[A/N] So... here's the next chapter. It's quite long -- our longest chapter yet. But we didn't want to split it and figured that people don't usually complain about long chapters. So... yeah! A special thanks to my wonderful reviewers: Paulmcco, Photographwall, xxMOONandPAWxx, cafin8sodaa, Fun-Sized Kirk, SWPants1986, and RavenclawLupin11. And also thanks to everybody who has added this story to their favourites or alerts list. Your reviews and acknowledgements inspire us to keep writing. Anyway, I'm sure you want to get on with this.

Disclaimer: As much as I would love to own these characters, or at least have them to talk to and cuddle with... I don't. I don't own them or have them. My sister doesn't have them, either. That's all Jo.

Chapter 23: Snapshots of Summer

"Out of the darkness, into the light

Leaving the scene of the crime

Either I'm wrong or I'm perfectly right every time

Sometimes I lie awake, night after night

Coming apart at the seams

Eager to please, ready to fight

Why do I go to extremes?"

-Billy Joel, I go to Extremes

1 July

Remus,

I don't know how to begin. I really just wish you'd let me explain in person. Merlin, Remus, that is so typical of you. You always just run away and leave me behind all drunk or paralyzed or something. Please just let me come see you. I came over the other day, but your parents didn't let me come in. What? You could tell them not to let me see you, but you can't even bring yourself to say that you're in love with me? What is that?

That is… you are still in love with me, right? Oh God, Moony. Just let me see you. Please.

-Sirius

3 July

Prongs,

I just got back from Heather's. Mate, that was the most terrifying thing I've ever had to do. It was even worse than when I thought we were going to be hung by Filch our first year for marauding after hours. Anyways, her parents were really nice. Well, her mum was. I'm not sure whether her dad likes me or not. He didn't talk much and kept giving me these hard stares kind of like Professor McGonagall gives you and Sirius when you try too hard to look innocent. So I'm not sure what that was about.

But I'm pretty sure her mum likes me. She was a really good cook, much better than my mum, and kept trying to give me more food at meals – like I need that! They didn't let me stay in Heather's room, though. Which makes sense, now that I think about it. But it seemed quite unfair at the time. But we had more than enough alone time to, well, you know. So I had a good time.

My mum also met Heather at the station. She says she's a really nice girl. So, that's good. My mum also said that Heather could spend some time with us later this summer. So if her parents will let her, that will probably happen.

Anyways, what have you and Padfoot been up to? Are things okay with him and Moony? They were very not normal the second half of the train ride, but neither of them has said anything to me. I thought you might know.

Don't get into too much trouble without me, please.

Mischief Managed,

Wormtail

5 July

Moony,

I love you. I'm sorry about the last letter being so… I was frustrated. It's been five days since the thing on the train and you still haven't written me back. Maybe I'll just have to explain in writing.

The thing is, Moony, is that Will Greggor is a complete slut and I would never have anything to do with him. He just threw himself at me. Couldn't resist the old Sirius Black charm, you know what I mean? In all seriousness though, the creep just appeared in the compartment and started coming on to me.

Please, write me back. I love you.

Yours forever,

Padfoot

12 July

Dearest Heather,

I love you. I miss you. I miss your soft skin, your beautiful blue eyes, and your contagious laugh. I miss everything about you. It's only been a week since I visited, but that's too long. Please let me know if you can visit here. I don't think I can survive without you another month.

Your devoted,

Peter

15 July

Maia –

Hey, sweetie! How is your summer going? I hope you're having fun and not missing Kinsley too much. Find some other guys, okay? Because you're worth it. And come visit me! My sisters have been asking for my "funny haired friend" to come visit. I can only imagine it's you because Lily is the "pretty girl with pretty hair" and Kate is "the one who acts like a boy."

