A/N: Major angst alert here at the end, readers - be warned; but don't fret, it will still work out in the end!:)
Brian clasped Justin's hand as they walked the relatively short distance up to his upper-floor apartment. As he let go of Justin's hand on the landing, he had a chance to survey his surroundings a little more closely. He wasn't surprised to see that the blond's living space was relatively compact and sparse; it had the tall windows and ceilings characteristic of older, Victorian homes so it at least allowed a great deal of light to stream in from the front side facing the west. But the rooms themselves were small; he could see an eat-in kitchen off to the side of the hallway and an adjoining living area with a rather worn, gaudy-looking, Queen Ann sofa sitting against one wall and a matching, faded overstuffed chair perpendicular to it on the opposite side. Farther down the hall were two doorways – assumedly one for the bathroom and the other for Justin's bedroom.
As he gazed back at his companion, the pale face flushed a little in embarrassment. "It's not exactly the Taj Mahal," he acknowledged. "I'm sure you're used to much more fancy surroundings." Justin could tell simply by how Brian dressed and by the elegance he practically had oozing from every pore of his body that his apartment would be a hovel compared to what he no doubt lived in.
To his surprise, though, he found out the brunet hadn't been contemplating that at all. "Actually, I wasn't really thinking about that," Brian told him. "I was thinking this fits you in a way – I could see how all the interesting angles and lines of the architecture would appeal to someone artistic like you." He studied the eclectic collection of items on all the built-in shelves located in the living room first – relatively inexpensive knick knacks, really – but then he found his eyes drawn to several paintings scattered throughout the living room and in the hall.
There was a large, expressive abstract composed of different hues of purple, green, and orange-yellow hanging directly over the mantel of the imposing, tiled, wood-burning fireplace. The effect was both striking as well as riveting in its intensity as he found himself having difficulty turning away from it. Another painting on the opposite wall of the living room showcased a smaller work – it was a charcoal pencil street scene that was incredible in its detail. Even though he did not recognize the street showcased, the attention that had been paid to every face and every storefront depicted in it made him feel like he was actually there. He could even make out the veins on the leaves of the maple trees situated on both sides of the street.
He turned to gaze at Justin's face; the blond was staring back at him a little uncomfortably, as if he wasn't sure what to do or say. "You painted these?" Brian asked him with renewed appreciation for the younger man's talents.
Justin eyed him carefully, trying to figure out what Brian was thinking. "Yes," he said softly. "Art is my real passion – the wedding planning is just an avenue for me to express myself. And, of course, to make some money," he said, twisting his mouth wryly. "At least I was hoping it was going to be, anyway."
"And it will be," Brian assured him, nodding, knowing exactly where Justin was going with that comment. "I've seen your work, remember? You're very talented. "
As Justin blushed at the compliment, Brian added contemptuously, "Don't let that blowhard scare you, Justin," his eyes flashing in annoyance over the recollection of his and Chagall's conversation downstairs. "That's precisely what he is, too – a pompous, conceited blowhard who wouldn't know a piece of art from a mass-produced piñata in Mexico. And he doesn't know shit when it comes to real talent at all. Chagall is merely blowing smoke up his ass – he won't follow through with his threat. I know him too well, and when it's all said and done, the only person he's concerned about is himself. If he thinks there's any danger that his precious reputation might be ruined, he won't say a thing. And that's precisely what he will do – nothing."
Justin idly fingered the back of a nearby, metal and laminate red kitchen chair. He stared down at the floor as he replied, "You seem to know him well. I guess that shouldn't surprise me, though – you were going to marry the guy." He peered over at Brian questioningly; he still couldn't quite figure out just what had happened downstairs earlier.
Brian sighed. "Yeah, that's what I need to explain to you," he said softly. "Can we go sit down in the living room and talk?" When Justin didn't move after a couple of seconds, he said, "Please?"
