Strip Snap by Lilachigh

Author's note: Oooh, getting complicated! Glad you are enjoying this.

Chapter 20: The long journey

It was dark now in the basement. The bulb in the overhead lamp had flickered and gone out. Buffy let the shadows flow up and over her body, welcoming them as fore-runners of the night she knew must come for them all very soon. It was a long time now since Xander and Willow had left, since Anya had secretly handed Buffy the dividing rod. A long time since her friends had betrayed her. And there was no sign of Dawn. Was that another betrayal? Somehow she didn't believe that, but Dawn was just a child. The others were bigger, stronger, adult. What was more, Dawn thought they were her friends.

'Dawn is not a child. She is of our blood. She is near.' Spike's voice echoed inside her head, but it was fainter now and she hadn't heard William speak for some minutes. Demon was still alive; Buffy could feel him pulsing in her veins, a heat, a passion for life that caught in her throat with its power.

'But not here,' she replied sadly. She reached out with every nerve in her body, trying to sense her sister, feeling the link to the shared blood that coupled them together. 'Spike – '

'Sweetheart?'

'Is William - ?'

'Sleeping, pet. Very tired. We need – '

'I know what we need! Oh God, I can't stand this. Dawn!' She flung the name out into the dark but there was no reply.

Sighing, she sank down again onto the floor, cradling Spike's cold body in her arms. She reached out and pulled William and Demon closer as well. So, this was it. The day, hour and minute she'd been waiting for since she was fifteen. She found herself smiling. It wasn't how she'd imagined the end would be. She'd died twice already but, if she was honest, she couldn't remember much about it. There had been water the first time, of course. And fire and falling the second. This time –

"You're not dying, Slayer!" Spike's voice cracked through the mists that were beginning to gather inside her brain. "We might be, but you'll still be alive!"

Buffy ignored him. She refused to go on alone; go on without him and William and Demon.

"Buffy! Bloody hell, woman. Listen to me. You can't just die because we do. Think, pet. We want you to live!" Spike sounded frantic and from somewhere far away, she could feel William waken, weakly questioning, adding his pleas to Spike's. She simply shut out their voices. She was going with them! Refused to be parted. She'd spent her whole life putting other people first. This time she was going to be with those she loved. Through death and beyond. She'd decided.

"Buffy! Buffy!"

No, she wouldn't listen! She screwed up her eyes as tightly as she could, twined her fingers around Spike's hands and waited.

"Buffy! Wake up! Please. Jeez, how can you go to sleep at a time like this?"

With a moan, she flicked open her eyes. She knew that voice, had to reply to it, even though she didn't want to. "Dawn! I wasn't so much asleep – I was – thinking. You came. You heard us."

"If you count nasty squeaky things in my head voices, then yes, I did. How did you do that? There was you, and Spike and William and Mr-I-Haven't-Washed-for-a-Century, all talking to me at once."

"Why are you whispering?"

Dawn glanced over her shoulder, her eyes wide and scared in the gloom. "Xander and Willow – they didn't want me to come down here. They took me to get pizza. I said I needed the bathroom, then wriggled out of the window and ran all the way back. But I don't – " she hesitated, "I don't understand, Buffy. Is it because of Demon? Why are they trying to stop me talking to you?"

Buffy gently laid Spike's slack body onto the floor and stood up. "Dawn – listen – I'll explain later. It's – complicated."

Dawn rolled her eyes at her sister. "You mean it's about sex!"

"What? No! I don't mean that at all. Well, it's a bit about sex. It's about how Willow and Xander feel about me and – listen, Dawn. We can't do this now. You've got to help me get the boys back into their bodies."

Dawn reached through the bars and gently touched William's pale, still face. It felt like ice. "I thought they'd be back by now. It's too long, Buffy, isn't it? They can't just – live – in you like this."

Buffy nodded. "I wanted Willow and Xander to help, but they wouldn't. No! – " She flung up a hand as Dawn's face turned ugly. "We can't get into it now, Dawnie. They'll have to wait. They're not important: Spike, William and Demon are."

"Okay. But Buffy, don't forget what they've done when everything's back to normal because I won't. Now, what do you want me to do?" Dawn stood up very straight and with a flick of her wrist, tied her long hair back in a tight knot. Buffy found herself smiling; her little sister looked so grown up, so ready to fight any battle put in front of her.

"I think the dividing rod thingy should take them out of me and put them back in their bodies. At least, Anya gave it to me, so she obviously thinks that's what will happen."

Dawn's eyes got larger and larger. "But Buffy, you didn't use the rod when it first happened; you just – sort of took them. Can't you just – sort of give them back?"