Anyway, enough with the formalities. I know you really care more about what happened when Josh came over. And then when I went to his house. My entire family liked him. Actually, I they may have liked him more than me. He and my dad got on great. There was much reminiscing about being in Ravenclaw (I felt a bit left out, then) and then talking about really advanced transfiguration. I mean, I know that I am good at transfiguration, but not on that level. My dad started giving Josh all sorts of career advice. I thought he'd be super bored, but he seemed very interested.

I was so nervous when I went to meet his family, Maia. I was so sure that they wouldn't think that I was good enough. Apparently they've all been Ravenclaws for years. And here I am, a lowly Gryffindor. Of course, I don't really think that, but their dinner conversation practically shone blue and bronze. It was scary. His older sister works in experimental charms. Apparently she's one of the top in her department after only a couple years. I can't even tell if they like me now. I just felt so inferior. They kept talking to Josh about his plans and I realised for the first time, really, that he's not going to be at Hogwarts next year.

Maia, I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know what I'm going to do without him there. It's so much different than with Remus. Yes, I loved Remus, but not like this. And him not being there is going to be so much harder than it would've been just a week ago.

Yes, that means what you think. Yes, I am blushing furiously right now as I write this. Yes, it was painful. But it was also very nice. Very, very, very nice. I will have to tell you more when I see you. I don't think I can explain it properly in a letter. I'm not even going to try.

But I'll change the subject back to you now. Write me as soon as you can! I want to hear all about what you've been doing. And, please, let me know when you can come visit me. I'm lonely here without you guys and without Josh. Stupid boy started working as a clerk in the Department of Mysteries last week. Oh dear, there I go talking about Josh again. My bad! I'm sorry!

Okay, I think I've rambled enough. Write back! I love you!

Allie xx

16 July

Peter,

Thanks for the lovely letter. You're so sweet. I love you and miss you, too.

I talked to my mummy and she said that it will be fine if I visit you. But only for a couple of days. My family wants me here, I guess. I'll send you an Owl when I know what dates work.

Yours always,

Heather

17 July

Dear Remus,

It's been over weeks since I've seen you and I feel like part of me is missing. I was an idiot. I told him 'no' numerous times and was about to hex him, but he threw my wand on the ground. I'd never been in a situation like that before and I froze up. It was a nightmare. One second I was alone in the compartment and the next he's standing over me and trying to seduce me. I told him that I was with you, but he didn't seem to get it. Then, next thing I know, his hands are down my pants and my brain just dies and I'm sitting there like I'm in a coma.

That's when you came in. All of a sudden everything flashed into motion and I shoved him away, again. I saw you and… I woke up.

I love you so much, Remus. I always have. I mean, I'm no James and you're no Lily, but you've had this special part of me as soon as I met you on the train with James and Peter. James and I clicked right away and Peter was alright too, but you… even in my stupid eleven-year-old brain, I knew you were special. When James and I figured out you were a werewolf, I knew that I couldn't let you be alone through that. In our 3rd year, when I made the biggest mistake of my life and betrayed you, that was the only time I ever considered killing myself. When I first realized I was gay, in fourth year, YOU were the one person I really needed to tell. You were the one who had to be okay with it. I didn't even care about telling anyone else (besides James, who figured it out on his own) until a year later. It's always been you and it will continue to always be you because…

I sound like such a sap, but the thing is, you complete me. I could never cheat on you. The thing with Will Greggor… I don't even know what that was. But you've got to trust me. Because, while I'm a stupid, rash, overly hormonal teenage guy, I'm your stupid, rash overly hormonal boyfriend and if you don't forgive me, I might just do something stupid, rash, and overly hormonal.

Please, I'm begging you, write me back.

Yours,

Sirius

23 July

Dear Maia,

I'm confused.

The strangest thing happened to me last night. I don't know how I feel about it. I feel like I should want to send James an angry letter telling him to stay out of my life, telling him exactly what I think of his arrogant self, telling him that he is every kind of horrible I could ever imagine. But I don't want to. This is Potter, Maia. James bloody Potter.

I'm sorry. I'm being confusing. I know I'm being confusing. And I know that if I just sign off this letter here you'll hunt me down and kill me. So, I'll just tell you what happened.