Justin gazed into Brian's golden-green eyes; they seemed sincere enough, and he had certainly acted straightforward earlier when he had practically bounced Chagall out on his ass. And he really was curious to find out just what had caused Brian to agree to marry the man in the first place, only to blow up at him and almost throw the guy out. There could be no doubt, also, that Brian was as attracted to him as he was toward the brunet. He had to know exactly what was going on; he finally nodded and walked over to join Brian near the living room.
Hesitating where to sit because he already knew what his body's reaction would be to being so close to the other man, he chose instead to sit in the overstuffed chair facing the couch. Brian hid his initial disappointment quickly as he slowly sat down at the end of the couch closest to the chair and gazed at the beautiful, pale face that was staring back at him in puzzlement.
"This whole business with Chagall – the engagement and the marriage – it was all a set up," he began as he placed his hands on his knees and stared into Justin's soft blue eyes.
Justin frowned. "A set-up? As in what kind of set-up?"
"It was a business arrangement." Justin shook his head in confusion as Brian continued, "I made a bad decision a few years back – a really bad decision – that ultimately cost me my job at another agency. I didn't want to go to work for someone else after that but lacked the capital to break out on my own." He sighed, almost unable to comprehend what he thought at the time was a wise move. "Chagall was merely a convenient means to that end," he finally uttered.
Justin shook his head in bewilderment. "A means to an end? Brian, I don't understand. What does getting married to the man have to do with being able to open up your own agency?"
Brian was surprised that he really did care what Justin thought of him, and he was even more surprised to realize that he was afraid once he told Justin about his rather unsavory arrangement with Chagall, he would think less of him. But it was time – it was time to come clean; it had taken way too long as it was to get to where they were now. He just had to hope that Justin would understand.
He raised his head to stare into the intense sapphire eyes. "I needed capital to open up Kinnetik," he began by way of explanation. "And I was at Woody's one day and ran into Chagall – he was an old client of my former agency and we got to talking about old times over drinks. One thing led to another and before I knew it, the man had agreed to bankroll my entire startup costs under one condition."
Justin looked at him in shock. "You agreed to marry him in exchange for his financing your agency?" As Brian nodded in confirmation, he shook his head in confusion. "But Chagall said you were very successful, that money was no object when it came to your wedding, that you wanted a wedding to end all weddings." Justin swallowed the hard lump in his throat; even now after Brian had thrown his former fiancé out of his shop, he still felt odd when he merely thought of Brian marrying that arrogant man. For the time being, he refused to acknowledge that the feeling might actually be jealousy, but inside he knew that was exactly what it was.
"Well, it wouldn't do for the man to be marrying someone who wasn't of the same social stature as he," Brian said scornfully. "And he certainly wouldn't have wanted it passed around that he was merely marrying someone because he wanted to project the right kind of image." He shrugged. "I wanted Chagall's money for Kinnetik, and he wanted me. It was a mutually beneficial arrangement."
Justin stared at him in shock as Brian rubbed his face restlessly with his hand.
"Brian, I can't believe you would have gone along with that," he told the other man, whispering, "A man like you…you would have succeeded without his help. You didn't need him," he told him firmly. He turned his gaze away, almost in fear that he would give too much of his feelings away.
Brian took a chance and reached over to take one of Justin's hands in his as the blond turned to gaze into his golden, green eyes. He marveled at how soft Justin's hand was and how right it felt being clasped in his own as he conceded quietly, "Maybe not. If I hadn't been so damn impatient to get it done, I'm sure eventually I would have succeeded."
"Then why did you?" Justin asked him softly. "You…..you didn't really have feelings for him, did you?" He dreaded asking Brian that question, but for some strange, unfathomable reason, he had to know. His heart skipped a beat as he felt Brian languidly caressing the top of his hand with his thumb almost without realizing it; just that simple motion was making his pulse speed up like crazy as he waited anxiously for Brian to answer him.
