A/N: Another Sponge/Squid fic. One-sided told in Squidward's POV. Hope you enjoy!
THAT'S IT! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! This is the fifth time you've destroyed my house completely this month... How do you manage to be so stupid?
Oh, you'll fix it? How? Do you have about $40,000 on hand? Because that's how much I usually have to pay for all of this...
No! I don't want your help! I don't need you! Don't you get that? I can pay for this myself...
Oh, don't give me that sympathetic look. I'm not giving into that anymore. I do not need your help. Honestly, does anything get through to you?
It does? Yeah, that's why you kept following me around today when I told you not to.. And that's also why my house is now...RUBBLE!
Yeah, yeah, you're sorry. That's what you say every time something like this happens to me... But you keep on doing it, over and over. Now I'm homeless and I don't have nearly enough money to pay for the damages...
What? Yes I just said I could pay for it... I was lying! Of course I can't! I'm an unpaid, unloved, unappreciated, in-debt, non-talented, low-life octopus who lives in the underwater version of Hell every day of his life...
Why? You really had to ask that? Well, let's see.
I have a job I absolutely despise, and my cheapskate boss doesn't give me enough money to pay for food every week.
I play my clarinet and paint to my best ability, but people all around still mock me for being a pretentious, little wannabe... Especially Squilliam, who refuses to leave me alone. And yes, I do know deep down that he's better than me, ok! He's living my dream...
I live in a hick town where everybody is a slobby bottomfeeder that relies solely on fast food product to keep themselves living. Secret recipe, my ass. I wouldn't be surprised if it turned out to be weed. Just like pot-brownies.. No wonder they keep coming back. Plus, everybody completely ignores me.
Yes, I know you don't. I'm getting to that..
And finally the number one reason that I hate every living day of my life...is you.
Oh, don't give me that look, you know it's true! You refuse to leave me alone no matter how many times I tell you to go away, you constantly destroy my things and my own home, you can't take no for an answer, your laugh is ungodly annoying, you are an IDIOT, and you act like you haven't got a care in the world. Like all of the tragedies going on aren't really happening. You're oblivious... PLUS you NEVER listen to me! It's like you have kelp stuffed in your ears...
Yes, I really feel that way! I've despised you since the day you moved in! Why are you just NOW listening to me? I hate you! Despise you! Detest you! Abhor you! Loathe you! Any synonym of the word hate, that's how I feel towards you!
...Wait. Are...are you...? Are those...tears in your eyes? Are you...
N-no, wait, I didn't mean to... D-don't...d-don't start crying! Ugh, I can't stand it when you cry...
You didn't know I hated you so much? Quit blubbering for two seconds so you can actually form a sentence!
No, I don't want you dead! Why would you think that? Oh, because I just said I hated you...
Well, I don't hate you in that way! I wouldn't be that heartless... Look, I'm just upset, ok? My life is crumbling through my tentacles! Please stop crying...
No, Spongebob, I don't want you to- WHAT? KILL YOURSELF? WHAT IN NEPTUNE'S NAME WOULD MAKE YOU THINK I WOULD WANT YOU TO-
Well, yes I just said I hated you, but not in the way you think! I would never want you to kill yourself! I wouldn't want anyone to! I'm not that kind of person!
Sponge...ok...look, I'm sorry. Calm down. I've been frustrated lately... I really...I really just hate it here...
No, not just next to you. Just in Bikini Bottom... I came here to become an amazing connoisseur of the arts, and I've worked my ass off for it... But look where that's gotten me. Alone. Made fun of. Mocked. A terrible person.
You don't think I'm terrible? Oh good. You've stopped crying. But wait, you love everybody. You're just saying that.
Wh- Out of all of your friends, I'm the one you like the most? Why? I've acted like such a jackass to you. Why do you come after me?
Because you want to...make me happier? Oh yeah, right. Like I could while I'm living in this awful town.. I should just move out.
What? Why don't I?
...You just said... Why don't I just leave if I really want to?
W-wow... Umm...Err...
Stop looking at me like that, I'm thinking! Oh no, don't start crying again, please! I hate it when you cry...
Your question? Oh yeah.
...I-I...I really don't know... I really could just move...couldn't I?
But I don't..
Why?
...
...
...
Well...maybe...I don't know...
Maybe...there's something keeping me here.
No, not the Krusty Krab! No, not my art! (It's all gone now, anyways...)
No, something like...an actual person... Yeah. I hate admitting it but...yeah. That's why.
Whoa, why are you smiling at me like- Spongebob, get that smug look off your face!
Is it...you that's keeping me here? Are you being serious? Th-that's not it at all! Stop smiling at me, that's not the...
You know what. Screw it. If I'm staying here my whole life, I may as well just admit this. As much as it pains me to do so..
Yes, it's because of you. I am NOT bright red, stop giggling like that!
Yeah, I know I said that before, but... Ok, you're just slightly annoying.. I don't HATE you, ok? I honestly don't.
Then why do I stay because of you?
Because...you're the only person that gives a shit about what I do. About what I paint, and compose... You actually give me hope that...I could become a better...person... I'm always so depressed, and you always act so cheerful... The world needs more people like you. The people who recognize the ups of life instead of the downs. I've already screwed myself in that respect, but...your happiness gives me hope that I can maybe become a more amiable person. It really does give me hope.
Oof! Ok, ok... You're crushing my sides! What did I say about hugging?
What? You're happy you...got through to me? You mean...this is why you always did this...? To save me from my depression...? For...me...?
Yes, I'm crying, you idiot. You cry so much you should be able to recognize tears. This is embarrassing, though...
What? Will I ever leave, for real?
...No. I won't...
I won't leave...
If I have you...to help me...
Alright, now why don't you let go of me so we can have some fun in your pineapple?
Hide and go seek? Tag?
Something like that...