I was sitting in my room last night reading a new article on experimental potions (don't laugh). I was home alone; my parents had gone out to do their traditional first Friday of the month dinner and movie date and Petunia was out with Vernon (I still don't understand that one). So, I was sitting alone in my room reading and wishing I could be hanging out with somebody and thinking about sending a letter to somebody when I heard a loud crack. An apparation type crack.

I live in a muggle neighborhood. The only thing I could think of was that Death Eaters had come to my house. I'm sure you've been keeping up with the news. There have been so many stories of attacks on muggleborns and their families. I grabbed my wand and looked out the window. The streetlamp in front of my house was burnt out, so I could hardly see anything. But then I saw the silhouette of a person standing underneath my window.

I was so scared, Maia. I could hardly breathe. I didn't want to announce my presence in case he hadn't seen me or let him know that I knew that he was there. I was frozen in place just staring out my window.

"Oy, Evans?" I heard a distinctly familiar voice call up. You get one guess as to who it was. Who else calls me 'Evans'? Who else would show up randomly in the middle of the night outside my window?

"Potter?" I called down in a whisper.

"Oh, hey! You are up!" he said back, "Peter said you might be asleep by now, but Sirius told me to give it a shot."

"Potter?" I repeated. I could not believe it. Why was he at my house? How did he even know where my house was?

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Just thought I'd pay you a visit," he answered. "You mentioned in your last letter that you were going to be home alone tonight. Though, Evans, you probably shouldn't say those things in a letter. What if it had been intercepted? I could be a Death Eater."

"You thought you'd pay me a visit?" I asked incredulously. And, yes Maia, before you have a conniption, I had written him a couple times. He initiated contact, though, so don't get too excited. I know how you feel on this matter. And I don't want to go into it here.

"Yes," James said. "Though, now I'm starting to think it was a bad idea. I suppose I could just go. I'm sorry, Evans." He pulled out his wand to prepare to disapparate.

"James!" I called down. What inspired me to do this, I don't know. But I did it. And I kept talking. "Wait, it's fine. You don't have to leave. I was just kind of surprised and a bit relieved that you weren't a Death Eater."

"You were glad it was me?" He asked, putting his wand away and smiling up at me with that cocky grin of his.

"I didn't say that," I said, crossing my arms. Though, Maia, I was kind of glad. Not that it was him, but that it wasn't a Death Eater. I'll take Potter over a Death Eater any day. I know, at least, that he won't try to kill me.

"You do wonders for a man's ego, Evans," he said.

"Your ego is fine."

"You would say that."

We stood in silence for a little bit, him looking up at me from near the rose bushes and me staring down at him through my open window. I now realise how this would probably look to an innocent and ignorant bystander. But, at the time, it didn't seem that odd. Other than the fact that Potter was standing outside of my house. That was (and still is) odd.

"So, Evans," James said after a couple minutes, "Are you going to invite me in?"

"Oh! I'm sorry. Hold on just a second." I shut my window and hurried out of my room and down the stairs. I opened the front door to let him in. He was just standing on the front step, that cocky grin still on his face, his hair all messed up as usual. And it was then that I realised, for the first time, that I was wearing old plaid pajama pants and a purple tank top. Not my best colour. And I cared. Why did I care, Maia? When have I ever cared what I look like for James Potter?

"Sorry, I'm in my pajamas," I mumbled, embarrassed. "I didn't know you were going to, you know, just show up."

"It's fine," James assured me. "I think you're beautiful no matter what you are wearing, Evans."

"Whatever," I answered. "And I thought we were on first name terms now."

"Well," James said slowly, running a hand through his hair, his smile fading a little, "I'm never quite sure where I stand with you."

"I think if you have the nerve to show up uninvited and unannounced at my house in the middle of the night, we better be on first name terms," I snapped, crossing my arms across my chest and staring at him angrily.

He ruffled his hair, messing it up even more than it had been before.

"Why do you do that?" I asked, still glaring at him.