Brian managed to hide his smile of satisfaction from Justin as he heard the distinctive sound of the green-eyed monster rearing its easily-recognizable head, even though the blond was trying hard not to be obvious about it. He was inordinately pleased that Justin was apparently bothered by the idea that he might have actually had feelings for Chagall, even though the only feelings he had had for that man had been anything but positive. Every day he had spent with that asshole of a sham fiancé had simply made him more convinced of what a horrible mistake he would be making if he went through with their charade. It wasn't until Justin had come along, however, that he realized there was no way he could possibly go through with it, no matter what the financial consequences would be.
He briefly thought about teasing Justin, but one look on his face and he knew he couldn't – he wouldn't – do that to him. He squeezed the pale hand slightly to get Justin's attention before honestly telling him, "No, Justin, the only feelings I had for that man were resentment over being talked into going along with it in the first place and anger toward myself for thinking it was actually a good idea."
"Then why did you?" Justin pressed him; inside he was doing somersaults at the discovery that Brian's feelings for the other man were just what he had suspected; cold and disinterested. That made his agreement to marry the man even more hard to understand, though.
Brian sighed. "Good question." He continued to idly rub Justin's hand as he paused to ponder that for a few seconds. "Ever since I first went into advertising, and found out how good I was at it, I wanted to run my own agency. I hated having to answer to someone else who didn't have a fucking clue where I was going with an idea. By the time they figured it out, I was already moving onto something else. I hated having to wait for someone else to get their ass in gear before I could move forward. When I lost my job, I'll be honest – it sucked, and not in a good way," he said ruefully, evoking a slight smile from his companion. "But after I thought about it, I began to see it as an opportunity to finally get what I wanted. There was only one problem; money, capital – something I didn't have."
He stared intently into Justin's eyes, almost ashamed to tell him the rest of it, but he knew he had to. He had almost waited too long to be honest with him and it had almost cost him what could be the best thing that ever happened to him as a result. "I met Chagall in Woody's that day, and like I said, after a few drinks I told him the whole story. Next thing I knew, he was proposing this stupid fake engagement and marriage deal as a way to boost his reputation in the gay community. He thought if he had a piece of eye-candy on his arm at all those stupid social engagements he had to attend, it would make him seem more important and influential." He shook his head. "That's always been the most important thing to him – how he looked to everyone else."
He averted his gaze to look over at the painting Justin had hung over the fireplace and in a softer voice admitted, "It was quite simple, Justin. In return for agreeing to marrying the asshole, he would provide whatever funds I needed to get my company back in the black." He forced himself to peer back at Justin, who was eyeing him thoughtfully, before he continued. "You should know more than anyone how hard it is to get a new business off the ground. If I had known now what I knew then, I never would have agreed to Chagall's terms. But I opened up Kinnetik and ran with it under the mistaken assumption that I could actually learn to live with his conditions to get what I wanted."
He gripped Justin's hand tighter as he continued softly, "I had agreed to the deal only with the intention that I would make enough money within the year after we entered into our ridiculous arrangement to pay him back and get out from under my deal with the devil. And maybe if you hadn't wound up being our wedding planner, Robert might have actually gotten me to go through with it." He smiled a little wisp of a smile now as Justin's eyes widened slightly in response. "But once I saw you…" He let his voice drop off almost in embarrassment as he took a moment to drink in the sight of this beautiful man that had so unexpectedly dropped into his life. "Well, once I saw you, I knew I couldn't do it, no matter what the cost. It just took me a while to admit it to myself," he confessed.
Justin actually blushed at the intense look he was receiving and the continual caress of his hand by the other man; the touch had been enough to set him on fire, but that voice; Brian's voice was making him crazy inside and quickly inflaming his desire even higher for him. His heart was singing at the disclosure that Brian had never been interested in Chagall; he had merely looked at it as a business arrangement.
"So what will you do now, then, Brian? Your business isn't actually in danger of going under, is it?" He couldn't believe that with Brian's talent that could be possible.
Brian looked at him ruefully. "Well, let's just say I'm not planning any trips to Miami Beach any time soon. My employees might not like it if they wind up without a paycheck as a result." He shook his head as he ran his free hand through his tousled hair. "What a fucking mess! I never should have gotten involved with him in the first place."