Buffy shook her head, wishing she could find the strength she needed. The boys' voices had fallen silent now. Were they alive? She was sure they were because she knew, without knowing how, that the pain she would feel if they went would overwhelm her.

She realised Dawn was still waiting for a reply. How long had the silence lasted? With an enormous effort, she dragged her brain into action, forced her tongue and lips to move. "I can't do it, Dawn. I don't know why. But I can't unclaim them. All I can do is use magic to get them back inside their bodies. But I can't turn the rod on myself. It has to be done by someone else. And the only person who can help is you." She handed Dawn the rod, then frowned and snatched at her sister's wrists. They were bleeding from a myriad of cuts. "What the heck?"

"Told you – had to climb through the bathroom window at the pizza place. What I didn't tell you was that I had to break the glass first! Don't fuss, Buffy. It's only a little blood. You've seen far worse."

Buffy's lips thinned and she had to fight down the surging questions that rose inside her as the boys sensed her distress and Dawn's pain. Perhaps they weren't quite so close to death as she'd imagined!

Dawn clutched the rod in both hands, her knuckles white with pressure and anxiety. "I've just realised, I don't know the spell," she whispered.

"We do. We'll say it, you repeat it and keep the rod pointing at me. And Dawn, don't drop it. No matter what happens, no matter if Willow or Xander arrive, or I scream, or fall down or start singing nursery rhymes, keep the rod pointing at me until I tell you to stop."

"OK – Buffy – "

"Yes?"

"What about Demon? If – when he goes back in his body – will he be all demony again? Will you be safe in there with them?"

Buffy felt a smile curve her lips. "That's why I'm staying inside the bars, Dawnie. But I'll be OK. He won't hurt me. We're – we're together. All of us."

Dawn felt a shiver of envy run through her. Buffy's face looked, jeez, the only words she could find were 'peaceful', 'serene'. As if she'd come to the end of a very long journey and was basking in the warmth and comfort of her own home. She couldn't imagine ever feeling that happy, that secure. All those feelings had been shattered on the night she discovered her true identity. Oh, she'd got used to telling people that she understood, that it was what you were now that counted, not what you came from, but she knew deep inside that what she'd once taken for granted had vanished. That rock solid foundation of family, parents and unconditional love had turned into bright green shifting energy. There was nothing to rely on, no real support in her world. So yes, she envied Buffy now but threaded through the envy was a skein of joy because she was the one they had called for, the one they needed. In some weird way, she was part of them as well. The blood link between them would not be denied.

"Are you ready, Dawn? We need to hurry."

She nodded, her gaze never leaving Buffy's face.

Buffy turned her mind inwards, searching for the boys, asking for the spell she knew William would remember.

"William!"

"Miss Buffy?" The reply was faint; he'd almost gone.

"I need the spell to put you back in your body. I know you have it."

"So tired…"

"William! Try – please. For Spike and Demon. For yourself. You have to tell me the spell."

She let herself go slack and slowly at first and then faster and faster, the words came pouring from her lips. Dawn repeated them, louder and louder as she fired the dividing rod and the air crackled and broke. Buffy felt a surge of pain flood through her and she gasped, swayed and sank to her knees, her hands spreading to touch all three bodies. She moaned and twisted – there had been no pain when she claimed them. Why did it hurt so much now?

Dawn grasped the rod tighter and repeated the spell over and over again. The agony on her sister's face was dreadful to look at. "Buffy!"

"Don't…stop….don't…you….dare….stop!"

Dawn was crying now; tears rolling down her cheeks unheeded as Buffy screamed and collapsed on top of Spike's body. Somehow – and Dawn would never be able to explain how even to herself – she managed to hold the rod pointing at her sister for another minute before she flung it aside and sank to her knees, clasping the bars of the cage Xander had built what seemed a lifetime ago. Buffy felt the agony ease slightly. Under her face she could feel the smooth cotton of Spike's t-shirt. It smelt of him. She could feel the buckle of his belt digging in her stomach, the rasp of his jeans against her legs. If she didn't open her eyes, she could have been in his crypt, teasing him, flirting with him, eager to let him do whatever he wanted to her. If she didn't open her eyes, everything would be OK.

Gently, slowly, she turned her mind inwards and listened. There was only silence. The boys had gone. She felt bereft, abandoned, which was ridiculous because that meant they were back inside their bodies – didn't it?

"Buffy - did it work? Are you OK? Are they – back?"

Buffy eased herself off of Spike and just then, William stirred, rolled over and sat up.

"William!" Dawn's shriek pierced the gloom of the basement. "You're back."

"I think…Miss Buffy….yes."

Buffy smiled in relief. If William was back, then surely Spike and Demon had to be as well. But they were still lying there, not moving. A chill scuttered over her skin. Frantically she called for them inside her head, but no one answered.