"Do what?"

"Mess your hair up like that, like you think it looks cool to have just gotten off a broomstick. Your hair doesn't need any help looking ridiculous. It does it all on its own."

"I don't do it to look cool!" James exclaimed.

I was pretty relieved that he ignored my comment about his hair looking ridiculous. It really doesn't look that ridiculous. It almost looks… Well, it doesn't look ridiculous. But that's beside the point.

I raised my eyebrows at this. Who was he trying to fool? Of course he does it to make himself look "cool."

"Well," he pressed on, "Maybe I did it for that reason at first. But then it just became a nervous habit, something to do when I don't know what to do with my hands."

"James Potter, nervous?"

I laughed and he just kind of looked at me for a minute. He looked thoughtful, as though he were deciding what to say and whether or not to say it. I must have been staring back at him with an expectant look on my face because, after a bit, he sighed and started to speak.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Act like I'm this horrible guy? Why do you do that, Lily? Yeah, I know I've been a prat, especially through fifth year. But I was just a kid! And you haven't exactly been the perfect person either."

"I don't know what you mean," I insisted. But I did. He had a point, reluctant as I was (and am) to admit it.

"I've been nothing but nice to you this year," he continued, choosing to ignore my statement. "And sometimes you're nice back to me, like we're friends. And when we're friends, it's fun. I like spending time with you, Lily. And not just because I'm a lovesick little kid. Because I like you. Because you're all sorts of amazing and I could list all the reasons that I like you for hours, and I wouldn't finish.

"I know that I'm the only person you act this way with. And I just don't get it. Sometimes you treat me as a friend, as an equal. But so often you're just so willing to jump to conclusions and make judgments about me. You don't really know me that well, Lily. How can you claim to know my motives when you don't take the time to get to know me?"

"I… I don't know…"

I didn't know what to say. He was standing there on my front step, his hands shoved into his pants pockets, staring at me intensely, demanding answers to questions I didn't have answers for. Because, again, he was right. I didn't know him. I don't know him. I treat him like he's the boy that hexed Snape for fun when so many things he's done have shown otherwise.

"Well, think about it," James said quietly. "I know you're a good person. And I'm really not half bad myself. Just think about it. And if you can come up with an answer, tell me. Because it's no secret that I like you, that I've liked you for ages. But I'm close to just giving up, even on being friends with you. If we have no chance of even being friends, I need to move on. This isn't good for me and it isn't good for you."

"James," I said, equally quietly, "we are friends. At least… I want to be your friend."

Why did I say that, Maia? What on earth possessed me to make me say that? I've been so against being his friend, his anything. And, then, he's standing there telling me that we maybe can't be friends and I panic. I realise I do want him as a friend. I want him in my life. No, I'm not in love with him. I don't like him. But… I can't imagine my life without him in it anymore.

"Well, think about it," he repeated. And, pulling out his wand, he disapparted, leaving me standing in my doorway in my pajamas.

And that is why I should hate him. That is why I should send him an angry letter telling him to leave me alone. Because I shouldn't want him in my life. I shouldn't want him as my friend. Everything I have thought I've known, felt, thought for years is in pieces. And I want to be friends with James Potter.

Your distressed friend,

Lily

23 July

James,

I want to be friends. I'm willing to try to be friends. Friendship is a two way street, and I owe it to you to meet you halfway.

Lily

26 July

Remus,

I'm writing to you as a last resort.

It was not until recently that Sirius told me what exactly transpired between the two of you, choosing rather to, in classic Sirius style, moodily stalk around the house, sit in quiet, and occasionally throw things. Both my parents and I have been worried about him but he refused to say, even to me, what was on his mind. The only time I remember seeing him this downtrodden and worryingly discontent is when Regulus was sorted into Slytherin and began fraternizing with the future Death Eaters.

But, I digress. I do not write to tell you about past events of which I'm sure you are fully informed. Rather, I ask that you allow yourself to be fully informed about this situation before you continue to draw conclusions and place judgments.