Justin studied his face and felt guilty as hell for placing the other man in such a position. "Brian, are you sure he won't try and make trouble for you?" Justin asked him in concern. "He was so angry when he left."
Brian snorted. "Believe me, Justin, he knows I keep my word. If I say I'll go to the media with his little scheme, he knows I mean it. He has a lot more to lose right now than I do."
"I'm still sorry, Brian," Justin told him regretfully. "I'm sorry you won't have the funds now to revitalize your agency."
"You don't really mean that, do you?" Brian asked him softly. "At least I hope not."
He gazed over at Brian in puzzlement. "Why not?"
Brian curled his lips under almost shyly as he continued to work on driving Justin crazy with the lazy circles he was still making on his clasped hand. "Because if I hadn't made that asinine agreement with Chagall in the first place, we wouldn't have needed to consult a wedding planner. And if we hadn't needed to do that, our paths might never have crossed." He huffed out a small breath of irony. "In a way, then, I owe the fucker a big favor."
Justin's pulse sped up at the look Brian was giving him. "I guess we both do," he murmured, nodding. "But you're still going to have to come up with a way to….." His lips suddenly began to tingle as Brian reached over to place the palm of his other hand against his mouth.
"Do you really want to spend the next several hours discussing that idiot Chagall and my money woes?" Brian gently chided him, his voice almost a soft growl. "Or would you prefer to spend it doing something else much more pleasurable?"
Justin's eyes widened as he watched Brian stand up and pull on his hand to join him. He hesitated for just a second before he rose to his feet. Brian didn't waste any time wrapping his free hand around Justin's slim waist, praising whatever cheap clothing manufacturer that had made such a loosely-fitting piece of clothing that allowed his hand to snake up under the fabric and feel the soft, warm flesh underneath. He heard Justin jump slightly and moan softly as he took his other hand and wrapped him firmly in his arms as he pressed their bodies tightly together. As they stared intently into each other's eyes, his gaze slowly was drawn downward to linger on the pink lips, especially the full, rounded lower one that appeared just perfect for a mind-altering blowjob. He hoped that he would soon find out for sure as he felt Justin's heart beating rapidly against his own, seconds before he couldn't wait any longer and crushed their mouths together.
He savored the taste of the lower, fleshy lip briefly as he took a small nip to investigate further; it was only momentary, however, because he realized he would never be content with just a sample. Reaching up to cradle one hand tightly against Justin's neck, he twisted his face for a better angle and pushed farther in, his request for admittance rapidly turning into an urgent demand that only the blond could fulfill. His body felt like it was on fire as Justin briefly resisted and then opened his lips to welcome the intrusion.
With another soft growl, Brian took a second to catch his breath before plunging deeply back in, feeling heady from the taste, smell, and sounds coming from this beautiful man – a man he had a feeling he would never grow tired of. The two men stood there, supporting themselves by holding on for dear life as they took turns exploring each other's lips and bodies as their hands and mouths explored every available inch. But it was not enough for Brian – he had to have more, and he had to have it now.
It was only a physical need for air that made him detach his mouth from Justin's with a soft pop. As he stared down into the darkening blue orbs and he observed the flushed face and swollen, thoroughly-kissed lips, he thought he had never seen anything more captivating in his life, and he knew any last modicum of patience had rapidly run out. "Justin," he whispered huskily. "Bedroom," he demanded. He possessively took a hold of the blond's shirt in his hands and began to push him down the hallway as his lips reattached themselves to his mouth, his neck, his collarbone – anywhere he could reach as they continued down the narrow passage.
Justin's whole body was humming with a need, a craving; a longing that he could no longer deny and didn't want to. This man had given up his one possibility of stabilizing his business by rejecting Chagall's crazy scheme for him? Just the knowledge filled him with a touch of guilt but also a rush of excitement and desire. It made him feel so powerful to know that he had that kind of effect on such a sexy, provocative and dangerously handsome man. A shock of thrill rang through his body as Brian continued to scope out every inch of his face, his neck, his mouth, his eyes, his shoulders with his lips as he continued to push him determinedly toward his small bedroom. Right now, though, that rather compact, tiny room seemed like a palace to him as they arrived at the doorway and, taking one quick glance to ensure he had the right room, Brian continued urging him toward the modest, twin-sized bed.