She stared round the gloomy basement wondering why in such a normal, everyday place, her life was on the verge of finishing. Outside the bars of the cage Xander had built to keep Demon under control, everything looked so ordinary. There was still a pile of laundry waiting to go in the dryer, a clutter of paints and cardboard on a table where Dawn had been making something for a school project, pipes gurgled and chugged across the ceiling and a draught of cold air blew down the stairs from the open doorway.

Yes, just an ordinary basement, except for a cage, her sister clutching the bars outside and the three men she loved most in all the world struggling to live! William's spirit had gone from her body back into his own, but although Spike and Demon had gone from her, too – and she could have cried at their loss - their bodies lay still and silent.

"Spike! Demon! Answer me. Oh god, please answer me." Buffy called again inside her head, her lips moving in silent anguish. William had rolled over and was sitting up, leaning against the cage bars, holding his head as if in pain. But at least he was alive and there. The other two still lay on the ground, motionless. Buffy knelt between them, frantically patting Spike's face. "Come on, Spike! Come on. You're there, I know you are. You're not dead. I won't allow you to be dead."

"Buffy…" Dawn's voice was faint and worried.

"Not now, Dawnie. Please." She bent over Spike's body and cupping his face in her hands, pressed her lips to his. They were icy cold and for the first time ever, there was no response to her kiss.

"Buffy…" Dawn forced the name through her lips. She'd never imagined, never believed she could ever feel like this. The world was spinning around her and she reached out blindly for the one person she trusted to make it all stop.

"What?" Buffy spun round, almost snapping the word and then stopped. Dawn was kneeling outside the cage, but as she'd fired the dividing rod at Buffy, she'd stretched her arms inside the bars. Now she was staring at her sister, her eyes huge in her pale face.

"I feel – odd – weird. As if – Buffy, I think they're inside my head. Spike and Demon. I can't – oh no – oh, it's horrid. Make them go away! Buffy!" She fell writhing on the floor, clutching her head, her long dark hair flicking back and forwards as she rolled across the floor.

Buffy gazed at her, dread and understanding beginning to appear on her face. William rubbed his fists childishly into his eyes, like a small boy wishing he could wake up from a bad dream. "Miss Buffy, they are inside Miss Dawn. I can feel them there."

Buffy left Spike and Demon and crawled out of the cage. She wrapped her arms round her sister's body and rocked her in her arms. "Omigod. Dawn, I never meant for that to happen. Sshh, sshh, I'll sort it out. Lay still, Dawnie. They won't hurt you. They'd never hurt you. They love you."

Dawn gave a shudder and clung convulsively to Buffy. When she spoke her voice was thready and very young. "I know they won't hurt me, but Buffy, it's – it's so horrible. They're – inside me!"

Buffy swayed with the conflicting emotions that crushed through her. Relief that Spike and Demon weren't dead, there was still a chance of saving the man she loved, but a vast pity and anger at what Dawnie was experiencing. Dawn was too young for this – she was still a virgin! This feeling of being possessed, that someone, some things were inside you was more than a violation. How the hell had this happened?

"William?" She turned imploring eyes on the vampire whom she liked but did not love. "What do I do now?"

He crawled across the cage and took her place next to Spike and Demon, gently pulling their bodies closer to him so their heads rested on his knees. The tight platinum curls and greasy hair were stroked with identically tender actions. "Miss Buffy, I think you have to fire the dividing rod again, this time at Miss Dawn. Somehow they were transported into her. Some of these magics seem very unpredictable. But Spike and Demon must return to their own bodies – at once. I only just managed to hold on and they are both now very weak."

Buffy clutched Dawn tighter as the teenager writhed in her arms. "Why is it hurting her so much? It didn't hurt me when I claimed you all – in fact – " she hesitated and then at the look of encouragement on his face, whispered, "It was marvellous. I felt - fulfilled. Complete."

William looked through the bars of the cage at the two sisters, his blue eyes darkening. "I'm not sure but I would imagine possession like this is only for those who have a deep, intimate involvement. Miss Dawn is too young, too innocent. She cannot accept them in the way you accepted us. This wasn't a choice she made willingly; this was thrust upon her. She may not want to fight in her head, but her body tells her otherwise."

Buffy reached out and picked up the rod, staring at it suspiciously. "I wonder how much power is left in this thing? Could I hurt Dawn, damage her some more in some way?"

William shook his head. "I know nothing of such things, Miss Buffy. But of one thing I am certain – if you do nothing then Spike and our Demon brother – they will die. Indeed, it may already be too late. But if you use the magic you could save our brothers and kill Miss Dawn."

"What?"

William looked up at her, the face Spike's, the expression of loving pity etched on it was all his own. "I cannot tell you what to do. But whatever it is, do it quickly, please. I can hardly feel Spike and Demon."