I trust that what Sirius claims is true. He cannot lie to me; I believe him to be fully incapable of it. I know that you feel that you have cause, due to past events, to not completely trust him. And I can understand. There was a time when I, too, felt that he had betrayed my trust beyond repair. But that is in the past. If you hold any remnants of that incident in your heart now, let it go. Just as you wouldn't want Sirius to hold your condition against you, I know he would not want you to hold his childhood mistake against him.

Sirius is my best friend, my brother, my other half. Surely you understand this. Watching him hurt pains me. If you do not listen to him, really listen without predisposed doubt, I will be forced to stand by him and him alone. Remus, this is not an ultimatum. This is fact. I cannot do something I feel is wrong or turn against a friend I know to not be in the wrong.

You know Sirius. You've been involved with him for several months and you've known him as a friend even longer. Don't let your doubts about him, about yourself, get in the way. Do what you know is right.

I sincerely hope you consider what I've said.

Yours,

James.

30 July

Dear Lily,

I hope this isn't breaking any invisible lines between us boys and you girls, but I figure if James can get away with visiting you in the middle of the night, then I can get away with writing you a letter. Mind you, this letter may turn out to be ridiculously informative. See, I just needed to tell somebody and I realized that you would get this better than the Marauders. Besides, they're on the inside. They were involved in this whole twisted mess. You know all involved parties, but you're a bit more... unbiased. And I just need somebody to tell, a way to get this out of my head.

It all happened after you walked in on us on the train ride home. Sorry about that, by the way. After those sentimental and tear filled goodbyes with the heads and prefects, I hurried back to the compartment hoping I would still have some time with Sirius before James and Wormtail decided to grace us with their presence again.

When I entered the compartment, I saw that Sirius was not alone as I had hoped, but rather with that Ravenclaw Quidditch player, Greggor. They were behaving in a way that probably would've made you blush the color of a Wide-eyed Dillypink. Well, I lost control and stunned the prat. Not Sirius, Greggor. I just put Sirius in a full body bind. Not one of my brightest shining moments: I ran away.

He sent me countless letters for about two weeks, but I couldn't bring myself to read them. I guess we're two of a kind, Lily. Remember what you were saying about needing to prove yourself because you felt like people would think less of you if you weren't perfect? Well, I feel like that too sometimes. I guess I always thought that I wasn't good enough to be with Sirius and I kept expecting him to find somebody better.

Then I got this letter from James and… he said he wasn't giving me an ultimatum, but he was. He's a good guy, Lily. I really do hope you give him a chance. Anyways, his letter was… strong willed to say the least. That boy and his moral fibre. Seriously.

That night, after I had just read the letter from James, Sirius appeared at my window on his motorcycle. You've probably heard him talk about it before. It's the one that can fly and that I always said he loved more than me. He looked a real mess, his hair was unbrushed and windblown and he was just in jeans and his faded leather jacket. He'd obviously just thrown on whatever he could find. Yes, fine, I thought he looked positively gorgeous, his chest shining in the dim light of night. But that's beside the point, I was still mad at him.

I, keeping James' letter in mind, opened the window to let him in. However, I live in a partially muggle neighbourhood and the motorcycle couldn't very well just hover outside my window until Sirius was done explaining himself. I regret to think about how cold I was to him when I got on the back of that bike. I wouldn't even wrap my arms around him to keep from falling off and ended up barely staying on by sheer force of will.

He flew me away, and trust me, if you knew Sirius as well as I do, you would've been worried for your safety as well. Luckily, we just ended up at the edge of some forest. Then he explained that he and Greggor were nothing and that he only ever loved me and… he even started throwing things at one point. I could tell he wasn't lying. Maybe it was when he almost started crying, that I knew he was telling the truth. Honestly, in the six years I've known Sirius, I've only ever seen him cry once before.