The brunet broke apart from their embrace to impatiently pull Justin's shirt up in an insistent demand that it be gone. Their eyes never left each other as Justin raised his arms to help accommodate his request; no sooner had the shirt been removed than Brian's hands flew to his pants and he began to unsnap them as Justin shivered in anticipation. He took advantage of Brian's concentration on undressing him to do the same as he somewhat shyly reached over to his companion's chest to unfasten the silky garment molded to the taut, sculptured chest; his hands were shaking so badly from the sensations that Brian was evoking in him as his hands lingered near his crotch, however, that he was having difficulty even unbuttoning one button.
Brian, however, wasn't having that problem – he was much too eager to reach the prize that was awaiting him as he succeeded in unsnapping and unzipping Justin's pants in record time and, taking one more look into the expressive, dilated blue eyes, he took hold of both the waistband and white briefs and impatiently tugged them downward, finally freeing the impressive, swollen cock that had been uncomfortably encased there.
As Justin toed off his shoes and stepped out of the remainder of his clothing, Brian's own body went into overdrive and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of the fully-exposed, fully-aroused and flushed body standing in front of him; he took several moments to sweep his gaze over the petite, perfectly proportioned body starting at his feet and ever so slowly raking upward to dwell a few seconds on the leaking cock and then continue upward to admire the slender, trim waist and chest before finally coming to rest on Justin's flushed face; his mouth was slightly parted as he breathed out small wisps of breath and his eyes were wide and the color of an ever-changing ocean as he met Brian's intense gaze and stared back at him in unabashed desire that almost matched his own.
In the time that Brian had managed to completely disrobe Justin, Justin had merely succeeded in loosening a few buttons of Brian's shirt. The blond stood there, feeling exposed not only physically but also emotionally, as Brian hungrily devoured him with his eyes. Justin shivered at the intensity written all over Brian's chiseled face as the brunet slowly reached out to lightly stroke his cheek. "You are so fucking beautiful," he murmured appreciatively as Justin's face flushed an even darker shade of pink at his touch and the husky tone of his voice. The blond sighed in pleasure, the trembling of his body giving away his strong attraction as, emboldened, Brian edged Justin backward until the blond felt his lower legs bump up against the bed's mattress. Brian kept his eyes locked with Justin's as he reached out and gave the blond's shoulder a small push; as Justin leaned down on the edge of the bed with his hands behind him on the mattress, Brian couldn't help smirking a little at the obvious look of desire written on Justin's face as he finished unbuttoning the rest of his shirt and slowly shrugged it off his lean, bronze shoulders. He could hear Justin's small pants of anticipation as he then began working on his trousers, opening and unzipping them with alacrity but then deliberately taking his time afterward before finally pulling both his pants and briefs down to expose his burgeoning desire for the man staring back at him in an aroused, barely-uncontrolled state.
As he stepped out of his shoes and socks, his clothing now pooled on the floor by his feet, Brian slowly approached the few steps toward the bed to stand over the blond like some Greek god. "I'm not letting you out of this bed for the rest of the night," Brian pointedly warned him as Justin's eyes widened in response. As Justin scooted back up toward the headboard, Brian knelt on the mattress between his legs, looming over him as his cock grazed his belly.
Justin thought his temperature must have shot up by at least a hundred degrees at the sight of this bigger-than-life specimen of a perfect human male. The man's cock, hard as steel, taunted him as it swung up and down on his stomach; his skin quivered in response each time he felt the leaking, wet tip etching a sensual streak across his body. He sucked in his breath at the exquisite torture. He knew before the night was over, he would experience pleasures that he had never experienced before as Brian supported his weight on his hands and pressed his body fully against his. At the intimate contact, Justin gasped at the sensations coursing through him.
