going to have extremely pissed off parents."

"Well alright but take it easy!"

"Come you bastards! You'll never take them as long as I live." she shouted to them.

"We only need the fat man!" they shouted at her

"You'll never take him!" She yelled as she shot one of the Russian bears. They growled at her but she only glowed in triumph

"Give us Santa and we'll leave you and McCloud alone! What do you say?" There was a silence and a cease fire as she thought about what could happen..

"Guys these Russians are not letting go! Why do they want to stop us?" Whitefur yelled

"I don't know Russians are fucking weird." Tyronos admitted

"Here we'll give em a little present I made for an occasion like this." Wombo smiled. He reached under the seat and all they heard was a click. "There that oughta keep those bastards at bay."

"What did you do?" Bill asked

"I totally blew their fucking shit up. Look behind you." They turned around to see a plume of smoke and fire in the air to be swept away by the wind like dust under a carpet.

"Well cool.. But.. Uh.. Wombo?"

"What's up Tyronos?"

"There is like four other ships still on our asses and no Slippy to distract them.."

Wombo looked behind him "I guess you're right..'

"What should we do?"

"..We fight till the death!"

Tyronos smacked him across the face "How about we totally annihilate them and stay alive?"

"That works too. Tyronos you want the guns or should Whitefur give them a motherfuckerin HOO RAH!"

"We'll both give them a HOO RAH! As long as you keep this thing steady."

"Can do! Ten Four good buddy!"

"Stop trying to suck my blood you son of a bitch!" Tyronos yelled

"How dare you accuse me of trying to do that."

"Whatever! Just don't distract me!"

"We got two of em coming on the right."

Tyronos looked for them and saw nothing "Come on dude give me something to work with."

"I don't know where they are hitting me from!"

Whitefur looked at a monitor in the back of the Tyronos's seat which had thermal-vision which allowed him to see outside during missions where it was either too foggy or too dark and they were surrounded. In this case it was because the snow was smacking the shit out of the stationwagon making it impossible to fire any of the weapons with a sure-shot. Whitefur yelled "Right beside you on your right Tyronos!" He took aim and it was beeping slowly in steady beats to mark that it was going to lock onto a Russian ship. It bleeped rapidly signaling a lock.

"FIRE!" the rocket flew making it's way towards the Russian ship cutting it's way through the air like a hot knife and butter. It made contact with the ship sending it to the frozen wasteland below. "I got one!"

"We've got three others! Don't get too penisy!" Whitefur said

"Quit quoting stupid one-liners!"

"I'm your father!" Wombo said

"SHUT UP!" Tyronos yelled as he fired another shot missing it flying right past it's intended target. "God damn it guys these Russians aren't going to kill themselves so shut the fuck up!" he took aim at the same one that got away.

"Lock!"

"Fire!" They were done delivering present to the eastern side of the globe when their second enemy had fallen. "Got another one of those son of bitches!"

"We're going to Brazil!" Whitefur said

"Well fuck! I said keep this bitch steady! Unless you want the Russians and Southern Americans to start a war over Santa!" Tyronos yelled

"That'd be sweet!" Wombo said

"My lord.." Tyronos whispered to himself "I got the shot!"

"Take it!"

"Chew on this Comrade!" Tyronos yelled as the rocket shot and followed the Russian "Come on go down already!" it hit the ship it falling ever closer to the ground until it exploded on contact with the hard floor below "That's what I'm talking about!"

"Well we got one left.. He hasn't shot at us this whole entire time though.." Whitefur noticed

"Whatever! He's going down like the rest of them!" Tyronos said as he took aim when he was finally in his scopes he said "I have you now.. Fuck I just did a line.." he shot at the ship which didn't even make an attempt to get out of the way and was quickly destroyed.

"That seems to be the last of them.." Tyronos settled back into his seat enjoying the various places they passed at an incredible speed that would allow them navigate around Corneria in an hour. The author isn't going to do the math to find the exact speed because honestly he's not that much of a dork. But he's writing a story about Santa being saved by the StarFox team or what's left of them. Stupid Command.. The fuck was that about?

They were able to make it back to the hospital without any other Russians attacking them. But when they went back to the room it was empty.

"What the hell.. Did they move Santa and Fox?" Whitefur asked

"I don't know Wombo go get the nurse and see if they moved them." Tyronos said

Wombo left the room. Whitefur and Tyronos searched the room for any clue of what else it could have been. Whitefur looked on Santa's bed and found a note.

"Hey guys the nurse says that some Russians came in and took him." Wombo said panting after running back

'If you three idiots wish to have a Merry Christmas meet us at these coordinates..' there were certain numbers with longitude and latitude that Whitefur guessed lead to Moscow or something in Russia. 'We have Fox McCloud and the blue one.. Ooo She's a fighter.. Better hurry.. With Love From Russia.'

"Guys we have to go!" Whitefur said running out the room

"Go where?" Tyronos asked following him with Wombo not far behind

"This note it says they're in Russia and they've got Santa and Fox and Krystal."

"What? Who's it from?" Wombo asked

"The Russians!"

"Of course! Russians! They're a re-occurring theme in anything good these days! Can't have something good without Russians!" Tyronos said

"There isn't much time!" He stressed they left the hospital rushing to the stationwagon quickly entering it shielding them from the harsh winds and severely cold temperatures "Come on Wombo get it started!"

"It is started!"

"Well let's go already!"

"We're already here!"

"FUCKING A!" they rushed out and there it was..