At that point, we made up rather enthusiastically. I feel really ashamed now, of how I acted on the train. I can't believe I let myself lose control like that, I mean, you know me: I'm cautious. I'm the responsible one. I'm careful and think before I say or do. I guess it's just something about Sirius that helps me let go. I hope you find somebody like that someday, but be careful, once you do, you won't be able to give that person up for anything. Just the few weeks in which I was resolutely unforgiving I almost caved numerous times. And not caving was one of the most painful things I've ever done.

Now, I wish I had. I should've at least read the letters. I have read them now, of course (because it's not as if I had the heart to throw them away) and they were mind shifting. Persistent people can do that, shift minds.

Wow, I feel incredibly self-centered, now. Tell me about your summer, tell me about you. I can't believe I've lived in the same castle as you for six years and I know hardly anything about your life. Mind you, I know some random facts thanks to James' strange and mildly stalkerish qualities. But, Lily, you are a beautiful person. And, really, after this letter, I would love to know how you are doing.

Your friend,

R. J. Lupin

5 August

Lils: Boys are stupid. They say that we blow things out of proportion. All I did was tell Caleb that Puddlemere United was a stupid team and he shouldn't waste his time trying out for them. Somehow he twisted that into me saying he was worthless. Which I didn't. I didn't even insinuate that I am a better Keeper than he is. Even though I am. He's just being stupid, saying how hanging out with the Ravenclaw 7th years last year made him feel stupid and how I'm not helping matters. Well, he chose to hang out with them. And he seems to think I said something bad about Hufflepuffs as a whole. I mean, Rob was in his house a year ahead. My own brother is a Hufflepuff. Why would I say anything bad about them? So now he won't talk to me or answer my Owls. I like the kid. A lot. But I want to smash him over the head with a Quidditch goal post right now. Merlin!

Kate

PS: Maia told me about the James thing. Whoa.

PPS: This letter got caught under some other parchment and I forgot to send it. So it's now a week later. I got an Owl from Caleb. Apparently he's sorry. We're going to play Quidditch tomorrow. Boys are still stupid, though.

7 August

Dear Lily,

Are you having a nice summer? I need advice and Peter was being ridiculously unhelpful about this particular issue.

See, I have a crush on this boy and I don't know what to do about it. I mean, do I tell him or is that too forward? I mean, I've never even kissed a boy before. What's it like? I'm thirteen... is it weird that I've never kissed a boy?

Sorry if this is awkward, it's just, you seem so smart about these things, I mean, how long has James Potter liked you? And I can't ask mum about this stuff because it would be even more terribly awkward. I'd ask Rachel, but she'd probably laugh at me.

Xoxo,

Helen

10 August

Lily, Allie, and Kate,

Because this is huge news and I need all of the help I can get, I'm making three copies of this letter; one for each of the smartest girls I have ever met. I'll get straight to the chase: I saw Kingsley and we hooked up. Well, we were in a bookstore, so we didn't completely hook up. Okay, that's it. I'm going to have to explain better, aren't I?

I was bored out of my mind one day, because all of my friends were busy fighting with boyfriends, losing their virginities or getting visited late at night by James Potter. I decided, what better way to distract me, than to go shopping? I flooed to Diagon Alley all by my lonesome and decided to hit the book store. Don't worry, I was simply going to get some trashy romance novels.

Anyways, I got to Flourish and Blotts and couldn't find the book I was looking for. I wanted to look around anyways, though, so I didn't ask the shopkeeper for help. Instead I wandered aimlessly into the back rooms of the store, where, I saw him. He was wearing the shop uniform and so I asked him:

"You work here now?"

He grinned as though he was really happy to see me and told me: "Yes, I'm trying to raise some money so I can pay for Auror training." Then he continues to ask, "So, does this mean that you're willing to talk to me?"

I, being the naïve person I am, smiled and shrugged. "It's not like I hate you. Besides, I'm over that whole thing. I understand why we wouldn't've worked out," Only I'm sure I said it a bit more eloquently at the time. Forgive me if I don't get this right word for word.

"You do?" He asked me. This part I remember word for word. "I'm not so sure I remember my reasoning."