"Brian," he managed to breathe out as the brunet smiled down at him. "I….." He wasn't even sure what he was struggling so hard to say; the feeling of having Brian lying on top of him, hot skin against hot skin, was almost too overwhelming to verbally express. He marveled at how their bodies seem to fit like a glove, despite their height differences; it was almost as if they had been made at birth for each other and only now were they finally being reunited.
Brian's hot breath washed over his face like a sensual caress as the brunet murmured, "There's no one around now to stop what I've been wanting to do for a long time now." His darkened, lust-filled gaze bored into the mesmerizing blue eyes as he stared unblinking at Justin and huskily added, "I'm not letting you escape this time." Not ever, came silently unbidden to his mind – and his heart - as Justin gazed back at him, both their hearts beating a rapid melody in unison over the sensations churning inside each other.
As Brian swooped down to lick a trail along the salty, perspiration-soaked flesh of Justin's pale neck, he heard the blond say shakily, "I'm not going anywhere," before he raised his head and staring once more for only a moment into the intense blue eyes, he smashed his lips against the plump mouth. Justin moaned at the almost savage contact as Brian demanded entrance to fully taste him; Justin was almost dizzy with sensation as, in surrender, he instinctively opened his mouth to allow entrance just before Brian's tongue plunged in to begin a more thorough exploration.
The blond reached up almost blindly with his hands to begin a sensual voyage of his own as Brian continued to twist and angle his face to deepen their kiss. His right hand twisted several strands of reddish, auburn hair as his other hand found itself captured against Brian's chest, a willing, sensual prisoner to the body moving so hotly against his. He felt Brian's pounding pulse and his own heart swelled with the knowledge of power he apparently had over this incredible man.
There was no room for speaking at that moment; even if Justin had wanted to say anything, Brian's mouth effectively prevented him from doing anything except kissing him back and just holding on for dear life. Finally after several seconds, Brian released him to inhale a much-needed breath; the brunet's hands cradled his head as Justin lay there, feeling the hot, taut skin of his lover hovering above him.
He watched silently as Brian raised his body up to reach over and retrieve a condom and small bottle of lube he hadn't even known the man had placed on the side of the mattress; as Brian returned to kneel between his legs, he swallowed hard and bit his lip at the almost predatory look of determination on Brian's face, knowing that even if he wanted to, there was no way the other man was letting him out of this bed before fucking him senseless. His heart threatened to burst out of his chest in almost unbearable tension as he watched the brunet sheath his enormous, purplish cock and slather some lube up and down the shaft. He watched, unable to turn away, as Brian leaned back and reached out for his legs, gently but firmly placing them over his shoulders before, moments later, he literally felt the cold reality of what they were about to do as Brian rubbed some lube around his hole.
He sucked in a sharp intake of breath at the intrusion and squirmed at the feeling of Brian's finger pressing inward. "Fuck!" he couldn't help crying out as another finger joined the first one and Brian spread his fingers apart to prepare him.
"Pain and pleasure," Brian whispered huskily, leaning down to bestow another quick, reassuring kiss on the trembling lips. "Pain first, but the pleasure…the pleasure that will come afterward," he continued as he placed yet another finger inside Justin to stretch him and the blond writhed in part torment, part exhilaration. "The ride of pleasure will be so much more worth it." And with that, he lined up his cock with the now-lubricated and expanded hole and pushed in slightly but firmly.
Justin cried out once more as all the nerves in his body sung at the sensation; it was so hot, so tight, so unlike anything he had ever experienced before with any man. It had been so long since he had been with someone, but even now, he knew that nothing had ever felt like this before, and nothing would ever feel this way with anyone else. Until then, he had never believed in destiny or having a soul mate or fate, but as Brian pressed in even more urgently to fully encase himself inside, and he felt his body soar to new heights of pleasure, he knew how wrong he had been.