"Really another Dinosaur Tranny Tuesday? This is ridiculous.."

They shook their heads Tyronos asked Whitefur "So where do they want to meet us?"

"At an Ice bar."

"You mean this place? With Dinosaur Trannys? This is terrible! Why would they choose this place?"

"Because it's where we went the one night.." You should've been there it was nuts. "Come on hopefully this will be short.."

They followed Whitefur into the bar. It was party time for everyone the music was playing something hip and fresh nothing too stupid. It definitely wasn't Ke$ha thank God because white bitches can't rap. The lights nearly blinded them. The different array of colors flashed their faces like drunk white fat bitches at New Orleans during Mardi Gras. The heat was massive considering it was an ice bar. They were dancers in cages feeling themselves up trying to be sexy and get everyone's sexual desire up. Wombo looked at one of them and they looked familiar. He nearly threw up as he realized it was the tranny from the bar in Sauria. It noticed him and winked. That's when he puked on the floor disgusted that the same dinosaur followed them to Russia.

"Come on Wombo we need to find them and get the fuck out." Tyronos said helping him to his feet. Wombo wiped his face with his sweatshirt sleeve and nodded letting Tyronos know that he was fine.

"Sir they're here."

"Bring them to me.."

"Right away."

"Guys I don't know where the fuck we're going to find them."

"Split up we should be able to find them quicker. Report back at the bar in ten minutes." They split up going in different directions of the bar.

"Excuse me trying to get through here.." Tyronos had a hell of a time getting through all the people grinding up on other people. It was truly disgusting. He felt like he was in a porno and was getting double-teamed by two fat dudes. "God damn it.."

Whitefur wasn't having any better luck than Tyronos. He reached the back of the bar and was able to find Tyronos being suffocated by all the people and the lack of oxygen there of. He scanned the rest of the bar Wombo was no where in sight which could be bad. "You're coming with us." he heard and then was punched in the face becoming unconscious.

"Wake him.." he felt a splash of cold water on his face.

"Wake up you piece of shit." he felt a kick to his stomach bringing him down to the ground curling up into the fetal position.

"Leave him be.. He felt that one.. Wake up the other one."

'The other one.. Who is this other one?'

"Whitefur!" Tyronos exclaimed

"Tyronos?"

"Yeah its me.. Where is Wombo?" Whitefur's vision was blurry but he could tell that Wombo wasn't with them.

"He isn't here.."

"Oh he'll join us shortly.. He's currently finding where we hid Santa and them. Now we shall wait while he is returned to us."

'Please Wombo.. Don't fuck this up..'

The faint noise of the music could be heard and felt in the back rooms.. He descended further down the basement finding nothing of interest so far. "Where could they be?" he continued down the poorly lit hallway to find a door at the end of it. He put his ear up to it and could hear voices from the other side. He shut out all other distractions and listened on their conversation.

A man with a heavy Russian accent spoke "So.. Krystal.. You're a telepath right?"

Wombo didn't hear a response from the vixen if she was truly there. "What am I thinking of?"

He heard a grunt of disgust. "Ah.. So you are a telepath.. Too bad your whole planet was destroyed.. Nasty little incident.. Have you ever wondered who did it?"

Once again he heard nothing but could feel the tension rising. "Well I'll tell you who did it.. It was us the Russians.. We hated your planet it was so fruitful and happy.. We blew it up during the Cold war so that the America's would be distracted with that and forget about the arms race which we are still in as of now.. But they don't know that. We were able to distract them and they focused their attention towards the destruction of you planet and any attempt to save the survivors.. But you were able to escape on your own."

"YOU BASTARDS! I'LL RIP YOUR FUCKING THROATS OUT!"

"Oh seems I have struck a nerve.. No matter the Cerinians will be wiped out completely within a few moments.. Too bad.. A rose as beautiful as you shouldn't die.."

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"

Wombo had enough and knew it was his cue to knock the door down and kick some major ass. He stood up in front of the door and yelled "HERE'S WOMBO!" and he kicked the door but only succeeded in knocking himself back. "Fucking door.." he charged the door and knocked it down. Dust flew everywhere blinding the Russian and who was crushed by the door. Wombo picked himself up and dusted himself off.

"Hey Krystal.. Need some help?"

"Yeah.. I do.." Wombo helped her out of the chair she was tied up in. She rubbed her wrists until they felt normal again and didn't bother her. She looked under the door and flipped it over revealing her watch-guard. She knelt down close to him and checked if he was alive by feeling his pulse on his neck. He was still alive. "Come on Krystal we need to go find Santa and Fox. We've got a ride out of here."

He looked back to her to see her beating the snot out of him. "Krystal! What are you doing?"

"TAKE THIS YOU RUSSIAN PIECE OF SHIT! HOW DARE YOU!" He tried to pull her back but only succeeded in getting hit in the face by her. "WE DID NOTHING!"

"Calm down bitch.." A calm voice said "You'll join your fallen brethren soon.." She turned around to see two Russians pointing their guns at her. "You won't be able to get revenge dead.. Co-operate and you may be able to get your chance."

She knew that much was true "Fine.. But you'll be the first to die."

"I can't wait.."

The Russian smacked Wombo in the forehead to wake him up because he was knocked out from her wicked ass punch. "OW! YOU FUCKER!"

"Come on.. Our boss needs you alive.."

There.. Chapter what is it.. Twelve? Yeah that one is done.. See ya later.. Rate and Review if you feel like it all that good stuff. Peace!

-Womboman