He said that and my heart did that familiar swoop it always used to do. I should've known right then and there that I was a goner. But, again, me and my naivety.

"Well, I remember," I said. "But it's okay. I'm ready to be friends, if you're still interested."

He said he was and we stood there and smiled at each other like mutually confused preadolescent sweethearts. It was one of the most awkward moments of my life. Luckily, I spotted the book that I had wanted. As soon as I picked it up, he asked what it was, and I embarrassedly told him. He laughed at me and all of a sudden we were chatting and bantering about literature like old friends. I felt really proud of myself, you know? Like, damn, I'm strong enough to just be with him and not break down or anything.

That was when I looked at the time and realized that we had been talking for over an hour. It's funny; I hardly remember the talking part. Then, I stood up to go, because somehow, we had ended up sitting on the floor, surrounded by books. I say to him, "Shouldn't you be working?" and he tells me, "Oh, I got off about an hour ago. I was supposed to go over to Josh's house to hang out. I guess I forgot."

Then I'm feeling all guilty about stealing him from Josh, but also kind of giddy about having the power to make him forget about his best friend.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" I exclaim. "Do you think he'll be mad?"

Kingsley laughs and says no, because apparently Josh would be with you, Allie, and he wouldn't miss Kingsley one iota. That's when Kingsley says, "Remember that double date we went on with those two?" And we're laughing about how awkward you two had been at first.

Really, though, Allie, did I ever know anyone as oblivious as you? But I digress.

He then says: "I only wish I was as lucky as them now."

I'm of course, thinking, 'what the hell, you're the one that broke my heart, remember?' but instead I just smile awkwardly and say "Well, um, bye then."

But I don't leave. I like being around him too much and, well, I don't know when I might see him next. I resolve to leave and give him one last hug goodbye. But after we hug, I'm still in his arms and somehow we're kissing and… it's amazing. Fireworks just like there were before. I'm too busy not thinking that I don't even notice that I'm getting poked in the back by the bookshelf he has me pushed up against.

Then I ran away. Was that stupid? Not just the running away thing, but the entire big stupid thing? I feel like a slut or something. He just has such an effect on me. I guess I'll always love him though. He was my first everything that matters and I just… needless to say I relapsed into a puddle of tears the other day.

Thanks for letting me explain this to you girls. Just writing it down made me realize something though. He was my first love and I think that even though I'm always supposed to love him in a special way, he really is just my first love. I'll be okay.

Now just tell me if you think I'm stupid, yeah?

I love you girls. Thanks for reading this whole goddamned long letter. My hand is seriously cramped up now. Thanks again. By the way, we seriously need to get together. How about a picnic!? That would be groovy. And maybe we can flirt with some cute muggle hippies, yes? Or… well I can. You all have very special wizards in your lives, don't you? Oh wells. I'm happy with the concept of muggle hippies.

Peace,

Maia

13 August

Dear Helen,

You definitely are asking the wrong girl, but I'll try to help anyways. I'd say you should probably tell him. The worst that can happen is that he doesn't feel the same way and then you feel embarrassed for a while. That actually doesn't sound too pleasant, does it? Well, it'll be a growing experience no matter how he takes it. And if he doesn't like you back, then he's a stupid nincompoop, because any boy would be lucky to have you.

And kisses… they are very nice. I rather enjoy them, myself.

I wouldn't worry about it too much, though sweetie. You are still young and have plenty of time to deal with boys and kisses.

I'm glad you wrote to me. I've been worried about you this summer what with what happened at the end of term. How are you doing?

Sincerely,

Lily

16 August

Dear My Fellow Marauders, Messers Wormtail and Moony,

Our very own Padfoot decided that today was the day to inform my parents that he is a homosexual. We were all sitting around the dinner table and he cleared his throat to make an announcement. My Dad, of course offered him the water pitcher, but Sirius took no heed. He then informed the two of them in no uncertain terms that he is gay.