Brian wanted to take things slow the first time with Justin and allow him to adjust, but he found once he had entered the unbelievably tight passage and felt the muscles squeezing against his cock in response, he knew he was lost. There was no way he could take this slow and easy; he had to have more – much more. He almost mindlessly pushed in harder, pulling out slightly only to plunge back in even more violently, hoping that Justin would understand this uncontrollable need swirling inside him and the total lack of control he had over what he was doing. He heard Justin moan and felt him writhe beneath in mutual pleasure as they rocked together in unison, in and out, in and out, their bodies heading toward an impending culmination of undeniable pleasure and release. He reached down to clench his hand around his lover's slippery, hot, silky shaft and pumped his hand in time with his own body's tempo as Justin gasped out in almost unbearable pleasure.
"Justin," he managed to whisper huskily as he felt the lithe body beneath him clenching in a silent signal of imminent climax. He heard Justin cry out once more before his body exploded into a quivering mass of ecstasy and he felt the sticky, warm liquid spewing over his belly and chest soon afterward.
The incredible beauty of Justin's flushed, sweat-soaked body, tousled hair, and dark-filled blue eyes and the sound of his climatic release of emotion was enough to push Brian's own body over the edge as he felt his muscles tighten and demand its own release; moments later, his own control shattered as he came with the strongest, most mind blowing experience he had ever had with any man.
Chest sweaty and heaving with the aftereffects, he lay on top of the small, petite body and cradled the blond for a few seconds to try and regain some semblance of normal breathing before, with extreme reluctance, he twisted his body and slipped out, tying off the condom and discarding it in the floor's trashcan by the side of the bed before rolling back over to gaze at the vision lying beside him.
Justin's chest was rising rapidly up and down, just like his own, as their eyes locked onto each other's.
As he leaned on his elbow to stare at the blue eyes, he couldn't help reaching over to gently brush back some of the sweaty bangs plastered to the pale face. His own face softened into a slight smile as he whispered one heartfelt word, "Incredible."
Justin's face flushed again at the penetrating gaze as he revisited the almost indescribable sensations that had just rushed through his body at their coupling; their lovemaking – he just couldn't bear to call it simply fucking after the feelings that Brian had generated in him – had been the most unbelievable sensations he had ever experienced. Oh, he had dreamed about this moment – even when he knew Brian was engaged and seemingly unattainable – but nothing had prepared him for this. Not the looks Brian had given him, not the feelings Brian had engendered in him, not the way his body had responded to everything this man said and did. He never, ever, knew it could be like this. He closed his eyes briefly and sighed as Brian's hand lightly traced an invisible trail from his brow to his cheek and then over his swollen, reddened lips.
"How could I have ever been so stupid?" he unexpectedly heard Brian say as he opened his eyes to stare into his lover's face. Was Brian regretting what they had just done? No, that couldn't be, he tried to reassure himself, as he saw the raw, tender emotion etched on the handsome, perfect face.
He frowned a little in worry. "What?" he whispered almost in dread, praying that Brian wasn't going to say he had just made a big mistake rejecting his one way to rescue his company.
"To think that I could go through with that fake marriage to that son of a bitch," Brian responded softly, his eyes drinking in the pale, almost glowing face as he idly caressed Justin's cheek. "When I had this right in front of my face the whole time. This feeling…." He shook his head. "How empty it would have been….how incredibly, fucking empty," he murmured as he stared into his lover's face.
Justin's face lit up with pleasure at the heartfelt confession; he wasn't sure if he could handle the realization that Brian had given up a chance to pump maybe millions of dollars into Kinnetik simply because he chose to be with him instead. It was an awesome notion, a scary notion, a terrifying notion; but it filled him with immense satisfaction and happiness just the same.
"I'm glad," he managed to say with a shy smile as he reached his own hand up to brush against the warm, soft lips before Brian leaned down gently this time to place a tender kiss on his waiting mouth; the kiss slowly smoldered as Justin opened his lips to accept Brian's entreaty and felt the brunet's tongue snaking back in once more. As Brian pushed him down to lie on his back on the mattress, the night sounds from outside the bedroom walls were the only other sounds that could be heard for the next several hours as they continued their sensual exploration of each other.
