Miles takes her home and leaves only after making sure that she doesn't need a doctor.
She stays at home, not knowing what to do with her life now, with her two lives. She wanders the house where yesterday she thought she was happy. She had a husband who loved her, cared for her, was ready to do anything for her. She has a husband who loves her, cares for her, is ready to do anything for her. She has already lost the former and can't live with the latter. What is wrong with her? Why can't she be happy with her life?
Everything happened just as she had wished; they hadn't met and she married another man. Did that lessen the pain of loss? No!
She could see his face right in front of her. How he smiles at her. How he bickers with Miles. How serious he is about his work. Just like before only without her.
She pulls out a bottle, it doesn't matter what it is. All she wants is to drink until she is oblivious. And of course it's rum, the drink they shared on the beach mourning their friends. Damn! Will it be always this way? Will every detail always remind her of him?
She locks herself in a dining room and begins drinking.
-Are you okay?-She hears Jack's voice through the door. His care makes it even worse, she'd prefer he leave her alone.
-Yes, don't worry, go to bed without me.-
He leaves. She is sitting and staring into space.
(memories)
It's dark in the room. She lies in the bed and looks out at light on the path. She doesn't cry. This Island hasn't left her any tears.
She hears his muffled steps. James had returned from his night shift. She knows what will happen next. He does it every night. He will remove his jumpsuit, take a shower and then peek into her room. Each time she's pretending to be asleep, but she never goes to sleep before he peeks in. These visits are his way to tell her goodnight and she is happy he keeps doing that.
But today is different. Today, she wants him to leave her room as soon as possible. Today is exactly 4 years since she arrived on the Island.
She hears the door opens. After a few seconds it should close behind him. She is waiting for this, but nothing happens. She listens intently. Silence. Tired of waiting, she turns around and sees his silhouette standing against the door frame. It's dark, but she can feel his gaze.
-Are you okay? -
-Yes. Go to bed. It's late.-
He doesn't answer, just sits on the floor beside her bed.
-If you want to talk I'm here. You aren't alone anymore-He takes her hand.
She lies in the darkness and stares out in front of her. She doesn't want to cry anymore. She wants to tell him how thankful she is that he doesn't ask questions, but is just there for her. But he's already fallen asleep, and she doesn't want to wake him.
-Good night-she whispers, closing her eyes.
A/N: Thank you for your reviews. They means a lot to me.