My mother nodded, smiled and passed him the potatoes while my father chuckled, and said something along the lines of, "You're in love with that Lupin Boy, right?" Sirius nodded, blushed and accepted the potatoes.

noDon't you worry, though, Moony, my Dad is well aware of your first name.

Just thought that little anecdote might brighten your day.

Mischief Managed,

Prongs

p.s. Moony, Padfoot told me to say sorry for not being with you on June's full moon. Apparently, just because you didn't want him to be there, didn't mean that I shouldn't have been there to help you through it. I apologize, but luckily you forgave our black canine friend, so I swear to never leave you alone on a full moon ever again as long as I live.

17 August

Allie, Maia, Kate, Remus, James, Sirius, Peter, Helen, Heather:

OH MY GOD YOU GUYS YOU WON'T BELIEVE IT!

I was made Head Girl! I'm so excited! My parents were so proud. They're making me a special dinner. I'm so excited! Remus, are you Head Boy? I hope it's you. You'd make a great Head Boy.

Sorry for the mass letter. I am too excited to write it down so many times. I think I'm going to burst from happiness!

Me! Head Girl! I didn't expect it in a million years! Me!

LOVE AND KISSES TO YOU ALL!

Lils

NEWS!!!! BIG NEWS!!!

OUR VERY OWN PRONGS GOT A LETTER IN THE MAIL SAYING THAT HE IS HEADBOY!!! IS DUMBLEDORE MAD?!?!

I resent that. I think I'd be a fine Head Boy, although I'm befuddled by the idea that it's not Remus. I take it back. Of course Dumbledore is mad.

Prongs stole the quill. But, anyways, I have it back now. We always knew he was mad. When was there doubt in our minds? And Remus, I personally have mixed feelings about you not being Head Boy. I mean, I always wanted to say that I gave head to Head Boy.

Ew. Really Padfoot? Yes, I'm laughing, but I doubt our innocent Moony would not appreciate such ill humor.

Innocent? Ha. You've always been a funny one, Mr. Prongs. So, yes, Prongs has accomplished the unaccomplishable. He is Head boy and Quidditch captain and… God, just when he was getting progress with Lily, his head will suddenly become so big that she won't even be able to see him.

First of all, progress? What progress? You're as mad as Dumbledore. Besides, it's really not a big deal. I would prefer it if nobody commented on this at all, in fact…

That's true! We should have a celebration! Tomorrow, the Potter Estate. Bring cake. Think about it, boys, with James as Head Boy, we're pretty much free to do whatever we like! Friends in high places. It's good stuff.

Please, Sirius, don't make this difficult for me. Moony, I think I can finally appreciate how awful it must be to be a prefect in our midst. Think maybe you could give me some pointers?

Nope. He's my boyfriend. He will be helping me. Anyways tomorrow

There is no need for cake, but of course, as always you are welcome to come and be merry in a completely not celebratory fashion.

Love,

Sirius

And James, but a bit less love. No offence Moony… and Wormtail.

25

Lily,

Why are you the wrong girl to ask? Is it because you and James aren't together yet? I think he'll catch on to the fact that he might have a chance with you soon. You two would be the best couple in the world.

I guess, you're right about time. I'm young and I don't need to rush anything. I'm just curious, you know? I guess I knew that kisses were nice though, I mean, why would you kiss somebody if it wasn't nice?

I'm doing fine. I mean, I've had a couple bad dreams and some bruises and Rachel was really upset at first, but we're okay now. I'm really glad that all the boys got there to help on time and that you came and calmed everything down. Thanks for that. And thanks for your advice. You're super cool.

I guess I will see you on the train, then, this weekend. Congratulations on being Head Girl!

Xoxo

Helen

[A/N: So? What did you think? Which was your favourite letter? Also -- there is a companion fic to this chapter. It's Lily/James centric. We couldn't figure out how to fit it in here, but I had the bunny. And, you all know how bunnies work. You have them and then you really don't have a choice -- you have to write them. So, please, go over and check it out and let me know what you think!

Love and kisses!

Liebe]