Buffy put the dividing rod down on the ground. How could she possibly fire it at Dawn? The power generated could kill her sister. Who knew what difference her magical beginnings would make if she absorbed all that energy.

Dawn had stopped tossing and turning; she was curled up in a ball, whimpering, great shudders convulsing her body. Holding her tight, Buffy reached out with her mind. All three had claimed her, she had claimed them back. They were one. By touching Dawn she could reach for them, feel Spike once more; experience that wonderful sense of love and belonging. Then Dawn gasped and Buffy stopped.

No, she couldn't! Even to say goodbye, she couldn't enter Dawn's poor mind and make things even worse. And she knew, with a surge of despair that she couldn't risk Dawn's life for her own gain. Soon Spike and Demon would be gone and Dawn would recover.

"Buffy…" Dawn raised her head, her dark eyes pools of pain and hurt.

"I'm sorry…I've let you all down…I just can't…."

Buffy hushed her. "You've let no one down, Dawn. I'm proud of you, what you've done tonight. Just lie still. It'll….it'll be better soon. I promise." She hugged her sister to her, unaware that tears were splashing down onto the teenager's face.

Dawn struggled round and sat up. What she was experiencing was scary, dreadful, she wanted to die, but the sight of Buffy crying was far more terrifying. "What do you mean? Why aren't you using the rod thingy to get them out?"

Buffy tried to sound calm and in control, even though she was screaming inside. "No, I can't. I don't know what it'll do to you. This shouldn't have happened, but it has, so we've got to – well, just wait."

Dawn grabbed her hand. "Wait for them to die, you mean?"

Buffy struggled to keep her face and voice under control. There was no way she wanted Dawn to feel any guilt. None of this was her fault. She'd come when they called; she'd helped without question or complaint. Buffy felt a flood of anguish course through her. No it was Willow and Xander who were to blame. The so-called friends who'd walked away, left Spike and William to their fate, condemned them.

"There's no choice, Dawnie. I can't risk your life."

"You made me risk yours!"

"That was different."

"No, it wasn't. Buffy – don't make me the reason Spike dies. Nothing will be the same again if you do that. You know that's true. We've lost mom, I lost you for a while and now you're back but don't make me lose Spike, now. It isn't fair!"

Buffy found herself trying not to smile. The adult words had ended with a wail of teenage anger. But whatever Dawn wanted, however right she was in some ways, however desperately Buffy wanted Spike back, she knew she couldn't risk her sister's life.

She picked up the dividing-rod and was about to turn and hand it back to William, to get it out of harm's way when it happened. From under the long curtain of dark hair that fell across her face, Dawn was watching Buffy's every move. The second the rod was pointing in her direction, her hand shot out and clamped down on top of Buffy's.

With a brilliant flash, the rod fired, straight at Dawn. Buffy screamed and tossed the rod aside as her sister convulsed and collapsed into her arms.

"Dawn! Dawn! Answer me. Omigod, Dawn. Wake up because you are now grounded for months! How dare you do that? How dare you?"

A gentle moan reached her and with a gasp, Dawn's eyes flickered open.

"Buffy? It's OK. I'm OK. Spike – Demon – are they back?"

Buffy turned and the two sisters stared into the cage. William was on his feet now, gazing down at the bodies on the floor. And as they watched, Spike groaned and rolled over. He was alive.

Dawn gently prised Buffy's fingers from her shoulder. "Go check him out," she said. "Make sure he's OK. I'm fine."

Buffy threw her a look of endless gratitude. She knew she'd never be able to repay her sister for this gift. Then two strides took her back inside the cage and she was on her knees beside Spike, reaching out to touch his face. He looked desperately tired, strained and even paler than usual, but he was back. Her lover and now her soul mate. He gazed into her eyes but didn't speak. He just nodded. Buffy turned to touch Demon. She could tell he was back as well, although he was still unconscious, muttering words that were hard to understand. As she watched, Spike's hand cupped the back of her neck and she laid her head against him, revelling in the sensation of his fingers on her skin.

They were all back! Her boys, her family, all together again. She reached out to hold Demon's filthy hand. "Don't worry. We won't abandon you. You belong to us. We'll find a way to make you better."

He could hear Buffy speaking, knew the woman he loved was close by. He tried to open his eyes and couldn't. He tried to speak and couldn't make the words sound sensible. Why didn't William help? Couldn't he see? Surely he must know, feel, understand what had happened.

With an effort that almost cost him everything, he forced his eyes open a fraction. And what he saw was what he had feared. Buffy was locked in Spike's arms. But he, Spike, was here inside Demon's body. And Demon was inside his!

tbc