Early Morning
Brian slowly stirred stiffly on the small mattress, trying initially to determine why everything seemed so strangely unfamiliar to him. He knew instantly that this wasn't his comfortable, king-sized bed at the loft. As his eyes fluttered open, he slowly became aware of the warm, soft body spooned up against his chest and he smiled in recollection of last night's tumultuous events. He and Justin had made love and fucked their way from one end of the mattress to the other, taking turns licking, sucking, and fucking until their bodies finally had to surrender to exhaustion a few hours ago.
He would have loved nothing better than to stay there holding this man in his arms until he awoke and they could start anew once more, but he knew it was important he arrive at Kinnetik early today for his important meeting with Swanson Electronic's CEO. Justin's ability to provide him with an effective marketing campaign for the prestigious electronics firm could mean the difference between losing everything and bailing himself out without Chagall's help, something he could no longer depend upon. He would have to go it alone now – and he felt strongly that today would be the defining moment as to whether he would succeed or not. If he did, it would all be thanks to the blond vision slumbering softly in his arms.
He gently disengaged himself from Justin's embrace, taking a moment to stare into the peaceful, almost angelic face with feelings he wasn't quite ready to fully acknowledge before he regretfully rose to sit on the side of the mattress. He rubbed the sleep from his face before rising to walk across the hallway to the bathroom.
Realizing he would not have sufficient time to return to the loft, he walked across the hallway to take a brief, 10-minute shower to refresh himself before returning to the bedroom to retrieve his clothing from yesterday. He was thankful for having the insight to keep a few suits and shirts at the agency handy, because he knew he would have to change into a fresh set of clothes once he arrived at Kinnetik.
Fully clothed once more in quick order, he walked quietly over to the bed to stand over the still-sleeping form of his lover and smiled. He didn't have the heart to wake him, knowing that both of them had only had at best a few hours' sleep. It didn't really matter, anyhow, because he had every intention of coming back here as soon as his work was done later today. He and Justin still had a lot to talk about, and he was going to enjoy getting to know all about this fascinating man.
He spied a small notepad and pen lying on the nearby nightstand, and reached for them to jot down a quick note:
J – Had to go into work. Will be by later to see you. Last night was indescribable. B
He searched for a good spot to place the note so Justin would be sure to see it, finally settling on the dresser situated near the door. Draping his tie loosely around his neck, he turned around and started to walk toward the dresser. As he approached it, the sun's rays were shining brilliantly, almost blindingly, off a metal object lying on top of the rather beat-up, wooden piece of furniture.
Shielding his eyes against the bright light with his hand, Brian squinted to try and ascertain what it was. His heart dropped in his throat and his eyes darkened in anger as he walked over to the dresser and reached over to pick up the offending object – a thin, gold chain encircling a man's wedding band.
Brian's hand shook a little as he picked up the chain and stared at the object in denial and disbelief. All sorts of questions and answers – none of them happy ones – swirled through his mind as he stared at the shiny object swinging back and forth below his fingers. No…..I don't understand….No…..
His fist clenched around the chain, his knuckles white with fury and jealousy as he turned to stare at the man he had made love to last night. Feelings of betrayal and humiliation welled up inside him as he thought, yeah….how could I have been so stupid? So gullible? Any other time, he would have never thought about giving his heart to another man – they were all just objects, ways to briefly fulfill his needs and his pleasures, a short interlude until he could move on to the next conquest. Just once, just this one time, he had surrendered his emotions to someone and now they had just been splintered into a tiny, million pieces; his heart bled with a pain that was almost unbearable as he contemplated how he had been deceived by a man who had stolen his emotions with no intention of reciprocating in kind.
He took a deep breath of resolve as slowly his heart began to harden into a lump of unfeeling, indifferent steel. He would never make the mistake of allowing his heart to love or be open to love ever again. Before his heart closed permanently, he allowed himself one more brief moment of grief as he flung the necklace and ring across the room to land in a heap in the far corner and balled the note up tightly in his fist before dropping it on top of the dresser and walking out.